The Fortune Teller's Deal
Suddenly, a question popped into my head. "But how did you know I was streaming?" I had never mentioned broadcasting, so how could they possibly know? The team leader averted his eyes, looking troubled as he answered.
"Haha, well, you see... We help returnees become self-sufficient, but we also have to make sure they don't cause any problems. That's why we thoroughly investigate their private lives too."
"Whoa... that's actually terrifying." Their private lives? Weren't they basically stalkers?
"Please understand that this is also part of our duties. Of course, you mustn't mention this to other returnees."
I could understand it, but the thought of these two digging into my personal life made me uneasy. "Anyway, the moment the press catches wind of this, it's over."
"The press?"
"Yes. That's why the Association is doing its best to delete any community posts related to you, Miss Seong-a."
They must be working hard. Should I divine the journalists' locations and take them out?
"The good news is that we're on friendly terms with the media outlets, so you don't need to worry."
"Oh, really?" Then I guess I didn't need to kill anyone.
"Do you plan to continue streaming?"
"Yes, I probably should." It would only be once a month, but just in case, I asked, "Is there a problem with that?"
"No. As long as an incident like this doesn't happen again, it'll be fine, and people will forget about it with time."
"Hehe, sorry about that. I'll be more careful from now on."
I knew I shouldn't, but a laugh slipped out anyway. I must have spent too long in that other world; my common sense about Earth had gotten a little dull.
Once the conversation about streaming was over, the team leader pulled a new document from his bag and showed it to me.
"What's this?"
"It's a new contract. Since you're now a very valuable person, Miss Seong-a, shouldn't we treat you accordingly?"
They held out the papers and waited for me to sign. My answer to that was...
"No thanks."
Everyone stared at me. The first to speak was Ha-im.
"Are you crazy? This is the one you're supposed to—"
"Shut up."
"……!"
Lee Ha-im looked flustered. Her older sibling's aura had changed in an instant. It was like a chill had settled over me. A little scary, even.
"Why should I sign this? I thought I already did one before?"
"Haha, like I mentioned earlier, this new one comes with special privileges..."
"Team Leader, if you're going to try to trick me, you'll need to try a lot harder than that."
At those words, Kim Kwon-ho burst out laughing.
"...Puhahaha!!! I can't handle this!!"
Lee Ji-woo sighed as she looked at him. "I told you not to do it."
"But I didn't want to write a report, and you didn't either, right?"
Meanwhile, my idiot little sister wore a completely confused expression. What was I going to do with this girl?
"W-what are you all doing?! Is this some kind of hidden camera prank?"
"Hidden camera my ass. I just caught these people trying to scam me."
"Scam?"
"Team Leader, why don't you explain it?"
"Yes. Understood."
The team leader pulled yet another contract from his bag. It was the one I had signed before.
"There are two types of contracts that returnees sign. The first is for returnees with power similar to ordinary Awakeners. The second is for returnees with power beyond standard specifications."
Hmm, so the one I signed was the left one?
"Where did the other returnees sign?"
"All of them signed the first one."
'I get the picture.'
If a returnee as strong as those from other countries appeared, they would hand the second contract to clueless returnees, hoping to snag them. I could roughly guess what it contained. They planned to control returnees using every legal means possible. It was truly underhanded, but now I understood why they had looked so disappointed when I said I had no combat ability.
"Sigh, anyway, since we messed up, it's report hell for us."
"W-what are we going to do? If we report this to our superiors, won't we get fired?"
It seemed the two of them were now at risk of being fired because of me. Wait a second—if they were talking about reporting to their superiors, did that mean their superiors didn't know about my abilities?
"Um, I have a question. Are you two the entire Returnee Team?"
"Yes, that's correct. It was only recently established."
Perfect.
"How about we make a deal?"
When I explained the deal I had come up with, they both looked intrigued.
"You're asking us not to report your abilities to our superiors? Then what do we get out of it?"
"Anything you want."
Since "anything you want" might be too vague, I explained it simply.
"If you need money, I can tell you about stocks or lottery numbers, just like on my stream."
"If you want to get stronger, I have tools and medicines I brought from the other world. Just say the word."
"If you want happiness, I'll divine your fated partner for you."
I made an offer that no one could refuse. Upon hearing it, Kim Kwon-ho and Lee Ji-woo thought the same thing.
They had never imagined an opportunity like this would come to them. It felt like they had become Paris, courted by three goddesses. Well, not exactly being courted by three goddesses, but striking a deal with one returnee.
The two of them thought it over carefully. In the original story, Paris had chosen love.
"...Alright. Please tell me about some stocks."
"...Please give me the lottery numbers."
But they weren't Paris. As a husband who had to support his family and an eldest daughter who had to raise seven younger siblings, they had to face reality rather than chase romance. Strength and love were nothing in the face of money.
"Good. I'll tell you, so take notes. Don't blame me if you forget."
