Chapter 9
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Translator: penny
Chapter: 9
Chapter Title: Hunters
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Ting-a-ling, ting-a-ling.
The summer breeze, thick with heat, set the wind chimes hanging pitifully under the eaves jingling.
‘Old man, remember that time?’
‘Which time?’
‘When we first started living together.’
‘Of course. Didn’t you suggest it first?’
‘Yeah.’
‘Heh heh, I just realized I never asked. What was it about me that you liked so much back then?’
‘You’re asking now? Well...’
“Haap!”
I jolted awake with a sharp gasp.
I’d snapped out of a nonexistent memory that had unfolded in an instant.
What was that?
I’d clearly been reminiscing with a white-haired Ro Boss after about sixty years of married life, on the verge of some important conversation.
Somehow, she looked exactly the same even after sixty years.
Her hair color hadn’t changed a bit!
‘Oh, well, that makes sense.’
She already had white hair now.
Turning black in old age would’ve been the real horror show.
Anyway, it was definitely summer.
Summer... but...
Reality, once I escaped the fabricated memory, didn’t match my delusions at all.
Of course, the “home” Ro Boss had mentioned didn’t mean shacking up together.
-And, well, there are plenty of empty rooms available right now.
“Ah, yes.”
Ro Boss’s offer was simple kindness.
Happiness Apartment already had several vacant rooms anyway.
Honestly, aside from the owner’s place, it was nothing but empty rooms.
So this kindhearted young woman was just offering a homeless stray like me a spot to get out of the rain.
-Um, was that too nosy? You don’t have to if you don’t want to.
“No, no! Of course not. I’m grateful! I feel like I should at least pay rent or something.”
-N-No, that’s fine. No one uses them anyway.
“Ahem, if you insist that much, I won’t refuse. I look forward to your kind hospitality.”
I bowed deeply, phone in hand, as a sign of respect.
Since it wasn’t a video call, Ro Boss wouldn’t see it.
But that didn’t matter.
This was genuine gratitude from the heart, not some social mask!
Of course, a couple passing by shot me weird looks for suddenly bowing to my phone.
‘Whatever.’
Thirty thousand won an hour plus room and board.
That deserved this level of mindset at minimum.
To be blunt, I could understand if Ro Boss had let me in just to gawk at a homeless mutt.
Being kept by a gloomy, white-haired, silver-spooned beauty from the shadows!
Sounds like a light novel title, right?
If they published it in Japan, it’d sell 100,000 copies easy.
By volume six, anime adaptation for sure.
Opening scene: Me and Meow holding hands, strings tied to Ro Boss’s fingers, dancing like marionettes.
Thanks to Ro Boss’s care healing the mental scars from the Pollution Investigation Bureau, I headed back to my studio first.
I couldn’t live there anymore, but I had to grab my stuff.
Amid the total wreckage, I packed clothes into the one intact bag and grabbed my three-section staff—now my soul partner.
[Thanks for everything up to now.]
I left that text for my landlord, who’d reported me as a terrorist, and bailed.
Normally, I’d haggle over the deposit or remaining rent, but no need here.
Who caused all this mess in the first place?
The Bureau was unavoidable, but I was tempted to sue the landlord civilly.
Even leaving it at that fulfilled my tenant duties.
So I headed straight to Happiness Apartment.
The bustling streets grew quieter the closer I got, just like always.
Passing homeless folks staring blankly at the sky from the pavement and gangs of delinquents eyeing easy marks, I finally spotted my dream apartment.
And then.
“Meow.”
“You little shit, Meow!”
I charged at Meow, who’d appeared like it was waiting for me.
I grabbed its arm and hoisted it into the air.
“Do you have any idea what I went through because of you?!”
“Meeeow.”
“Listen up, bro’s gonna tell you a fucking epic story from now on.”
I tormented Meow all the way inside the apartment like that.
Honestly, it was mostly Meow’s fault—say 6:2:2 split. -Bureau and old landlord take the rest. Obviously, zero blame on me.-
But you can’t hold a speechless beast fully accountable.
