Let's Blow a Belly Raspberry
Shhhhhhhh.
"Hmm-hmm~ hum~"
Steam billowed thick through the shower as Ryushia hummed a little tune, washing herself down. Then she stopped, turning her dripping body toward the mirror and carefully feeling herself over, here and there.
"...Does it look like they've gotten bigger?"
The flesh yielded, soft and pliant under her fingers.
"My chest feels a little heavier, and my hips have gotten bigger too..."
Apparently, this body's development had no intention of stopping. Back in her Redanis days, Ryushia had been forced to subsist on mysterious calorie bars. Now that she'd broken free of the organization and was eating proper, nutritious Korean home cooking with her own two hands, it was hardly surprising that her bust had grown even more ample.
"If they get any bigger than this, it's going to be a real problem..."
That said, a woman's body was just too inconvenient. You had to wear a bra. Every time you ran, your chest bounced and threw off your center of gravity. Then there were periods, and even the muscle attached to this frame was built on a structure far less efficient than a man's.
"What the hell is even supposed to be good about these lumps of fat..."
Jinwoo's furtive little glances, the way other men stared at her body — it all got on her nerves more than she cared to admit. What was so pretty about this body, anyway? If you were going to lug around these enormous monstrosities, a slim, slender woman would be a hundred — no, a thousand times better.
"...And my waist is so thin."
Ever since possessing this body, there wasn't just one or two things that bothered her every time she showered. That slender waist looked like it would snap if you so much as landed a single kick. She really hated it. She'd originally had a reasonably sturdy physique. How had she ended up stuck with this uselessly soft body?
"I should just get out of here..."
Looking in the mirror any longer would only make her more disgusted, so she slowly turned and left. One thing was certain: whoever had designed this Ryushia character was a complete idiot. You'd hit number one in sales if you made a black-haired, slit-eyed slender character... The guy had no taste.
What? Ryushia ranks in the top three of every version's popularity poll, so doesn't that mean the designer knows exactly what they're doing?
No. In her opinion, every user who voted for a character like this had no taste whatsoever. Seriously, what was supposed to be appealing about this ridiculous body? The ideal female figure was a B-cup sexy slender, thank you very much.
"Filling out the Holy Kingdom's exploration rate? What's that supposed to mean?"
"Simply put, if you find treasure chests, hidden pieces, various gates, and so on, your exploration rate goes up. You can farm diamonds and all kinds of resources with it."
"Oh, so it's like mining — the flower of F2P?"
"Exactly."
Whirrrrrr.
After finishing her shower, she'd given Jinwoo a quick rundown of the plan while drying her hair. The Academy to the Holy Kingdom wasn't a distance you just casually dropped by. Since they were here anyway, the idea was to comb the place down to the last tile and scoop up every collectible in sight.
"So where's the first place we need to go?"
"Well, you see..."
The gates would take too long, so those could wait until last. Better to start by hunting down treasure chests.
"You'll just need to follow me!"
"Uh... and you know the locations?"
"Of course. I've got them all memorized."
She took him by the wrist and headed outside.
"Ooh! If it's an adventure, I'm coming too!"
"Ah, so you were here."
Raby appeared at just the right moment and tagged along.
"Leave it to me this time! I've got a Master Map!"
Even if Ryushia's own memory wasn't perfect, with this fairy's help they wouldn't miss a thing. For the first stop, that place would do nicely. And as for supplies, Iflata alone ought to be plenty.
She grabbed the girl.
"E-eek?! W-what's going on?! Am I being kidnapped?!"
"I'll need you to come with us for a bit."
And so she dragged over Iflata, who'd been slacking off in a convenient spot.
"N-no! Mommy told me not to follow strangers..."
"I'll buy you a Switch 2."
"Woof! Woof woof!!"
There was a bit of token resistance in the middle, but true to her airheaded nature, she folded in an instant.
"I'm bored. Can I touch your boobs?"
"Jinwoo, could you hold this little pervert for me instead?"
"W-wait, huh?!"
Of course, the horny brat had tried to sneak in some nonsense along the way, so Ryushia dumped her on Jinwoo.
"Mmm~ This feels just like being in Daddy's arms..."
"Don't squeeze too hard."
Still, watching Iflata grin from ear to ear on Jinwoo's back, a smile tugged at Ryushia's own lips. As expected, that man suited other women far better than her. She wasn't the heroine, so the least she could do was play the bridge that brought them together.
"How is it?! Don't guys' hearts start pounding when they give a girl a piggyback ride...?!"
"Stop watching so much anime, you damn weeb."
...They still had a ways to go, of course, but it would be fine.
And so Jinwoo and Ryushia set off, Raby and Iflata in tow, heading somewhere in particular.
"Where is this? There's treasure in a place like this?"
"Iflata? Could you come down for a moment?"
They'd arrived in a dense forest, trees packed tight in every direction. From here, they had exactly one job.
"So what am I supposed to do?"
"Burn down every last tree here."
"Ryushia, I don't care how little I know, I got fire-safety education starting in elementary school! You actually go to prison for arson!"
"Oh, that's fine. I've personally pickled a few dozen people and never gotten arrested for murder. Ordinary common sense doesn't apply to us."
"Are you a Celestial Dragon or something?"
"She's a demon..."
