Chapter 54
Chapter 54
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Translator: MadScientist
Chapter: 54
Chapter Title: Being Honest is Easier - 2
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“So… did you train well?”
“Didn’t do much. Not today.”
“...Is that so?”
“Yeah.”
I answered while setting the table in response to Ji-woo’s question as she cooked. Just like almost every other day, Ji-woo had come to my house today to practice cooking and make my daily meals, but…
Ji-woo had been glancing at me strangely for a while now.
...What, why.
“Here, it’s ready.”
“Ah… thanks.”
I moved the steaming pasta Ji-woo handed me to the dining table and sat down. Soon after, Ji-woo took off her apron, washed her hands, and sat down in front of me.
I found myself staring blankly at her before I realized it…
“What are you doing? Eat up before it gets cold.”
“...Ah, right.”
I lowered my gaze and picked up my fork.
...Ah, seriously.
I feel so awkward for no reason because of my sunbaes.
I don’t know why, but… I just feel a bit awkward.
And of course, my dad has to be busy and come home late right at a time like this…
“Ack, hot!”
“Hey, hey! Are you okay? No, you have to blow on it before you eat!”
“Ugh… I-it’s okay.”
Lost in thought, I mindlessly put the pasta in my mouth and immediately spat it all back out.
Ah, it’s hot…
“Here, water! Are you okay? Did you burn your mouth?”
“Ah, no… I’m fine…”
“No, I told you to eat it after blowing on it! Why would you put something that hot right in your mouth! Are you really okay?”
“...I’m really okay.”
Ji-woo hastily scooped up some water for me to rinse my mouth with.
Luckily, it doesn’t seem like I burned myself, but…
Ha, seriously, what am I even doing.
“Can you still eat? Blow on it first.”
“Uh…”
“Good grief. I thought you’d grown up a bit lately, but you’re still a baby. Should I blow on it for you?”
“...I’m good.”
When I said I was fine, Ji-woo finally started giggling, and I buried my head and blew on the innocent pasta.
...This is so embarrassing.
I can feel my face burning, so I can’t lift my head.
That’s why I’m eating with my nose practically buried in my plate when a thought suddenly crosses my mind.
Why is this so embarrassing?
It’s normal to spit out food if it’s too hot. It’s not a big deal, so why am I so embarrassed I can’t even lift my head?
“...”
I kept my head down and only glanced up at Ji-woo.
Ji-woo, who doesn’t pay attention to anything but her food when she’s eating. She eats so heartily.
Sometimes at school, you see girls like that.
Girls who eat very elegantly.
When they eat pasta, they always twirl it perfectly on their fork, and they take tiny scoops of rice. They wipe their mouth with a napkin after every single bite.
In comparison, Ji-woo… well.
She eats very heartily.
But because of that, it’s much nicer to watch.
“...What?”
“Huh? Ah, nothing. Eat up.”
“...?”
Oh no. Our eyes met.
I flinched and lowered my eyes again, poking the pasta with my fork.
As I did, I thought to myself.
Why is it so hard for me to show my true self?
Thinking about it, I’ve hardly ever shown Ji-woo my true, honest self.
I’d pretend not to be scared even when I was. I’d pretend things were fine even when they weren’t. Not only was I not honest, but I lied all the time.
Actually, it’s not just in front of Ji-woo.
Looking back, I’ve never truly opened up my heart to anyone as it is.
I’ve said I liked things even when I hated them, but I’ve never said I hated something just because I hated it.
It was just… how things were.
My feelings and emotions were less important than the feelings of others. The thought of making someone uncomfortable because of me was even more uncomfortable for me.
Maybe that’s why. Being honest was a difficult thing for me.
When did that start?
Suddenly, I pondered what the first lie I ever told was.
Well…
It might not be accurate, but the first lie I can think of right now was… to my mom.
It was probably the second day I was going to school after enrolling in elementary school.
That morning, my mom asked me if I didn’t want to go to school again today.
I said no.
The day before, I had come home from school and said I didn’t want to go anymore, and I got a huge scolding.
I was afraid I’d get scolded again, so I couldn’t answer honestly, and that’s how I told my first lie.
Well, once you’ve told one lie, the second one isn’t so hard. It even became easier to lie than to be honest.
Especially… I lied to my dad a lot.
He always told me to talk to him if I was worried or having a hard time, but I always said nothing was wrong.
A lie is a lie.
So I feel sorry towards my dad.
Well, anyway…
How did I end up thinking about this?
Ah, right.
Why can’t I show my true self?
