Chapter 87
Chapter 87
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Translator: penny
Chapter: 87
Chapter Title: Responder I
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Shin Noah
1
No Do-ha sneered at me, calling me an old monster who'd lived over a thousand years, but that assessment was way, way off base.
No Do-ha is originally the sort of person who looks at pretty autumn raindrops falling from the sky and describes them as, “Ooh, the H₂O molecules are committing mass suicide” (actual quote). I'm saying, she's a sharp-tongued critic whose venom goes straight down to her crooked spine.
How could I possibly get hung up on every snide remark from such a human scum?
Terms like "geezer" or "old freak" are utterly unsuitable for describing me, the Undertaker. No need to even mention curses overflowing with hatred and contempt for humanity, like "boomer," "fossil," or "lolicon."
Something far more neutral, like "senior" or "teacher," would be much more fitting.
A senior literally means someone walking ahead.
As a regressor, I, the Undertaker, am always one step ahead of everyone else—not because I'm nitpicking hierarchy, but literally the senior of all humanity. Why? Am I wrong?
The same goes for teacher.
Sure, plenty of people are biologically older than me. But if we talk mental age? Who in the world is more mature than me? As No Do-ha herself said, I've lived well over a thousand years. So I'm everyone's teacher. What do you think? Am I wrong?
“What the hell are you babbling about, you fossil bastard...?”
“……”
But in reality, hardly anyone called me "senior" or "teacher."
No, if it were just rare, that'd be fine... but there were more old folks calling No Do-ha "Teacher No Do-ha" consistently!
Oh, what a tragedy.
How could one not sigh at this? That human scum being called teacher. Even in this land once called the Land of Propriety and Courtesy of the East, the Three Bonds are torn and the Five Constants shattered.
But just as heroes appear in chaotic times, sages emerge in turbulent eras.
"Ah, Senior Doctor!"
The necromancer of the Korean Peninsula, yet instead of black clothes, she stubbornly sticks to a pristine white sailor uniform like a true member of the white-clad nation. A patriot.
The almost only person who calls me "senior," also the 113th student council president of Baekhwa Girls' High School, and the guild master of the Baekhwa Guild.
“Seniooorr!”
Sometimes, walking down the hallway of the National Highway Management Corps headquarters, I'd hear her calling me, and I couldn't help but turn around. Every time, the voice's owner would come running with footsteps that sounded like pure vitality—tatatata—then beam brightly.
A sight to behold.
If I didn't know that in the regression where zombies flooded the peninsula, the one where the 'Academy City' was built, and even the one that finally led to the world's end, she wore exactly the same smile...
A somehow fixed smile. A preserved expression.
“Undertaker senior, where are you going—?”
“……”
This is an episode about names. A story about how long it took for the title "senior" to evolve into "teacher."
The apostle of the outer god Mugen.
Let's talk about Cheon Yo-hwa.
2
If I had to name the top two people on the Korean Peninsula I least wanted to get involved with, first place would obviously be the Sword Marquis, the old head of the Mount Hua Sect, and second place was Cheon Yo-hwa.
Go Yo-ri? Let's set her aside for now until we define whether she's even 'human.'
If it weren't for the information I got from the Fairy Lord in the 89th regression, I never would've approached Cheon Yo-hwa on purpose.
-Tutorial Dungeon: Baekhwa Girls' High School.
-Among its survivors, Cheon Yo-hwa is the chosen apostle of the entity 'Fairy Lord.'
I felt like Sherlock Holmes hearing the name James Moriarty for the first time.
Or like Zhang Liao unwittingly witnessing Cao Cao's taste for married women. 'Ah, my whole life up to now has been for the sole purpose of catching and grilling that bastard,' that sudden epiphany of one's existence.
Mugen even outclassed Moriarty in villainous dignity—by a notch, no, two or three.
Unlike the old geezer whose identity as Magunim was immediately exposed by Sherlock Holmes' awakening skill, Interest Method, Mugen never once revealed himself all the way to the 89th regression. I didn't even know his name at first, so I gave him the moniker Mugen myself.
Cheon Yo-hwa was the sole suspect linking to that black幕 among black幕s, the villain among villains.
My inner detective couldn't help glaring daggers.
And naturally, my detective prowess far surpassed that of some English drug-addicted hedonist. That guy couldn't even turn back time.
"Your hair color gives you away—you must be Cheon Yo-hwa. I've heard a lot about you from the kids."
"Uh......"
109th regression. As I mentioned before, as soon as half a year passed after the 'Baekhwa Girls' High Tutorial Dungeon' unlocked, I dove right in and confronted Cheon Yo-hwa.
"I heard through our alumni network that an incredibly smart and quick-witted junior got elected student council president. By the way, I was in student council too, and now I'm the alumni association chair."
“……”
Cheon Yo-hwa, conquered!
