Chapter 3
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Translator: penny
Chapter: 3
Chapter Title: 003 Happiness Apartment
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After clocking out from the guard post, I headed straight back to my studio apartment.
And after a quick prep, I made my way again to the delivery-only bento shop, 'Sauce Ne'.
"For real? You're working as a security guard at Happiness Apartment?"
"Yeah, that's right."
"Huh. Live long enough, you see everything."
When I brought up the new boss to So Boss at Sauce Ne, he reacted with surprise and said that.
"That lady doesn't seem like the type to hand off work to just anyone."
"That's what I thought too. Do you know her, boss?"
"Well, she's a regular customer, after all."
I nodded, watching So Boss shrug.
Even at a glance, with deliveries going everywhere, the guy must have wide connections.
Of course, I hadn't expected him to know someone who owned an entire apartment building, but somehow, with So Boss, it didn't feel strange.
That vibe, that aura he gives off.
Just looking at him, you can tell he's no ordinary guy.
Even when I first came for the interview at Sauce Ne, I thought, what’s someone like this doing selling bentos?
'I'll use this high-powered Sauce Ne boss to land my dream full-time gig...!'
No, even so, that might be going too far.
Good in theory to recommend an employee to another business, but realistically? Not happening.
I reined in my wild imagination and said goodbye to the boss.
"Alright, I'm off, boss!"
"Yeah. Take care. I hear the ants and the suit guys have been clashing lately."
"Psh, no worries. Who do you think I am?"
"53rd Battalion's top driver. This'll be your twelfth time hearing that. Now get going!"
I took the slightly older Starex van, cruised around the neighborhood, and finally arrived at the apartment with the new boss.
Ding-dong.
Man, this feels kinda weird.
Getting a bento from the boss to deliver to the boss.
From now on, for clarity, I need a different title or something.
As I mulled that over, the door creaked open.
I bowed my head right away and greeted her brightly.
"Good evening! Boss."
"Oh, hello."
Up until now, it was just customer and delivery guy, but from here on, she's my superior, so I had to be more respectful.
"Here's your meal."
"Thank you."
"Ah, wait!"
I handed over the meal politely and grabbed the apartment boss, who scurried inside like a hermit crab.
"...Pardon? Did you have something to say?"
"Um, may I have your name?"
"M-my name?"
"Yes. You're going to be my boss from now on, so I should know it."
Thinking about it, we should've covered this at a proper interview, but somehow, we never had a real talk.
Probably because of her personality.
Sure enough, I spoke first to the boss, who couldn't hide her flustered look.
"By the way, I'm Kang Han-sik."
"Kang Han-sik?"
"Yes. Feel free to call me whatever's comfortable."
"Ah, sure! Kang Han-sik... Han-sik."
The boss nodded, mumbling my name a few times.
"And you, boss?"
As I watched her, she turned away, biting her lip like she was agonizing, then finally spoke.
"...Roy."
"Pardon?"
"Welte Zuroi. That's me."
"..."
I nearly screamed at hearing a name I'd never encountered before!
I mean, really!
She didn't look very Korean, sure, but I never imagined she actually wasn't!
Honestly, I couldn't even guess the country.
From the sound, maybe Russia?
But don't they use Mila or something-ski there?
Is that even her real name?
Someone with a badass name like Welte Zuroi speaks Korean too flawlessly...!
'No way!'
Is it an alias, maybe?
Back in middle school second year, I dreamed up cool names like Kang Kast or Kang Gyu-gong.
Never told anyone, of course, but everyone has their embarrassing phases!
I suppressed the whirlwind of thoughts with superhuman patience.
And as a mature adult in society, I said what needed saying.
"Got it. Nice name."
Crack.
"Ah, bugs."
For some reason, a few bugs dropped dead right in front of me.
They were twitching their legs, clearly done for.
"What? Dead? Hang on, I'll clean them up. Probably stuck to my clothes."
Lucky for me.
I swept up the suddenly deceased bugs while managing my expression, which felt ready to burst.
Thankfully, the boss didn't notice anything off from my actions.
"Nice name, heh."
If she had caught on, she wouldn't be fidgeting her fingers with that suspicious smile.
Soon, I finished managing my face and stood straight.
"Welte—no, Zuroi. Hmm, that's not right either. Ah, Ro Boss? Can I call you Ro Boss?"
