Chapter 22
Chapter 22
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Translator: MadScientist
Chapter: 22
Chapter Title: A Public Spectacle
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“Hey, Lee Chang-woo. I know you just memorized a few sweet lines to try and pull this off. Where do you get off trying to bluff your way through this?”
This woman, Hwang Ah-young, must have lived a life of constant deception.
She refused to believe me, even with my pronunciation that a German professor had praised.
Hey, do you really think the original Chang-woo could pull something like this off?
“Warum tun Sie mir das an?”
(Why are you doing this to me?)
I shrugged, putting on an expression of complete bewilderment.
It was a gesture I found quite useful when backed into a corner while briefing people from the policy office.
Not stopping there, I pulled out my phone and dialed a random number.
Fortunately, someone I didn't know answered.
Pretending to be incredibly pleased, I launched into an exaggerated, lengthy conversation in German.
For about a minute, I rambled on with blessings like, ‘Your child is so adorable. I hope they grow up to be a wonderful adult, just like you.’
Finally, I ended the call with a reluctant goodbye.
Then I looked at Hwang Ah-young, shrugged again, and gave her a look that said, ‘Are you still here?’
Only after this performance did Hwang Ah-young finally show a flicker of uncertainty.
“Uh... maybe it’s really not Chang-woo?”
“Hey, Chang-woo can’t do stuff like that. It’s not something you can just memorize. His pronunciation is completely fluent, isn’t it?”
“He’s just a look-alike. Let’s just hurry up, apologize, and go back.”
“No, but how can someone who looks exactly like Chang-woo be born in Germany? What kind of bullshit is this.”
Hwang Ah-young, at a loss, bowed her head with a deeply embarrassed expression.
“Ah, I’m very very sorry.”
I concluded the exchange with a relaxed nod.
After confirming the women had returned to their seats, I immediately sent a message to Jung Hye-na.
I wanted to leave right then and there.
But Hwang Ah-young was still staring intently in my direction, her face a mask of doubt.
[Me] Hye-na, don't come here. There's someone who knows me.
[Me] I pretended to be someone else, but it looks like she doesn't believe me.
[Me] It'll be weirder if I leave right away, so I'll head out in a few minutes.
[Me] Please wait for me near the intersection.
[Jung Hye-na] Okayyy,,,,!! ♡
I ordered a 500cc glass of beer, drank it in three gulps, and stood up.
Just pretending to grab a single glass of draft beer before heading home after work.
That was the impression I wanted to give.
As I paid, I glanced over and saw the three women were no longer paying attention to me, laughing and chatting among themselves.
What a relief.
“Uh... six hundred won, please.”
“Here’s ten thousand won.”
“...?”
“And I think my bill was six thousand won, not six hundred.”
Why was he speaking English? What about Chang-woo looked American?
Come to think of it, his skin did have a slight look of mixed Northern European heritage.
Ah, he must have seen me pretending to be a second-generation Korean from abroad for Hwang Ah-young.
Just in case, I discreetly checked Hwang Ah-young's table one more time.
The moment I left the pub, I hurried in the direction where Jung Hye-na was waiting.
Truly, my world's most beautiful Jung Hye-na.
Even amidst the Friday night crowd, she seemed to shine with a noble light all her own.
She stood out, even from a distance.
“Ah, Oppa.”
Jung Hye-na spotted me right away, her face breaking into a bright smile as she waved.
Seeing her outfit, I found it hard to suppress a proud, fatherly smile.
A white blouse, a black jacket, and an H-line skirt.
Her shapely legs were wrapped in black stockings, with a subtle accent provided by a pair of blue high heels.
“Hye-na, dressed like that, you look like a rookie lawyer working at a law firm.”
“Oh, stop. I didn’t even go to college. You’ll make me blush.”
“Hey, college is no big deal... I didn't go either, so what does it matter?”
We stood there for a moment, facing each other and sharing a quiet laugh.
Suddenly, Jung Hye-na’s eyes, which were looking at me, went wide.
No, was she looking behind me?
Thud.
Someone placed a hand on my shoulder from behind.