Thanks to this necromancer, things like the 'AI Judge' got developed and spread across the peninsula, among other benefits... but one tiny problem cropped up.
No, actually, it wasn't tiny at all. It was pretty serious.
"Yo-hwa."
"Yes, Senior Doctor!"
"By any chance, are you close with the fairies?"
"Pardon?"
"You know, the tutorial fairies. Or maybe through them, you've connected with some greater being. If you've had any such experience, let me know."
“……”
Blink. Cheon Yo-hwa blinked rapidly.
"Fairies, senior?"
"Yeah?"
"Um. Is that some kind of code? Or...... a novel? Come on, senior. Fairies don't exist in the real world. You joke too much—."
“…No, what are you talking about? A tutorial dungeon happened at Baekhwa Girls' High. Of course there were tutorial fairies. You all cleared it after a whopping 11 months with zero contact to the outside......”
"11 months? Hmm...... Ahaha. Sorry, senior. I have no idea what you're talking about. Gasp. Senior, you haven't...... gotten involved with some cult or anything, have you?"
“……”
"Oh my god! No way! My family deals with cults all the time, so I know—they're bad news, no matter what!"
Advanced physiognomy couldn't be distinguished from the Interest Method.
To my eyes, honed by over a thousand years studying faces, Cheon Yo-hwa didn't seem to be lying.
My scholarly achievement hit the mark.
“Kyaa! A goblin appeared!”
“......? Senior, why do people call wolves goblins?”
"The Ten Tribes are invading! Fight back!"
“Uwaaaah! E-earthquake! Senior, earthquake! Get down quick—!”
“……”
Cheon Yo-hwa couldn't perceive anomalies as anomalies.
Goblins looked like 'wolves' to her, and the rampaging Ten Tribes felt like a 'major earthquake.'
The same went for other anomalies. Once, I even captured a fairy alive and shoved it in her face.
“Waaah! A kitty! So cute!”
She hugged the fairy and rubbed her cheek against it. Even when the fairy spoke—“Eek!” “Let go!”—it only registered as a cat's growl to Cheon Yo-hwa.
It was broken.
Her brain. Her perception system.
As if the part recognizing anomalies had been surgically removed from her head.
“...I see. That's why asking about fairies or Mugen yields nothing useful.”
“......? What did you just say, senior?”
"Nothing."
Watching Cheon Yo-hwa suffer selective hearing loss like a washed-up light novel protagonist, I furrowed my brows.
Perhaps even this 'perception contamination' was Mugen's manipulation.
A true black幕—unlike the attention-seekers in fiction who pose as villains while screaming 'Notice me!' to everyone, deserving awe.
I investigated Cheon Yo-hwa as thoroughly as possible.
Her main family home was in Sejong City, a prominent local powerhouse, and I even learned their mansion was enormous.
Magnificent tiled-roof houses.
The grounds spanned 14,990 square meters, nestled at the foot of Marshal Mountain overlooking the Korean government offices.
The surface retained traditional Joseon-era hanok style, but the underground—off-limits to outsiders—hid modern architecture.
Still, no real gains. There were some documents in the mansion, but no survivors or witnesses.
At best, her father had served as a director at Baekhwa Girls' High?
By inference, the school itself seemed built with this family's sponsorship.
Thus, Cheon Yo-hwa wasn't just a student or student council president—she was equivalent to the 'young miss' of a private school foundation.
Otherwise, the oddity was piles of Laozi's Tao Te Ching and other Taoist texts found in the underground facilities.
Even with all this info and context, I was still lost in the fog.
"One last question, Yo-hwa. I looked into your family a bit. Your father's surname is Cheon (千). But yours is Heavenly Cheon (天). Do you know how it changed?"
"Huh? No? First time hearing that...... I don't remember my family at all anyway. And investigating my lineage? That's a bit creepy, senior......"
...Strategy revision necessary.
Contacting Cheon Yo-hwa 'after' she broke out of the Tutorial Dungeon yielded nothing. Too much information lost.
I needed the Cheon Yo-hwa from before—still wandering in the dungeon called Baekhwa Girls' High.
A feat impossible without turning back time.
"Got it, Yo-hwa. See you next time."
"Huh? Yes, senior! See you!"
And fortunately, I could perform such acrobatics.
3
As I, the first in humanity to uncover it, revealed: the 'Tutorial Dungeon' was none other than an artificial Void created by Mugen—a human laboratory.
Like other labs, the Tutorial Dungeon strictly controlled outsider access to prevent virus intrusions, computer thefts, data losses—nightmares that spike grad students' blood pressure just hearing the words.
Thus, it stayed sealed until cleared.
Even the Saintess' 'Clairvoyance' couldn't peer into this closed space. Forcing the lab door open as an outsider human? Impossible.
Yeah. A 'human.'
"Let's go, Fairy No. 264."