Ji-woo eats like that, showing her true self… and it looks good on her, so why do I only try to look perfect?
That’s a tough question.
"Be honest with your heart. Then, the one who becomes comfortable is you."
Suddenly, what Kang-jeong said earlier came to mind.
Hmm. Thinking about it, that sounds about right.
I’ve lived uncomfortably because I wasn’t honest.
I want to live a little more comfortably now too.
“...This.”
“Hm?”
“This, you know.”
“Yeah. What? Is it not good?”
When I pointed at the pasta with my fork and spoke, Ji-woo asked, her eyes wide.
I shook my head.
“No. It’s because it’s delicious.”
“What’s with you all of a sudden? Of course, everything I make for you is delicious.”
“Th-that’s right. Everything you make… is delicious. So, I’m always grateful for that.”
“...Huh?”
“You always cheer me on… and you make me food like this… so I’m always thankful to you… I was just saying…”
...Why is it so hard to get the words out, like my throat is blocked?
As I mumbled, Ji-woo tilted her head and looked at me, her eyes still wide open.
She had a look on her face like, ‘Did he eat something weird?’
“...Did you do something wrong?”
“Huh?”
“Why are you suddenly acting like this? Tell me. You did something wrong, didn’t you?”
“What are you talking about? No, it’s not that…”
“Then why are you suddenly like this? You’re giving me goosebumps.”
“I just… I just wanted to say it…”
It took even courage just to say this much, so I mumbled and buried my head again.
Ugh. This is uncomfortable.
I shouldn’t have said anything.
But, a moment later, I felt something touch my head. It was Ji-woo’s hand.
“It makes me happy that you’re saying that to me, Ji-an.”
“...”
Ji-woo said as she stroked my head.
I lifted my head slightly and saw Ji-woo beaming.
That sight was pr… pr…
Ah, damn.
Yeah. She’s pretty. She’s pretty, I tell you.
“Want some more?”
“...Yeah.”
“My, you eat well. Is your mouth really okay?”
Ji-woo said with a smile as she took my plate.
And she skipped off toward the kitchen.
Watching her retreating figure, I let out a small laugh.
...Kang-jeong really is Kang-jeong.
What Kang-jeong said was right. By being a little honest, my heart feels so much lighter.
Well, it’s still only a tiny part.
I can’t take everything out of my heart and be honest about it yet, but…
You have to start with the small things, right?
Just like my first lie was something trivial… maybe I can become more honest later on too.
And, it’s not good to change too suddenly either.
I read it in a book.
They say if a person changes suddenly, they die.
I’m only sixteen, so I don’t want to die yet.
“Here, eat it all.”
“...This is too much.”
“Just eat it all. You said everything I make is delicious.”
“...Alright.”
Whatever.
My honesty training will end here for today.
◇◇◇◆◇◇◇
“...Is that the island of Sardinia?”
“Yeah. Is it your first time here, maknae?”
“Ah, yes. It’s much bigger than I thought.”
“It is. It’s the biggest island around here.”
“Ah…”
My mouth fell slightly open at the sight of the island visible through the small window.
I was a bit worried when I heard we were going to the island for an away game, but Sardinia was such a big island that it felt like an unnecessary worry.
...There’s no way a ball could be kicked so hard it would end up in the sea.
“We will be landing shortly, so please fasten your seatbelts—”
I hadn’t unbuckled my seatbelt in the first place, so I continued to watch the scenery outside the window.
Last week was the cup tournament, and this week is a league match.
Our opponent is a team called Cagliari Calcio.
“Ladies and gentleman, we will be landing…”
Cagliari is a city located on the island of Sardinia, which is detached from the mainland.
Thanks to that, we’re on our way to an away game by plane.
The sight of the huge island, not unlike the mainland, and the sparkling sea reflecting the sunlight are beautiful.
“...”
I captured that sight in a photo.
When I told Ji-woo I was flying to a game again, she was incredibly envious.
She said if she had been born a man, she would have become a soccer player and flown around here and there every week, what a waste.
When I told her there are women’s soccer players too, she told me to be quiet.
Anyway.
Once we land, I’ll send the photo to Ji-woo.
So she can get even more envious.
“Do you have something good going on? Why are you smiling to yourself?”
“...Huh? Ah, it’s nothing.”
I couldn’t help but smile imagining Ji-woo’s cute little tantrum.
*
On the first day we arrived on the island, we trained lightly and rested. Then, on the second day, we headed to the stadium for the match.
“The stadium isn’t that big.”
“Yeah. It’s on the smaller side. It fits about 15,000 people or so?”
