The Only Fireworks in This World
Time seems to trickle by slowly, yet looking back, it has flown past astonishingly fast. Before I knew it, I was eight years old, and just as Duke Asis had once hinted, an invitation arrived for Lapis's birthday banquet.
My guess was that at this banquet, he would gather the nobles of the Neutral Faction and publicly announce my engagement to Lapis. If that happened, the entire Neutral Faction would officially stand behind me. The factions friendly to the current imperial household would no doubt find the prospect rather unsettling.
After all, the nobles of the border regions adjoining the Barren Lands were too distant from the capital to exert any real influence on the center of power. So they had carved out domains of their own and developed fiercely independent temperaments. But once this engagement was announced, and time passed, and I ascended the throne, there would be a real possibility of the Neutral Faction's nobles advancing into the heart of the capital — which would keep the others up nights with worry. Their rice bowls might very well be taken from them.
In fact, much of the territory belonging to the nobles who had joined the rebellion had already been annexed as direct holdings of the imperial family. If I set my mind to it, it would be no difficult thing, once I became Emperor, to grant titles to the descendants of the Neutral Faction's nobles and bring them into the capital's orbit. Those friendly to the current household had stood by in silence when my mother was executed, so they would watch my every move, convinced I would never look out for their interests.
'Though in practice, quite a lot of gifts did come my way.'
I was the only prince, so it was a foregone conclusion that I would be the next Emperor. That was why, at my eighth birthday, I'd received a considerable mountain of presents from the nobility. Noble houses with daughters had even been sending sly letters to my father, angling to bind them to me.
'Secretive, yes…… but it means the interest isn't exactly small.'
That was why Father asked whether I wouldn't like to hold a grand birthday banquet of my own, and I refused him on the spot. I had no desire, at this point, to stand before those people and respond one by one to their hypocritical facades. If they thought that because I was still young, I would move according to their wishes, they were gravely mistaken.
'He even worries my debut in high society is being delayed……'
I had no intention of it, save perhaps at my coming-of-age ceremony. 'Now, when was Aria's birthday, again?' Casting my mind back, I remembered that the day I forced the Empress's confession had been Aria's birthday. Which meant it wasn't far off. Had I really paid so little attention?
"Rohen? What is it?"
「 I wanted to know when my sister's birthday is. 」
"Aria's birthday? The same day as Lapis, Duke Asis's daughter."
「 Really? 」
"Yes."
「 I see. 」
I'd never heard that Aria shared a birthday with Lapis. To reach the Asis Duchy at a leisurely pace, we would need to depart at least fifteen days in advance — which meant, in effect, I wouldn't be present for her birthday at all. Our departure was set for three days from now, so I finished the day's tasks with a sour expression and returned to my room.
I used to arrive before Aria, but since I needed to reap the fruits of my training and advance by leaps and bounds, the order had reversed — now I always came in after her.
"Have you had dinner?"
Since I hadn't charged my words with the power of the Dragon Tongue at any point that day, I could speak with Aria freely. There were things I wanted to ask her, too.
"No."
"I'll bring something."
She could easily have eaten without me, but Aria made a habit of waiting. Even when I told her not to, that I'd be late.
Well — being looked at with contempt as the traitor's daughter was, honestly, stress every time she had to face it…… but perhaps there was another reason as well? So I sat down to the meal I'd brought and casually broached the subject. There had been a time when I brought her food because she was fasting and needed to be coaxed into eating at all, but now she ate fine on her own, and there was no longer any need for the trouble.
"Why are you asking me this now, out of nowhere? If it's such a bother, just leave me alone."
"……"
Her sharp reaction and curt answer caught me off guard; it had been a long time since I'd heard her speak that way.
"And you — what's your reason for staying beside the traitor's daughter like this?"
"I told you. I've never seen a person who truly wanted to be alone manage a proper life."
"So you're worried about me."
When I gave a silent nod, Aria let out a dry little laugh.
"Or are you just enjoying the view — watching up close while I struggle and flail on my own?"
"Winning arguments through provocation and fabrication isn't sound logic."
"……Everyone's the same. No matter how hard I try to change the way people look at me, they just sneer behind my back — what could the traitor's daughter possibly do? You're no different, are you? Standing there beside me while I scrape and claw, snickering to yourself inside."
"That's a hasty generalization."
"I know better now. About how terrible my mother and the people who joined her were — people never stop saying it. At first, my sin was being born a girl. Now, my sin is simply being alive."
At those words, I took a moment to gather my thoughts before speaking.
"I told you — the two things are separate."