So Meow’s punishment: endure cuddling at stuffed-animal levels for a while, plus mandatory viewing of the Kang Han-sik Show, rivaling the Oprah Winfrey show.
No veto power. Constellation or not, pay for your crimes.
“Meow, ever been in a Bureau cell? Thought the food was crap at first, but damn, it’s good. Like these egg buns or whatever. Oh, you know what an egg bun is? Looks like thiiiis...”
“DE-SHAA!”
Its screams, like an independence fighter tortured by colonial cops, echoed until we hit the fourth floor.
I finally stopped harassing Meow and went looking for Boss.
Ding-dong!
The place I visited daily felt different today—not for delivery, but another reason.
“Oh, come in. Mr. Han-sik.”
“Hello, Ro Boss. I’ll be in your care. So, which room’s mine?”
“I was planning to lend you 403 next door... Ah. Want to step inside for a sec?”
“!”
She even invited me in.
I wasn’t about to refuse.
“Then, excuse me for a mo...”
And then.
“...”
I faced a mountain of trash.
“...What.”
“J-Just sit there and wait. Ugh, where’d I put the other room key.”
I screamed internally at Ro Boss rummaging through the garbage pile.
“Fwaaaaaah!”
“Kyaa!”
She yelped cutely at my outburst.
But I couldn’t stop.
I wouldn’t stop.
“Aaaah!”
“M-Mr. Han-sik?”
“This can’t be reality! Aaaaaah!”
A girl’s room should be fluffy and warm by rule, right?!
But before me was an illegal dumping ground.
“Aaaaah!”
“Mr. Han-sik? What’s wrong all of a sudden? Seeing something weird? But why? It’s been fine until...”
Weird?!
Of course it’s weird!
I grabbed Ro Boss’s shoulders—her eyes suddenly a bit colder.
“W-What’s all this, Ro Boss?!”
“Huh?”
“Your room! Why’s it like this?!”
Clutter everywhere, bento containers probably from Sauce Ne.
Toys and clothes strewn haphazardly.
“It’s all trash! This isn’t a home! Aaaaaah!”
Pointing out the disaster snapped her gaze back to normal, cheeks flushing.
“Ah, haha... A little messy?”
A little?!
No one but someone living in a mid-Pacific plastic waste island would call this “a little”!
Wait a sec!
Come to think of it, Ro Boss had severe social anxiety and mild cognitive issues.
Her social perceptions were off—could this be that?
‘Thinking about it...’
I’d never seen her take out trash, or even a garbage truck around here.
She probably didn’t know how to handle it.
That realization sparked furious rage.
‘Those fucking evil public institutions!’
Taxing us for starving kids, street cleaning, beautification—yet ignoring the injustice right in front of me!
I was livid beyond endurance.
And I decided to channel that fury constructively.
“Ro Boss.”
“Yes?”
“Stay put for a bit.”
“W-What are you suddenly...”
I rolled up my sleeves, ignoring her question.
This trash—this fucking insane trash.
You’re all done for today.
I’ll clean every last bit.
Leaving a bewildered Ro Boss behind, I started a massive cleanup.
“I-I’ll take care of it later...”
“Just sit. Consider this payback for missing work today.”
She tried stopping me once she caught on, but no dice.
From watching her, if I left it to her, she’d toss a few big bags and call it done.
Not slander—pure fact.
So I’d sweep it all at once.
Luckily, cleaning wasn’t too bad.
The worst in abandoned spaces are bugs and mold stench—but weirdly, none here despite the trash mountain.
It reminded me of that time.
When Ro Boss told me her name.
The bugs on me died on their own then too.
‘It’s gotta be that.’
Ro Boss’s angelic power.
Bugs can’t even approach her saintly virtue.
With that in mind, I kept cleaning.
Filled dozens of 100L bags and hauled them to where the garbage truck passes.
No truck near Happiness Apartment, so it was a trek—honestly exhausting.
But for 500k a month from Boss, doable.
By the time I finished, it was evening.
Normally Sauce Ne time.
