Chapter 191
Chapter 191
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Translator: penny
Chapter: 191
Chapter Title: The Patriot
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Infinite Regressor, But I'm Spilling the Tea Chapter 191 (191/485)
6
Jo Young-soo's National March!
From Busan to Pyongyang!
I'll show it to you hot and heavy!
…No such ad actually popped up, but at least to me, the shock was on that level.
By conducting surveys not just among the awakened but among ordinary people without exception, he planned to collect the 'public opinion of the entire Korean Peninsula.' How bold an ambition was that?
And Jo Young-soo's ambitious project.
[Jo Young-soo died in Yecheon.]
He didn't even make it out of Gyeongsangbuk-do, let alone reach Pyongyang, and ended up stranded.
Hearing the Saintess's report, I sighed.
"In a way, he did show us a hot ending…"
[Yes?]
"Nothing. Just talking to myself. So, what was the cause of death?"
[Oh. He got lost in the Void and starved to death. You know how sometimes when you're walking near the Nakdong River, you end up entering the Hwangsan River Void.]
The Hwangsan River (黃山江) was the old Silla-era name for the Nakdong River.
And the anomalies interpreted this Hwangsan as Hwangsan (黃酸), that is, H₂SO₄—a strong acidic substance. The entire river had become a biochemical terror weapon.
Just a single misstep of the foot would literally send you straight to the Yellow Springs, so caution was needed.
[He wandered there for three days, made a raft, and tried to cross, but it melted after just a few meters. Jo Young-soo himself too.]
"Is that for real…?"
Anyway, Jo Young-soo was dead. In crude terms, a dog's death.
And the citizens who heard the news of his passing weren't particularly shocked. Quite the opposite, in fact.
"Did you hear? That crazy old man died. The one who was always protesting at Babel Tower Square."
"Huh? How'd he die?"
"Heard he went off alone to travel the whole country for some survey."
"Oh. Guess he didn't have much attachment to life."
The citizens offered a moment of condolence and then promptly returned to their daily grind.
In short, Jo Young-soo's death didn't become much of a news story.
Considering he'd spent his whole life in Busan making news, it was a bit ironic.
Why Jo Young-soo had suddenly become obsessed with a nationwide public opinion survey, what his goal was—it was now lost to eternity.
"Hmm."
If there were no regressors in this world.
"It's bothering me a little."
[Yes?]
"Didn't you have a lot of interest in Jo Young-soo, Saintess? Yet you just watched him wander in the Void for three days?"
[Public and private have to be separated.]
The Saintess answered calmly.
[I do have personal interest in Jo Young-soo's activities, but I can't go borrowing constellation powers to help him.]
"Really? You didn't subtly nudge me into taking an interest in him?"
[…]
"If so, then it worked. Saintess. Now even I'm curious about that big old idiot."
What was the goal Jo Young-soo had staked his life on?
I was a little curious.
And I was the kind of guy who, once curiosity struck, became a voluntary slave to dopamine, just like that elf wizard who sticks her head into mimic chests.
And so, in the next cycle.
I immediately changed my approach to Jo Young-soo.
"Teacher. Let me seat you here before I go."
"Ugh… ugh…"
First, the 'all-night drinking party' event at Haeundae pocha proceeded the same.
The 91st public opinion survey—that is, asking anew about the fall of the Republic of Korea—happened exactly the same.
The branching point of the Jo Young-soo route came right after.
"Teacher Jo!"
"Huh? Teacher Jang, isn't it!"
The day he was leaving Busan for Changwon. This time, I personally came to see him off.
"What brings Teacher Jang here?"
"There's a caravan heading to Changwon today. I have business in Mokpo too, so I'm tagging along with the caravan."
"Really!"
Jo Young-soo's eyes widened.
"Teacher Jang! Just one favor, please!"
"A favor?"
"Yes! No matter what, I have to go to Changwon and continue the survey, but these National Highway Management Corps caravan guys are dead set against it! An organization run on taxpayers' money being this stingy!"
Of course it was. Why would a busy caravan hauling supplies add an extra baggage?
In the previous cycle, he probably caused a huge scene and forced his way onto the caravan.
"Is that so?"
But this time, there was the Undertaker—called 'Your Excellency' by the ultimate psychopath Yoo Ji-won herself—a once-in-a-generation networking genius.