"...Pardon? You can just use my name."
"No way, you're the boss. I couldn't presume."
"W-well, fair enough. Call me whatever's easy."
"Yes! Ro Boss! Enjoy your meal, see you tomorrow."
"Heading out?"
"Yeah. Gotta return the van and clock out."
"Ah, okay. G-goodbye."
Bow.
Maybe because we'd exchanged names.
Unlike usual, Ro Boss saw me off.
She's quirky in many ways, but with that killer looks, it didn't feel bad at all.
'Yeah, that's what matters.'
So her name's Welte Zuroi (self-proclaimed), and she's got antisocial vibes—so what?
Pays well and pretty. Good enough.
With that thought, I returned the van and went back to my studio.
Bought a few things online, and by nightfall, I hit the bed.
Another day survived perfectly.
Good job, Kang Han-sik.
Live strong, even in the wild.
As those thoughts swirled, sleep came quick.
The next day.
Morning came, and my ordered stuff had arrived.
Contents: fluorescent vest and telescoping baton. Essential gear no guard can skip.
'Boss said just report by phone.'
But I couldn't rely on that alone.
No way could I let a woman who looked frailer than me handle perverts, and those shady guys from before might not leave me alone.
At minimum, I needed gear to protect myself.
"And with this, I'm set."
I tapped my palm with the baton experimentally—felt a slight sting.
Only those who've been hit know: a baton bruise aches for at least two weeks.
I didn't want to know, but my high school senior-year homeroom teacher kindly demonstrated.
'Wonder how that guy's doing. These days...'
Anyway.
Fully geared up, I clocked in at the guard post on time.
No need to report in person.
This was her usual sleep time, apparently.
Lives completely flipped day-night, but asks for a quick rundown of the day when clocking out.
So I logged my arrival in the duty journal in the corner and started work.
Work meaning just guarding the entrance and checking CCTV, nothing much.
Looked like I could watch the actual TV next to it or play on my phone, but first day, so I didn't.
'Those shady guys could show up anytime.'
As I gripped the baton tight and monitored CCTV.
Rustle.
A sudden presence behind the guard post sent chills down my spine.
'Shit!'
Pervert?
Finally, the psycho bastards prowling a women-only apartment crawled in!
But CCTV showed nothing?
Blind spot maybe? I grabbed the baton and stood.
If I can't see on screen, check in person.
The sound came from nearby anyway.
I opened the guard post door and headed toward the noise.
And there was an intruder, alright.
Just not human.
"Meow."
"A cat?"
A pitch-black one at that.
Fiddling with a plastic bag on the ground near the post—that was the sound.
As I approached, the cat looked up and met my eyes.
"Mrow."
Jet-black fur with golden eyes—gave off a premium vibe.
"Just a stray?"
Looks decent enough, but Ro Boss lives alone here.
If it were a resident's, that'd be trouble, but stray's fine.
I ignored it and turned back to the post when—
Swish, swish.
The black cat approached and rubbed its head on my leg.
This guy's got no fear.
"Meow."
I ruffled its head roughly. Lots hate strays, but I'm neutral—neither love nor hate.
Just petting lightly to shake it off, but it purred happily.
Likes me, huh.
YouTube has those 'cat chooses owner' videos.
'This one too?'
Even from an animal, being liked felt good.
But no playing on the job.
"Hey, I gotta work. Go over there."
"Meow."
It meowed like it understood and backed off.
Weird stuff happens.
Anyway, intruder checked out, back to CCTV.
And not long after.
Two people entered the CCTV frame.
Thought passersby at first, but no.
They loitered near the apartment, then pulled out a camcorder and started filming around.
"What the hell."
Not good, obviously.
Filming near work's suspicious enough, plus what I'd heard.
Time for me to step up.
Grabbed baton and vest, headed to the spot from CCTV.
"Hey!"
"...A person?"
"You can't just film here!"
"Huh? Oh, that’s..."
Never imagined anyone else, their faces full of shock at seeing me.
Looked like high schoolers caught red-handed.
That boosted my confidence.
I asked them.
"Where you from? No idea why you're here, but you're bothering residents. Mind leaving?"
"Oppa, what do we do?"
"I-I don't know. But is that really a person? People live in Happiness Apartment?"
"The Constellation said there'd be something here."