A chill shot down my spine.
I-I don’t think I should turn around.
“I knew it. There’s no way another person who looks like Lee Chang-woo exists on this planet. Wow, you can speak German too? Your pronunciation was amazing, you know?”
Shit, it was Hwang Ah-young.
In that fraction of a second, countless scenarios raced through my mind.
Should I start spouting German loudly like before, asking what the hell she was doing? Should I just play dumb?
“And who’s this bitch? Your new obsession? Well, her face is... pretty. Ugh, this is so annoying.”
“Excuse me.”
“Hey, look at me when you speak.”
Why on earth do I have to suffer for the past deeds of Lee Chang-woo?
Because I inherited the life of an incredibly handsome man.
Because it’s impossible to inherit only the assets while leaving out the debts...
I must be losing my mind. What kind of nonsense am I spouting to myself?
“Look, Ms. Ah-young. I don’t know who you are, but.”
“You just said my name.”
Fuck.
I really must have lost it. To call her by her name here.
Jung Hye-na was also flustered, not knowing what to do.
I get it.
Just look at that venomous expression on Hwang Ah-young’s face.
A tender and kind twenty-year-old like my Hye-na would barely be able to breathe in front of her... huh?
Huh? H-huh? Huuuh?
What... what was that?
What just happened?
Something soft and plush was suffocating me.
Long, black hair swayed before my eyes.
Slightly cool, slender fingers were gripping my cheeks tightly.
Frozen for a moment, I realized.
Hwang Ah-young had just ambushed me with a kiss.
Right in front of Jung Hye-na.
◇◇◇◆◇◇◇ It was a scene so provocative that even the youths, full of plans to enjoy their Friday night, couldn't help but stop in their tracks.
A very pretty woman.
An unbelievably, fucking beautiful woman.
And an incredibly handsome man whose combination of features seemed statistically impossible.
A lover’s quarrel erupting on the street was already interesting enough to make them stop.
But then, the very pretty woman suddenly slammed a kiss onto the incredibly handsome man.
The eyes of the passersby, now an audience, darted to the unbelievably, fucking beautiful woman.
Her trembling fingertips were clearly visible under the neon lights.
How would this unbelievably, fucking beautiful woman retaliate in the next scene?
Dopamine exploded in the minds of those who had transformed from pedestrians into spectators.
◇◇◇◆◇◇◇ Bang! Bang! Bang! Bang!
That wasn't dopamine; it was the sound of adrenaline bombs detonating inside my head.
Right now, I was a frog that had been bitten on the ass by a snake.
If I didn’t think of a way to survive in the next 0.01 seconds, I would die from the venomous fangs.
What should I do? What did I do wrong?
The answer came through a process of elimination.
It all went wrong back at that pub.
I had escaped the crisis by doing something ‘Chang-woo would not do.’
That was a mistake.
I should have flipped the entire situation by doing something ‘Chang-woo would have done.’
Because I didn’t.
Hwang Ah-young, her suspicions not fully dispelled, had secretly followed me, leading to this disaster.
If it were Lee Chang-woo.
If it were the original Chang-woo, my predecessor who was born incredibly handsome.
What would he have done in a situation like this?
Just then, Hwang Ah-young’s two friends, watching with great interest from behind, caught my eye.
That’s it.
Thud.
I grabbed Hwang Ah-young’s shoulders and gave her a light push forward, breaking free.
Honestly, the kiss from a beautiful woman felt good.
But that was just the dirty hunger of my former virgin self, so I pushed the thought aside.
After pushing Hwang Ah-young to the side, I glared at her two friends.
“Hey. What are you two doing?”
“Uh, huh?”
“Ch-Chang-woo? Why are you asking us...?”
This was it. This was Lee Chang-woo.
This brand of asshole who would immediately speak down to his two-year-older ex-girlfriend’s friends of the same age.
But was ‘ex-girlfriend’ even the right term here?
“Hwang Ah-young is acting like this right now because you two aren't doing your job properly.”
“Um... well.”
“Is, is that our fault? Really?”