"Whoaaa! Loyalty! Obeying Leader Comrade's orders...!"
Even labs dead serious about physical viruses handle mental ones differently.
Fairy No. 264, infected by humanity's strongest virus, charged energetically toward Baekhwa Girls' High School.
Screeech—
The school gate, impassable to any human, couldn't halt our march. Like the 1832 Paris barricades, it recognized revolutionary comrades and opened smoothly.
(Alert) Seo■ Univ 2 Admits! (Congrats)
A faded banner fluttered. For the record, I firmly oppose academic elitism and credentialism, so whenever I see it, I keep possibilities open: Seoul National, Sogang, or Seokyeong University?
Had fierce battles already raged? Not just the banner—the gate was damaged everywhere.
The signboard that should bear the elegant hanja school name was partially destroyed: not Baekhwa Girls' High School (白花女子高等學校), but only '■■女子高等學校.'
"Comrade! The vanguard has carved a blood path!"
"Hm. Advance."
The flower beds around the school buildings bloomed with red spider lilies, aka himawari flowers, in wild profusion. Beyond the hill of himawari lay a forest of pale white birches.
The fairy cried out toward it.
"Full speed ahead! Perish under bourgeois oppression! Offering our lives for Leader Comrade Undertaker!"
The moment we entered the grounds.
“Eeeeek?”
Poof!
Detecting intruders, a frantic guard burst out from inside.
Of course, the real guard lay slumped dead near the gate; this was just the 'Baekhwa Girls' High Tutorial Dungeon' fairy's new armband.
The enemy fairy looked us over and panicked, eyes bulging.
"F-fairy? Human? Eek? Why a human?"
"Hoeek! Distinguishing human and fairy by race! People are divided solely by ideology...! That's definitely a bourgeois lackey!"
“Eek? Eek? Eek?”
The enemy fairy fell into chaos.
"I-I'm Fairy No. 16, in charge of this tutorial! Bringing a human without prior agreement is super suspicious...! State your rank and name!"
"I'm No. 264! Heaven itself bestowed the revolutionary number! The vile bourgeois frontman, offer your neck to the guillotine!"
“Eeeeek! Rebellion! Rebellion! Guards! Guuuards!”
The moment No. 16 drew her wand to kill us, our No. 264 gripped hers too.
"Where do you think—."
“Eek!”
Boom!
The fairies exploded simultaneously. Zero margin for error in the blast.
A tragic backstory here. All fairies spawn with exactly identical combat power.
When fairy fights fairy, it always ends in mutual destruction—fit not for modern fantasy protagonists, but top-tier 'stylishly dead side characters,' or in Romance of the Three Kingdoms, oath-brothers who'd keep Peach Garden vows.
'Good. Now Mugen's surveillance eyes on Baekhwa Girls' High are temporarily blind.'
Now speed was life.
First, I stripped the guard corpse's uniform and stuffed it in my trunk leather bag. Then entered the school building.
I'd memorized the layout from prior regressions, but true to Void nature, terrain twisted in real time.
-Rooooar......
-H-hee, hee, hee, hee.
See? Just stepping in the entrance, and eerie sounds don't-welcome visitors.
This was no longer Baekhwa Girls' High School.
'School Ghost Stories.'
Toilet ghosts, seven mysteries—every anomaly tied to 'school' manifested in this demonic realm.
750 people trapped in the Void 'School Ghost Stories.' All Baekhwa students.
After 11 months of struggle, final survivors: just 19.
Two even jump off the roof soon after. In 'School Ghost Stories,' rooftop suicides count as ghost murders, so they're victims too.
Survival rate: 2.26%.
The Korean Peninsula's worst Tutorial Dungeon.
But... no matter how strong the anomalies or Void, the stronger they are, the more exploitable weaknesses emerge.
I call them the anomalies' or Void's vital points—aka blind spots.
Knowing or not these blind spots drastically alters Void difficulty.
Bacon's old maxim 'Knowledge is power' rings even truer in the end times.
So, a question.
For an outsider intruder—an older man compared to Baekhwa students—what's the best blind spot in 'School Ghost Stories' to exploit?
What disguise lets you rival the rotting 'ghosts' swarming everywhere, wandering nonstop without seeming 'odd' to impose on this Void?
“…Good. Found it.”
The answer lay in the document I now held.
[Baekhwa Girls' High School Guard Shift Roster]
Scribble. With the pen I'd brought from outside, I wrote my name in the last slot.
Then quickly changed into the gate guard uniform. Cap on head. Name tag on chest: 'Guard Undertaker.'
Change complete.
“…Ahh, this cool, heavy sensation. It's been a while.”
Finally, left hand gripped the guard's must-have: the 'flashlight.' My reflection in the duty room mirror? Perfect.
This Undertaker hereby takes the job of school guard this regression.
The moment the strongest profession in 'School Ghost Stories' descended.