A Match Made in Madness

"I heard you were a human adventurer who achieved great deeds, but to think you possessed such touching consideration... Perhaps you have a bit of an elf's heart within you."

He was called an Orc-like human by Orcs, an Elf-like human by Elves, and a Goblin-like human by Goblins... Everywhere Tae-hyun went, every race claimed, "You're just like one of us!" Regardless, it meant he had chosen the perfect gift. Thanks to that, his task had just become several times easier.

"Your Grace. I have long admired you for the valorous way you sweep away those Orcs! As someone who has also fought Orcs my entire life, I have always yearned to meet you..."

Indeed, Tae-hyun wasn't lying. There were few players who had taken down as many named Orc bosses as he had!

"!?"

An effect so potent it shocked even Tae-hyun! As if struck by love at first sight, Gellendel had taken an immense liking to him.

"I like you immensely! Shall we go out together and smash some Orc skulls?"

There was nothing more mismatched than a slender Elf Duke twirling a battleaxe while spouting such words. Tae-hyun quickly steered the conversation. Now that he had won the Duke's favor, the priority was gathering information.

"Your Grace, I understand you came to the Espa Kingdom to conquer this territory. However, the land of Espa is barren, so..."

"No, I didn't?"

"?"

The Duke flatly denied it. Tae-hyun was taken aback. It's not? Then why on earth did he bring Elf knights and even recruit players?

"I just came here because I wanted to split some Orc skulls."

"..."

Was this guy an Orc or an Elf? Even among Orcs, few lived so purely true to their primal desires.

Unbothered, the Duke continued. "Look closely. If we set up a fortress here, we can launch attacks from this point all the way to that point."

"To attack and conquer...?"

"Huh? No. I told you, I'm just going to split those Orc bastards' skulls."

...

Tae-hyun was finally certain. He had been misled at first by the man's handsome face, but...

This Duke is completely out of his mind!

Elf Duke Gellendel was simply insane. Once he accepted that, everything made sense.

Right. In that case...

To deal with a madman, one had to speak the language of madness. Tae-hyun readily chimed in.

"An absolutely brilliant idea! That way, you can smash even more Orc skulls!"

"Right? I ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠knew you'd love it. The moment I laid eyes on you, I had a feeling."

"...?"

"A feeling that you, too, love smashing Orc skulls as much as I do. Ahem. Saying it out loud makes me a bit embarrassed."

Gellendel actually blushed with bashfulness! Tae-hyun almost looked at him like he was a lunatic, but quickly controlled his expression.

Patience. Just endure it.

Being treated as a kindred spirit by a guy like this felt incredibly bizarre.

Regardless, Gellendel kept singing Tae-hyun's praises. Anyone watching would think he was confessing his love!

"Don't misunderstand me. I am not an Elf who says such things lightly. But... looking at you, I felt compelled to say it. Won't you join me in smashing Orc skulls?"

What kind of ominous quest is this?

The description practically screamed, "If you refuse, the Elf Duke might split your skull instead of an Orc's." Tae-hyun's brain spun at maximum speed. How could he exploit this situation and these elements?

"Your Grace!"

"?"

"I, too, wish to go and smash Orc ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠skulls. However, the Orcs here have absolutely no backbone. From what I've gathered, they are already planning to run away."

"What? No!" The Duke jumped up in outrage. Running away? Where did they think they were going! "Unacceptable, absolutely unacceptable! Fleeing? They must fight to the bitter end!"

"It is the truth. The Orcs here are cowards; they are already trying to flee just from hearing Your Grace's fearsome reputation. Besides, didn't one of their chieftains already die?"

"Ah. That fellow."

"Your Grace. If you truly wish to smash Orc skulls, there is another place."

"Where?"

"Right here."

The Dungland Kingdom was an island nation located northwest of the Central Continent. If one traveled straight south past the Erangs Kingdom, they would reach the ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠Espa Kingdom. But if they went east...

The Salz Kingdom, the Auston Kingdom, and the Uruk Region!

Tae-hyun pointed to a port city in the Auston Kingdom. It bordered the northern sea, and crossing a single mountain range to the east would lead directly into the Uruk Region.

"Here? Are there Orcs here?"

"There are! And what lies right next to it? The Uruk Region. It is crawling with Orcs! The Orcs there are incredibly fierce and stubborn. They will never run away!"

Tae-hyun had only one goal: to drop a massive bomb right onto the Auston Kingdom, which was currently occupied by the Guild Alliance!

"Your Grace. While we can easily land at the northern port cities of the Salz Kingdom or the Auston Kingdom, the Uruk Region is blocked by a protruding landmass and islands, making a direct approach difficult. Why don't we first seize the nearest city and sweep away all the Orcs in the vicinity?"

"Hmm... The Orcs of the Uruk Region certainly sound enticing. And to think there are so many of them... But isn't this the territory of the Auston Kingdom?"

