Becoming Human
For two days I grilled Na-rae, yet nothing resembling a clear answer came of it.
I still had no idea why that vampire had called me Mother.
The biggest problem was that the documents listing my own information contained nothing whatsoever about the vampire whose essence had been extracted. Strangely enough, it was simply labeled “high-ranking vampire essence” and left at that.
Partly to vent my frustration, and partly to sow chaos among Ilie’s faction, I wandered the surroundings and slaughtered vampires indiscriminately. Still no useful information turned up. Of course the small fry would know nothing; even the elder’s proxy had only spoken after pouring her own blood into my body. Disappointment was inevitable all the same. I might have learned the true identity of the component that made up thirty-three percent of me.
Watching me brood, Na-rae must have decided her position was in danger. She skipped sleep entirely, wrestling with documents and letters all day, before finally offering this conclusion:
“Perhaps… the high-ranking vampire essence used to create you, the Monster… belonged to that woman Ilie’s mother… who was also their elder…?”
Honestly, I suspected she was right. Not because I was too lazy to think—there were solid reasons.
First and foremost, a vampire who had gone so far as to pour blood into my body would never make such a claim without grounds. Everything else about them might be outdated, but when it came to blood they were more deeply versed than anything else in the world. An elder’s proxy skilled enough to hold that rank would never misread information from blood. If anything, she would have read every last scrap of it.
Second was the position of elder’s proxy itself. I had been created roughly ten years ago—and their elder had vanished roughly ten years ago. There had to be a connection. After the way she had called me Mother to my face, coincidence was impossible.
…I still didn’t know the exact relationship between the owner of the blood inside me and Ilie, but if any bond existed it was surely mother and daughter. I knew little of vampire social structure, yet the moment they called themselves a “house,” they could hardly be complete strangers with no shared blood. An elder’s child possessing the power and status to act as proxy would be only natural.
…But that wasn’t what I wanted to know. What abilities had the owner of this blood possessed? What name? What life had she lived, what kind of being had she been? That was what I was curious about—not some meaningless relationship.
If the two of them were mother and daughter, then in theory I might be able to do the same things Ilie had done… yet no matter how I tried to manipulate the blood, I simply couldn’t picture the image. Maybe it was because I had worn this body for less than a week. Honestly, half the time it still felt like I was dreaming.
The sensation of crushing bone and grinding flesh, the satisfaction of drinking blood—those had been brutally real. Even so, whenever I closed my eyes to sleep I half expected to wake up back in my old one-room apartment.
“That can’t be right.”
“Huh?! What can’t?! D-Don’t tell me you’ve thought of something I completely missed?!”
Na-rae, who had been quietly preparing the things needed for the flight, nearly jumped out of her skin at my mutter. Honestly. Did she think I was some psychopathic serial killer? I never killed without reason. She might have taken a wrong turn in life, but did she really need to be this terrified of me?
“Never mind. Just talking to myself—ignore it. More importantly, how are the preparations coming along?”
Asking about progress seemed to calm her; she patted her nonexistent chest in relief that she was still useful and rattled everything off.
“Everything’s ready except the photos. Once we take one picture to put on the ID and passport, we’re set…”
She glanced at me sidelong.
“Th-That face as-is would be a little… problematic, wouldn’t it?”
She was pointing out that my current appearance could hardly be called human, but after all that mental effort I was bored enough to tease her a little.
“Oho. So you mean I’m ugly?”
“N-N-No! Absolutely not! I-It’s just that ordinary humans don’t have horns or scales or inverted eyes or things like that! That’s all I meant—please don’t kill me!!”
Mm, still fun. She was like one of those squeeze toys that made a ridiculous squeak every time you pressed it.
“Why would I kill you when I still have plenty left to extract from you? Anyway, so you need a human appearance, is that it?”
That meant I would have to put on the choker. Well, it was about time I tried it.
Na-rae must have realized by now that she was far too deeply entangled to escape. Her face was already known to Ilie, and there was nothing useful she could accomplish alone even if she somehow killed me. It might feel refreshing in the moment, but she wouldn’t dare harm me once she considered the aftermath. Besides, she had no weapons to speak of. So… transforming should be fine, right?
