Chapter 227: Between Illegal and Expedient
Translator: RaidenTL
Chapter 227: Between Illegal and Expedient
“Everyone, line up straight! Shoulders back!”
The female guides were so overbearing it made me wonder if this was actually a government institution.
“Can’t you see the line?! Get back behind it! Huh?!”
“I-I’m sorry…”
A man who looked like an adult hunched his shoulders in fear at the threatening woman.
“Ugh, seriously…! Don’t drag out your words!”
“S-Sorry…”
The man looked like he was on the verge of tears.
I started to get confused. Had I walked into a boot camp for new recruits, or was I at a mandatory male-only physical examination center for social services?
“You! What are you doing?! Your number hasn’t been called yet, so why are you standing up?!”
“T-The bathroom…”
“Oh, really? I’ll take you there myself.”
With a greasy smile, she pressed herself against the man who wanted to go to the bathroom and practically dragged him away by the wrist. I was speechless.
I missed Cassia.
Because of the rule that guardians had to wait in a different building, that stupid-pushover black cow witch sister was currently in the next building over, playing arcade games with some random women. I was starting to resent her for it.
Since there were quite a few people ahead of me, I was forced to keep watching this uncomfortable spectacle.
I felt a sense of camaraderie with the others as fellow men and wanted to strike up a conversation, but seeing them all fidgeting like dogs that needed to poop, it wasn't easy to speak to them.
Since all electronic devices had been confiscated (?), there was nothing to do. I sat there with my back straight, waiting for my turn, trying to look like a good, cute, adorable, and handsome boy to the masses.
“Does our little friend here need to go to the bathroom~?”
A few minutes passed. A woman with wolf ears wearing a doctor’s gown spoke to me kindly.
“No, I’m fine.”
“Did I scare you by talking to you so suddenly? Sorry, sorry. All the big brothers who come here are so nervous, so it’s natural for a little friend like you to be scared too. Right~?”
Rather than being scared, I was actually grinding my teeth, thinking that if there were a national petition system, I’d be filing complaints like crazy. But there was no need to tell her that.
It was hard to tell the difference between dog and wolf beastkin since they looked similar, but seeing the wild glint in her eyes, she seemed to be a wolf.
“It’s okay. It’s just a physical exam.”
“Hehe, how mature. This is your first time, right?”
“Yes.”
The woman, who kept pestering me with questions, let out a smirk. She then glared at the man sitting next to me.
“Trash, move.”
“...M-My apologies.”
Despite being called trash, the frail-looking man stood up awkwardly, and the black wolf woman took his seat as if it were the most natural thing in the world.
“What are you looking at? Do you have something to say?”
“O-Oh, no…”
Back in my previous life, having your seat taken on the subway was a common occurrence, but I’d never seen it extorted like this. My fellow man seemed to have lost his mind from the absurdity; he didn't say another word and fled to a seat far away.
“How old is our little friend?”
“It’s a secret.”
“Hehe, you’re funny. Yeah, really funny.”
The woman in the suit, who was watching me with her chin resting on her hand propped on the armrest, let out a small laugh.
“Ah, I’m not a dangerous person. I’m a doctor. A doctor. I supervise the attending physicians here.”
Seeing her pull a card out of her gown’s front pocket and wave it at me, it didn't seem like she was lying.
More importantly, I was someone whose habit was to be loyal to power and work my dick off for pretty women with money and influence. I turned off my 'indifference mode' and took a closer look at the doctor sitting next to me.
She had black hair that reached down to her waist and yellow eyes. For some reason, she gave off the vibe of a wolf that would pounce on you in a quiet forest.
She looked strong-willed—the kind of doctor who looked like she’d enjoy tormenting a man by repeatedly picking him up and dropping him.
“Hello, I’m Jeong Yong-hwan. What is your name?”
“Oh… My name is Arisa. Arisa Dakal. Nice to meet you, little friend.”
Arisa. I repeated it in my head; it was a pretty nice name.
