When Humans Feel True Fear
When do humans feel fear?
Is it when their lives are threatened? When they confront their trauma? There are many possibilities, but one of them is when they face an unknown world they know nothing about. Much like the fear of death that comes from not knowing what happens after you die.
That strange demon I encountered in a remote village on the edge of the Kashmir territory. From that moment, the tension had begun to rise. It meant there was now room for the Demon King’s army to get involved in this journey.
That’s why, even though I thought I was dead when I was kidnapped right before going to bed, it made sense. The demon that had been hiding its presence had left a warning—“Just you wait”—before fleeing, so I naturally assumed it was launching an attack.
But.
“Shin-nim, are you alright? Why aren’t you answering?”
The fox girls I could see before me all looked different, yet their perked-up ears and swaying tails were identical to Akasha’s. Which meant they were all beastmen. Maybe that’s why I felt a little relieved. They didn’t seem like they wanted to hurt me right away.
“Reina, didn’t you act too roughly when you went to bring Shin-nim? He looks really startled!”
The beastgirl who had shoved her face right in front of me turned around and shouted. The one who reacted was the cat beastgirl who had been fiercely sharpening her claws. She had been trimming them to a razor edge, as if threatening someone.
“Th-that’s not true! How could I possibly… to Shin-nim…!”
Contrary to her appearance, she shyly protested her innocence.
“But… knowing you, Reina, it’s totally possible, isn’t it? Just look at how you always behave… See? You’re sharpening your nails right in front of Shin-nim again. What a rude, stupid cat.”
“Tsk.”
The cat beastgirl clicked her tongue and turned her head away.
Besides them, there were all kinds of other beastmen in front of me. Akasha was a fox beastgirl, but it seemed there were far more varieties than I’d imagined. A lion beastgirl with an expressionless face had been quietly staring at me the whole time. Her lion-mane-like hair and the thorn-like tattoos covering the area around her navel were striking.
There was also a massive bear beastgirl. The paw-print pattern on her palm stood out noticeably.
“Shin-nim, did you get hurt on the way here? If you did, please tell me comfortably. I’ll give that rude Reina a good scolding.”
The beastgirl who had been speaking to me from the start was also a fox beastgirl like Akasha, but her striking white hair caught the eye. A nine-tailed fox?
Her sharply upturned eyes, seductive smile, and the multiple tails visible behind her hips. One, two, three, four… nine. She was unmistakably a nine-tailed fox.
“I-I’m… fine.”
It was clear they were being friendly, but because my body was still tense, a wary tone slipped out.
“See? Even Shin-nim says he’s fine. You damn chieftain hag. Stop making a fuss over nothing.”
“Kumakuma, please take Reina away.”
At the nine-tailed fox beastgirl’s command, the bear beastgirl stood up. She then silently lifted the cat beastgirl, Reina, into the air.
“Why! Why! What did I do this time!”
“Because you dared to insult the chieftain. And… because it’s fun? Hehe.”
“You crazy psycho bitch! How is someone like you the chieftain! Fuck! The world really has gone to shit!”
She struggled desperately, but it was no use. She was simply dragged away, screaming in rage.
Once the commotion died down, the nine-tailed fox beastgirl extended her hand to me.
“Aren’t you hungry? How about we start with a meal?”
Gurgle—
My stomach reacted like magic to the word “meal.” I had no idea what time it was, but my stomach was screaming for food so loudly that I took the nine-tailed fox’s hand.
Then she spoke.
“Oh my, I’m late with introductions. I am Yuho. I am the Great Chieftain who leads all the beastmen.”
You have met the Great Chieftain of the Beastmen, Yuho.
When I came to my senses and stepped out of the room, what I saw was a dark cave. That raised a question.
Wasn’t this supposed to be the Great Forest?
A forest thick with grass and trees, surrounded by mountains. The Goshura Great Forest, where the whole world seemed covered in green—how did I suddenly end up in a gloomy cave? It was a damp place where not a single ray of light entered.
“It’s difficult to explain the exact location, but this place is somewhere underground in the Goshura Great Forest.”
Yuho smiled gently as she explained after I looked around for a moment.
“It is a hiding place we retreated to in order to escape the Holy Church. It’s more comfortable than it looks.”
The air felt suffocating with all sides blocked off, and she called this comfortable? Of course the cave was huge, so it felt open, but the lack of sunlight still made it gloomy.
I slowly followed behind Yuho. Had they used cement? Neatly built small houses were clustered together.
“Wow—!”
“Over here!”
Young beastmen children were running around. The kids scampered about with pure joy. Just watching them naturally brought a smile to my face.
But there was one thing that bothered me.
“That tattoo is a curse spread by the Holy Church. Unfortunately, there is currently no way to remove it.”
Every single one of them—adults and children alike—had thorn-like tattoos. The size varied, but the marks wrapped around their necks, arms, and legs like shackles.
I nodded at Yuho’s explanation. The reason I had come here was at Akasha’s request, to heal those very marks.
And after so long, I was excited to unleash a full barrage of healing magic.
“A human man? Ah! Could that be the Shin-nim the chieftain mentioned?”
“What? Shin-nim?!”
“Ooh! It really is Shin-nim!!”