Not today.
I’d called So Boss ahead since cleaning would take long—told him about the Bureau too, and he laughed like a maniac, telling me to rest.
“Whew.”
I leaned on the sofa, soothing my weary body and soul.
At first, I thought this sofa was some trash modern art piece—but after clearing the gunk, it was just nicely luxurious.
“Meow.”
That’s when it happened.
Meow claimed my hand, confirming the job was done.
Door open during cleaning, now it treated the place like home—but I let it be.
Too tired to shoo it, and owner Ro Boss didn’t mind.
Staaaare.
Ro Boss seemed uninterested in Meow, just staring at my face instead.
For real.
No words, but the vibe screamed, “What kind of guy is this?”
‘...Fair.’
Even I thought today was overkill.
Work that’d cost 400k from a pro cleaner, done unasked.
I’d seen it as a must-do, but some might find it intrusive.
So I spoke to Boss, who watched me observantly.
“Uh, no need to feel burdened. I wanted to do it.”
“I know.”
“...”
But seriously, her stare.
She smiled faintly after hearing me out, but didn’t look away.
My mouth itched awkwardly.
‘No!’
Superior beings’ gazes are lethal just lingering!
Ro Boss could slay me with eyes alone—she was that beautiful.
Seven minutes more, and I’d combust from embarrassment.
Topic change needed.
I noticed Meow toying with my right hand and spoke up.
“Uh, want to pet it?”
Meow looked creepy to most, but Ro Boss seemed unfazed.
Sure enough, her eyes lit up at my words.
“R-Really?”
“Yeah.”
“For real, for real?”
Jackpot—she was hooked.
Bait switch successful.
“Of course.”
I nodded eagerly at her.
I’d even washed Meow during the big clean.
Perfectly safe to touch—or bite, lick, whatever.
I thrust my right hand (with Meow) toward her.
Squish.
“...?”
Squish squish.
“Hee hee.”
Ro Boss giggled brightly, kneading what I offered.
But not Meow.
My right hand.
Squish squish squish.
What the fuck!!!
She shoved Meow aside and started groping my hand?!
W-What’s this?!
What’s with those hand movements?!
Too stunned to speak, she murmured softly.
“Sturdier than I thought.”
Even evaluating it like that!
Nothing to say when your palm’s getting played with!
‘Like Crayon Shin-chan or what!’
At least she didn’t go crazy like, “Great for making babies” or “Perfect dad material.”
Devil Go blocked a grown virgin’s path sincerely, but Ro Boss wasn’t that far gone.
Not that it mattered—I didn’t call her out.
I knew anyway.
This was a clash of common sense—me not seeing Constellations right, her social deficits.
Prime combo for misunderstandings.
I got it.
I knew, so I should correct it... but...
‘...Feels nice.’
Her tiny hands on mine felt surprisingly good.
After today’s ordeal, maybe sneakily accept this much?
In that suffocatingly awkward moment, hand extended...
Static-.
[Hello, viewers! TV for you...]
The corner TV blared news—pre-scheduled, right on time.
Ro Boss’s gaze shifted there, freeing my hand.
I caught my breath and stood.
“W-Well, I should head out.”
“Ah... Already?”
“Yeah. Got the key. Time to unpack.”
“Okay. See you.”
After goodbyes, I grabbed 403’s key and went next door.
Worried it’d be trashed too, but just dusty—no real cleaning needed.
I swept the floor and laid out borrowed bedding from Boss.
“Meow.”
Meow somehow snuck in—milk chute?—claiming the spot beside me without effort.
Thus ended my first night at Happiness Apartment.
The next day.
[Major Pollution outbreak. Near XX District. Exact location in link below...]
[Hello, Mr. Kang Han-sik...]
[Hope you’ve been well, big bro.]
Woke up to a few texts.
Skipped the irrelevant disaster alert.
The important ones from Han So-yeon and Park Ho-cheol were similar.
‘They wanna meet.’
Something about the recent job we wrapped—gotta go.
After guard duty and delivery, of course.