Secret Arts? What's So Hard About That? (5)

The Eshua estate was in an uproar.

"Father, you can't truly mean to go."

Rillai and Benyamin, hot on the heels of the Head of House Blue, had gone white as corpses. Their patriarch was preparing for a journey to the land of the True Demons — and he meant to bring only a single attendant with him.

"That is the very land the Skeleton Demon King once ruled!"

"I know."

"Then at the very least, let me accompany you!"

At Rillai's cry, the Head of the house turned away, as if to say he had no time for pointless objections.

"You must be ready to succeed me if anything happens. Finish mastering the Cardinal's secret arts, and then you can think about adopting Isaac."

The words nearly brought Rillai to his knees. For his father to ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠speak as if he were already preparing his own succession — it could only mean he had no intention of coming back alive from the True Demons' land in the first place.

He would protect Isaac's future while sacrificing himself for the family's. No wonder Rillai felt like he was suffocating.

"You said you trusted Isaac, did you not? You said he would revive the secret arts, and that we should wait and see!"

"I do trust him."

"Then why—"

"I trust his rotten character."

"…Father, I am not in the mood for jokes—"

"Neither am I. With that damnable talent of his, at the very least he won't spend his life cowering before the Pope's faction."

"!"

"Honestly, I suspected something like this would happen the moment we let the Pope's blood into House Eshua."

Why else would the sworn enemies of the family have been welcomed into Eshua in the first place?

When the Skeleton Demon King vanished, a dark age descended upon House Eshua. They were cursed by the Fake Skeleton King; their heirs died off one after another. And the loss of the secret arts became the final spark set to burn the whole family down.

It was in that dark age that the Papal house made its offer: blood.

Wash away the Saintess's blood with the Pope's? Rillai knew perfectly well what a crock of nonsense that was. But Eshua had been desperate enough that, hearing it, they'd had no choice but to swallow it.

And so the previous Head of House Eshua accepted the Pope's proposal, and the Papal bloodline entered the family.

'And from that moment on, the Papal house began devouring Eshua from the inside out.'

Noel was one remnant of exactly that scheme.

The Pope's grip on House Eshua had only been tightening with every passing year. For now, Eli held the family's people in check — but what would happen once the Head of the house was dead?

That was why the shackles had to be severed within his own generation. By the time Isaac took his seat, he wanted to hand him a proper House Eshua.

"If nothing else, reviving the secret arts would mean the lot of you would never have to grovel before anyone again."

"……!"

It meant there would be nothing left for the Pope to hold over them.

'If only the secret arts come back, even that much…'

Then he could finally cast off the duty of being the Head of House Eshua who dragged down the great Eli by the ankles.

"Well, I have no intention of dying easily. Stop worrying so much. Melissa will come while I'm gone, so don't fret over the family either."

"Father!"

After the Head of House Blue departed, Noel — watching the whole scene from a distance — curled the corners of his mouth into a smirk.

"At last, the father who stood in my way is gone."

He'd known the Pope would make his move. But he'd never imagined the maternal side would lend a hand this thoroughly!

'I was planning to poison the old man, if it came to it.'

Truthfully, this worked out even better. Once the Head died, the seat would fall to Noel, and the Pope would hand over the power of the secret arts without a fuss.

And then he would begin his reign — engraved in history as the first patriarch to save House Eshua!

But as Noel smiled, his attendant looked at him with worry etched across his face.

"The Head of the house might yet return alive from the True Demons' land."

"Do you have any idea what kind of place that is?"

It was the land of the Skeleton Demon King himself. It was where that insufferable eldest son and the Saintess had vanished together. A place from which no human being had ever come back alive.

"Without the secret arts, he couldn't survive a day there."

"And if Young Master Isaac revives the secret arts? Would the situation not be reversed?"

Noel burst out laughing. Pfft.

"Revive the secret arts? Absurd."

The secret arts had been lost through someone's scheme in the first place. How could they possibly resurface?

Granted, Isaac's utter confidence had thrown him off for a moment. But still.

"Even Matriarch Melissa failed at that. Do you have any idea who Melissa Eshua is?"

She had been a genius among all the Saintesses in history.

And even she had never fully revived the secret arts — because the most crucial piece was missing.

In a word, it had been a half-finished secret art.

"A shaky half-finished art — and even that, no one has ever managed to activate. The brat's just talking out of his ass."

Yes. That was how it had to be.

The Goddess of Light was weeping.

Sob. Sob.

And Shuri, staring up at the crying goddess, had no idea what to do with himself.

"My Lady, why are you crying?!"

"Why am I crying, you ask."

"!"

The one who answered Shuri's question was not the goddess.

No — it was Isaac who had answered, standing there side by side with the Skeleton Demon King… wait. The Skeleton Demon King?!

Isaac, standing beside the Skeleton Demon King, beamed sweetly.

"Now, Kkuri-Shuri, say hello. This is our Eshua's new guardian deity — the Skeleton Demon King. From this day forward, the Skeleton Demon King will be watching over House Eshua."

"AAAAAHHH!!!"

Shuri shot upright, screaming.

'Damn it all — it was a dream?!'

But the dream had been so vivid, so horribly realistic, that goosebumps crawled up his skin.

Isaac, a dark priest serving the Skeleton Demon King! It fit him so well it was terrifying…….

"Oh. You're awake."

"AAAAHH!"

Seeing Isaac's face, Shuri screamed a second time.

"Damn it! The Skeleton Demon King! Where's the Skeleton Demon King?! Show yourself right now! I'll crack your skull ope— khk!"