"Even so, it's an isolation zone! Didn't expect someone to pop out!"
Wait, what.
"Oppa, do something! This dangerous?"
"Hey? Didn't you hear? I said leave."
"Wait, Su-ji. One more video and we're at 100k subs. You know? From 100k, we talk to Him weekly."
"I know, but..."
Why ignore people?
Sounded like shady plans.
I closed in.
But they still ignored me.
Getting pissed now.
"Hey! Answer me..."
"Ugh... fine! Be careful, oppa!"
"Yeah! Grab anything, 100k's nothing—500k maybe!"
"Huh? Hey! Hey!"
Shit!
Suddenly, the guy, lost in their world, bolted toward the apartment.
"Hey hey hey! You can't go in!"
I chased to grab him.
Of course!
First day on security, unauthorized intruder? Can't happen!
At best, Ro Boss downgrades me.
At worst, regrets hiring and fires me.
Getting canned from a gig I just landed? Nightmare.
So I grabbed his shoulder. Or tried.
"Court Jester's Footwork!"
But the psycho's body went all slimy like an invertebrate and slipped free.
I get it.
Patron Constellation power he has!
"Hey! You lunatic! No skill shouts—talk!"
But he ignored me.
Damn, what now?
Chuck the baton at his head?
Or hold the girl responsible?
If I lose the job over this, sue for damages?
Would cops even listen? Not their jurisdiction.
As grim thoughts raced—
Thud.
Halt!
The guy, finally stepping onto the grounds, froze.
What.
Why's he like that.
"O-oppa!"
The girl behind called desperately.
"Huff, huff."
But he didn't budge, then hyperventilated, hands shaking.
"Oppa! Oppa okay? Snap out! You can beat it!"
"Uwaa, uwaaaaa!"
"Kyaaah!"
Then seizure.
Thud!
The guy screamed and rolled on the ground.
"What the fuck!"
Why's he freaking out!
Overdid the sprint?
In the army, forced a weak kid to march, he foamed just like that.
"S-sorry! We won't come back! Spare our lives! Please!"
Seeing ghosts or something, spouting nonsense.
"Sob, boo-hoo! Oppa, what do we do!"
The girl behind cried buckets watching him.
"What do you mean what! Come get him!"
But she collapsed sobbing, deaf to me.
Both losing it.
Haa.
I sighed deep, grabbed the seizing guy.
"Uwaa, aaaah!"
"Stay still!"
"Aaaak!"
Dragged him forcibly off the grounds and dropped him by the girl.
She finally looked up, mascara smeared, snot and tears everywhere.
Might pity her to some, but I was annoyed.
"P-please help. We're good people! J-just filming a YouTube video! Really, just curious what's inside..."
Even babbling unasked—restraint deserved a sticker.
I gritted my teeth and said.
"Enough. Take him and go. I'll let this slide."
"...R-really?"
"Yes."
Part of me wanted cops, but Ro Boss said authorities avoid here.
So just get out and leave me alone.
I shooed the frantically nodding girl.
She finally hauled the unconscious guy and headed opposite the apartment.
I watched their backs, then voiced a sudden thought.
"Ah, and."
"Hic! Y-yes?"
"Get that guy to a hospital. Seizure from a short run? Tell him to exercise more."
"..."
She gawked, mouth agape—found it random maybe.
'No.'
Meant well, why the stare?
"Heard me? Answer."
"Y-yes! Got it. I'll do exactly that."
Only after my irritated last words did she reply and vanish.
Whew.
What a first-day mess.
At least no breach. Lucky.
As I headed back—
"Meow."
Swish, swish.
The black cat had snuck up, rubbing my leg.
Right where the guy seized.
I bent and petted its head.
"Man, you don't get those idiots either, huh?"
"Meo."
"Not 'meo', just 'yeah', dude."
"..."
I grabbed its paw, shook it playfully with my lame joke.
Expected dislike, but it followed my hand calmly.
But briefly.
"Enough. Back to work."
I returned to the post and continued.
Thankfully, no more intruders.
But.
[I Visited Happiness Apartment]
A few days later.
I gnashed my teeth watching myself on YouTube's popular videos.
"You fucking bastards!"
I let them go without cops—they should've stayed quiet!
Repay kindness with enmity!
Catch you next time, I'll snap your legs!