Great Misfortune
The sound of the clock filled the darkness. Tick-tock. Tick-tock. Great Misfortune. Ah, it really had been a long time since I slept this comfortably. If I closed my eyes, I’d drift off right away… Like hell I would. ‘What time is it now?’
I turned my head and checked the clock. Four a.m.
“Haa… I can’t sleep.”
I was starting to get fed up. No matter how hard I tried, sleep refused to come. Was it the unfamiliar bed? My stomach let out a loud growl. On top of everything, I was starving. It made sense—I hadn’t eaten a thing since returning to Earth.
Maybe I should make some ramen.
I shuffled into the kitchen and rummaged through the cupboards. Not only was there no ramen, there wasn’t a single instant meal in sight.
That’s right. Mom always hated it when I ate ramen.
What else was there? I lifted the lid of the nearest pot. Inside sat a pot of cold doenjang jjigae. Looks delicious. And it had beef in it. I snatched up every piece of meat I could see and shoved it straight into my mouth.
I opened the pot beside it next.
“This is…!”
Miyeokguk. Beef miyeokguk, to be exact. Once again, I plucked out every visible chunk of meat and devoured it.
Click.
“……?”
The light flicked on. Who did that? I spun around to find Mom staring at me with a look that said she pitied my entire existence. The overwhelming sensation of being a thief washed over me.
“What are you doing?”
“I was just hungry, so I grabbed some meat…”
“You didn’t eat before you came home?”
“Nope.”
“Aigoo, why didn’t you say something earlier! And why are you eating with your bare hands? Wait right there—I’ll cook for you!”
Our Mrs. Kim promptly kicked me out of the kitchen and got to work. The meal came together in the blink of an eye. When I looked at the table, it was loaded with doenjang jjigae, miyeokguk, kimchi, grilled galchi, rolled omelette, and a steaming bowl of white rice.
“Holy shit, this looks incredible!”
I attacked the food with spoon and chopsticks moving in perfect chaos, scarfing it down like a wild animal. This. This was exactly why I’d come back. Only now did it truly sink in that I had returned to Earth.
“Ugh… what the…”
Ha-im emerged from my room, rubbing her sleepy eyes.
“You’re up.”
“Yeah. The smell woke me up. I want some too.”
Our Mrs. Kim even served a full meal to her gorilla-looking daughter. Before long, the only thing left on the table was a single piece of rolled omelette. Two pairs of chopsticks shot toward it at the same time.
“Put it down.”
“What? You put yours down first, oppa.”
“Can’t you yield to the older brother you haven’t seen in forever?”
“I’ll give it right back. Can’t you yield to the little sister you haven’t seen in forever?”
The bickering showed no signs of stopping until our Manager Lee cut in.
“What’s this? Looks tasty.”
Manager Lee, who had suddenly appeared, snatched the omelette with his bare hand and popped it into his mouth. All we could do was watch in utter despair.
“You’re eating awfully early today.”
“Yeah. Seong-a hadn’t eaten, so I thought you might want some too, honey.”
“I’m fine. I only came out because I was curious.”
Still wearing his running shirt and trunks, Manager Lee shuffled back to the bedroom and immediately fell asleep.
“……”
“……”
We stared at each other. For some reason, we both suddenly felt embarrassed.
After Manager Lee left for work and Mrs. Kim went out to do the grocery shopping, only the two of us remained in the house. But soon it would be just me.
“Where are you going?”
“Where do you think? I got a request, so I’m heading out to handle it.”
“A request?”
“Ah, right. You wouldn’t know.”
Ha-im explained what she did for a living. Two years ago, after she was identified as an Awakener, she had taken a job as a mercenary. It wasn’t anything glamorous—just carrying out requests issued by the Association.
“What’s the job this time?”
“Basically, they want me to take care of monsters crossing the 38th parallel.”
“The 38th parallel… that’s North Korea…”
“Yeah. North Korea’s finished.”
“Wait, seriously?”
Apparently North Korea was one of the countries that had collapsed after failing to respond properly to the initial crisis. Given how full of corrupt politicians it was, the outcome wasn’t surprising. The problem came afterward. The ruined nation had become a breeding ground for monsters that constantly tried to push south. The Korean government was tearing its hair out over it.
“I’ll head out alone—”
“Don’t go.”
“Huh? Out of nowhere? You can’t even watch the house?”
“No. You’re in Great Misfortune today.”
Ha-im gave me a completely dumbfounded look. Had I said something outrageous?
“Are you serious? Just because of that?”
“You’re genuinely in danger today.”
I could see it clearly. Ha-im’s luck was so terrible right now that it was lethal.
“Cancel it immediately. You’ll die if you go.”
“This is ridiculous…”
“Cancel the request.”
“You’re joking—”
“Cancel it.”
“……”
Lee Ha-im felt deeply wronged. Canceling a request over one bad fortune reading made no sense. But the older brother she knew wasn’t the type to joke about something like this.
“Then take responsibility!”
“……?”
“Because of you I canceled my shopping plans with my friends! You’re coming shopping with me!”
Shopping, huh…
“…Fine. Let’s go.”
“Really?”