As we went out onto the field for our warm-up, the stadium felt very small.
Maybe because it’s right next to the sea, it feels a bit humid too.
“It is small here, but it’s not a great stadium for the away team.”
The captain, who had approached me, said.
“Why?”
“It’s an island. It’s harder for away fans to come, you see? See? There are only home fans. After the game starts, you can expect it to be filled with only home fans.”
Hmm.
Hearing that, it does seem likely.
No matter how small the stadium is, a stadium filled with only home fans won’t be easy.
Plus, the distance between the field and the stands is close, so it must be very intimidating.
“Well, for big games, fans do follow overseas, but Cagliari isn’t a strong enough team for fans to come all the way across the sea to watch. So, what does that mean?”
“?”
“It means we have to win. It means we should be able to easily handle a team like Cagliari and go back. Everyone understands, right?”
In response to the captain’s words, everyone answered energetically and ran out for the warm-up.
I followed behind and started to loosen up lightly as well.
*
In contrast to last week, today’s match lineup was composed of the returning starters.
The defensive line saw the return of the captain and the two Serbian center-back duo.
In the midfield, Torreira-senpai and Bonaventura-senpai returned.
And up front, the real striker, Vlahovic-senpai, stood.
Watching them, you could definitely feel their weight. You could say you could feel the dignity of the starters.
It felt like we wouldn’t lose, no matter what.
Of course, I’m not ignoring the other sunbaes sitting on the bench.
I’m on the bench myself, to begin with.
Today, I was on the bench to start the match.
“Peeeeep—!”
Truthfully, my body felt a bit heavy. Lately.
Thinking about it, I’ve played in every match since my first-team debut.
In numbers, it’s six matches.
Not all of them were full-time, but I played in every weekly match.
Of course, I rested during the A-match period, but still, my body didn’t feel all that light.
The manager has been checking on my condition, so he probably let me rest on the bench today.
Well, or maybe this is just my original spot.
“Good, good—!”
“Let’s push them!”
The game started to flow quite easily.
Cagliari, wearing a red and black uniform, is currently in 18th place in the league, I heard.
Meanwhile, we are in 5th.
Objectively, we have the upper hand.
Plus, everyone looks to be in great condition.
It seems that resting really is good for you. Even I could see how light the sunbaes who didn’t play against Verona were.
The defensive line was solid as a rock.
The midfield, with Torreira-senpai at its center, was firmly in control.
Especially, Vlahovic-senpai’s presence was immense.
As expected, a real striker is different from a fake one.
Cagliari’s defenders were pouring all their attention on Vlahovic-senpai alone.
They had one player on him even when he didn’t have the ball, and two or three would swarm him when he was about to receive it.
But Vlahovic-senpai held his ground even in those situations and kept possession for our side.
Thanks to that, we could play the game easily.
We’d build up easily by sending a long ball from the back for Vlahovic to win.
When attacking, we’d send it to the side first and then aim for the goal simply with a cross.
If I had that kind of overwhelming physique, I wouldn’t have to play soccer so complicatedly.
“Yeeeeeeah—!”
“Nice, nice!”
Anyway, the game went well.
In the 18th minute of the first half, the opening goal came from Vlahovic-senpai’s left foot.
“Wow, that’s brutal! What a shot!”
“Did his jump spin or what!”
In the 37th minute, in a corner kick situation, Milenkovic-senpai scored a fantastic header to make it 2-0.
That’s how the first half ended 2-0.
In the second half that followed, the flow of the game didn’t change much, and in the 11th minute, Vlahovic-senpai’s left foot blazed again.
It was 3-0.
“Hmm…”
By this point, I was thinking it might be time for me to go in soon.
Before the game, the manager had told me that a situation where I would need to play might arise.
But the manager didn’t tell me to warm up. Instead, a few sunbaes left the bench to warm up, and then the substitutions started in a row.
In the 71st minute, Bonaventura-senpai was substituted out.
In the 78th minute, Torreira and Sottil-senpai were substituted out.
In the 82nd minute, the captain and Vlahovic-senpai came off the field as substitutes.
As a result, almost all the starters had been taken off, and the Verona match lineup was left on the field. All except me.
“Good work.”
“Phew. How was I? Was I okay, maknae?”
“Th-of course, you were okay.”
“Haha, really? It feels good to get praised by the maknae.”
The captain, sitting next to me, said as he put on his outerwear.
“We made sure to rest you today by getting everyone off. So, let’s do well in the next game. Got it?”
“Ah, yes…”
I nodded at the captain’s words for now.
The next game.
Our opponent for the next game is Juventus.
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