The First Time
The bath was very warm, as it was my first time, but for some reason my body felt cold. The atmosphere had instantly grown so heavy that it went beyond awkwardness and made it hard to breathe.
At my question, Reina opened her mouth with an extremely serious expression.
“No. Even if you betray me or try to escape… I still wouldn’t want to kill you.”
Her voice and tone carried the same cold edge she used with her subordinates, wrapping around me like a chill. Yet her red eyes looked at me with unmistakable sadness.
“If… really, if… an unavoidable situation truly comes… then I’ll have no choice but to stop you myself…”
“……”
Just like her sorrowful gaze, her words were complicated and difficult to accept. Did “stop” ultimately mean killing me?
Bringing me here and refusing to let me leave, all because she liked and loved me, was unreasonable. I hadn’t done anything wrong to begin with.
When my expression darkened, Reina continued while watching me.
“If my life were in danger, I wouldn’t be able to protect you, right? So I’d have no choice but to fight to keep you safe. And that would be a cruel, cold thing to do.”
“!?”
So in the end, it still led to hurting someone? A yandere story suddenly came to mind—one where the protagonist killed the person they loved to preserve them forever for eternal love. Her words matched that exactly.
“Yujin. Remember this one thing. I’ll do everything I can so that situation never happens. Because you… are precious to me!”
She squeezed my hand tightly so I wouldn’t be frightened, her eyes sincere as she laid bare her feelings.
But what if, without meaning to, I escaped because I wanted to set foot on my homeland again? What would happen then?
You never know what life will bring. Even though I knew I shouldn’t, I stubbornly pressed on.
“What if… that situation really does come? People can’t predict the future… What if something like a natural disaster happens?”
“Th-then… I’d have to defend myself. If the person I want to protect threatens me… I’d have no choice, for the sake of the organization… But if I die, like I said… I won’t be able to protect you…”
She seemed nervous too, her words stumbling. Yet she quickly continued, shouting that such a thing would absolutely never happen.
This strange feeling was the same. Even though it wasn’t what I wanted, emotions kept rising. Even though I wanted to leave, I found myself staying and listening to her. That only made me more afraid.
“Nuna… It’s a strange request, but… if… that time ever comes… could you at least make it painless? I’m scared of pain…”
Imagining something that might never happen, I barely managed to voice my fear through sobs.
Reina’s eyes widened in panic. She waved her hands frantically.
“No! No! That kind of thing will never happen! Why—why are you saying that!? Huh!?”
She pulled my crying self into her arms and stroked my hair. Her soaked bikini top pressed against my face, blocking my mouth and nose.
Reina sighed in defeat and spoke softly.
“…Yeah. If… if it really happens… I’ll make it as painless and quiet as possible. You won’t feel a thing…”
She patted my back comfortingly. For several minutes I used her chest like a handkerchief.
Once I had calmed a little, she pulled away and, still flustered, asked about my hobbies.
“I… like reading…”
“What!? Reading!? Wow! That’s so cool! Hehe, what kind of books do you like?”
She smiled brightly again, perhaps trying to lighten the mood. She pressed her chest against my arm once more, seeking closeness. I hesitated. Honestly, almost everything I read was manga—especially titles that were practically guaranteed to get anime adaptations. People usually teased me about being an otaku whenever I mentioned it.
“Hm? Yujin?”
“Um… well… the books I read are…”
While I was still debating whether to answer, a certain rom-com manga suddenly flashed through my mind—the scene where the male and female leads bathed together. It was a very explicit 19+ title, and the image kept overlapping with Reina right in front of me.
‘Hwaak! Wh-what am I thinking!? Get a grip!’
I shook my head without realizing it. Instead of backing off, she worried I might be sick and pressed even closer.
The result was immediate—down below, a tent formed again. When she glanced down and saw how much bigger it had gotten, her eyes widened like saucers.
“Yujin? Do you… want to do it?”
“Huh? N-no! Th-this is—!”
“You don’t have to hide it… Tell me honestly… Actually, I also…”
Reina slowly spread her legs and lifted the hem of her skirt. At first I didn’t understand, but then I noticed the white fabric was slightly darker, stained.
“N-nuna?”
“Look… I want it too… That’s why it’s wet… Just thinking about bathing with you… kept making me have naughty thoughts…”
Her eyes gradually grew unfocused, half-lidded. She gazed at me with a seductive look and gently pulled the bottom of her skirt aside.
After soaking so long, my body had no strength left. Before I knew it, Reina had climbed onto my lap. She reached down, spread herself, and guided my hardened length inside.
“N-nuna? Haheuk! Wh-why are you—! Haeueut!”
Startled, I tried to struggle, but her thighs pinned my lap firmly. I couldn’t understand why she was putting it there. Yet the intense stimulation kept building, and lewd sounds slipped out of me before I could stop them.