“Yeah. It’s only one shopping trip to save my little sister’s life. I can manage that.”
I quickly threw on some clothes and got ready. This was all my fault for having such a hopeless younger sister.
“Hurry up.”
Lee Ha-im watched her older brother walk toward the front door from a distance.
Is something actually going to happen today?
It felt strange. The older brother she remembered hated anything troublesome more than anything else. He was definitely not the type to agree to go shopping.
“Aren’t you coming?”
“Y-yeah, I’m coming…”
Ha-im followed behind me awkwardly. Our first stop was the department store.
“I’ve never been to a place like this before. What should I buy first?”
“Underwear. Let’s start there.”
We stepped into the women’s lingerie section. Countless bras and panties were displayed on the racks.
“Do I really have to wear underwear? It looks uncomfortable.”
“Why are you asking the obvious? How about this one?”
My sister held up a flashy black bra. No matter how I looked at it, that was a bit much. I grabbed a plain sports bra instead and showed it to her.
“No way. The second you wear something like that you become a total pervert. I’ll take this one.”
Ha-im let out a long sigh.
“Anyway, the only things in your size are like this. We might as well get you measured while we’re here. Excuse me, can you measure her size?”
“Of course.”
The clerk brought a measuring tape. With no escape, I had my chest measured. The moment the clerk read the number, she let out a gasp of admiration.
“Wow, you’re really big! 75E!”
“Is 75E big?”
When I asked my sister, she gave me a look that said I was pathetic. I was only asking because I didn’t know.
The clerk explained instead.
“Absolutely! Not only is it large, you have a very glamorous figure. These would suit you perfectly.”
She showed me several bras nearby. They were even flashier than the one Ha-im had picked.
“Um… don’t you have anything plainer?”
“Plainer? I’m sorry, but for your size it’s difficult to find plain styles even in other stores.”
It felt like a bolt from the blue. Did I really have to wear things like that?
“Can I wear it and pay at the same time?”
“Yes, that’s possible.”
“Wait, wear it? I can just put it on at home—”
“Put it on right now.”
Ha-im handed me the black bra she had chosen earlier and shoved me into the fitting room.
…Sigh. I guess I have to.
With no other choice, I put on the underwear my sister had given me and stepped out. She was already at the counter paying.
The price…
I craned my neck to see the total. 650,000 won.
“……!”
It was far more expensive than I had imagined. Women’s underwear cost this much?! And Ha-im swiped her card without batting an eye. What kind of twenty-two-year-old casually drops that kind of money?
I grabbed the shopping bag full of underwear and left the store. Just to be sure, I asked.
“Do I need to pay you back for this?”
“It’s fine. I have plenty of money.”
Even if she worked as an Awakener, this seemed like too much spending. I was starting to worry.
“Awakeners must get great benefits.”
“Well, yeah. It’s because of that incident.”
“That incident?”
“Yeah. There was the case where a Korean Returnee defected to America.”
It was known as the Returnee Defection Incident. A normal returnee wouldn’t have become so famous. The defector was none other than the one called the Sword Saint.
“How did that happen?”
“The treatment was absolute shit.”
The Sword Saint had suffered. Terribly. Back then there were no proper laws for returnees or Awakeners, so everything was decided by the whims of those in power. Just as his mind was about to break, the American government reached out.
“Sign here and you can gain American citizenship immediately.”
America promised not to treat him the way Korea had. After that, it was simple. The Sword Saint accepted their offer, fled to the United States with his family, and as a bonus exposed the corruption of Korea’s higher-ups to the public.
“After that, the government must have realized they were screwed because they quickly loosened the laws for Awakeners and Returnees.”
“I see. A lot happened while I was gone.”
Still… the Sword Saint, huh.
There was a Sword Saint on Earth too. It made me think of the little Sword Saint kid from the other world.
I wonder if she’s doing okay. The last news I heard was that she had gone missing.
We moved on to the women’s clothing section and picked out various outfits.
“Skirts are kind of…”
“Wear it. I even canceled work to spend the day with you, oppa.”
“……”
I absolutely did not want to wear a skirt, but my little sister forced me into one anyway. After shopping we left the department store carrying more than ten bags. Ha-im stretched happily and basked in the sunlight.
“Ughhh, canceling that request was totally worth it!”
It took about five hours.
Spending five hours to save my little sister’s life. What incredible value.
“Let’s head home—”
Squelch.
The unmistakable sound of stepping in something disgusting rang out. It wasn’t my shoe. It was Ha-im’s.
“Kyaaaaaaaak!!!”
Ha-im’s face turned deathly pale as she let out a piercing scream. It was so loud I had to cover my ears.
“These are brand new shoes!”
“I told you. You’re in Great Misfortune today.”
“Stop making things up! This is just a coincidence! How is stepping in poop Great Misfortune?!”
Ha-im stubbornly ignored my reading and trudged home in an even gloomier mood than before.
“We’re back.”
The moment I bent down to take off my shoes, the sound of the news came from the living room.
Thud.
At the news report, Ha-im—who had ignored my fortune—began to tremble. The shopping bags slipped from her hands and hit the floor.
As expected, my readings were never wrong.