I Knew I Was Fucked

We pushed forward — or rather, I did, alone — cutting down snake monsters as we went. Nearly twenty minutes had passed since we'd entered the dungeon, and not counting the first one, I'd already killed four more of the things.

Taking down five of them in twenty minutes on a Stamina stat of ten was pushing my body harder than it could reasonably handle, so we found a spot and sat down to rest.

"That was excellent work, Alan."

"You're too kind. I only managed it because Your Highness was watching over me from behind."

"Hohoho. Is that so?"

I'd only killed four more snakes, and already the look in Princess Prisia's eyes had changed. Back when I'd dropped that ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠first snake monster, her expression had been noncommittal at best. Now she looked thoroughly pleased — the face of a woman who'd just scored a real steal at a secondhand shop.

The reason she'd taken me as a vassal in the first place was to use me as a secret weapon against Hwaryongwang, the ruler of Indigo. She'd realized I had more talent than she'd expected, and she was delighted about it.

"Grrrh!"

Ivan, seething with jealousy at the cozy little scene unfolding between me and Princess Prisia. Cocky little shit.

"How much has your level gone up?"

Status window.

At Princess Prisia's question, I pulled up my status.

"I'm level 4 now."

"Level 4... Not bad at all."

Princess Prisia nodded. My level was still low, and I hadn't killed all that many monsters, but it had climbed fast all the same. Five snake monsters had netted me two levels, bringing me to 4. I'd also picked up an extra Lower Growth Stone along the way that bumped my Agility by a point, which was why that stat now sat at eleven.

One more level and I can pick a class.

There were eight classes in total: Warrior, Mage, Archer, Healer, Thief, Swordsman, Spearman, and Voodooist. Meet the conditions and you could grab any of them on the spot. Players called them Normal Classes. You could also switch classes later through the Class House, one of the facilities in the lobby.

In Fairy Masters, your class was a critical part of how you grew. Every time your class level went up, the class's primary stat rose by a point. And if a Master's class matched their Fairy's, that Fairy's growth rate jumped by ten percent. Matching attributes stacked another ten percent on top of that. Meaning if a Master and Fairy shared both the same attribute and the same class, that Fairy grew twenty percent faster than the rest.

Ordinarily, you'd summon a Fairy first and pick your class after...

One-star and two-star Fairies came out classless. Three-star and up were a different story — they arrived already holding a class. The standard play was to look at whatever class your first three-star-or-higher Fairy came with and build your own character around it.

Not an option for me. Nothing I can do about that.

A world I'd only ever played as a game had become reality. I couldn't whale on it. I couldn't cash in on the newbie ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠events that showered fresh accounts with currency. I didn't have a single Gem to my name, which meant I'd have to grab a class first, scrape together Gems, and summon a Fairy after.

They do give Gems for clearing dungeons, right?

Just like every other cookie-cutter mobile game, clearing a dungeon under the right conditions earned you stars — fifty Gems a star. Three stars per dungeon, so a full clear was worth a hundred and fifty Gems. A single Fairy summon cost three hundred. Two dungeons, three-starred, and I could pull.

If they don't give Gems, this is going to be a real pain in the ass.

The problem was whether a game-turned-reality would still hand out Gems the way the system used to. If dungeon clears didn't pay Gems, the day I summoned a Fairy would recede a long, long way into the future.

A Fairy, though...

The thought of summoning one before long sent a current through me. What kind of Fairy would come out? I ran through the ones I'd raised in my last life. It'd be nice if one of my old mains showed up — but the odds of getting the Fairy I actually wanted on a first pull were vanishingly small.

By the time I'd died in my previous life, the game had released over five hundred Fairies. Nearly five hundred new ones in two years. Money-grubbing bastards, those developers.

Anyway. That was a past life. I needed to focus on this one.

And I can do that with a Fairy, too.

I turned my head and looked at Princess Prisia and her Fairy, Ivan.

A few nights ago I hadn't been able to sleep, so I'd wandered the mansion in the small hours. Passing Princess Prisia's chambers, I'd heard a sound I physically could not walk away from — a wet, shameless voice spilling through the door without pause. Curiosity got the better of me. I eased the door open a crack, and what I saw stopped me cold.

"Haaah! Master's pussy! It tastes so fucking good! I love it!"

"Aaaah... Master... I love you, my Master!"

"Nngh~! Haaahn~!"

Princess Prisia had been naked, tangled up with Kyle and Ivan, the three of them writhing together. They'd turned into animals, devouring each other's bodies over and over. It was debauchery, plain and simple.