I had been on guard, thinking she might be a total pervert after seeing her try to take someone to the bathroom, but maybe I was overreacting. Then again, considering my homeroom teacher Lee Ji-yeon was a crazy bitch who used to watch me pee in the bathroom, I had every right to be!
“Ugh… why does it have to be the holdovers or the newbies?”
“At least it’s not a garbage-tier scrap.”
A group of women walked past, grumbling loudly. When they saw Arisa sitting next to me, they bowed their heads and hurried away.
The scent of power was getting very strong.
Arisa’s gaze as she poked my cheek and evaluated me wasn't exactly pleasant, but as someone whose brain was attached to his dick and who always enjoyed attention from a pretty lady, I decided to play along to kill some time.
“Are you scared of the big sisters?”
“Is there a reason to be scared? Everyone is so nice.”
“Huh? Haha, right. Right. I guess if you’re this cute, people can’t help but be nice to you.”
The wolf woman ruffled my hair roughly. Seeing how she handled someone else’s child so carelessly, it seemed this wolf doctor hadn't received much home education.
“Isn't it boring to wait? I know a way to get your exam done faster. Want to follow me?”
“Yes!”
I felt like I might be subjected to some sexual harassment, but having my butt or my giant Armstrong Cannon touched was a daily occurrence, so I didn't really care.
Though, if the harassment went beyond a little 'wiener-massaging,' I’d throw a fit immediately!
“Oh~?”
When I agreed instantly, Arisa Dakal’s eyes widened in surprise. She nodded and led me straight into the building.
To be honest, I was secretly hoping for some steamy 'Doctor, my wiener got too big and it hurts~' roleplay with the doctor, but...
“Hmm, height and weight… well, you need to exercise more. No, wait, did you exercise too much? You’re quite heavy compared to your body fat. Your muscle mass is decent too… I wonder where all this weight is coming from.”
After standing on a strange machine for a moment and stepping off, a ridiculously long strip of paper began to print. The doctor gave a brief evaluation and tore off the sheet.
“Alright, now for the interview evaluation.”
“Is that it…?”
“Yes, it’s a high-end machine. It’s only used for superior seeds, so we don’t get to run it often.”
The wolf woman lightly tapped the machine, which looked somewhat like a coffin.
“Yong-hwan, what do you want to be when you grow up?”
“I’m still thinking. There are so many things I want to do!”
“That’s not very manly. Hehe, but okay. I would’ve been disappointed if I heard an answer like 'househusband.'”
Arisa Dakal began walking at a very brisk pace, and I followed behind her, though she showed absolutely no consideration for my stride.
Just as I was wondering if we had walked in a circle, Arisa stopped in front of a door.
“Now, now, let’s go in. Yong-hwan?”
The force of the doctor pushing my back was unexpectedly strong.
It almost hurt.
But since I was used to taking punches and attacks stronger than this at the fitness center, I walked into the room without much thought.
I expected to see a bed, but instead, there were several women sitting in chairs, looking bored and fiddling with their phones.
Contrary to the advertisements claiming that male physical examination centers were strictly off-limits to electronic devices to prevent illegal filming, these women were using their phones to their hearts' content.
“Judges, I’ve brought an interesting boy. Why don’t you give him an ‘interview’?”
“We’re busy…”
One of the judges, who was about to grumble in annoyance, locked eyes with me. Despite the subtle silence that fell over the room, they all kept fiddling with their phones as if they didn't care.
“...Ahem, let’s begin the interview.”
She was a woman honest with her desires.
“What kind of interview… we need unanimous consent…”
An elf auntie sitting right next to her started to object strictly, but she shut her mouth the moment she saw me.
“Are the documents ready?”
“Ah, I brought them.”
Arisa Dakal casually waved a half-folded piece of paper from her pocket.
They all began whispering as they looked at the paper Arisa brought, as if they had found a major topic for debate.
“...He’s tall for his age, and looking at his projected height… his physical evaluation is at least an A+.”