"If they were separate, people wouldn't look at me the way they do."
"The world you've experienced is still only the imperial palace. The world is wide, and there are so many people in it."
"What good is wide? How many people do you think don't know I'm the traitor's daughter?"
……Truthfully, almost none. She wasn't wrong there.
"Whatever I do, they just want to watch me run into a wall and break down."
"……"
"I'm the daughter of the woman who killed your mother. Do you honestly believe anyone could ever see me as independent — I, who carry that blood in its entirety?"
Aria abandoned the meal she'd been pushing around her plate and rose from her seat, coming toward me.
"It's too hard now…… Can't you just, let me kill myself? A year isn't a short time. I've done what I could, but there isn't the slightest sign of anything changing."
"……"
"It'd be a relief for you too, wouldn't it, if the traitor's daughter died. No trouble would come of it. None at all!"
Her small hands, clutching my collar, were trembling violently. That was how cruel a brand the traitor's daughter truly was for her.
But I felt nothing toward her. I knew she bore no guilt whatsoever. The knots of that affair had already been tied shut. Even if she died now, the emotions I felt would not change by a hair's breadth. I was hardly so childish in spirit as to take my resentment out on her, nor did I hate her enough to feel any triumph at the sight of her corpse.
Really, watching her, hers was a wretched fate. She had wanted to be happy, but because she was born a girl, her own mother scorned her. Just when happiness seemed within reach, she was branded the traitor's daughter.
I had felt pity and sympathy for her, and that was why I'd given her some measure of attention — but that attention was, from start to finish, only the hope that once she reasonably accepted the truth of events, she would cast off her warped feelings toward me and go her own way in peace. But the result was this. It troubled me, too.
"I heard your birthday is coming."
"So what?"
Wearing an expression that demanded what of it, Aria seized my hand and strode toward the window.
"Planning to shove me out and kill me?"
"The prohibition on harming me — I'll lift it."
"What are you thinking?"
Instead of answering, I cast Spectral Water-Moon toward the open window. At once the ordinary scenery dissolved, and what emerged was a beautiful night sea, cool and limpid. The gentle wash of the waves and the sea mirroring the night sky made it look as though jewels lay submerged beneath its surface.
"As an early birthday gift — let me show you a present."
"……Don't waste your effort on pointless things."
I issued a command to force her reluctant gaze out the window, then gave my fingers a light flick. Beyond the horizon, a dozen shafts of light surged upward and began splashing multicolored paint across the star-stitched night sky.
In this world, where gunpowder did not yet exist, this was the only fireworks display that Spectral Water-Moon could provide. Perhaps that was why, even after I withdrew my command, Aria's gaze remained utterly captivated by the brilliance painting the night sky.
"The day you want to die, come find me anywhere crowded and cast a spell at me."
"……"
"I'll see that proper procedure is followed."
It would sit lighter on my conscience, too, that way.
"This world still holds so much you haven't experienced. Have you ever seen a sight like this? First you lived a life fixated on your mother's gaze, desperate for the Empress's love — and now you live a life fixated on the world's gaze, as the traitor's daughter. Nowhere, not once, have you tried to lead a life on your own terms. Of course…… humans are social creatures; I won't claim you could ignore that entirely. But doesn't it make you furious? Doesn't it feel unjust?"
"……"
"Keep living, and there will be people who see you simply as Aria — not as the traitor's daughter. Your magical talent, your beauty — the charms you carry are more than enough to wipe away that prejudice entirely. And as I said — if you truly reach the point where you want to give everything up, I'll draw the period at the end of that sentence myself. So let yourself be fooled a little longer, and take a few more steps forward."
Against the backdrop of the night sky, the sight of beautiful paint layered upon paint was impossible to look away from. And each of Rohen's words fell like a sweet whisper.
When had Rohen ever seen a sight so beautiful? Why was the world he knew so different from the world she knew?
Just as he'd said, a slow-burning sense of injustice began to smolder upward, and Aria clenched her fists tight. Yes — now she even had the means to end her own life whenever she chose. So until then, she might as well live in a way that left no regrets behind. At first, hatred had driven her. Now it was indignation. Rohen kept supplying her life with reasons to go on.
Who knew a lifeline could be this stubbornly tough?
"Same as ever…… the absolute worst."
Hmph.
After watching the fireworks to their very end, she left Rohen behind as he closed the window, walked to her bed, and lay down. Tonight, for some reason, even without Mary's illusion, she was able to surrender herself comfortably to that unpleasant hand of Rohen's — the one stroking her hair at her side — and drift off to sleep.