Chapter 284
Chapter 284
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Translator: crow
Chapter Title: The Idiot Count's Surrender
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Really, it went off without a hitch compared to what I'd imagined—far easier.
I knew he was a moron of a human being, but even so... thanks to this count who exceeded my wildest expectations of stupidity, everything wrapped up in a mere thirty minutes.
The contract he handed over was essentially no different from just handing me the entire count's house outright.
And it even bore the count's own seals, stamped all over it.
Truly....
"What an idiot," I said.
"Even more than I thought," Alexandra replied.
"Heh heh heh. Was he that desperate to run away from the situation? Even so, you'd think a noble wouldn't sell off the house his ancestors worked so hard to build like this. But he actually went and did it."
"Exactly. That's why the family's in such a state. The previous family head and this one—no, now it's the one before last and the last one, I suppose?"
"I haven't said I'm taking over as family head yet."
"If those two hadn't been such trash, it wouldn't have come to this."
"I agree."
When it came to trash-talking the Roses, Alexandra and I were totally on the same wavelength.
Well, honestly, anyone you talked to about this would blame the family heads without exception.
"Honestly, when that contract came out, I even felt a little sorry for Christina for a second."
"I get the feeling."
"Heh heh heh."
I really hated the bitch, but even I couldn't help feeling a twinge of pity in that moment.
Really....
"What the hell kind of person is this Rose Count? A noble just throws away his house like that? All to flee to some villa in the east?"
"I can't understand it either."
Common sense-wise.
No normal noble would have accepted my proposal.
But this idiot count accepted it without a second thought, no hesitation at all....
Among all the people I'd met doing business, he was without a doubt one of the most pathetically stupid.
"And Christina actually tried pretty hard to manage the territory. I looked into the past records—no such efforts from the count."
"That's just who he is."
"Wow, seriously. I'm from a middling viscount family myself, but... I have no words."
"I didn't expect it to go down this easily either."
We were chatting in the parlor of what was little more than a guesthouse—not even a proper cabin.
The two of us had been plotting the downfall of House Rose for quite some time now, and with it basically over, we didn't bother holding back.
Of course, there was still some cleanup left.
"What are you planning to do with Alexandra?"
"Why ask me?"
"Honestly, I'm satisfied with how things stand. We've taken all of House Rose, and we've dealt with the idiot count. I'm starting to think it's time to head back down and relax."
Originally, I'd planned to go after Christina harder.
But somehow, that urge had faded more than I'd expected.
I wanted to get back quick and spend some fun time with my lovers, and besides, me getting full authority over the family was already the ultimate humiliation for her.
"Hmm...."
"Well, the easiest option would be to ship Christina off to the same villa the count's heading to."
"What's with this villa you keep mentioning? Is it haunted or something?"
"Oh, come on, I wouldn't do anything that nasty."
It was just a waterborne villa.
A truly beautiful one.
An incredibly pretty villa built right on the seaside, literally floating on the water.
Though it did have one tiny little issue?
"Oh, right. Putting other stuff aside for now—normally, Aunt handles managing House Rose."
"Me?"
"Yeah, because it's a hassle."
I tossed a few contract documents her way while saying that.
Thanks to the count's contract, everything in Rose was now mine, but it was seriously annoying.
I was already swamped with business; managing a whole count's house on top of that would be impossible.
Of course, if I dumped the business on Ivana entirely....
"It's not like I want to do it right now because it's annoying. Sure, I might take over management again in a few years, but for at least the next year or two, you'll handle family head duties."
"Why?"
"Because it's a real hassle, that's why? I'm twenty now. A grown lady—why would I want to be that busy?"
"......."
She gave me a deeply suspicious look, but it was true.
It really was a hassle.
"In exchange, I'll build new structures in the territory, bring in some of my businesses to boost local spending naturally, set up trade routes with the outside to bring in more money smoothly. That way, it won't be so hard for the territory folk to pay their taxes."
They could pay right now if pushed, but the problem was it left them strapped.
And with less spending money circulating, self-employed folks couldn't make ends meet, and it just snowballed.
Creating an environment where more money could be earned would solve it easily.
"Anyway, take care of it for me. I can't exactly hand family head and lord duties over to my mother."
"Sigh.... Fine. I've already gotten so much help. A year at least...."
"One and a half years."
"...Fine."