I got the hell out of there. Part of me had wanted to keep watching, but Kyle's senses were so sharp he'd looked straight at the door I was hiding behind. Honestly, that son of a bitch Kyle was never any help.

The important part, though, was this: Masters and Fairies had sex.

...I need to scrape together three hundred Gems and summon a Fairy. Fast.

A single Fairy summon cost three hundred Gems. A ten-pull cost twenty-seven hundred, which made the ten-pull far more efficient than going one at a time. But I needed a Fairy who could stand beside me right now, so I was going to do a single pull.

This had absolutely nothing to do with watching Princess Prisia spend the night with her Fairies. Nothing at all.

"Shall we move on, then?"

"Ah — yes."

At Princess Prisia's words I scrubbed the images out of my head and got to my feet. Time to clear the rest of this dungeon.

A hiss — then a wet crack.

The sword in my hand split a horned snake monster clean in two. Even with its body sheared apart, the thing still tried to sink its fangs into me. I shoved my shield forward and caught the strike without much trouble.

Another swing. The blade took the snake's head off. The horned skull spun once through the air and ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠hit the floor.

Vicious bastard.

Even reduced to a severed head, the snake monster glared at me with murder in its eyes. When I brought the sword close, it actually cranked its jaws wide to bite the steel. I had to hand it to the thing — that was some stubborn vitality.

Not long after, the mouth clamped shut and spat out a small stone.

Nice!

A Lower Growth Stone. Beginner's luck, maybe? The drop rate was only thirty percent, and I'd already pulled three of them. I popped the stone into my mouth, and a notification bloomed in front of me.

This is way easier than the game.

Part of that was ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠the dungeon itself — it was only F-rank — but it genuinely felt easier than playing had. In the game, every encounter dumped several monsters on you at once. Here, maybe because this was reality, they came one at a time. Two, at most. One-on-one, even I could hunt just fine.

And that wasn't the only reason.

The real reason I could tear through this dungeon this fast, by myself, came down to something more fundamental.

I'm not scared at all.

It was strange. Facing a monster didn't frighten me. What filled my head instead was the urge to kill the thing that wanted me dead. The feeling took my body over and wrung every drop of knowledge I had into the act of putting monsters in the ground. It was a sensation so foreign I had to wonder if I was even the same man who'd lived an ordinary life in my last world.

A short while later, I killed one more — a snake with three horns on its head — and finally, finally hit level 5.

A whole cascade of notifications. Aside from two of them, everything was more or less what I'd expected.

That was the boss? Guess F-rank really is that easy. Wait — a million Gold just to change a Normal Class? Are they kidding me?

In the game, a class change had cost a hundred thousand Gold. In reality, it was ten times that — a million. For someone mooching off Princess Prisia just to eat, that was an absurd amount of money.

Either way, of the eight classes in front of me, there was only one I was going to take.

Acquire the Swordsman class.

The moment I took the Swordsman class, unfamiliar knowledge poured into my head — how to handle a sword efficiently, the kind of thing you felt in your hands rather than recited. If I'd picked a different class, I would have received the equivalent knowledge for that class's weapon instead.

The notifications faded. I pulled up my status again.

Status window.

Now we're talking.

My status window had filled out compared to a week ago. Deeply encouraging. Leveling would slow from here, of course — but if I kept clearing dungeons and stacking Growth Stones, I'd catch Princess Prisia soon enough.

Anyway. Boss is dead. That's a wrap.

I dismissed the window and turned toward Princess Prisia and Ivan, ready to head home.

I took one step.

A deep, grinding roar shook the air — KRRrrrrrMMMM!

"Huh?"

The dungeon wall came down, and a notification bloomed in front of my eyes.

"...What?"

The instant I read it, my face went rigid.

Same dungeon name. The rank, though, had jumped from F to E. And the recommended clear level had vaulted from 5 all the way to 30.

What... the hell...?

The notification had appeared so suddenly it felt like my brain had locked up.

"What's the matter, Alan? Why did you stop?"

I stood there frozen, and Princess Prisia came toward me. The moment I saw her face, something clicked — something that was very, very wrong.

Prisia is two-star. Level 21. In an F-rank dungeon... she shouldn't be able to get Growth Stones at all.

Recommended levels existed for a reason. If your character level sat above the dungeon's, Growth Stones simply did not drop. And yet Princess Prisia had told me she'd been running this dungeon to farm them, slipping past Hwaryongwang's eyes the whole time.

That was a clear system error...

...Or maybe it isn't. If this dungeon is that dungeon... then nothing's wrong at all.

A thought flashed through my head. And if that thought was right, I was already as good as fucked.