Chapter 66
Chapter 66
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Translator: Ace
Chapter: 66
Chapter Title: 25. Happy Happy Gym (1)
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The chief aide rummaged through the documents.
This was the aide's office at the International Hunter Federation.
That morning, an unbelievable anonymous tip had come in.
At the upcoming year-end event in Lair, in the S+ grade dungeon "Melishia's Ballroom," demons of Collapse rank and Calamity rank might make an appearance.
"……."
The aide, having skimmed the documents, stroked his chin.
This was a novel.
It was packed with claims that seemed plausibly woven together no matter how you looked at it.
1. A demon unit near the Balkan Peninsula was heading toward Korea. Because the dungeon "Melishia's Ballroom" was in Japan's territorial waters.
2. From uninhabited islands in the North Pacific all the way to Saipan, random obelisks had popped up. They were mana-concentrating structures for gathering massive magical power.
3. Recently, the value of magic stones had skyrocketed. Someone was raking them in like crazy.
4. In several countries where it was suspected that demons were influencing top political figures, they were demanding that their Lair cadets skip Lair's year-end event. Pulling out of territorial battles.
And so on. The anonymous tip wove together a dozen or so political, economic, and social issues into one central claim.
—Something was going to happen at Melishia's Ballroom.
Something very dangerous.
The aide turned his gaze to the display.
He verified the tip's claims with data. It checked out, more or less.
But the questionable part was how all the evidence was so disconnected.
So the aide stroked his chin again.
This was a gossipy mess full of holes.
Yeah, that's what they call novels... But.
'Why do the pieces fit together so perfectly?'
The evidence was so scattered that even he had trouble grasping the claim at a glance.
After pondering for a moment, the aide asked his secretary.
"Source. Where did this come from?"
"It was, uh, anonymous……."
"No. There must be some trace, like footprints."
"Complete anonymity. It was on my desk when I got in."
"Why didn't you mention it sooner?"
"Don't you remember? I definitely told you earlier……."
At the secretary's words, the dazed aide burst into hearty laughter.
"Right, because it was you who said it."
Whoever it was, they were creepy thorough.
Strong enough to infiltrate the International Hunter Federation headquarters' secretariat. A superhuman or a demon.
The tip's contents were thinly evidenced, but the distant pieces all told the same story.
Big ears. Long nose. Fat body. Too little to identify separately. But put together, anyone could see it was an elephant.
What did that mean?
It wasn't deducing the whole from puzzle pieces. Knowing the whole meant scattering pieces haphazardly and they still fit.
So this was a whistleblower.
'...or a ploy disguised as one.'
Complex claims usually hid ulterior motives.
And ulterior motives always involved interests.
Demon organizations weren't corporations. Their biology was akin to religious sects.
If it were one denomination, they wouldn't fight like this.
Seems the factions had split.
Knock knock!
"Federation Leader. Chief Aide Jefferson here."
The aide reported the tip's contents to the Federation Leader.
Soon, a major conference convened at the Hunter Federation. Heads of state and top federation executives attended.
The meeting's gist was this.
There was a tip, and it resembled phenomena from before the Great War.
So it might be worth dipping a toe in.
Blowing it up big would squander a chance to purge demons, like last time.
So discreetly, play along, minimize our losses.
Cut off an arm and make sure it doesn't heal—rub some dirt in it.
"That would make the cadets hostages……."
A delegate's mutter was recorded by the secretary.
Who else but last year's Nobel Peace Prize winner to play the good guy for a moment.
But that was it.
No one pushed to cancel the event.
They were all veterans of the East Asia Great War. Soldiers who had been powerless while a third of humanity died.
For soldiers who could weigh lives, overlooking small sacrifices to prevent greater ones was par for the course.
There was no room for life ethics or humanitarianism there.
Next topic: who would lead the covert task force.
In an era where peace spread like a plague.
No country wanted to shove their own rankers into danger. Even volunteering wouldn't spotlight the credit.
Passing the buck was easy. It was happening in Japan's territorial waters. Who'd regret it most?
The Japanese delegate sweated coldly, proposing alternatives, but no one backed him.
Thus the meeting ended.
A woman in her twenties lying in the conference room's air vent pressed a finger to her temple.
'Mission accomplished, my liege.'
'A covert task force from Japan's royal rankers will be formed.'
'The Federation will be on high alert now,'
'so Your Liege need not trouble yourself.'
Well done.
"What? You want me to read you a fairy tale?"
Nod nod.
It was the first time Winter had asked for a fairy tale reading.
Summer scowled.
It was a hassle.
"……."
Winter, facing her, scowled too.
He didn't particularly want Summer to read it either.
But today, Spring and Autumn were at class, and Winter was dying to know the contents of the new fairy tale book Spring had bought yesterday.
"Then read it your... no. Come here."
Summer sat with daddy legs on the sofa, and Winter slotted right between them.
The fairy tale was The Fairy and the Woodcutter.
"Huh? What? You don't know this one?"
"……?"
"This is the one where the woodcutter's chopping wood in the mountains, right?"
Nod.
