Chapter 2
Chapter 2
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>Translator: Lord First
>Chapter: 2
>Chapter Title: A Black Mage Even Demons Would Admire
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>A Black Mage that even the Demon Race would be shocked, amazed, and envious of!
"Aah, you pervert!"
"Ugh!"
A man who had accidentally flipped a woman's skirt and was making a perverted face was sent flying into the sky by a single punch from the woman. As he soared through the air, he crashed through the ceiling of someone's house with a blissful expression on his face.
This would be impossible in an ordinary world, but here, it was perfectly normal. After all, this was a ‘Gag Anime World.’
"Oh no, I'm going to be late."
Students hurried on their way, regardless of such incidents.
"Seriously… and I’m not even wearing my cute panties today…"
A female student teared up over the strangest things.
"Mwahahaha! I am the greatest man in this world!"
"As expected of you, sir!"
A gym teacher whose hair defied gravity and whose pupils were shaped like flames, followed by a procession of buzz-cut students.
I lived in a world where all of this was considered normal. Or rather, I had been living there.
***
Staring up at the ceiling, caked in black dust, I said aloud.
"It's an unfamiliar ceiling."
The moment the words left my lips, an indescribable sense of satisfaction washed over me.
‘I’ve always wanted to say that!’
With that thought, I sat up.
*Creeak, groan.*
I had been lying on a sunken, moldy bed. The room was so small that two people could barely lie down in it.
‘Reminds me of the jail cell I spent a week in after being framed. Haha.’
For someone who had lived in a world of MAX-level gags, the sudden change in environment wasn't particularly shocking. I just accepted it and swung my legs off the bed.
"Huh?"
Feeling that my legs were much shorter than they should be, I finally looked down at my body.
"Whoa, whoa?"
Startled by their drastically reduced length, I shot up from the bed. Judging by my height, I looked to be about thirteen years old.
"Now I'm even getting younger."
It's not like I'm some kid detective...
I let out a dry, disbelieving laugh before I started to look around the room.
‘What is this? A real prison?’
Seeing the bars on the small window high up on the dreary gray wall, I thought it might actually be a prison.
‘First, let’s search the area.’
There was no need to search every nook and cranny. The room contained only a small bed and a desk. The desk didn't even have a drawer, so the only thing I could find was a single old book.
"Let's see..."
I opened the stiff, worn book, its pages like paper that had been soaked and then dried.
[ Lord Odil, who saved me—a slave born of a filthy bloodline—is my god and my salvation. ]
"What the hell is this?"
The text that followed was nothing but a long string of praises for a Black Mage named Odil.
"Pfft, what kind of name is Odil? A name like that came up in the novel I was reading yesterday. I thought, 'No way a name like that actually exists'—but here it is."
I scoffed at a name that sounded like it belonged in a bad pun, then my body froze.
"...A novel?"
Oh, for crying out loud.
I hastily threw the book aside and pulled at my hair. The worn-out tie at the back of my head came loose. As my eyes took in the pure white hair that fell to my shoulders, my pupils began to tremble.
"No, this can't be happening!"
I clutched my hair, a surge of indignation boiling within me.
‘When did I ever leave a 5800-character long-form comment?! Or stick with the author until the very end of the series?! All I did was casually read a popular novel before falling asleep!’
The only reason I didn't scream was because I knew just how dangerous this world was.
‘Of all the people to be reincarnated as, I had to become the villain in a dark fantasy novel?!’
And unlike the usual clichés, the body I possessed didn't even belong to a noble family!
‘No, this is a dream. Yes, it has to be a dream.’
I staggered back to the bed, lay down, clasped my hands together, and closed my eyes.
‘God, please tell me this is a dream. Please, please, please.’
I squeezed my eyes shut, praying desperately, until I suddenly realized something. I cracked one eye open and whispered.
"...Status window."
...Nothing happened. Damn it.
I covered my eyes with my hands and mumbled.
"This is a dream. Yes, a dream."
As I repeated the self-hypnosis, my heart felt a little lighter.
‘Yeah, maybe it really is a dream. It’s not like this is the first time something like this has happened.’
In the Gag Anime World, using dreams to show an ‘if’ scenario was common sense.
‘Should I try dying? Maybe I'll wake up then?’
I glanced at the window and realized jumping was not a viable option. Just as I placed my hands over my chest again and closed my eyes...
"Rian!"
"...Hah! Yes!"
A loud shout made my body bolt upright. It was an almost instinctual movement. At the same time, a throbbing pain began in my head.
"Ugh..."
Along with the pain, unfamiliar memories started flooding in. They were the memories of the body's owner, ‘Rian.’ The scenes flashed by quickly; it seemed he was abused by his parents, ran away, and was then captured by slave traders. After that, he was sold as a test subject to a Black Mage's laboratory, where he worked so hard as the Black Mage's dog that he was eventually put in charge of managing the other slaves.