"Guess the little pest hasn't come to his senses yet."

Struck by the rattle, Shuri clutched his head.

"This isn't the prayer hall… looks like the estate. When did I get here…?"

"You were out cold, so I had the Pope's grandson carry you here. He healed you up while he was at it."

"What? Kina?"

He turned his head — and there was Kina, seated by the window, glaring daggers at him.

Why on earth would I, and not Isaac, treat the likes of HIM… her eyes said. He should be grateful I let his filthy body use my divine power at all.

Sensing that engaging her would only end in a migraine, Shuri turned to Isaac instead.

"Why did I pass out?"

"You don't even remember? You summoned the God of Blue and then keeled over."

Shuri shrieked and bolted upright.

"Right! The God of Blue! I summoned the God of Blue! So — did His Eminence say anything?!"

"Oh, He said something important, all right."

At Isaac's smile, Shuri grabbed his head with both hands.

"Summoning a god and then fainting — the shame of it! And an important message? What did He say? Something like how to become a Saint… or some momentous duty of House Eshua……."

"Yep. He said that from now on, everything in House Eshua follows my word."

…Huh?

Shuri stared at Isaac as if he'd lost his mind.

"…What did you just say?"

"The Goddess of Light said She'll be sending me revelations from now on, and that you're to obey everything I say."

Somewhere, distantly, the sound of the Goddess of Light wailing could be heard, but Isaac paid it no mind whatsoever.

'Well, what can She do? If She wants to be rescued, She has to help me.'

But Shuri, sharp-eyed as ever at the worst possible moments, caught it instantly.

"Obey… YOU? For real???"

The Goddess of Light — a God of Justice?

Truly?

She told us to follow the word of THIS little bastard?!

"That's impossib— khk!"

Isaac, who had just pulled out his whip, next produced a feather and held it up.

"As proof that you're to follow me, She gave me this feather."

"Grandfather, and you too — all you need to do now is follow my revelations."

"…For real??"

At those words, Kina, standing nearby, clicked her tongue inwardly.

'Obviously it's a lie.'

Why would a god who already had a contractor bother issuing revelations to some other attendant?

Shuri apparently found it strange too, because he turned and asked Kina directly.

He asked because she, bearer of the secret art that summoned gods, knew more about the divine than anyone else in the Gold Faith.

"Is that true? Is that even possible?"

Kina sighed. Honestly, if word got out that Isaac — already contracted to two Upper Gods — was also receiving revelations from the God of Blue, all hell would break loose. It would be a catastrophe far too great for the Gold Faith to bear.

Speaking purely for her own interests, Kina wanted Isaac to become one of the Gold Faith's own.

"Of course n—"

"Oh, you know what, it's been a while. Let's have a study session with a Berith for old times' sake."

At Isaac's words, Kina's eyes changed.

"Can't you believe people when they open their mouths and TALK? Of course it's possible! Even I know you're more fit to be Head of House Eshua than the likes of HIM! The God of Blue has acknowledged it! How oblivious can you be?!"

"Um… you were literally about to say it wasn't……."

"My word is one and the same as the will of His Holiness the Pope!"

"……."

It's real?

It's actually real? Huh?

But Isaac looked at Kina with dissatisfaction.

"By the way. Why are you still hanging around the Eshua estate instead of going home?"

Kina fell silent.

'Why do you think? Because of the Head of House Blue, obviously.'

Kina, who had been wearing an expression like she'd bitten into something foul, straightened her back and declared:

"The Head of House Blue is departing for the land of the True Demons. Until then, he's ordered you to train with your rival — that would be me."

"What?"

"You see? Even the Head of House Blue acknowledges it. I alone am your one and only……."

"Ugh, Old Man, why are you so damn impatient! Hey, Kkuri-Shuri! Come on! We're leaving, right now!"

"?!"

Kina hurriedly called after Isaac, but he brushed her off like a stray dog and walked out of the room.

"I'm going to go wake the secret arts up. Starting right now."

Shuri's face went stiff with disbelief. No — this lunatic had said the same thing to Uncle Noel, and now…….

"I'm telling you, it's impossible."

"You've got the God of Blue's power on your side. What's impossible about it?"

"Even with a god's power—! The secret arts themselves were lost — there's no original text left! And the little bit that was restored is useless ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠because the core is missing!"

"Nope. It wasn't lost."

"What?"

"Not that you lot could ever ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠have found it. Even if someone handed it to you, you couldn't have read it."

"What??"

What on earth is he talking about??

Isaac walked into his own room and began pulling things out of the closet, one after another.

"Let's see… it should be around here somewhere."

Shuri, who had been wondering what on earth Isaac was digging out, watched his face crumple in horror. Fine — okay — the lunatic was suddenly pulling a diaper out of the closet, he could live with that, but…….

What.

What is that. Objects coming out of the diaper — one, two, three… what? Why do they KEEP coming out?

'Those are — no matter how I look at it — the stolen Eshua relics, aren't they? Some of that stuff I lost myself??'

No. That wasn't the point.

"What is that BOOK?!"

Out came a single musty, fusty old tome. Naturally, not a single word on its cover could be deciphered.

"What in the world is this antique—"

"The Grimoire."

"What? The Grimoire?"

"Yep. The lost Grimoire of the Blue Secret Arts."

…What?

"Why was that IN THERE?!"

"Why do you think?! It's a dimensional diaper!"

No, that is NOT what I'm asking, you little—!!