I gave them information on companies that would grow in the future and six-digit lottery numbers. After the deal was done and we were about to leave the conference room, I gave them one last warning.
"Oh, and if you betray me, be prepared. I'll curse you with everything I've got."
"Ugh! Time to head home now?"
After leaving the Association, I stretched. Since I was done with my business, should I go get some rice cakes?
"...Um, bro, I'm sorry."
"Huh? Suddenly?"
When I turned around, Ha-im was standing there with a face full of guilt. What was with this girl again?
"I, I told you to sign without knowing anything."
"It's fine. You're a new member of society—what would you know?"
Since I hadn't signed it anyway, there was no problem. Even if I had, I could just tear it up. Besides, I had predicted that those two didn't have much money luck in their faces, so a little cash would make them fold.
"Bro, do you really have no combat ability?"
"...Why do you think that?"
"Looking at your abilities, it's hard to believe you have no combat ability..."
As expected of my little sister. I shrugged.
"Why would I tell strangers something like that?"
Hiding information from people you don't know is always beneficial. You never know what might happen.
"Just call a taxi already, you gorilla. It's time for dinner."
"Ugh! I'm letting it slide because I did something wrong...!"
We took a taxi home, and as soon as we arrived, we saw two men who looked like repair technicians.
"Oh dear, you've worked hard. Please have this."
"Ah, you didn't have to, but thank you."
The two repairmen received coffee cups from Mrs. Kim and left the house.
'Did something happen?'
Worried that something big had gone down, I hurried inside.
"What happened? The repairmen were here?"
"Go look at your room."
"My room?"
Did she mean the room that had basically become a storage closet? I went straight in, and my eyes widened in shock.
"What the hell is all this...?"
Inside the room were a soundproof booth, a brand-new computer, gaming equipment, and full streaming gear. When had all this appeared?
"You said you were going to stream, right? I bought everything you'll need. Tell me if you need more."
"Everything?"
The soundproof booth was filled with nothing but expensive items. How much did all this cost?
"How did you even know about all this stuff?"
Mrs. Kim shouldn't know anything about internet streaming?
"If you look it up on the internet, it all comes up."
I never thought there would come a day when I would hate the internet.
"So when's your next stream?"
"Well, about that..."
I knew this was coming. There was no other reason for her to prepare all this.
"In a month...?"
"Hmm~?"
Mrs. Kim was holding a knife.
"...I mean, today?"
"Hmmm~?"
The knife slowly inched closer.
"I'll turn it on today...."
I eventually gave up. They say no parent can win against their child, so why can't I win against my mom...?
Mrs. Kim put down the knife and smiled with satisfaction.
"Good. Streaming requires sincerity. I won't watch you work."
After that, Mrs. Kim went to the kitchen, and I held an emergency meeting with Ha-im.
"Why don't you stream instead?"
"That doesn't even make sense. They'd find out immediately because of my chest size."
"Is that so?"
It was true that men were simple creatures, but they were strangely sensitive about breasts. As a former man, I knew exactly how important breasts were to guys.
"What if I use a compression bandage and pretend to be someone else?"
"Sorry, but even with a compression bandage, that size won't get any smaller."
'Tsk, what a useless lump of meat.'
After becoming a woman, I learned that having big breasts wasn't good for anything. They made my shoulders hurt, were uncomfortable when lying face down, and I couldn't even run properly. I didn't understand why people wanted them.
"Honestly, I don't like you streaming either, bro."
"Right? You should tell Mom..."
"But Mom told you to do it. Hurry up and turn it on."
"......"
What a useless little sister! Later, I'll curse her so she gets hit by bird poop.
"I'll help as your chat moderator, at least."
Fine. Since she was my sister, I'd change the curse from bird poop to dog poop. After Ha-im left the room, I took several deep breaths.
'It's not that big a deal, right?'
I had gone through way worse when fighting the Demon King. Getting nervous over something like this would hurt my pride.
I adjusted the new microphone, camera, and lighting, then pressed the stream button.
'Will I get about a thousand viewers?'
How many people in this country even cared about lotteries, stocks, sports betting, or real estate? A thousand seemed just right.
But contrary to my expectations, the viewer count began skyrocketing within one or two minutes. The number of viewers hit 10,380. That was more than ten times what I had predicted. What were the viewers saying?
It was already overwhelming. How did it end up like this? Oh, right. I needed to ban the bastard who called me a prophet.
"Everyone, please calm down..."
The viewers showed no sign of calming down. Every single message and donation was asking for lottery numbers, stock tips, sports betting picks, or real estate advice.
Creak. Someone opened the door to the soundproof booth. When I turned around, it was Ha-im. Weren't you watching the stream?
"What? Why are you here?"
"Mom says to eat first and stream later."
"It's fine. I'll stream first—"
"It's spam, your favorite."
At the word "spam," I threw off my headset, jumped out of my chair, and headed straight for the kitchen.
I just can't resist spam!