Might As Well Use the Rattle (1)
Joseph Eschua. He was the son of the second son, Benjamin Eschua — and the amusing thing was that, just like Isaac, he absolutely despised House Eschua.
Damn Saint family.
Everyone else never stopped gushing at Joseph — "You're the twin brother of a Saintess, how lucky can you get?" — but really.
Lucky? Like hell! Goddammit!
Whatever he did, his twin the Saintess overshadowed him. Fine, he could live with that much. But House Eschua?
Disgusting!
Oh, he was born with Eschua blood, sure — good looks, a famous name, a sterling reputation, a comfortable fortune! And thanks to all that, women never left him alone. So what good was any of it?
"Joseph! Woman troubles again? The name of Blue is weeping!"
"Oh, come on, I didn't touch any married women! Can't a man even date?!"
"I told you, no extravagance!"
"Buying one measly gem and handing it out as a gift is extravagance?!"
That accursed tradition of Blue! Living like a monk — is that any way for a person to live?
And his father was no better!
The man wasn't even going to be head of the household, yet there he sat, single-handedly filling the role of the missing eldest son and serving the family with unflagging loyalty!
So yes — his father irritated him, and the traditions of Blue disgusted him. But when it came to the seat of Head of House, that was a different story entirely!
Cardinal! The seat of supreme power!
And not just any cardinalship — the seat of Blue!
A position the other faiths, even the Papal House, were salivating to devour for themselves!
And now, a chance at the headship he'd thought he'd never see in his lifetime had come waltzing back around?
Well, don't mind if I do!
That was why Joseph couldn't take his eyes off Shuri.
Why?
Because with Shuri, he could breeze through the trials required to become head of the house!
"Hey, Shuri Eschua. Summon the God of Light you contracted with. That's the Blue faith's chief god, isn't it?"
At his cousin's words, Shuri could only stare at him in disbelief.
Shuri knew exactly why this guy was coming at him.
Win the recognition of the God of Blue.
That mandate, in other words, meant summon the god first. And did gods come running just because you called?
Only if you kept the doctrines of Blue… in short, you had to shun all worldly pleasures and keep your body and soul spotless before the god would deign to answer.
"What Grandfather told us was to live a faithful life. To follow the doctrines of Blue and pray to the god."
In a word: start with the basics.
But.
"Who doesn't know that?"
"……!"
"Isn't the God of Blue a bit of a stick-in-the-mud? Even keeping the doctrine is a chore. To have a single encounter with the God of Blue, you have to live as a monk eating nothing but porridge for a whole month."
Shuri immediately saw where Joseph was going with this.
And sure enough—
"Shuri. All you have to do is summon the God of Blue for your big brother here. Just for a moment."
Right. Meaning he didn't want to do the ascetic training himself.
"Shut up and summon him. I'll handle the rest. It's not like the god will answer if he doesn't want to."
"Why don't you summon him yourself?"
"Oh? Little Shuri's all grown up now, huh? If your brother tells you to call, you call. Are you talking back to me now?"
"…….!"
"Didn't I tell you? Don't go around playing Eschua with that brown hair."
Joseph draped an arm around Shuri's shoulders, his voice silky but his presence suffocating.
"Know your place. A nobody even the Papal House won't acknowledge — you should be grateful we let you stay here at all. Don't be a burden to House Eschua. When your older brother speaks, you listen. Did a bit of showing off at the Pentagons and now your head's gotten too big?"
Shuri gritted his teeth.
Telling his father about this kind of thing would only wound him, and resisting would only stir up pointless strife.
So every single time, he had swallowed it down and churned it in silence.
Shuri, it'll all be resolved when you become head of the house. Just endure it until then.
It wasn't as if this treatment of an outsider and his powerless father was anything new…
"Hey. Are you deaf or someth—urk!"
In that instant, Joseph was sent flying sideways before Shuri's very eyes.
It was a whip.
Joseph went sailing as if he'd been struck by a massive slab of steel.
"Keugh!"
At the same moment, the boy twirling the leather whip's lash cracked a grin.
"You son of a bitch. Who the hell do you think you're touching right now?"
"Isaac…!"
Isaac was angrier than anyone had ever seen him.
A blazing fury, as if to say: how dare you lay a hand on what is mine.
Seeing a side of Isaac he'd never witnessed before, Shuri was, inwardly, deeply moved.
Yes. See? He's ferocious and savage as all hell, but he looks out for me—
"Hey! I called dibs on the God of Light first!!"
…looks out for me…
"Who do you think you are, cutting in line?! Kim-Shuri has to summon the God of Light for ME! I'm going to be head of the house!"
Dammit… of course. Should've known.
Deflated, Shuri covered his face and muttered.
"…Isaac… that's a loophole too. You're not supposed to do that…"
"How dare you covet what I laid claim to first?!"
…The little brat doesn't listen at all.
"And on top of that, you don't even keep the Eschua doctrine — you, a man of Blue, would stoop to such a sneaky little trick just because you want to be head of the house?"
"Wait, YOU were about to pull the same trick! You don't get to say that!"
"How dare you think the exact same thoughts as me!"
…This lunatic.
Meanwhile, the actual victim of the whipping, Joseph, clutched his head, his vision swimming.
Something hot was trickling down from his head… wait. Was that blood?
He was bleeding?! This body — blessed by a Saintess's blood, shrugging off nearly every attack thrown at it?!
They ignored my special constitution? THAT thing did?
Just as Shuri could see what others couldn't, each of the direct male heirs of House Eschua possessed his own peculiar power.
Modest next to a Saintess's, granted — but overwhelming to ordinary people. It was no accident that they were so prized as sons-in-law, no accident that they were the ones entrusted with hunting down the Skeleton Demon King.