The Espa Kingdom was a kingdom in name only; in reality, it was a coalition of Orc tribes. A Duke who despised Orcs wouldn't care about invading such a place. In contrast, the Salz Kingdom and the Auston Kingdom were proper nations. He couldn't just trespass on their lands without a care.

"Hasn't the royal family of Auston been driven out by rebels? Why should you fear mere traitors? They are dishonorable humans!"

"Mmm. That is true... But aren't you a human as well—"

"Your Grace. Are you perhaps... afraid?"

"What?!"

The Duke flared with rage. For a man like him, there was no tool more effective than a direct provocation.

"Me, feeling fear? Never! Such a thing is impossible!"

"Exactly. There is no way Your Grace would ever fear the rebels of the Auston Kingdom."

"But there are many logistical issues... First, I must transport my soldiers and the adventurers who came here all the way over there. It is a long distance, so we will need a vast number of ships."

"I will provide them for you."

"?!"

"If it means we can smash Orc skulls, there is nothing I wouldn't do!"

"My friend... Why have I only met you now!" Gellendel cried out, gazing at Tae-hyun with deep, emotional eyes. "However, let us wait a moment."

"Pardon?"

"The Orcs here might not run away after all. I do not wish to be the kind of Elf who neglects the Orcs right in front of him for the sake of those far away."

What kind of nonsense is he spouting now...

Tae-hyun thought to himself, but he simply nodded. He was planning to make the Orcs retreat anyway.

"I have a secret strategy!"

"Chwiik! Human adventurer! Amazing! What is this secret strategy?!"

"We retreat!"

A heavy silence fell.

Orcs despised even the mere mention of the word "retreat"! Tae-hyun patiently set about persuading them.

"Now, think about this carefully. Right now..."

"Chwik. Hearing the human adventurer's words, it actually sounds quite reasonable."

"...I haven't even started explaining yet?"

"Chwiik. My apologies. You just looked so trustworthy, human adventurer, that I spoke too soon."

"Chwik. Me too."

His charm was radiating even in a council of Orc chieftains! Tae-hyun cleared his throat and continued his explanation.

"If we pull back now, those arrogant Elves will surely pursue us in high spirits. The only reason those Elves are doing so well right now is because they are cowardly hiding behind their fortress walls, isn't that right?"

"Chwik! That's right!"

"And what if those fortress walls are gone?"

"Chwiik! The Elves are nothing but prey to us!"

"Exactly!"

It didn't even take long. Having finished persuading the chieftains, Tae-hyun returned to where his party was waiting. In the meantime, Cain looked completely drained of energy.

"Please... do something about these guys! They won't listen to a single word I say!"

Without sufficient reputation or affinity, managing an Orc tribe was practically impossible. The Orcs would get angry, grumble, and oppose absolutely everything he said!

"Don't worry, Cain. Everything has been sorted out."

"Did you go and plant bombs? As expected..." Cain stared at Tae-hyun with a look that said, That's our Kim Tae-hyun. For someone like Tae-hyun, that was just the bare minimum!

"No. I was going to, but I changed my mind. We're taking them with us to the Auston Kingdom."

"????"

Cain couldn't immediately process the sudden shift in plans.

"Did I hear that wrong?"

"No, I heard it clearly too."

"You definitely heard right."

"We need to secure ships right now. Let's mobilize ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠everything we have, starting with the vessels in our territory."

Fortunately, Tae-hyun had plenty of ships at his disposal. Admiral Brangsong, who commanded the fleet of the Atali Kingdom, was an NPC fiercely loyal to him. He also had the vessels of the McCraney Merchant Group, as well as the pirate ships acquired after absorbing the local pirates. In terms of naval power, he was far better equipped than any land army!

"Oh, right. I should ask the Elder as well."

I wonder what he's up to these days? With that thought, Tae-hyun contacted Chairman Yoo.

Chairman Yoo was currently enjoying a thrilling extreme sport. Fishing, of course. It was just that his targets happened to be incredibly dangerous, colossal monsters!

Indeed, power is the ultimate answer!

The position of a kingdom's sovereign was truly magnificent. Famous ranker fishermen would actively seek him out, asking to play alongside him. They came to him first, without him having to spend a single penny!

With Yuseong Gaming thriving in the real world and his kingdom of fishermen flourishing in-game, everything was perfect... until Tae-hyun's whisper shattered the peace.

Chairman Yoo was now a seasoned veteran in PANON. He wasn't about to be easily swayed like before.

Thump!

Despite his age, Chairman Yoo felt his heart skip a beat. A custom-made fishing rod. What an incredibly heart-fluttering phrase!

He loves it.

Tae-hyun immediately caught the slight tremor in Chairman Yoo's voice.

That was a bit much. Since Chairman Yoo didn't know Tae-hyun's full track record, he scoffed at the claim. No matter how much he hyped it up, that was just ridiculous!