‘This bastard. I read about him in the novel, but he’s real trash.’
Why would a Black Mage who saw children as nothing more than experimental materials put Rian in a managerial position? The reason was simple. The kid's personality was so rotten that even a demon would be impressed.
"Rian!"
"Yes!"
An irritated shout echoed while I was still processing everything. Knowing I might get zapped with magic if I was any later, I scrambled out of the room.
*Clang.*
Opening the iron door, I stepped into a long corridor. The shout had come from the room directly across from mine. As the Black Mage's personal attendant, slave, or whatever, Rian's room was right opposite his.
*Knock, knock.*
"Excuse me!"
"Enter!"
*Click.*
As I opened the door and entered, a gaunt man with an undisguisedly irritable expression looked my way. A foul smell hit me as soon as I stepped inside.
‘He should really air this place out.’
I grumbled internally but maintained a subservient posture as I walked in.
"Hurry up and clean this stuff up."
The Black Mage pointed to one side with the staff in his hand.
‘Yuck.’
He was pointing at something censored with a mosaic.
‘Looks like I really am in my old world.’
The Gag Anime World was, at its core, rated for all ages. Anything that crossed the line would be censored like this.
‘...Even the girls' locker room.’
I shed an internal tear, recalling strategically falling towels and thick steam. Fortunately, it seemed you could see everything clearly when doing *that* sort of thing. Of course, since I had zero experience, I couldn't know for sure.
"I have some business to attend to. Make sure you clean up properly."
"Yes! Great Lord Odil! Have a safe trip!"
"Right."
Odil left the room, leaving me alone.
‘The novel said his familiar is always watching.’
That's what the description in the novel said. I abandoned any foolish thoughts of snooping around and dragged an old sack from the corner of the room, into which I began stuffing the mosaicked something.
‘Ugh, it's slimy and warm.’
After stuffing all the mosaic chunks into the sack, I tied the opening tightly. I pulled a handle on the wall, revealing a chute. I placed the sack inside and closed it, and the sack slid down the chute inside the wall to somewhere below. It must have been a waste disposal system.
‘Anyway, this room is filthy. So much dust.’
The floor and walls were quite dirty.
‘He’s just like my mom.’
I thought of my mother, who couldn't do a single household chore but had a heart of gold, before leaving the laboratory.
‘I should probably clean up the rest of the traces too.’
A pool of what looked like blood remained where the mosaic had been. My work wouldn't be finished until that was taken care of as well.
‘A mop, right.’
I went down to the kitchen and opened a cleaning supply closet in the corner. I grabbed the necessary tools and returned to the room.
Some time later.
"Phew, all done."
I lightly wiped my forehead and looked around the room. It was now sparkling clean, the years of grime completely gone.
"I only meant to wipe the floor, but I instinctively got carried away..."
I was scratching the back of my head when...
"I'm back—... What is this?!"
"Ah, welcome back."
"Wh-why is my room shining...?! You! You used holy power, didn't you?!"
"Wh-what? No, I didn't!"
"There's no other way this room could be shining like this!"
His words made my face flush.
"N-no. It's not *that* shiny..."
"Hah, was my crystal ball always this color? No, no! This has clearly been purified!"
Overwhelmed by the flood of compliments, I couldn't stop a goofy grin from spreading across my face.
"You...! And I was being nice to you?!"
"Whoa! W-wait, please calm down!"
"Calm down? After you dared to betray me?!"
Just as he raised his staff, the gem at its tip glowing menacingly as if to unleash a spell...
*Flap, flap.* The crow that had been dozing on its perch flew up and landed on Odil's shoulder.
*Cawwww!*
The bird let out a cry, conveying some message to its master.
"What? He just cleaned thoroughly?"
*Nod, nod.*
"You're telling me it can get this clean just from cleaning...?"
"Ahem, hem. Actually—"
Knowing this was my only chance to live, I immediately started talking.
"When I thought about how this is a place used by someone as great as Lord Odil, I was overcome with motivation.... I never imagined you would be displeased. This is all because I admire you so much, Lord Odil."
"W-well, of course. Ahem."
Odil, who had lived a long life without recognition, cleared his throat and blushed. He seemed to like the praise.
"As expected of Lord Odil! The pride of Black Mages! You are a Black Mage that even the Demon Race would be shocked, amazed, and envious of!"
"Well, yes. I suppose that's possible. Yes. Mm. Just... go a little easier on the cleaning next time."
"Yes, sir!"
The moment Odil nodded and turned away, his familiar, the crow, flew back to its perch. I silently gave the crow a thumbs-up. In response, the crow raised a wing like a thumb and nodded.
‘It was worth feeding it Odil’s snacks.’
I praised my past self for secretly offering the nuts Odil had bought for himself to the crow, which had looked pitiful with its rumbling stomach.