Chapter 26

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Translator: penny

Chapter: 26

Chapter Title: Secret Room (1)

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Even after the first skirmish ended with the downstairs neighbor bursting in, the little guy kept picking fights with me at every turn, hissing irritably whenever our paths crossed.

Pass by and make eye contact? He'd puff up his tail and go kyaaak!

Pass by again and lock eyes? He'd crouch into a charge stance and let out a kyaaaak!

'Sigh.'

Finally fed up, I scoured the cat gallery forums for affection tactics that might work and tried them all, but the rascal ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠never once accepted my merciful touch.

"Wooowooong!"

He'd play all nice and demure around Cha Se-ra, but the second we were alone, out came his true colors. What a sly little devil.

Of course, as the adult in the room, I couldn't hold a grudge or retaliate, so I diligently scooped fresh litter into the toilet box and kept my cool, patiently waiting for him to lower his guard.

Scrrch.

Thud.

"Woooonng..."

I served up his usual premium kibble in the bowl, but he sniffed it a few times with utter disinterest before unleashing an uppercut that flipped the whole thing over.

Whack!

Spinnn!

The bowl spun through the air, scattering the carefully portioned food everywhere across the room.

No, had this spoiled cat lost his mind?

Not knowing the value of his own meal and knocking over the table like that—it was so outrageous, fury bubbled up inside me.

"Waaaooong!"

"Ee-wooowooong!"

Round two underway.

This time, though, I wouldn't repeat the same mistake. I decided to settle the household pecking order with a bit more dignity.

Click.

The drawer slid open once, and in my hand was a Churu.

I pulled out his favorite salmon-flavored treat and beckoned. For once, he couldn't stick to his stubbornness—he started sneaking glances at me.

"...Waaong."

After much internal debate, Nuri whipped his head away with what seemed like blood-curdling resolve.

That sealed the poor Churu's fate.

Squish!

Confirming his defiance, I mercilessly tore open the Churu, licked it teasingly with quick flicks of my tongue for a teabagging show, then casually slipped into my room and shut the door.

Of course, I hadn't actually eaten it—just demonstrated what happens when he gets uppity.

"Waaaooong?!"

He yowled in stunned outrage a few times, but when I ignored him, he trudged off sulkily and hid in his little safe spot.

'Hmm.'

Round two: my victory. A few more repeats, and he'd have no choice but to submit.

'Time to rest.'

Playing at his level had worn me out more than expected.

I flopped onto the guest room bed and logged into the Archive. The channel was buzzing as lively as ever today.

A bizarre scene where Najoo Tangerine was getting roped into the Forest Guild raid party on the spot to fill the tank shortage.

 I smirked at the sight, binge-read the backlog until my stomach growled, then headed out.

Creeeak.

"Waaong."

I opened the door, and there was Nuri waiting in front of the room, meowing lazily in a much meeker tone.

He glanced up slyly, then headbutted my leg.

Rubbing his head against me like that, it seemed he'd finally realized this pointless battle brought no gains.

'Hmm.'

That desperate for Churu, huh?

Then he needed to show the proper attitude before facing Pharaoh.

I fetched the neatly stored Churu, sat down, and he rolled over with a pleading mewl, rubbing up against me shamelessly.

"Waaong, eeyaong."

Okay, passed.

He'd finally acknowledged the hierarchy and shown true submission, so as a proud descendant of the great heavenly deity, I had no reason to withhold mercy.

I squeezed out a bit and offered it. He lapped it up blissfully, tongue flicking away.

'Easy.'

I'd braced for a tough fight given his finicky rep, but this wasn't even a battle.

No wonder—even S-Rank Hunters and celeb actresses crumbled before me. What chance did this pipsqueak have?

It was as inevitable as the sun rising in the east.

"Weong."

After slurping it down contentedly, he got one last head rub before retreating.

At first, he just seemed obnoxious, but now? Kinda cute.

'Hmm.'

One worry down. Now, with Cha Se-ra gone, what to do with my time?

I'd prepped some backup pics for this, but maybe time to shoot fresh ones for Clam.

"Yeah, time you earned your keep."

"Eewooong?"

SNS freebie tactic numero uno: cat photo op.

Last buster call got good traction, so while at her place, might as well milk his cuteness.

Click!

Click, click!

A shot whenever he struck a cute pose, plus a few playing with toys.

Test-uploaded some, and yep—explosive response.

'Hmm.'

Never crossed my mind before, but this guy might actually be useful.

At this rate, maybe promote him to glorious honor guard number two after Cha Se-ra?

Bestowing the title of honorary knight upon him, I roamed the house, snapping combo shots everywhere to maximize the haul.

"Gwaaong!"

"Yeah, yeah."

At first indifferent, he caught on that I was playing with him and eagerly followed, cooperating fully.

After a full circuit, we crashed in the living room for a breather.

Lying there, I tilted my head back and spotted the room at the far end of the living room—the one Cha Se-ra had strictly forbidden opening in her absence.

"......"

She'd said make myself at home, but that one room was off-limits.

Human nature screams to open what you're told not to, but I wasn't that petty.

'But...'

Kings may have secrets, but vassals shouldn't, right?

As I wrestled with that inner devil's whisper, Nuri noticed my gaze, sauntered to the door, and started pawing the long handle with jumps.

Click!

Click, click!

One of those door-opening cats from internet shorts.

He wasn't quite pro-level, but he had some skilled moves.

Click!

Creeeak.

After a few tries, the door swung open, and he slipped inside tail swishing, vanishing.

'Hmm.'

Maybe this was heaven-sent chance?

I didn't want to go in, but Cha Se-ra had asked me to keep him out of trouble.

Not my fault, then. Sure, a smidge of curiosity, but ultimately righteous duty.

Creeeak.

Super genius Weathermancer, commencing exploration.