“Then is it my fault? You two should know damn well that Hwang Ah-young loses her mind over the smallest things. Or are you such great friends that you didn't even know that?”
“...Ah-young does tend to lose her mind when it comes to you, Chang-woo.”
“Please, let’s manage our friends properly. What is this, in the middle of the street? Aren’t you embarrassed? What are you enjoying watching?”
“Uh, now that you mention it, Chang-woo, I’m suddenly feeling embarrassed.”
“Ah-young. L-let’s just go for now.”
Hwang Ah-young suddenly shrieked.
“Hey! Lee Chang-woo!”
My heart nearly leaped out of my chest.
The psyche of a former virgin has no tolerance for such hysterical screams from a beautiful woman.
I desperately tried to keep the mask of Lee Chang-woo’s asshole persona from slipping.
“What now?”
“Lee Chang-woo! Why are you doing this to me?”
“Why are *you* doing this in the middle of the street? I told you this kind of thing is embarrassing, I told you not to do it.”
“When did you say that! You were the one who cackled, telling me it was good to watch, that it was fun! You told me to scream and rage even more!”
Shit...
I almost dropped to my knees and apologized without thinking.
Hwang Ah-young was now sobbing uncontrollably.
“I told you! I wouldn’t touch you whether you met other girls or not, but you had to at least let me know you were alive! If you just disappear without a word, I wait, staring at my phone, and I go crazy! I told you not to make me go crazy! Did I, or did I not!”
She did.
She had told me that...
It was only after being coldly rejected by the girl I had a crush on that I belatedly realized I was the only one who thought we had something...
“You bastard! You’re a real bastard! Son of a bitch! Really, *sob*, *hic*, waaaah! You dog-like bastard...!”
“Ah-young, stop it. Don’t do this.”
“Don’t stop me, you bitches.”
Hwang Ah-young struggled wildly, but her two friends held her arms firmly on either side and didn’t let go.
“You told us that if you did something pathetic to Chang-woo, we should stop you even if it meant breaking your legs. Remember?”
“You’re definitely going to regret this tomorrow. You’ll bitch at us again, asking why we didn't stop you from following him in the first place.”
“Hey, Chang-woo. We weren’t just watching for fun, we were waiting in the back to step in if Ah-young crossed the line. You know that, right?”
S-so that’s what it was?
“Let me go! Let go! You bitches!”
“Let’s go. Let’s go.”
“Ah, this is so embarrassing. Let’s go quickly.”
“Chang-woo. Take care. But you know, seeing you speak German was really cool. I never knew your brain was so sexy.”
And with that, the three women disappeared.
Leaving a very bitter and painful taste in my mouth.
I felt awful.
What was more annoying was that acting like Lee Chang-woo had been the right answer.
What if I had handled it like my old self, not like Lee Chang-woo?
I would have just wasted more time here and embarrassed Jung Hye-na as well.
Right.
Resolving the situation in one or two minutes was a good thing, wasn't it?
“Oppa, so what should we go eat now?”
Jung Hye-na, as if nothing had happened, smiled brightly and linked her arm with mine.
She paid no mind to what had just transpired.
She acted as if she hadn’t seen or heard a thing.
She must have been doing this all along.
In front of Lee Chang-woo, this was probably the right way to act.
Could it be that Jung Hye-na, seeing how I treated Hwang Ah-young just now, was reminded of her past trauma?
I gave her the softest, most affectionate smile I could manage.
“I’m craving a cold beer. Let’s go get a beer.”
“Okay. I’m craving a cold beer too. Let’s go!”
An event I didn’t want had occurred.
I handled it in a way I didn’t want to.
And only then did I get the result I wanted.
I really need a beer.
◇◇◇◆◇◇◇ As the incredibly handsome man and the unbelievably beautiful woman walked away arm in arm, the short show came to an end.
The audience members all stood in their places, silently savoring the afterglow of the moment.
They didn’t speak to one another, nor did they share glances.
But they all knew what the others were feeling.
The audience members became pedestrians once more, continuing on their original paths.
But this brief flash mob performance on a Friday night would remain in their hearts as a lingering memory for a long time to come.