How Shameless, Saint (3)
After Kim Isabel's devoted hands had seen to the cleanup as well, I went about gathering my clothes, still pretending to be embarrassed.
"……"
"……"
Kim Isabel kept sneaking glances at me, and I matched her by putting on a sheepish expression of my own. Even without a word being spoken, I could vaguely sense what she was feeling.
And the largest part of it, no doubt, was guilt.
Once I'd hastily pulled my clothes back on from where they'd puddled on the floor, I carefully broached the subject of what had just happened.
"Hey, Isabel."
"Y-Yes!"
"...Did it help? Getting used to a man's body."
"O-Of course! Th-Thanks to you, Sunho, I feel like I understand men so much better now! And... and that they're not something to be feared so terribly after all..."
"Good. I'm glad my body could be of use, at least."
"……"
I had deliberately chosen phrasing designed to prick at her guilt, making sure Kim Isabel was watching my reaction — so now it was my turn to press on to the next step.
"So... about the next round of training."
"...Yes."
"Me touching your body like last time is..."
"……"
"...pr-probably too much, right? I know it's training, but having another man touch your chest has to be a little much."
"N-No, it isn't!"
"...Hm?"
"No, I... th-that is, just now..."
Startled by her own outburst, Kim Isabel shook her head in a fluster. The way she jumped at the sound of her own voice was honestly adorable. So she'd liked being touched last time that much, had she?
"If it were a different man, it might be too much, but... i-if it's you, Sunho, it's fine..."
"...Is that so?"
"Yes. So please, I would be grateful if you would continue helping me grow accustomed to a man's touch, just as you did before..."
When it came down to it, all she really wanted was to feel that orgasm from last time one more time.
Still, I couldn't say I disliked the sight of her trying to use her androphobia treatment as an excuse to get handsy with me.
Especially since, after I'd pretended to demur, the breasts she had once offered up as an act of 'apology' were now being offered up as a 'request'.
In other words, this meant that from now on, touching Kim Isabel's chest during training would no longer chip away at the guilt or sense of indebtedness she'd built up toward me.
Which also meant I was free to redirect that cost toward something else entirely.
"Well, if you're okay with it, Isabel, I don't mind either."
"Th-Then you simply must do it! I even touched your, um, your... thing, directly, so doesn't it only make sense that you, Sunho, should touch my breasts as well...?"
"...Don't think of it that way. Let's just call it training, Isabel. You don't need to frame every relationship in terms of debts and favors."
"...I suppose that's, true."
While maintaining the most gentlemanly demeanor I could manage, I kept reassuring her that my purpose was truly to help with her treatment, and that I had no ulterior motives whatsoever.
Not that I ever let a hint of reluctance show, of course.
"Then... shall we pick up where we left off with last time's 'training'?"
"...Yes."
"Come sit over here, then. Facing each other just works better for this sort of thing."
"Th-That's true."
Unable to hide how wound up she was, Kim Isabel carefully made her way over to the seat I had prepared. Her soft body lowered gently onto the chair.
...And so, once again, today it came to this.
Training where Sunho touches... my chest with his hands.
If I'm being honest, it's still a little overwhelming.
Sunho may be the one doing it, but... having my chest touched is still the sort of thing that leaves me nervous, no matter what.
'But I have to do this.'
If I want to grow accustomed to men even a little faster, this much is simply what has to be done.
Only by learning that a man's hands aren't something frightening can I build up any immunity to men at all.
Sunho is the man I trust most in this world... so if it must be done, then obviously it's right to ask it of him.
...It is absolutely, absolutely not because I liked the feeling of Sunho's hands and wanted to do it again.
"Then, let's begin."
"...Yes."
Still, it has been a while, so my heart does flutter a little.
We haven't been able to meet since the semester began, so this is the first training in nearly ten days.
Truthfully, I may have tried once or twice to recreate that same feeling by myself... but not once did it ever feel as good as when Sunho first touched me.
Of course, it only felt that way because it was my first time and I wasn't used to it yet — this time might not feel as wonderful as that first moment did, but...
-Rub.
"Nnh..."
...It seems my worries were for nothing.
Aside from the fleeting brushes during our self-defense lessons, it had been nearly ten days since I'd been touched like this — and for it to feel this good... perhaps there really is some special connection between Sunho and me.
There's no other explanation. Merely having a hand touch my chest shouldn't feel this wonderful — it defies sense...
-Rub, rub.
"Haa, haa... nngh..."
...He has only just laid his hand carefully over my chest, and yet everything feels so terribly sensitive.
My clothes and underwear shift along with his fingers, giving the sensation of being gently rubbed against the nipple hidden beneath.
Then, at some point, he brought his fingertips to the center of my chest and began circling them slowly, teasing me.
"Ah, haa... hnnnn..."
Against that shameless touch, lewd sounds keep spilling out of me before I can stop them.
The subtle friction between my underwear and my nipples is growing sharper and sharper against my skin.
Truly... Sunho's hands feel the best of anyone's. He's only touching me through my clothes, and still it feels this good.