Which was why Joseph could only gape at Isaac in stunned disbelief.
Dammit. Who the hell is this kid, making ME bleed?
No — wait, the blood wasn't the point!
A whip?? H-how does an Eschua even use something like that?
The proud House Eschua dueled with swords, as a rule. Yes — there was simply no way they'd stoop to such a vulgar weapon…
CRACK!
"Ha! See, the problem was trying to settle this with words in the first place. As our ancestors always said — conversation of the body is the highest form of communication."
That conversation did NOT mean THAT kind!
"Shall we have ourselves a heated exchange, Joseph? Kim-Joseph?"
He's insane. Those eyes are completely unhinged!
Joseph stared at him, flustered.
"Isaac. Do you even know who I am? I'm your older broth—"
"So what if I'm your damn brother?"
The whip was already flying before the word had left his mouth.
CRACK! CRACK!
Sparks burst before Joseph's eyes.
"Keugh!"
"Eschua is MINE, you bastard!"
Joseph screamed.
That whip was, in composition, none other than the golden rattle — meaning it was metal.
Which was to say…
Dammit, what is this power?!
It meant it hurt like absolute hell.
Finally, Joseph could take no more and drew his own sword. Raised alongside a Saintess, his swordsmanship was top-tier in its own right.
"If this were a proper duel I might lo—OW! OW!"
CRACK! CRACK!
Top-tier or not, Isaac gave him no opening whatsoever, laying into him mercilessly.
You little — he's layered holy arts on the ground!
Joseph realized the floor he stood on had turned to mud beneath him.
And the whip itself was laden with buff after buff of divine blessings…
"DIE, Eschua!!"
Die?! You're an Eschua yourself, you idiot?!
At last, Joseph screamed desperately toward Shuri.
"Shuri! Get this maniac off me!"
Shuri just looked exhausted, as if to say: and now I have to deal with this circus too.
"Isaac!! Didn't I tell you not to use that hideous thing?! People are already talking about the succession — have some consideration for how this looks!"
At that, Isaac seemed to go ah, caught off guard.
"Right. If you want to be head of the house, you have to think of your dignity."
Image matters. I've been behaving like a complete thug.
Isaac promptly reshaped the whip.
The golden lash, previously a cord, transformed into something like a rod. How to put it — the kind of thing you could use to swat flies and other pests.
A flexible shaft that bent with a nice spring to it, capped at the tip with a flat metal plate.
A riding crop? Yes — the thing you'd see in equestrian sports.
"Kim-Joseph, take this as a lesson from me! HYA!"
Shuri, having apparently reached some existential crisis, stared up at the sky.
…No. Honestly, just hit him with the rattle.
"Wow, your face is a disaster. Seriously ugly."
"Is that all you ever have to say?! Leah!"
Bloody and swollen like a ripening fruit, Joseph roared at the twins.
But Leah only smiled sweetly.
She was the Saintess who had come looking for Isaac alongside Melissa back during the Pentagons.
"You brought it on yourself. Besides, wasn't Isaac actually going easy on you? Skin torn off heals in no time."
Joseph was left speechless by how brazenly she took Isaac's side.
They said you couldn't trust a Saintess — total lunatics… no wait, whose side was this girl even on to begin with?
"Since when have you ever cared about another living soul? Why are you taking HIS side!"
But Leah ignored him and turned to thank Isaac.
"Thanks for smacking down Uncle Noel. The Saintesses can't stand him."
"Leah! Your own brother just got hurt because of him!"
"Isaac, is there anything you need? Big sis will get it for you."
But Isaac, busy picking at his ear, simply pointed at Joseph.
"Anyway, I beat this bastard, so summon the God of Blue for me, Kim-Shuri."
"My opinion doesn't matter at all, does it!"
"What? Wasn't the whole point that you'd summon him for me?"
This guy??
"You think I'd tolerate a cheap trick like that?!"
At Shuri's words, Isaac let out a long, long sigh.
"Hey. Kim-Shuri. You think I'm telling you to summon the God of Light without a plan?"
"Yeah. Pretty much."
This little…
"He keeps showing up in your dreams, doesn't he? The God of Light. Saying it's so dark in here, that he's trapped. The God of Light IS the Supreme God who governs Blue, isn't he?"
"Ah…"
Shuri let out a groan.
The truth was, the closer they'd come to the family estate, the stranger his dreams had grown.
Help me… help me. It's dangerous there, seedling. You have to run, quickly… Fragments like that, drifting up from somewhere deep.
And he had only ever told Isaac about them.
She's the only goddess among them I'd call friendly, I suppose.
The one god who had blocked every attempt by the pantheon to harm the Skeleton Demon King — and, truthfully, the only deity Isaac had ever thought well of.
"It is strange, though. For a hundred and fifty years, the God of Light sent no revelations to Blue at all. And Grandfather is already contracted with a different god. And now, of all people, he's chosen ME…"
At that, Whisper gave a dry little laugh.
[Honestly, it IS unusual — a goddess of the God of Light's caliber contracting with a nobody like Shuri.]
Isaac smirked at Whisper's words.
She probably chose Shuri out of sheer desperation — the only option she had left.
[I beg your pardon?]
She got trapped in a bug instead of me. I'd bet anything it's the God of Blue.
[What?!]
Isaac turned to Shuri.
"Right, enough. From this moment on, you do exactly as I say."
Subjugate the God of Blue, become head of the house and swallow Eschua whole, reclaim the family's power, and crush the Papal House beneath it.
At those words, Whisper sounded startled.
[Don't tell me — you mean to free him?]
I do feel a little guilty about it. So let's just watch how things play out first. Staying in the jail cell only, of course?
[Shall we offer him the deal?]
If he refuses, we wipe out House Eschua. Simple as that. Puhet!