"It's basically just being a figurehead. Pop down to the territory now and then, smile and laugh 'ho ho ho' in front of the people. No need to do any grand good deeds—just follow the instructions I send in letters."
"What am I, a puppet?"
"But Aunt, you graduated from the academy in knight studies. In your third year, you had options like knight studies, magic studies, governance... and you picked knight studies. What can you do?"
"...Hah."
Alexandra laughed in disbelief, staring at me.
Did she think I hadn't done a background check on her?
"Anyway, you've worked hard these past few years. Just tough it out another year and a half, and you'll be living easy. I guarantee it. Want to sign another contract?"
"No need."
"Heh heh."
She was definitely the second-most likable person in House Rose after Rozalin.
Not as stunningly beautiful as Rozalin, but her looks were above average, and her personality was refreshingly straightforward.
Of course, that didn't mean I planned to make her one of my lovers.
No, if I even tried, my current girlfriends would chew me out—mildly at first, then a lot.
"What?"
"Heh heh, nothing. Oh, but make sure this guesthouse is always ready for me to use whenever I visit. Even before the year and a half is up."
"...?"
Anyway, the important thing was that everything had wrapped up neatly.
An ending that was more absurd and easy than I'd anticipated.
Of course, it was just pleasantly average since I could hang out with Rozalin sooner.
House Rose meant nothing to me anyway.
Rozalin and my other lovers were what mattered most.
*
"Such a shame Alexandra isn't coming along."
"...What's your scheme this time?"
"Assuming things on your own is a bad habit of yours, Christina."
"...Sigh."
Inside the carriage rode the Rose Count, the countess, and Christina.
At a glance, you might think it was just the Rose family off on a trip.
The carriage was top-notch, and the servants trailing behind looked utterly devoted.
The count was probably smugly assuming exactly that, in his idiotic way.
"Heh heh heh. Once you arrive at the eastern villa, Leandro here will explain everything. Have a wonderful trip, everyone."
"........"
"Yes, it should be a fine journey."
The count replied with a saintly smile, acting every bit the benevolent patriarch.
Christina just glared daggers at me.
Whatever. She wasn't worth caring about.
I loaded the three into the carriage and prepared for departure.
And I....
"I trust you'll handle it well."
"Everything is already prepared, milady."
"As discussed—no actions at all until they enter the villa. Absolutely nothing. Just make the journey as pleasant as possible."
"The others are fully aware. You've instructed top-tier hospitality for the first day."
"Good. That's the spirit."
The man stood there looking every inch the refined butler.
His brown hair was impeccably groomed, and the monocle added an air of intellect that inspired trust.
Naturally... he didn't look the least bit like an assassin.
"I've already set everything up on my end. When they arrive, just kick it off properly. If they don't want to die... well, they'll figure out how to escape on their own."
"They're all reliable Ants."
"Perfect. I've always liked the guild's little 'Ant' unit, you know?"
Leandro up front, the coachman, every servant in the other carriages—they were all people I'd hired.
Ants I'd bought from the Information Guild for a pretty penny.
In simple terms, they were odd-job operatives.
From stealing info to forgery, murder—all the dirty work no one should do, handled in secret by action-oriented agents.
"Heh heh heh...."
"Oh, one question, if I may?"
"Of course. What is it?"
"...We absolutely can't touch the count's belongings, right?"
"Yes. Hands off. Touch those, and we're all screwed. Stick strictly to what I've prepared—clean and simple. Any funny business, and our ties with the Information Guild are done."
I fixed the Ant leader with a cold stare as I said it.
If any of the pre-checked items went missing, we'd be prime suspects.
"It's an accident. A freak mishap with truly minuscule odds. The mana-supported waterborne villa drifts out into the middle of the sea one day and sinks tragically beneath the waves."
"Understood."
"I'll pay top dollar anyway. No need for warnings about avoiding stupid side gigs anymore...."
With that, I turned toward the guesthouse.
I wanted to get back even a day sooner to spend time with Rozalin and the others.
Seriously... why was dealing with these Rose idiots keeping me so damn busy?
"Haaah... I'm tiiired...."
I'd planned this for years, and now it was truly over—so maybe a bit of a letdown or malaise was natural....
But really, I just wanted to bang Rozalin and Lize at the same time.
Bonus points if I showed Ashley's usual play to them both....
"Heh heh heh."
That laugh just now... even I thought it sounded pretty pervy.