Looking for My Juliet
"What are you watching?"
A drink heaped with whipped cream suddenly thrust itself into my field of vision. I took a sip of the autumn-season banana caramel cream frappuccino Ju Jun-seo had handed me and let out a small sigh.
Romeo and Juliet? What's this?"
"Our final performance…."
"So you're Juliet? Who's playing Romeo?"
"Romeo's obviously Myeong Je-ha. Juliet hasn't been decided yet."
The freshmen's final performance was less a play than a recreation of a single scene. Purely basic acting practice. There was no proper stage set to speak of—just a somewhat awkward showcase for a batch of newcomers.
"If you don't play Juliet, who will?"
"It has to be decided fairly. Among us."
Still, not a single person wanted to give up the leading role on that stage.
And this time, Do Gyeo-ul is in the class, no less….
Industry insiders would be sure to show up just to watch Do Gyeo-ul perform. It was as good as a debut opportunity.
"So what's the problem? Why that expression on your face?"
Was it that old chronic trauma of mine? Or was it that the play I'd turned to, out of habit, whenever the misery of being an unknown actress got to me, had somehow changed?
The truth was, I didn't know anything for certain right now.
That goes for why I'm like this in the first place, too.
Everything just felt like sinking into a swamp. And the most important thing was this:
"I don't know what my Juliet is…."
I'd memorized the script long ago—worn the ending pages nearly to shreds.
And yet nothing was coming to me.
How was I supposed to become Juliet? Not even the faintest thread to pull on.
"…"
Why was it that I, who had just been playing Pi Chae-won so effortlessly with her face on, was this lost when it came to Juliet?
I had no choice but to admit the reason I'd been trying so hard to ignore.
It's probably because the character I have to interpret is a character who has to beat Do Gyeo-ul….
It felt like being thrown back to before my regression. A tiny, tiny extra—nameless actress Han Yeo-reum.
And across from me stood Do Gyeo-ul, who took home every prestigious film festival award from the Baekryong Film Awards on down, plus trophies from all three major broadcasting awards… a woman whose life was a trophy case in itself, someone whose name alone told everyone what she did for a living.
Why is your name Romeo?
Staring at the script, I had the strange illusion that the word Do Gyeo-ul was flickering over Romeo's name.
Why is your name Do Gyeo-ul?
Just when I'd decided there was no getting over the wall that was her name, Ju Jun-seo tossed out a careless remark.
"Why don't you just say one line on stage? That's all."
"…Say what?"
"Just go 'Ah.' One single line is all you need. Anyone who hears your voice… they'll just… you'll be able to take the Juliet role, no question."
It wasn't exactly helpful advice, but it was a comfort.
One thing that was different from before my regression: at the very least, I knew I wasn't alone anymore.
"Standby, please—!"
A staffer shouted from far off. It was time to become Pi Chae-won again.
And so, without ever finding my Juliet, the audition date drew closer.
Myeong Je-ha pressed the door lock of Dokgo Min's studio with practiced ease. The heating was off, and just as he'd expected, Han Yeo-reum was inside the chilly room.
Beside her lay her phone, dead as if its battery had drained completely.
"So that's why you weren't answering."
Han Yeo-reum didn't answer. Instead, she stared at the projector screen without so much as blinking.
The movie playing was, of course, Romeo and Juliet. He sat down on the sofa beside her.
"You know it gets decided tomorrow, right?"
"…Yeah. I know…."
Tomorrow was finally the audition for Team B's Romeo and Juliet. Not a single member of the group had offered to give up the role of Juliet.
Which meant she had to compete against everyone.
Yeo-reum, who'd claimed the Romeo role simply by existing, jabbed him in the cheek, poke poke.
"Old-timer, just leave already…."
Holding the script in both hands, Yeo-reum gazed at the screen with hollow eyes. It happened to be the love confession scene—the most famous scene in all of Romeo and Juliet.
—Why are you Romeo?
Han Yeo-reum desperately tried to take in the scene. She still seemed unable to get her bearings.
He pulled back the hand she'd been poking his cheek with and took the script from her grip.
"Is it that you haven't memorized your lines yet, or is there another reason?"
"I've memorized them all. I never forgot them in the first place. I've never once dropped a line."
"Then why are you sitting here like this?"
"…I don't know."
When Yeo-reum answered haltingly, he offered a simple reply.
"Then find it."
An irritation-laced voice shot right back.
"You think it's that easy? I'm anxious because I don't know if I can even play Juliet. Unlike you or Do Gyeo-ul, I never had a role that was set for me from the start."
She was a strange one. She always seemed brimming with confidence—overflowing with self-love, even—and yet the moment something important arrived, she crumbled like this. It probably came from all those years spent as a nobody.
There's no one on Team B who could beat Han Yeo-reum and take Juliet anyway.
Myeong Je-ha reached his conclusion coolly. There was no way Han Yeo-reum wouldn't be the lead.
No—she had to be.
Han Yeo-reum sighed again and turned her gaze back to the film.
Her head's in a bad place.
The current Yeo-reum looked like she was barely holding on to her composure. And naturally, Myeong Je-ha knew exactly how to manage a broken-down mindset for maximum efficiency.
"Do you know why Romeo and Juliet is so famous?"
"Because it's a tragedy."
"Then why do you think it's a tragedy?"
Of course, if this were the kind of question that never yielded an answer, her fragile mental state would shatter into powder…. But unlike his own problems, Yeo-reum's were the kind that had answers. Which made this easy.
"Because the families hate each other. The Capulets and the Montagues. They fell in love knowing full well that the family, the parents, the relatives would all oppose it. That's the tragedy, isn't it?"
"Hmm. That's not all of it, though. Think a little deeper. Why would the families have fallen out in the first place? Political reasons? A fight over honor? Ideological conflict driven by politics? Religious strife?"
He could feel the focus gradually returning to her glazed-over eyes. Myeong Je-ha watched her steadily.
Just get her to the core of it.
Han Yeo-reum had acted for a very long time—steadily, tirelessly.
It was easy to guess. You could tell from the voice alone that delivered a single line of dialogue. Which meant she would never have been lazy about script analysis, either.
At last, her listless mouth opened.
"…What if the families split because the person they back for king is different? Wouldn't that be interesting? The Montagues, who sided with the true king, keep their noble status—while the Capulets, who backed the fallen crown prince, go down with him. A wealthy Romeo and a poor Juliet—the class gap would be visible in their clothes alone. It gives you a clear point of distinction from other Juliets, and…."
Strength steadily gathered in her voice. Han Yeo-reum swallowed, a dry gulp.
"What do you think?"
"About what?"
"…You're the Romeo. This Juliet I just described—what do you think? Is it okay?"
Her eyes were brimming with determination, but her voice trembled at the edges. Myeong Je-ha answered briefly.
"Anything."
It was an answer packed with meaning. But it seemed to be enough, because Yeo-reum smiled.
"Do you know anywhere I can borrow hanbok? I mean, a hanbok that would look good to anyone who saw it."
Out of habit he almost answered maybe, but he changed his mind and gave her a nod instead. A smile bloomed across Yeo-reum's face.
"That's it. I think I can do it. Juliet."
A conviction-filled attitude. It was exactly the face Myeong Je-ha had been hoping to see.
Thirty days remained until the final performance.