All eyes turned to me. They began making a huge fuss, which reminded me of the guards in the last village who had gotten excited upon seeing me. Akasha always followed me around calling me Shin-nim, Shin-nim. Suddenly I missed her.
I waved my hand while thinking of her.
“Shin-nim waved at us!”
“Oh my god! As expected of Shin-nim! Damn, I believed in you!”
But these people were a bit much.
“Shin-nim is walking!”
“O-oh my god! As expected of Shin-nim!”
They were even amazed by the simple act of breathing. The burdensome stares made me turn with Yuho, only to hear another exclamation.
“Shin-nim turned around! He’s walking with the chieftain!”
“As expected!!”
Now I could only let out a hollow laugh.
“This is burdensome.”
“They are people who, like me, have waited a very long time for Shin-nim. Of course, I feel the same way they do.”
The same way? Did that mean she planned to be shocked by my every single movement like they were?
“Shin-nim is speaking!”
“Holy shit!”
The interest and gazes were so intense it felt like if I pulled down my pants and took a dump right here, they would applaud and cheer.
“Please don’t mind them and have your meal first. I have so many things I want to tell you. Hehe.”
I agreed with Yuho. My thoughts had gotten complicated, but food came first. When you’re hungry, you get irritable and can’t do anything properly.
“Fresh vegetables and fruits. Of course, meat has been prepared as well, so please enjoy as much as you like.”
It seemed they had paid careful attention to the food. I started walking with slightly lighter steps at the thought of eating, when suddenly—
“Ugh… Aaaah—!”
A scream pierced my ears. It was a sorrowful, painful cry.
Even Yuho, who had been leading the way, stopped and looked for the source of the scream, but soon turned back around.
“I’m sorry, but… please pretend you didn’t hear that.”
“Why?”
The one writhing in pain was a small girl. The little child who had been running around happily with light steps just moments ago was now clutching her throat, foaming at the mouth, and struggling.
And she wanted me to ignore a child like that?
“It is the activation of the Church’s curse. It turns beastmen into demonic beasts, and if they resist, it drives them mad and kills them…”
“Curse…?”
It reminded me of when I first met Akasha. She had explained it back then too. She had clearly said the curse turned beastmen into demonic beasts.
“We have no other choice. Once they become demonic beasts, they are either quietly killed for the sake of the clan… or they thrash in agony until they die…”
Yuho’s expression, which had been bright just moments ago, hardened in an instant. She lowered her gaze and took deep breaths, seemingly trying to control her emotions.
“Besides, since the concept of healers does not exist among us, we have neither the power to cure that curse nor the power to ease the pain. That is why, once the curse activates, we must choose death. Ria, I’m sorry, but may I ask you to handle this?”
“Yes.”
At Yuho’s request, the lion beastgirl began walking toward the girl. She extended her large claws and pointed them at the girl.
“Stop—!”
I stopped the lion beastgirl. It was clearly an act of taking a life. I knelt down in front of the girl to get a better look at her.
“She looks really bad.”
I wasn’t a doctor who could diagnose curses or find solutions just by looking at symptoms. But seeing the veins bulging all over her body and her skin rotting away in real time, I could clearly tell how serious it was.
“Heal—!”
I cast the magic without hesitation. The reason I had come all the way to the Goshura Great Forest was to keep my promise to Akasha and spam magic.
“Ugh… Haa…”
The girl’s pained expression quickly relaxed. The rotting skin became smooth again, and the bulging veins subsided. Even the tattoo that had wrapped around her body disappeared.
Complete recovery. I had poured the magic generously because her condition looked critical, and it seemed to have taken effect quickly.
“Th-thank you!”
“Shin-nim! Hooray!”
“We!!! We’re saved!! Now we don’t have to die!!”
“Shin-nim…!!!”
Everyone around us jumped in surprise at the sight of the fully healed girl and burst into cheers of praise directed at me.
“Thank you so much, Shin-nim.”
Yuho also approached me, bowed her head, and thanked me. Very politely.
“It was nothing.”
“No, it is not nothing at all. The miracle of healing is something only Shin-nim can perform. None of our clan can do what you just did.”
“You don’t have any healers?”
“That’s right.”
Yuho’s words were shocking. No healers at all.
Listening to her explanation, I learned the truth. Healing was originally a blessing bestowed by the gods. Even what the Church called healing was performed by borrowing the power of their sole god. In other words, because the beastmen had no gods, there was no one among them who could perform such acts. That was why they had desperately longed for a god.
“I see…”
Hearing the story made me feel something different. I still didn’t know whether I was truly the god they spoke of, but perhaps because they kept calling me Shin-nim, I felt an enormous sense of responsibility.
“Thank you from the bottom of my heart for showing us this miracle.”
After receiving her thanks once more, we moved to have our meal.
The meal was incredibly lavish. There were even dishes I had seen in the capital. Did they have professional chefs?
Delicious.
The meal was extremely satisfying. If only there weren’t all those eyes watching me eat.
She really is just like Akasha.
Whenever I ate, Akasha would always stare at me like this. But having everyone here do the same felt strange.
As I continued eating for a while, Yuho spoke to me with a smile.
“So, to get to the main point…”
I slightly lifted my head at her voice and looked at her.
“I would like Shin-nim to stay with us forever.”
“Pardon?”
I nearly choked on my food.
“And not just for a while… but eternally.”