"Then suddenly a deer comes sprinting from over there. And it says to the woodcutter, 'I'm fucked. Hunters are chasing me. Hide me, please.'"
Nod.
"So the woodcutter grins wide and says trust me, hides it."
Nod.
"In his stomach."
Nod...?
Summer rubbed Winter's belly and smacked her lips. "Ah, fuck, now I crave yukhoe." "Tender deer meat......" At Summer's words, Winter glared at her like she'd grown bugs.
"Anyway, before it dies, the deer tells him there's a fairy bathing in a lake over there."
...Nod.
"So the woodcutter's like, 'Holy shit, I'm a 40-year-old virgin—what luck!' and heads off."
This was a live scene of video media ruining the Red Dragon's speech patterns.
......Nod.
"Gets there, and yep, fairy's naked bathing. But up close, it's no fairy. Just the ugly spinster from the next village. Dirty 'cause she doesn't wash. But hey, beggars can't be choosers—to the virgin woodcutter, skirt up and she's a fairy."
......
"Steals her clothes and bolts. Lures her out, kidnaps her easy. Turns out she's also a 40-year-old spinster, sparks fly. They click perfect! Night after night~~~. Ends up with like ten kids. Woodcutter's broke, borrows from his brother. Gets ladle-slapped by sister-in-law."
......
"Woodcutter's name? Heungbu."
......
The fairy tale of chaos and destruction ended thus.
"That's the story. First time hearing it, baby?"
His innocence shattered, Winter stared at her like a multi-legged bug.
Summer giggled inwardly.
He wriggled. He'd wanted to bolt earlier, but Summer hugged him tight, no escape.
"But there's a twist."
"...Not interested."
"Truth is, no hunter chased that deer."
"...Don't care."
"Deer was pissed the spinster dirtied its drinking pond, so it schemed big."
Wriggle wriggle.
"Ends up caught by the woodcutter, becomes her tonic soup. Hoisted by its own petard."
Wriggle wriggle.
"Today's lesson: Don't act tough if you're dumb......"
Winter headbutted Summer's chin with his occiput.
Crack!
"Ack! Ugh... Hey, Yoo Winter!"
Winter escaped her grasp and toddled to Yoo Ji-tae in the kitchen, whining. He jabbed a finger at Summer while explaining in garbled speech.
Seemed like "That guy's bad."
"Did he now."
Yoo Ji-tae hugged the whining Winter, who could barely talk straight, and patted him.
Only then did he calm.
Then glared at Summer.
"Pfft. Look at him scamper off. Total mutt."
Winter stuck out his tongue: bleeeh.
What a peaceful day.
Just chilly enough. Dry weather.
What to feed them on a day like this?
Lately, Winter had gotten really into food.
Used to eat whatever others did, now he'd shove flyers at Yoo Ji-tae: "Want this."
Better consult Autumn. She's the food expert.
As Yoo Ji-tae pondered,
The Apocalyptic Clock issued a warning.
Yoo Ji-tae's eyes narrowed.
Until now, the Apocalyptic Clock had only distinguished whether revealed phenomena were "Malice" from beyond Providence's horizon.
After incidents erupted. Too late.
But now was different.
A few days ago, this message had appeared:
Quite some time after shoving Hasaetbyeol and Guardian (named Armata, apparently) into the underground labyrinth.
Having collected every last trace of "Malice" from Hasaetbyeol, the Apocalyptic Clock could now pinpoint when Malice emerged.
In other words, he'd know the instant incidents happened.
So what was it?
30-Man Airborne Special Forces.
The name of a combat unit under the International Superhuman Federation.
Members, men and women alike, were all burly bruisers. Always at the vanguard in dungeon raids. Deployed for anti-terror ops too.
Unique trait: all positions were "front fighters." Meaning the whole unit was frontline tanks swinging weapons while eating hits.
Yoo Ji-tae had briefly been part of that 30-Man Airborne Special Forces in some early-to-mid regression loop.
Like elephants or rhinos as animals.
Bulldozers as machines.
A kid who idolized barbarians growing up. He joined the federation military brass and realized his fantasy.
That was the absurd origin of the unit.
A tale only the regressor knew.
Fine, all good, but.
How'd those guys get exposed to Malice?
As Yoo Ji-tae wondered, the Apocalyptic Clock popped a new status window.
Oh dear.
Seemed the materials he'd spread via WOO were the cause. Federation sniffed it out, sent folks investigating, and touched something wrong.
Luckily, not a big deal for Malice exposure.
"Mental Corruption" level was fine. Like being drugged—rage out, smash surroundings.
Problem was the targets: 30-Man Airborne Special Forces. If they rampaged for real, Hate Ling could crash.
Before his thoughts finished, a distant boom echoed.
KABOOM—
Summer and Winter didn't hear. Too faint, too far.
The regressor closed his eyes, calculated direction and distance.
About 8.5 km. Northwest Hate Ling. Outside Lair. Echo suggested underground. Some facility exploded.
His "Intuition" said no further damage yet.
Yoo Ji-tae stood.
Time to hurry.
Before things got noisy.