“Wait here. I’ll transform and be right back.”
Still, doing it right in front of her was a bit nerve-wracking, so I planned to step inside. She might try to backstab me the second she saw an opening, after all.
In a spot deep enough to feel safe, I took one deep breath and fastened the choker.
What followed was far from pleasant. I’ll just call it immense pain. I learned exactly how it felt to have every bone twist and the entire body compress.
Na-rae came running in a panic, demanding to know what on earth had happened—that should tell you enough.
“Ugh… uuugh…”
I trembled violently amid the pain and cold. Na-rae prodded me with the tip of her shoe, asking if I was even still alive. Normally I would have flared up, but I lacked the strength. In truth I wasn’t even that angry.
“I-Is she dead…?”
“Not dead…”
Shaking like a leaf, I barely managed to stand. My whole body was a mess of blood. The source was obvious—it had come from me, most likely.
“Not something I want to do often… hurts like hell.”
I wasn’t joking; I had genuinely thought I was going to die. The description of how other Monsters transformed was nothing like this, so for a moment I wondered if something had gone wrong. Everyone else shifted smoothly without issue—why was mine so uniquely bloody? Because I was a vampire? Or because I was a twisted hybrid? That, too, remained unknown. Honestly, unknowns were all I had left.
But one thing had become certain.
This was absolutely not a dream.
Wearing a Monster’s body had felt dreamlike, but wearing a human body now made reality hit me with brutal force.
I had unmistakably become a woman.
The absence of the companion that had been with me for twenty-odd years, and the presence of the thing I had only ever dreamed of groping someday, both confirmed it.
I hadn’t even gotten to use it yet.
I hadn’t planned on marriage, but I had at least wanted to try it once. Even while wallowing in the sense of loss and frustration, the first thought that crossed my mind was how ridiculously large these breasts were.
…I gave them a tentative squeeze out of curiosity, but felt no particular thrill. Just, wow, nice texture—that was about it.
“F-First maybe you should wash up…? I can run out and buy clothes right away…!”
Na-rae still seemed to think my temper was the same as when I was a Monster; she kept glancing at my face while making cautious suggestions.
“Fine.”
My head had cleared enough that I waved her off to do as she pleased and headed for the shower room.
At least the place was livable enough to have somewhere to wash. After dousing myself in cold water and regaining some composure, I could examine my appearance more carefully.
Hair black on the outside and crimson within, exactly as in Monster form; the same crimson eyes. And a chest so massive anyone would wonder whether they had ever truly looked at it before.
Compared to the Monster form I looked far more human. Probably because the skin had some color now.
…Somehow my body seemed better than when I had been a man. Not just aesthetically—functionally as well. Overall I looked healthier. How becoming a woman could make someone healthier was beyond me.
Should I be happy about this, or unhappy? The fact that I had become a woman still felt unreal.
She was pretty, sure. But I had wanted to date a woman like this, not become one.
Of course, in this world a powerful woman was far better off than a powerless man…
More pressingly, I needed to settle on a name soon.
I couldn’t live as a human without one.
I racked my brain, but no clear name came to mind.
I finished showering while fretting and then wasted a full hour drying my hair. I had known women took forever to dry their hair, but I hadn’t expected it to be this bad.
Even after all that time-wasting Na-rae still hadn’t returned, so I wondered if she had bolted and sent a text. Her reply said she simply couldn’t decide what clothes to buy and was still shopping. I told her to grab anything casual and went back to staring at my phone.
“Is anyone inside?”
A voice that was unfamiliar yet somehow known knocked on the door and asked if anyone was home.
For a second I thought it might be a vampire and reached for the choker, then realized it was still daytime and decided that was unlikely. More importantly, the speaker was using Korean I could understand.
I wanted to believe Korean was the international standard, but I knew better—so the presence outside only deepened my suspicion.
No one should be looking for me.
Still half-doubting, I climbed the stairs and peered through the peephole in the front door.
And I froze solid.
Because the one standing there was Radiant White.