The Underworld Banquet (1)
Today was one of those days spent in the office with Mente, both of us practically tearing our hair out in frustration. It was the day I would finally solve Charon's long-standing complaint that most of the souls arriving from the mortal world carried the overwhelming scent of mint.
"Ah, Hades, you're only asking about that now... My nose has been..."
"I see. I'm sorry. You should have told me sooner..."
"Don't misunderstand me. It's not that I hate your symbol or find the smell unpleasant... It's just, well..."
"...I'll discuss it with Mente right away and find a solution."
Athena had mentioned it before—the unique aroma of mint was far too strong even before reaching the Acheron. After checking at the entrance to the Underworld myself and asking Charon directly, the result was clear.
"The mint scent is stronger than I expected. No wonder some people can't stand it."
"Lord Hades. If mint spreads as food, wouldn't that actually increase the amount used during funerals?"
"Even so, humans wouldn't just throw away a plant they use for eating at funerals..."
Mint was a plant with remarkable reproductive and survival abilities. Perhaps it was because it had been born from the power of Mente, who had once been a nymph? Yet in my previous life long ago, there had been no nymphs...
While discussing this with Mente as I gazed at the mint leaves on my desk, I suddenly found myself craving a refreshing cup of mint tea.
"Lord Hades?"
"Just a moment..."
I rose from my seat and retrieved the Cornucopia. Sliding my hand into the broken horn, I pictured a yellow fruit—a lemon.
Plop.
"Wow... So this is the Cornucopia. I've never seen it before."
"We don't need to eat, but it's quite useful when you want a little something to refresh the palate."
I levitated the lemon that had emerged from the Cornucopia, peeled it in midair, and combined it with the mint leaves...
"Do you prefer it a little sweet?"
"Of course! I absolutely adore honey. Near Mount Etna, there are bees blessed by Pan that..."
When I upended the Cornucopia and imagined honey, a golden liquid began to flow out slowly. I caught the right amount in the air, mixed it thoroughly, and poured it into a golden goblet. Soon, lemon-honey-mint tea was complete.
"This is the mint tea Lord Hades made himself...!"
The finished tea glowed with a soft golden hue in the goblet. I offered some to Mente, whose eyes were sparkling with delight, and took several sips myself.
Slurp—
The perfectly ripened lemon delivered just the right tartness, blending with the refreshing mint aroma and the sweetness of the finest honey I could imagine. The result was an outstanding flavor.
"Wow... This is incredibly delicious. Mortals would love this taste."
"If there are any gods with free time right now, I should call them over and share it."
"I'll go get them. Lady Styx was resting in her room earlier..."
Mente, who had already drained her cup and was licking her lips, left the office. I waited for her return, sipping my tea. Increasing the varieties of mint to encourage humans to consume it in all sorts of dishes seemed like a solid plan... Or perhaps I could issue an oracle telling people not to persecute those who disliked the scent. Personal tastes in food varied so widely that an oracle saying it was fine to avoid my followers who hated mint might work...
Creak.
"Hades. Mente called for us."
"What are you sharing with us this time?"
"Some reward for all our hard work, perhaps..."
"Mint tea? Isn't that the plant humans only use during funerals?"
The ones who entered the office alongside Mente were Lady Styx, along with Moros and Keres, who symbolized destructive death and inevitable death respectively. I offered them seats and recreated the lemon-mint-honey tea I'd just prepared. A subtle, sweet fragrance filled the office, tickling everyone's noses.
"It's tea made from the mint I'm spreading throughout the mortal world. Please, everyone, try it."
"As you mentioned before, you're propagating it as an ingredient because of the terrible mint scent the souls carry?"
"Hmm... It's reminiscent of Dionysus's wine."
"Mixing in honey, mint, and lemon... What if we added other spices?"
"This is absolutely delicious!"
Once a cup of the pale tea had been placed before each god, I summoned roasted lamb from the Cornucopia to pair with the mint tea. The well-cooked meat was generously sprinkled with herbs and spices. Juices slowly seeped along the grain of the meat as I offered it to everyone.
"Mmm... The meat and mint complement each other perfectly."
"Humans make bread from the grains blessed by Demeter. This mint tea would go wonderfully with even the hardest loaves..."
"Wouldn't mint suit fish dishes as well? It seems it could serve as an excellent spice."
Watching them enjoy mortal cuisine, I continued pulling more dishes from the Cornucopia—roasted rodents served with beans and figs, salads with tomatoes and cucumbers... Before long, the office had transformed into a lavish feast.
"It's not quite ambrosia, but it's still quite enjoyable."
"...Should I call the other gods over as well?"
"Mmm. Gulp. I saw Lord Hypnos earlier..."
The gathering meant to gather opinions on the mint tea had instantly become a full-blown meal. Oh well. I'd have to discuss the mint situation with Mente separately later.
"In that case, let's just hold a proper banquet. Everyone's been working hard lately, haven't they?"