This was my first time, so everything she did left me confused. I had no idea what this act even was. Every time my erection pushed into the tight heat, overwhelming pleasure-pain shot through me. It wasn’t exactly pain, but the sensation was so intense my body kept twitching.
When I tried to pull away again, she grabbed my hand and forced it against her chest.
“Hueung, haheung. Yujinaa…”
“!?”
Her bikini top had slipped down, fully exposing her nipples. They were stiff, just like my own arousal.
“Haa… haa… Nuna… why are you doing this…? I’m… scared…”
“Yujin… don’t worry… This isn’t to hurt you…”
“Huh?”
“If you stay still… hueueuk… I’ll make sure it doesn’t hurt… okay?”
The unfamiliar ecstasy made me anxious. Was this punishment for what I’d said earlier? Was this her way of killing someone painlessly? The thought crossed my mind. But every time Reina moaned, my member grew even harder inside her. The warmth and the way her inner walls gradually tightened around me sent heat flooding through my body, forcing more shameful sounds from my throat.
“Haeueuk! N-nuna! Stop! Ah—something’s blocking the way! No more!”
There was a thin wall-like barrier. My length couldn’t go any deeper, and the surrounding flesh kept clenching, making my hips move on their own.
“No… This part is the most important… I can’t stop now… Hueueung, haheuk!”
“Nunaa! Haaang! Down there! My pepper feels weird! Nuaaa!”
I used the childish word because I didn’t know what else to call it. Reina only stroked my head and pulled me tighter against her.
“It’s not weird… Hueueung… It feels better and better, that’s all… don’t worry…”
Her sweet whisper made my struggling body gradually still. But the relentless tightening eventually made me try to back away again. When my back hit the wall, her red eyes suddenly turned cold—the same look she wore when giving orders as the syndicate boss.
“Stay still. If you don’t, I’ll make it harder. From now on, just answer what I say.”
“N-nuna? Hueueuk, haheuk… I’m scared…”
“I told you to answer. Keep struggling and I won’t let you go.”
“Hueueuk!”
Terrified, I went limp. My body stiffened and stopped moving. She praised me softly, stroked my hair, and began moving her hips while holding me close.
The beautiful silver-haired woman moaned as she rocked up and down. My mind filled with nothing but lewd thoughts. I’d never seen the real thing, only censored scenes in 19+ manga where the lower parts were blurred white. So I hadn’t understood what the act truly was—only that it felt naughty.
Before I realized it, my face was buried in Reina’s chest. All I could do was moan and pant. But just like when she’d used her mouth earlier, something was rising fast.
“J-just a moment! Nuna! Nuna! Stop! Something’s coming up! Nuna!”
“Haaang! It’s okay! Just cum inside nuna like this!”
“What!? Wh-what are you saying!? Nuna! Huaaang! No! It’s coming! Nooo! Haeueueueueuk!”
The overwhelming tightness pushed me over the edge. My body trembled violently as I spilled inside her. She shuddered too, clutching my head even tighter.
While I was still catching my breath against her chest, I noticed something red floating in the water below.
“Hiiik! Why is there blood!? N-nuna! Blood’s coming out from down there! D-did you get hurt!?”
Only then did I remember—her earlier moans had sounded more like pain than pleasure, and her eyes had been wet with tears. Worry flooded me.
“Hehe, are you worried about me now? Until just now you were scared and saying you didn’t like it~”
“That’s different! R-really, are you hurt? Th-then we need to treat it right away!”
I grabbed her hand to stand, but my length was still inside her. While I hesitated, she smiled gently.
“It’s normal for the first time. What was it called… the hymen tore, so there’s blood…”
“What!? H-hymen!?”
Even with my limited knowledge, I knew what a hymen was. But this was the first time I learned it could tear during sex. And since “virgin” meant first time… she had given hers to me.
“Nuna… I… what do you mean by that…”
“Ei, don’t cry. That’s how much I love you, Yujin. And I’m sorry for acting scary earlier… If I hadn’t, you might have gotten hurt against the wall behind us.”
“Huh?”
We were in the bath, and there really was a wall right behind me. Every time we moved, my back had hit it. So that was why she’d acted like the boss? Realizing I’d misunderstood, I apologized.
“It’s okay. I should have been gentler… I practiced fellatio by watching videos, but sex doesn’t seem to work the same way…”
“F-fellatio? Hiik! Videos!? What do you mean!?”
Even when I asked in shock, she only laughed and said such things existed. Then she whispered softly.
“This act is how we share love. Just think of it as an expression of affection. You love me too, Yujin. Otherwise, we wouldn’t be connected like this.”
“N-nuna?”
At those words, my face burned and I turned away. Yet Reina’s red eyes stayed fixed on me, unwavering.