"Isabel."
"Y-Yeseh...!"
"The fabric feels a bit thinner than last time, somehow. Did you skip the tights today?"
"Y-Yeseh... i-it's gotten warmer out, so, I didn't think I needed to dress so heavily anymore..."
If I explain that I deliberately chose thinner clothes in case something like this might happen... will he despise me for it?
It is true that the weather has been warming, at least. I didn't tell a single lie.
"Makes sense. No wonder you seem even more sensitive than last time."
"Nnh, yeseh..."
Did he say that because he's mistaken — believing I undressed this way in order to feel his hands in finer detail?
Or... is he pleased because it lets him touch my breasts more sensitively?
I couldn't know his heart, but thanks to the sound of Sunho's voice, my fluttering heart seemed to settle a little all the same.
'But when I touch myself alone, it's never felt this good...'
And when I do it alone... I don't just touch over my clothes. I touch directly, skin to skin.
But... what would it feel like if Sunho were allowed to touch my chest directly?
...Just being touched over my clothes like this feels so good it's making me dizzy. If he touched me bare beneath the fabric, I don't know that I could bear it.
'But today, Sunho...'
He held back his own shame and let me touch that... thing of his directly.
Shouldn't I match him in kind — at the very least, let him touch my chest directly too?
Even in the midst of such thoughts, Sunho's hands never stopped, closing in tighter and tighter around my chest.
-Squeeze!
"Nnh, hah...!!"
He grabbed my breasts in both hands like a little child and kneaded them hard.
-Pinch.
"Hnnngh, aahng...!"
He pressed his fingertips lightly against the spots where my nipples pressed through, teasing them with a pinch.
-Rub, rub.
"Hnnh, hnn... nnh..."
And after that, he returned to stroking me softly, easing me back into that first gentle, pleasant stimulation.
My body, startled by the lewd sensations, kept bucking and responding all on its own... and that was embarrassing in its own right.
...That same strange feeling from last time was gathering again, deep in my body.
-Rub, rub.
"Nnh, hnn, Sunho, si—..."
"……"
-Squeeze!
"Nnngh, w-wait a... a little slow, er..."
"……"
...What do I do? I don't think he can hear me.
He's far too focused on touching my chest — there's no doubt in my mind that my voice simply isn't reaching him.
But if this goes on, I'm going to make a mess of myself in front of Sunho again, just like a little child, just like last time...
Should I pull away and tell him? Or simply endure it, and like last time...
'It's not as though I haven't already shown him that embarrassing side of myself once.'
Showing him the same thing a second time wouldn't make him think strangely of me, would it?
Last time, he even told me it was a perfectly natural reaction, so it was nothing to be ashamed of.
And he's working so hard to touch me — it would feel wrong to interrupt him over nothing.
'Besides, I've seen Sunho's embarrassing side once, too...'
So showing him mine as well would only be 'fair', in a way.
It's purely for that reason. That's all.
It is absolutely not because his touch feels so good that I don't want to pull away.
The brush of fingertips grazing the peaks of my chest. The soft, enveloping pressure of his palms closing around me... Just as those overwhelming sensations had swept across my breasts several times over, at some unguarded moment —
...The stimulation came, sudden and without warning.
-Pinch.
"N—nnnnngghh?!"
His index and middle fingers — four fingers between his two hands — closed precisely on both of my nipples at once.
And then, holding that grip, he pressed and teased the peaks of my nipples right through the fabric.
Even with two layers of cloth between us, my body reacted to it on pure reflex, and almost immediately I felt something begin to smolder and climb from the very depths of me.
"Haa, hnn, hnnnnnggh...!!"
...It was my chest being touched, so why did it feel as though electricity was coursing through my entire body?
My thighs trembled on their own, and I felt my lower stomach clench tight.
Yet even so, Sunho's hands did not stop — if anything, they pressed deeper, softer, more relentless, boring into my chest.
Through the fabric dampened with my sweat, the sensation came through sharper and clearer than before.
...And then, drowning in that irresistible, exquisite pleasure, my body was once more swept under by the feeling of my limits giving way.
-Splash...!
"A—aaah, aahnnngghh...!!"
My whole body convulsed violently as moans spilled out of me again and again, breaking apart at the edges.
Hot liquid I could no longer hold back poured downward, in an instant soaking through my underwear and the hem of my dress.
My clutching fingertips shook; my hips jerked.
I could feel something warm overflowing through the thin fabric — the sensation of wet cloth clinging to my skin, vivid and unmistakable.
-Slump.
"Haa, haanh...! Hnngh, hnn..."
"W-Wait, Isabel! Are you okay?!"
As my body pitched forward, Sunho caught me in his arms, urgency in his voice.
...Though the liquid still flowing from below was more than he could entirely catch.
'I knew it. In the end, it always comes to this...'
I'd sensed it dimly ever since Sunho's hands first touched my chest, after all.
...But having expected it did nothing, it seems, to lessen the shame.
(A version of the illustration above without the veil)