"Oh! That's an excellent idea!"
"We can afford to rest for a day."
"The workload in the Underworld has decreased considerably..."
"It's not bad to have this instead of the usual ambrosia and nectar."
I decided to summon every god I could. Even the relatively idle administrators and the three Minos brothers, who served as judges, would be invited to the banquet.
"Herald! Inform Lady Lethe, who is managing affairs in the souls' residential district, that I am looking for her. And tell the one currently guiding souls along the River Styx..."
The gods who had gathered in the office relocated to the Underworld's banquet hall. The deities summoned by the heralds I'd sent to various locations began arriving one after another. I upended the Cornucopia once more. Birds roasted on skewers and sprinkled with herbs, salads of bread and vegetables rolled small and dressed with cheese and olive oil... Aged wine with beautiful color, though not quite on the level of what Dionysus himself would produce.
"Wow... The Underworld's banquets are truly magnificent."
"Hehe. Mente, even if this isn't Olympus, it won't fall short of the feasts held in the underwater palace."
"Food from Lord Hades' Cornucopia could never taste bad to begin with..."
Stir-fried dishes combining well-aged cheese with tomatoes and peppers. Wraps made with meat, peppers, and cabbage leaves. Yemista—tomatoes and pumpkins hollowed out and stuffed with meat... Countless dishes filled the banquet hall as the gods whetted their appetites with wine, eagerly anticipating the feast to come.
Creak—
The three sisters of the Erinyes, the goddesses of vengeance—not Nemesis—entered the hall. With their bronze wings and snake hair, they looked somewhat awkward and hesitant...
"Ahem... Are we truly allowed to participate in the banquet?"
"Hello! I'm Mente, who recently became the goddess of mint!"
"Ah. A newly born deity. The nymph who created mint?"
"Hey, Tisiphone. It's been a while. Have there been fewer adulterers in the mortal world lately?"
"...Thanatos."
Fortunately, they seemed to be fitting in well. I felt a surge of pride that my efforts were finally bearing fruit. It had been a good decision to occasionally bring the other gods to the dark caves on the outskirts of the Underworld where the Erinyes resided. Aversion to their terrifying appearance tended to fade after repeated encounters over time.
"...This lesser god Medusa greets Lady Alecto, she of unending anger."
"Actually, I had been thinking of visiting you."
"Is that so..."
"If you had carried your rage with you even into the Underworld, I would have sought to punish the gods as well."
"Even those two gods...?"
I was slightly surprised by the conversation between Medusa and Alecto. In truth, the Furies rarely appeared before the most powerful deities. It was the same principle that allowed Hera, despite governing marriage, to kill a violated woman yet remain unable to harm Zeus himself.
Alecto sighed and continued speaking to the bowed Medusa.
"Poseidon and Athena committed a terrible wrong against you. You must resent the gods a great deal, but..."
"Yes..."
"I hope you understand that not all gods are like that."
I noticed their gazes turning in my direction and looked away. Ahem... It's not that I'm particularly virtuous. The problem is that all the others are somehow flawed.
Fortunately, the newly ascended goddesses Medusa and Mente were getting along well with everyone. My efforts to educate the other deities had been worthwhile. I had wanted to eliminate discrimination based on low rank or humble origins as much as possible, and it seemed those efforts were paying off.
"When should we begin?"
"Huh? Lord Charon? What brings you here?"
"Ehh... Tsk tsk. Am I not allowed to come? I left things to my empowered avatar for a moment. Still, I must return soon."
"Morpheus. What were you thinking, sending a dream right before I fell completely asleep?"
"It seems I was dreaming as well..."
"The citizens of Athens mistook it for an oracle. Be more careful next time."
"Ugh... Hades, let's start already. It looks like everyone's here..."
Lady Styx called out to me with a slightly intoxicated air from the nectar, even though the banquet hadn't officially begun. No matter how difficult her duties were, wasn't she drinking a bit too much nectar?
All eyes turned to me. I slowly surveyed the gathering—Lady Lethe, Lady Styx, Medusa and Mente who still looked slightly awkward, Thanatos who continued to work so hard... Along with countless other gods and Underworld officials. These were the grateful souls who always supported and assisted me.
I hoped today's banquet would serve as a small token of appreciation for them all.
"Ahem. Ahem."
I stood and slowly raised my golden goblet filled with nectar. The other gods followed suit, lifting their own cups.
"Then let the banquet of the underworld begin! It may be modest compared to Olympus, but I hope you will all enjoy yourselves to the fullest today!"
Ugh... That formal tone feels incredibly awkward. Zeus ruled Olympus with absolute authority, so he was used to it, but the Underworld operated on a somewhat more equal footing...
After I finished speaking, Thanatos—one of the eldest present—raised his voice.
"Glory to the underworld!"
"""Glory to the underworld!"""
And so began an uncertain banquet whose end no one could predict...