“Look at this muscle mass. It looks like he’s been exercising consistently. Based on the muscle density and wave patterns, he’s doing a variety of training.”
“It looks like he’s being managed at a family level. He doesn't seem like a kid from an ordinary home. Where are the family relation documents?”
“I entered it here… It’s the Degrain family.”
A brief silence hung in the air.
“I guess blood doesn't lie, even in a male.”
“Is it okay for us to evaluate this? Shouldn't we mark him as a holdover? We should get permission from Lady Rune first…”
“Wait, his mana levels are abnormal. Is this right? He’s practically an Archmage.”
“It’s possible if they feed him elixirs like water. It is the Degrain family, after all.”
“If it were a girl, I’d understand, but he’s a boy.”
“Maybe Lady Rune saved him. Think about how pretty he must be. He’s her grandson.”
“Why did he even come for an exam? Don’t they usually just pay the fine and hide the kid?”
Hearing my grandmother’s name mentioned, it seemed things would have gone smoothly even if I hadn't leeched off power.
Rather than focusing on me, the women—who looked to be somewhere between 'big sister' and 'auntie'—were busy analyzing the data. I took the opportunity to look at their butts.
In this world, because women’s stats were blessed, they were basically all beautiful, so it wasn't a bad view.
I thought it might be nice to have an orgy with my mom and her friends later.
“Don’t worry, those sisters are just whispering because our Yong-hwan is so amazing.”
“Ah, yes…”
Was she trying to reassure me? Dakal, who had crouched down beside me, grabbed my shoulder and whispered tenderly.
“Everything that happens from now on is part of the ‘examination.’ Don’t think it’s strange, okay?”
“...Yes.”
I couldn't help but feel a bit nervous at Dakal’s subtly suggestive words.
Meanwhile, the women on the other side were raising their voices in an argument.
“If he has elf blood mixed in, he’s bound to have a pencil dick anyway. Is there even a point in making him strip? Let’s just give him an F for appearances.”
“Hey, what did you say? What about our elves?!”
“Calm down, calm down. I think tiny wieners are c-cute too…”
“What a waste. If it weren't for the elf blood, I would’ve checked it out like a lottery ticket.”
“Hey! Have you seen it?! Have you?! What about our elves?!”
The chaotic conversation continued.
“If the exam is over, can I go now?”
“Do you want to keep watching those sisters fight?”
“Yes, it’s fun.”
Arisa whipped her head around and looked at me with wide eyes.
Watching crazy bitches act out was great entertainment, but apparently, I had failed to meet the 'sensitivity' standards of this primitive world.
“...I’m joking.”
“You startled me. Well then, for a proper examination, Yong-hwan… let’s start by taking off your pants.”
Excuse me? What did you say?
“Didn't the machine measure everything?”
“Ahem, because of important circumstances, that kind of information can’t be gathered by a machine, so we have to measure it manually.”
No matter how I looked at it, this seemed like data that would never make it into an official profile.
“It’s a ‘natural’ thing that all the other ‘big brothers’ do. It’s sensitive data, so it’s only kept here at our institution.”
Looking at the way things were going, this 'manual measurement' was clearly illegal, but they were turning it into a database to be used for something 'important' elsewhere.
I finally understood why men were terrified every time they had to come back to the physical examination center for re-measurement.
However, I was very confident in this particular area.
“Now, now, big sister will help you take them off. Just stay still.”
“W-Wait a second…!”
I felt like I was going to get an erection. I was trying my best to hold it back, but being exposed in a situation like this was bound to cause a shameless boner.
Resistance seemed futile against Arisa’s aggressive attempt to pull down my pants. I pretended to twist my waist by accident and released the strength I was using to block her hands.
Snap!
“Ugh…! Wha—what…! You didn't have to hit me…”
Arisa, who was glaring at me with a scowl thinking I had slapped her hand away, couldn't finish her sentence.
“Wow… ah… wow…”
Because her IQ had plummeted into the double digits the moment she saw the massive penis, already half-hard and forming a thick arch.