Chapter 19
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Translator: penny
Chapter: 19
Chapter Title: Residents' Meeting
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There, sitting was a woman with green-dyed hair.
She was quite the beauty, with a wavy half-ponytail.
In the old days, it would've been a look you'd only see in comics.
However, rather than her beauty, I tilted my head at the story I'd just heard.
"The book likes me?"
Was this some kind of sales tactic for the shop? In a mage's store, it's not the customer who likes the product—it's the product that likes the customer.
The thought crossed my mind for a moment, but I quickly shook my head.
This was a genuine mage-run shop, after all.
No way they'd pull cheap stunts like that. That line she just said clearly had some meaning behind it.
So I picked up the fallen book and set it down in front of the woman.
"I'm just pretty likable, I guess."
"......?"
She responded with a faint smile, half a beat late.
"Hehe, you're a funny one. So, what brings you all the way here?"
Jokes were indeed the best icebreakers.
Of course, being treated like a kid grated a little, but I didn't call her on it.
Mages often couldn't judge age by looks, after all.
With that in mind, I cut to the chase.
"An acquaintance sent me. Do you know So Boss from the Sauce Ne bento shop?"
"Oh, of course. But it's unusual. For him to send someone my way."
"Uh, are you two not on good terms or something?"
I asked, picking up on her slightly lukewarm demeanor.
If I'd come recommended by someone she didn't get along with, it wouldn't exactly leave a great impression on me either. But it was needless worry. The woman smiled and replied.
"Nothing like that. It's just been about five years since we last talked. Getting contact like this catches me off guard a bit. Ah, don't just stand there—have a seat and let's chat."
"Yes."
I pulled out a nearby chair at her gesture and sat down.
She introduced herself first, midway through.
"Call me Kiki."
"......Pardon?"
The name caught me so off guard that I found myself repeating it.
Kiki, of all things!
For a woman with such a mature air, it was way too cute!
But even at my reaction, Kiki's expression didn't change.
From the context, it didn't seem like a joke.
Well, if there are people named Welte Zuroi, then sure, a Kiki exists too.
She's a witch, after all.
Maybe even a witch who moonlights in deliveries like me.
"Yes, nice to meet you, Kiki. I'm Kang Han-sik."
I bowed with the respect due a fellow line of work, and Kiki took it with a smile.
"Nice name. Mind if I call you Han-sik?"
"No, of course not."
"Alright then, Han-sik. If So Boss sent you, you're no ordinary customer. You've got something on your mind, right?"
"Yeah, I wanted some advice."
"Advice?"
"Yes."
"Let's hear it, then."
I repeated to Kiki the same story I'd shared with So Boss.
I figured it'd feel awkward spilling this to a total stranger, but surprisingly, it didn't bother me much.
Maybe it was her laid-back vibe or the shop's cozy atmosphere.
That said, it was just my side—Kiki's expression grew more serious as my tale went on.
By the time I finished, she was staring right through me like she couldn't believe it.
"Is that really true? You feel none of the constellations' mystery at all?"
She phrased what I couldn't sense as "mystery." That word choice alone felt utterly trustworthy.
"Yes, of course. Ah, but you have to keep this secret."
"No worries there. I'm not the type to go blabbing a kid's secrets around."
With that, she held out her palm to me.
"Just to be sure, you're still seeing nothing right now?"
Looked like she was working some magic.
But naturally, I felt zilch.
"Yes."
Staring at that display, I couldn't help thinking Kiki might actually be a hunter examiner instead of a witch.
It felt like she'd boot me out any second with a "come back when you can see it," but she didn't.
"Well, this is something. Truly unusual. I'd like to look into it more closely—got a bit of time to spare?"
"Of course. That's why I came, originally."
Humming a tune, Kiki flipped the "open" sign to closed.
Then she guided me toward the back of the shop.
"This way, follow me."
I trailed slowly behind her.
The back room was bigger than I'd imagined, and it radiated pure fantasy vibes.
"The front at least felt like a modern pharmacy."
The hanging lamps were candles, not bulbs; unidentified glowing ores dotted the space; pentagram-scribbled papers adorned the walls. And most tellingly.
"Iron Maiden?"
For whatever reason, a massive iron hunk that screamed "torture device" squatted dead center.
What the hell even was that thing.
Bang!
In that instant, the door behind me slammed shut with force.
The noise made me jump despite myself.
No, seriously, what the fuck.
There'd been no one behind me.
Suddenly, So Boss's words popped into my head.
"She looks like that, but her personality's a bit off."
Her unique aura had kept it from my mind until now.
I forcibly tamped down the anxiety creeping up.
No matter what, she wouldn't pull anything weird right after meeting...
"Alright, first things first—strip down?"
"......Pardon? Out of nowhere?"
"Hm? Problem? Better to undress for a proper check."
"Ah, got it."
Phew, figures.
Relieved at Kiki's far more reasonable attitude than I'd braced for, I shed my outer layer.
Then I followed her instructions through a bunch of actions.
Boiled down to one word, they smacked of religious medical rites.
You might scoff "medieval church nonsense," but there's no better way to put it.
She had me lay hands on power stone-looking rocks, read aloud from books, prick my finger to drip blood on pristine paper, and more.
And maybe because I cooperated without fuss.
Kiki soon spoke up, like enlightenment had dawned.
"Can't pin the exact mechanism, but I get the gist of what's going on."
"Really?"
Honestly, I was floored.
Figuring it out in just an hour or two via these rituals?
This was a pro.
No contest compared to the vampire manor crew—Kiki was leagues beyond.
I straightened up and zeroed in on her words.
Some baffling jargon snuck in, but cutting to what I grasped.
