We Should Get Along (4)
When Shuri opened the door, he froze, his soul leaving his body.
Inside, the room was packed full of apprentices clutching their stomachs and rolling around on the floor.
"Isaaaac! Please!"
"Your seniors are begging you like this! Save us, pleaseee!"
Shuri grabbed the back of his neck.
"…Isaac! What the hell did you do this time!"
Isaac picked at his ear, looking bored.
"I didn't do much. I just had them take the Gold Pill and let the side effects kick in."
…Grandfather. I'd honestly rather just go back to the Academy.
Shuri looked ready to tear the wallpaper off the walls, while Whisper ground his teeth in clear displeasure.
[To think you'd share your precious mana with trash like thaaat!! What a waste, Master!]
'Come on, don't be so dramatic. I only gave them a fingernail's worth of dirt.'
In truth, Isaac had laced the Gold Pills with a concentrated extract of the Skeleton Demon King's mana before handing them out.
And to priests, mana was poison. The moment it hit the stomach, it would twist their organs inside out and produce a hideous abdominal pain that felt like everything was about to erupt out of their mouths.
Worse, it had been mixed with an extraordinary elixir that spread through the entire body the instant it was swallowed, multiplying the effect several hundredfold.
The result was the scene unfolding right now. That was all.
"Hrk—HUUURGH!!"
"S-Save me! I need the antidote!"
Isaac clicked his tongue as if they were a bunch of weaklings.
'I diluted the mana extract to a mere one-thousandth, you know. Why are you priests all such drama queens?'
Of course, the Skeleton Demon King's mana was so overwhelmingly potent that even high-ranking demons struggled to digest it. The young apprentices not dropping dead on the spot was already a small miracle.
Whether he knew that or not, Shuri let out a sigh, as if to say this was practically a reformed man's behavior.
"Fine. Fine. Just the fact that you didn't cheat and handed out actual Gold Pills is something, I suppose…"
"Gave them all of it?"
…What?
"Are you insane? Handing that priceless elixir over to these idiots? All of it?"
…WHAT?
Shuri hastily grabbed Isaac in alarm.
"What did you feed them!!"
"The New Gold Pill."
Flour 90% · Skeleton Demon King mana extract 5% · laxative 1% · hair extract 0.5% · Gold Pill 0.0000001%
…In a single word: he had shamelessly shortchanged them by a filthy margin.
No wonder Shuri's eyes were about to roll back into his skull.
"Hey! You're becoming a priest and you lie like that?!"
"I didn't lie! I told you, I put in 0.0000001 percent."
"Damn it! Even a poisoner would have used more than that!"
But Isaac fished a Gold Pill bottle out of his clothes and snickered, puheh.
"Turns out this stuff really is precious, huh. The second I showed them this, every last one of them instantly swore 'I won't betray you.' Didn't see that coming. Should I try fishing with it again next time?"
Ah, Grandfather, you were wrong…. This little bastard has zero intention of ever becoming a priest.
At the same time, the apprentices clutching their bellies couldn't help but grind their teeth as they watched him.
'Damn it…! Eshuaaaa!'
'And here we thought he was a sucker!'
It was fifty minutes before the vote.
Truth be told, back then they had been cheering with delight.
Oh, sure, when Isaac had shown up grinning a puhehe grin alongside Shuri, they'd thought, damn it, did we get caught? And when Isaac had dragged them all into a room—everyone except Shuri—they'd thought, we're screwed. But then, wouldn't you know it.
"Would you boys like to trade this for your votes?"
"!"
They couldn't believe their eyes and ears at the Gold Pill Isaac held out.
A gorgeous box adorned in brilliant gold, wrapped in a band of gold, with letters of light inscribed in Holy Arts.
'Crazy—the secret elixir of the Papal House!'
They wondered if it was a fake, but the Verith family crest engraved on the box, the Shield Crown, looked genuine from every angle!
Isaac's lips curled upward at their reaction.
"Big brothers. You got an offer from the Red faction to betray us, didn't you?"
"?!"
"Relax, relax. I only brought it up because I wanted to make an offer of my own."
The apprentices stared at him, flustered, but he simply rattled the box as if to say, don't you want it?
"An elixir said to raise the user's training by over ten years' worth. You know you can't get this even with money, right? And besides, backing from the Red faction isn't exactly a necessity, is it? So you take the Gold Pill and win the crown. Isn't that the better deal all around?"
"……!"
He was right. It was more than a good deal. Honestly, even throwing in with the Reds wouldn't get them a Gold Pill.
"Th-there's a rumor Kina Berith became a genius after taking that stuff, too…"
The Red offer was fading from their minds, the temptation was that great—but they weren't completely naive.
"The whole continent knows Blue and Gold hate each other! How do you even have that precious secret elixir?"
"Ah, I happen to be on good terms with the Papal House. His Holiness looked favorably on me over the Ordination Ceremony. Kina Berith even invited me to go pay respects to His Holiness together recently, saying we should study together. This is a gift from the Gold faction."