Bewilderment flickered across Iflata and Jinwoo's faces as they looked at her. Given that this was a game world, it wasn't entirely out of the question. The thing was, like any other open-world game, the protagonist's character committed an absolutely staggering number of crimes by real-world standards. Trespassing to fill out the collection log. Destruction of property for smashing pots and wooden crates. Aggravated assault and battery for spamming skills on villagers when you got bored. Illegally tearing up state-managed parks. Flying through sovereign airspace without permission. Unlicensed hunting of every wild animal in sight. And in a certain other game, even staging a rebellion against the Raiden Shogun and aiding the resistance was technically the crime of insurrec—
"Ryushia, that's enough."
"Eek...! If you keep that up, the game's actually going to blow up and turn into Genesis:Revive! You have to be careful!"
"Ah. Right."
Anyway! Here was what she'd been trying to say.
"Ryushia..."
"Want me to lend you an ethics textbook? I think you need one."
"..."
Strange. Why had her reputation fallen this low?
"Iflata? That's enough of that — time to put in some work."
"Well, if you say so, I guess I don't have a choice."
The bickering wrapped up well enough, and Iflata rolled up her sleeves at Ryushia's instruction. And then...
"Inferno Eclipse!"
⟨ Inferno Eclipse ⟩
The crimson-flame mage girl unleashed a torrent of scorching fire.
FWOOOOOOOOSH!!!
Flames sprayed forth like a flamethrower, reducing the trees to cinders in an instant as smoke billowed upward. One tree, two trees, then dozens — and at that point...
"That's enough."
"Hweeeeh..."
Iflata had poured out every drop of her mana. She flopped to the ground, completely spent.
"Let's see... it should be around here."
Ryushia stepped into the aftermath of the blaze, ash drifting on the air, picking her way over blackened remains as her eyes darted about in search of something.
"Ah! Here it is."
An ornate treasure chest gleaming with white light sat waiting for them.
Click.
Clatter-clatter-clatter!!!
"A hundred diamonds, plus gold, and even EXP materials — pretty decent haul."
"Are we done?"
"No? We've still got a long way to go."
"What."
Now then, the next place they needed to go was...
"Maestro? I'm counting on you."
Clack-clack-clack.
"...Fine."
This particular gimmick required their puppeteer's help. It was a treasure chest sealed behind a mechanism that unlocked when objects of a certain weight were placed on specific pressure plates.
"First, bring out five marionettes and send them to the coordinates I specify."
"Alright."
Originally, getting your hands on five square stones meant jumping through all sorts of hoops... but ever since Maestro dropped, gimmicks like this had become trivial to cheese. Players had thrown an absolute fit about even puzzle mechanics being paywalled. But hey — she'd already pulled her, so she might as well use her thoroughly.
"Oho~ My dear maiden! Shall I take my place here~?"
"..."
The marionettes were a bit talkative, but they made excellent counterweights...
Rumble-rumble-rumble!
"Puzzle complete!"
A hidden stone door ground open, and the chamber beyond was packed with glittering treasure.
"I can clock out now, right?"
Maestro looked thoroughly wiped from all the exertion, clearly itching to rest as soon as possible.
"No. Let's do a belly raspberry before you go."
"...What?"
Iflata had already gone off to sleep, and here they were still grinding away... She was allowed to be a little petty, right?
"Come on?"
"Hiih...?!"
Maestro, who'd been dreaming of leaving on time, went pale as Ryushia approached with a wicked smile creeping across her face.
"C'mere!"
BRRRRRRRRRR!!!!!
"Hgyah?! Hiih! Th-this is weird! I told you not to do stuff like this!"
Her body was definitely made of wood, and yet she flailed her arms and legs in a tremendous fuss.
"Whew! All done!"
"Hhn... hh... I... I'll never forgive you..."
Unlike Ryushia, who wore a thoroughly refreshed smile now that the raspberry was over, Maestro's face was a picture of pure humiliation. She was a doll anyway, so why the overreaction?
"Okay, you're dismissed!"
"..."
She trudged off, all the strength gone from her steps, and vanished.
"Ryushia. I've got a request too."
"Yes, what is it?"
Jinwoo, who had been watching the whole thing with great interest, tossed the words her way.
"I want a belly raspberry too."
"Ah, I'm sorry, but Maestro already clocked out..."
"No, not her. You."
"...I must have misheard you?"
Hold on. She had not seen this coming.
"You heard me! Why do you get to give them out and I don't get one? I've been dragged all over the place too, so do me!!"
"Th-that may be, but..."
And then he started throwing a tantrum like a little kid. Come to think of it, she'd been dragging this brand-new newbie all over creation, working him to the bone without a second's rest. Time to... throw him a carrot, maybe. Push him too hard and he might just drop dead on her, so this much should be...
"Well, I am a man, after all. I can do at least that much for you..."
"Yahoo!"
This was a friendship raspberry, nothing more. There were absolutely no dirty intentions involved... There'd better not be.
"L-like this?"
"Yep!"
Jinwoo approached Ryushia, who was standing there in an awkward half-crouch.
Gulp.
And then that leotard came into view, tracing every smooth line of her abdomen. The fabric was so thin it even helpfully put her navel on full display. And then...
BRRBBBBBBBBB!!!
He planted his face straight into her soft stomach and blew.
"HYAAAAAAAAAH?!"
Ryushia shrieked at the hot breath against her belly, her whole body twitching...
She's seriously cute as hell.
Jinwoo grinned as he watched her twitch like she'd short-circuited.
"The benefits around here are pretty nice. Can I do this next time too?"
"...Are you trying to die? It's a good thing I'm a man. If I were any other woman, you'd be getting sued for sexual harassment."
Watching Ryushia tremble, her face flushed a deep red, filled him with a deep and thoroughly satisfied pride.