"...So, basically, I can't interact with that 'mystery' stuff at all?"
"Right. Not a perfect explanation, but close enough."
I apparently had a body that couldn't interact with the "mystery" she described.
Honestly, it wasn't crystal clear on first listen.
I didn't even know precisely what her "mystery" entailed—just a hazy guess from the vibe.
So she followed up right away.
"Mystery means mystery, plain and simple. Phenomena that defy physics, the bizarre, the grotesque, things impossible by normal logic."
"Just to check—that 'normal logic' is...?"
"Ah, obviously the old world's. Strictly speaking, accepting mystery's existence is the new normal."
"Figures. But phrasing it like that makes me feel like the one lagging behind."
"Hehe, nailed it."
What.
I stared at Kiki's suddenly ChatGPT-esque reply.
But she continued with a perfectly straight face, like it was nothing.
"Let me put it simpler. Hmm, right. Han-sik, ever played online games?"
"......Yeah, obviously. You have too, Kiki?"
"A little, back in the day."
"Didn't peg you for it."
"Heh, witches are human too. Gotta kill time somehow. Anyway, picture this world as a game—the constellations' arrival was like a massive patch."
"Earth 2.0?"
"Hehe, exactly. The net was full of that chatter back then. That day, lore-only mysteries turned real."
True, there'd been buzz like that.
"But somehow, the patch skipped you entirely. It's not zero talent for mystery or denial like rare mages—it's like no data exists. No influence given or received, not even perception."
"......"
I chewed on her words in stunned silence for a while.
Something felt off.
Obviously so.
Heard of evolutionary laggards before, but "under-patched human"? First time.
"But that's me, holy shit."
Ridiculous enough already, but it fit too well to argue. Words failed.
Seriously.
Others freaking or fawning over whatever.
Per Kiki, normal for me to miss it—no data on them.
Couldn't devise a sharper real-world analogy.
Laughter bubbled up unbidden.
Under-patched fucker.
Constellations, pollution—all database ghosts till now.
Realizing it this late.
Me.
Absurd.
To the extent I half-wondered if this was my morning nap dream dragging on.
Seemed plausible, but nope—cold reality.
"Your face says you're not thrilled."
"Who would be? That'd make them the weirdo."
"Fair enough. Hehe. No mystery communion means zero blessings too."
Yet Kiki—who'd raised the point—chuckled away.
Now I got why So Boss flagged her personality as weird.
Sharp as hell, but empathy lacking.
I'd just dumped years of blessing drought turning my life to shit on her.
So perhaps that's why.
I grilled her straight, no filter on my swirling thoughts.
"Okay, then why can't I perceive constellations right?"
"My guess: can't detect their mystery. Constellations are mystery-stacked beings, but you clock only the raw essence."
Ah.
"Couldn't even perceive the manor monsters?"
"Guess: most non-constellation monsters are pure mystery lifeforms."
Fuck, so the boogeyman was mysterious.
"Only the key worked among magic tools?"
"Others impose mystery on you; the key imposes on objects. Strictly, you didn't 'use' it—you just relocated a mystery-infused item."
Gotcha.
"Any fix?"
"Not yet."
Fuck me.
Ultimately, I let out a hollow chuckle laced with curses.
Tons to say, but overload kept it jumbled.
Sat on the floor a spell, and Kiki piped up again.
"Ah, but that's not the full picture. Like spotting Myrmidons or Deep One forms—even I couldn't nail that down."
I see.
Suggests more to dig, but nothing critical.
"Eh, no data for me, but wanted to hawk some skins, I bet."
Fans like that excel at merch.
"Hehe, human skins?"
"Yep."
I cracked a wry grin at Kiki playing along with my shitty joke like it was normal.
Minutes later, I stood and bowed to her.
Absurd talk or not, do what needs doing.
"Thanks, Kiki."
"Hm?"
She seemed indifferent to the gratitude. Unsure if she saw no reason for it or just blanked on why.
I brushed it off.
"Feels like a weight lifted, thanks to you. Obsessed over it for years, but hearing it out? No biggie."
"Hmm, 'no biggie'? You really see it that way?"
"Yeah. Ah, absurd as hell, sure. 'Under-patched human' still sounds nuts."
True story.
The term itself rang wrong.
Poll folks on future selves—murderer, psychopath, under-patched—and last'd get fewest votes.
"But knowing's half the battle. Plus, your take says no need forcing a perception shift."
"That... yeah, probably. You don't affect mystery; most won't touch you either. Obsess over invisible, intangible stuff? Perfect recipe for a broken mind."
"My thoughts exactly. You closed shop and checked me out—gotta thank you."
Plus.
Didn't voice it, but I wasn't hating my current self much.
Piercing Eunha-eun's true nature, clearing Hunters' gig risk-free.
Even landing Happiness Apartment security? All thanks to this quirk.
Sure, years wasted job-hunting ground my teeth.
"But that's on no one."
Confirming my state today? Top-tier recent call.
Solidified my path forward.
Plus massive win realizing my insane luck so far.
Sank in listening: Hunters, Eunha-eun—all upsides from my trait.
And that's when it hit.
"Hehe, such a polite kid. I think I know why the world's outer mysteries picked you."
"Pardon?"
Kiki suddenly name-dropped the book from earlier.
Smiling faintly my way, she spoke in a low voice.
"Han-sik, ever thought about becoming a magic engineer?"
But the pitch was tough to parse.
"......?"
Small wonder.
Magic engineer?
Me?
Right after that talk?
I eyed her, figuring it for a joke.
"That possible?"
"Of course. Mages? No. But magic engineers? Anyone can."
If you want it, I'll make it happen.
Her reply bucked expectations—genuinely enthusiastic affirmative.
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