"…R-really? To you?"
"Yeah…. I heard it firsthand. That Kina Berith went looking for him."
"…What?!"
"If you don't believe me, should I go get a written guarantee from Cardinal Verith?"
"……!"
"But there are only twenty minutes left until the vote. I don't have time to fetch a guarantee. If you say no, the deal's off—and you lose the once-in-a-lifetime chance to become the next Kina Berith."
"……!"
Isaac smiled like a ghost luring away the living.
"Not that we're in any hurry. We're people of the Five Great Ducal Houses, remember? Both of us already graduated early, so what would we be lacking or afraid of? But you boys? You'd crawl to the Red faction for patronage, fail to get your hands on a precious elixir, and get branded traitors with House Eshua as your enemy for life. Red's business sponsorship? Frankly, how is that good for you? It's good for your houses and your parents, maybe—but not for you."
"……!!"
At those words, the pupils of the ones who had planned to betray Eshua wavered.
Then Molech, the very first to suggest betrayal, made a surprising counteroffer.
"Then give us the Gold Pill first."
"!"
"Why? You could promise it and then never hand it over later."
Molech had cleverly devised a way to get both the Gold Pill and the Red faction's backing.
'We all agree to his face, swallow the Gold Pill, and then just vote for betrayal. Simple.'
The other boys seemed to catch on to the plan as well.
"Right. It's all about Harmony, isn't it? Prove that we can trust Eshua too."
Isaac beamed.
"Sure, why not. If that's what it takes for you big brothers to trust Eshua. In exchange, I'm giving it to you first, so you will vote 'maintain,' deal?"
At Isaac's innocent little smile, they grinned as if to say, what an idiot.
Well, part of them did consider not taking the elixir and stashing it away to sell later at a markup—but that was operating under the assumption they'd betray him.
Knowing Isaac, he'd claw back every last percent after the betrayal anyway.
In fact, Isaac had said exactly that.
"After everything I've done for you, if you still betray me, I'll reclaim your elixirs and you'll die by my hand."
Ha! Better to swallow it first so it can't be taken back—and scoop up the Red faction's patronage while we're at it. Kill two birds, feast on pheasant.
"Deal! We'll definitely vote 'maintain'!"
"Thank you, big brothers! Shuri will be so happy too!"
Mwahaha! Sucker Eshua strikes again…!
…Or so they'd thought.
The moment the Gold Pill from Isaac hit their stomachs, the tearing agony in their bellies nearly stopped their breath.
"Hk—HURK! Wh-what is this! I definitely felt power surging through my body…!"
"Why does my stomach—!"
"HUUURGH!"
Isaac strolled over and sat down before them, lips curling. The innocently smiling little child was gone; his eyes were ice-cold.
"Hey. You are going to vote 'maintain,' aren't you? Otherwise, no antidote? Figure it out yourselves, yeah?"
"What the hell is wrong with you?!"
"Oh, and if you try running to the infirmary for treatment, I'll tell Niger Sephet everything. How you were so blinded by an elixir that you tried to betray the Reds. Besides, since there's a magic core in there, no one but us Eshuas could cure you anyway."
"?!"
Cold sweat poured down the apprentices' backs.
If they had truly swallowed a magic core, priests capable of treating it were rare indeed outside of Blue, which dealt in the demonic.
They might find one if they turned the entire Holy See upside down—but would they survive this agony long enough to locate an antidote?
Worse, having already eaten it, there was no way to shift the blame onto Niger.
'No, damn it. And before all that—Blue pulls this kind of stunt??'
In the end, there had only ever been one road open to them.
And now.
'Damn it, to think that Eshua would pull something like this…!'
Utterly played by Isaac, they had voted unanimously, and now had no choice but to grovel before him exactly like this.
"UAAAAAGH! Harmony passed, didn't it! Give us the antidoteee—URK!"
"I genuinely can't take anymore!"
"Hmm. Now where did I put it."
"Hey!!"
By this point, they were genuinely afraid of Isaac.
'Ugh, didn't they say this brat swallowed the Skeleton Demon King's bones as a newborn?'
'It must have hurt even worse than this—how did he endure it?'
Their stomachs hurt enough to kill them, and yet somehow that made the little monster all the more respectable in their eyes. Well, he was the kid even the Skeleton Demon King had called a Saint, after all?
"Strange. I'm sure I kept the medicine and antidotes together."
What Isaac fished out one item at a time from his luggage was, of course, a pile of cloth diapers.
"Ah, there it is. The antidote was in here after all."
Oh! He stored medicine in a cloth diaper—kind of gross, but right now he's our salvation incarnate!
Shuri had a word for their savior.
"…Hey. Isn't that the diaper you were wearing at the Ordination Ceremony?"
"It's fine. I didn't soil it, so it's clean."
Damn it! That little bastard isn't a Saint, he's a demon, no question about it!
But at this point, they'd take it. Trembling hands reached out.
"H-hurry, give it…!"
"Please! I'm at my limit!"
"Theeere you go~."
It was the very instant Isaac's small hand extended the antidote.
BANG!
"Give. Back. My. Men?!"
A familiar face came crashing into the Blue Living Quarters.
Striding in through the door, huffing and full of bluster, was a red-haired young man.
Apprentices weren't supposed to wear the colors of their faith—those symbolized their allegiance—but he was decked out in a scarlet uniform, paying the rule about as much mind as he paid the weather.
Taller than his peers, broad-shouldered and built like a trained adult, practically knightlike in bearing, he came looking for one person: Isaac.
"You little shit! What kind of bribe did you feed my men to steal them from me! I won't stand for—hurk!"
He reached for Isaac's collar—and instead, the people around him threw themselves at him like madmen.
"Don't you dare touch Isaac! Lay a finger on him and I won't let you off either!"
"?!"
"That's right, you lunatic! Why do you suddenly barge in and interfere! Damn it! Are you trying to get us killed?!"
"???"
Pinned down, Niger could only gape in confusion, and Shuri, watching the whole spectacle unfold, was struck speechless. Because he had seen, crystal clear, exactly what Isaac had done the moment Niger walked in.
'That scheming little wretch…'
Isaac had been holding the antidote over the fireplace, on the verge of tossing it in.
And every time Niger moved, the vial drifted closer to the flames. Move again, and it inched even deeper toward the fire.
No wonder the victims were clinging to Niger with fire in their eyes.
Isaac approached the utterly immobilized Niger.
"Your men? If you thought about stealing mine, you should've been prepared to have yours stolen too."
"……!"
He seized Niger Sephet by the skull.
"I told you when you told them to betray us, didn't I? That what people really seek at the crucial moment is overwhelming power and authority?"
"!"
Meeting Isaac's crimson eyes dead-on, Niger Sephet flinched and shuddered.
"You were wrong, kiddo. What people really seek at the crucial moment is the string that keeps them alive."
"……!"
Power? Authority?
"Death shows no mercy to anyone, my boy. Not even the mighty."
The smile on Isaac's face was there, but his eyes were cold enough to frost the air.
What flickered in them was neither madness nor recklessness. Something far more distant—an elemental darkness that had transcended even death itself.
That was why Niger Sephet felt a chill run down his spine, all the way to the marrow.
Thud. Thud.
'How can a person's eyes look like that?'
Red was the faith of torture and repentance, and its followers were trained to grow accustomed to fear and agony. As a direct descendant of the Red house, he had drilled it harder than anyone.
So what was this? What on earth was this, that this boy wore eyes more suited to Red than any Red disciple—or something even beyond that?
But Isaac simply curled his lips into a smirk.
"Now that you understand—go fetch everything you promised those boys. The business sponsorship money, the settlement fees, the deed to your house, and your stamp and seal too. Chop chop!"
Is he a priest or a gangster?
"…N-no, that's all fine, just give us the antidote first!"
the apprentices wailed.
Around the same time, in the Papal Court's administrative office.
Knock, knock.
At the sound, the Gold Cardinal rose from his seat as though he'd been waiting for nothing else.
"Enter."
The door opened, and in came the attendants who had been dispatched to fetch Isaac. Apparently, Isaac had arrived.
'Seven whole days, just to see one apprentice.'
Trying to meet without drawing anyone's eyes had meant a long, weary wait—but today, that would finally end.
The Cardinal, irritation simmering beneath his courtesy as he moved to greet his guest, froze mid-step.
He had no choice.
"……."
Nothing.
The door was open, and Isaac was nowhere in sight. All that stood there were the attendants, sweating rivers and casting nervous glances.
"Where is Isaac Eshua?"
"……."
"…He borrowed the Gold Pill from the Papal House, didn't he. That was supposed to bring him here."
He hadn't said what it was for, but it didn't take a genius to guess he'd meant to use it for Harmony. Nothing else could explain Blue coming out with a unanimous vote.
And yet.
"He didn't come?"
"No, Your Eminence."
"He took the pill and then sealed his lips completely?"
"…Yes."
The attendants, heads bowed, looked very close to tears.
"Th-then, Your Eminence… shall we threaten Isaac Eshua? Say he passed Harmony through illegitimate means?"
"No. It wasn't illegitimate."
The Gold Pill was a precious elixir of the Gold faction. If he had used it to win over teammates, that was simply a means of trade—no fraud had been committed.
Cardinal Verith pressed a hand to his brow, a migraine blooming behind his eyes.
"Anything else to report?"
"……."
"Anything else!"
"…W-well! He said to send an even bigger lump of gold next time…!"
Cardinal Verith was at a loss for words.
This… this lunatic is dead serious?
Finally, reaching his absolute limit, he snapped the quill clean in two.