"Hey, you caravan folks. While Jo Young-soo here and I were drinking separately, can't you let him slide just this once?"
"O-Of course!"
"If he's a friend of Your Excellency the Undertaker, we should treat him like VIP! Sorry for the rudeness!"
"Good, thanks. Next time I see your faces, I'll brew you some complimentary coffee. Oh. But I'm worried the other caravan members might not know about our relationship…"
"No worries, Your Excellency!"
"We'll post it on SG Net so every caravan member knows!"
I glanced back subtly. Jo Young-soo stood there with his mouth agape.
—See that? That's the 'power of the protagonist.'
It shows up every day in other novels, but in my tale, it's like an oasis in the desert, a rare sip.
Jo Young-soo unwittingly scored a free ticket for a Korean Peninsula tour, but my power didn't stop there.
"To survey without missing a spot, you'll need to visit remote areas the caravan doesn't reach. Use this then."
"Uh, Teacher Jang, this is…?"
"A yogurt cart."
Korea's famous landmark. The third-generation refrigerated electric cart, Coco (Cold&Cold).
Limited to 'Republic of Korea territory,' it could go anywhere and appear anywhere. Jo Young-soo was now no different from Guan Yu with his Red Hare.
"Th-Thank you. Teacher Jang. I wonder if I can ever repay this kindness before I die…"
The down-and-out streamer was dumbfounded by the sudden big donor's contribution.
I smiled faintly.
"I've always been interested in your survey, Teacher Jo. Don't think of it as a personal gift—consider it support for your cause."
"Teacher Jang…!"
Affinity maxed out.
On the way parting from Jo Young-soo in Changwon, the Saintess said.
[Unexpected. I thought you had no interest in Korea or surveys, Undertaker.]
"I didn't originally. But someone kept subtly asking me to check him out."
[…? Was there someone like that around you, Undertaker? Clairvoyance didn't catch it.]
"I have privacy too. Anyway, you keep an eye on him too, Saintess. Help if he gets lost in the Void or something."
[Ah, yes. Got it.]
Naturally, word spread through the regressor alliance network: 'The Undertaker's interested in that crazy old guy at Babel Tower Square.'
Sim A-ryeon, the Saintess reigning in Pyongyang as the Northern Saintess, one day poked her head out from the Inunaki Tunnel.
"Y-Yeah. Monster of camaraderie…"
"…?"
"Pretending not to, but G-Guild Leader. You wanted to join the top-tier named ranks on SG Net, right? That's why you're always hanging off me and the big idiot for networking…"
"…?"
"I-I'll play along during quiet dawn shifts when no one's around. So don't comment morning, noon, evening, or night. Invading community camaraderie with real-life connections… I-I won't forgive such absurd tyranny…"
"…?"
She said her piece and scurried off.
What the hell? Sometimes her mental world scared me.
Anyway, despite appearances (regrettably), she was the Northern Saintess.
Sim A-ryeon granted Jo Young-soo the status of a Dongbang Singuguo capital monk. Now he could roam North Korean territory freely.
Essentially, most of the powerhouses dominating the Korean Peninsula from front and back were sponsoring Jo Young-soo personally.
Thanks to the light novel trope of 'Why are heroes and saintesses obsessed with me, a mere down-and-out streamer?!', Jo Young-soo turned the whole country upside down.
Time passed.
Day 2,211.
From Busan to Sinuiju.
South to north.
The time it took for every surviving person on the Korean Peninsula to complete a single public opinion survey.
7
[Finished the last survey in Sinuiju and heading back. Now.]
"Heading back to Busan?"
[Probably.]
Survey period: about 6 years.
During that time, I didn't ask the Saintess about the results.
My interest was solely in Jo Young-soo as an individual. What people thought about the fall of the Republic of Korea? Zero interest.
What exactly had Jo Young-soo been trying to achieve through his 6-year journey?
Confirmation that the homeland still lived in people's hearts? Motivation to continue the Republic of Korea revival movement?
[Oh. Destination seems different. Jo Young-soo's secured a ship from Pyongyang, but not to Busan.]
Neither was correct.
[He's coming to Seoul.]
Seoul was practically my backyard.
I rushed to the pier, pretending nonchalance, and cast my fishing line. Jo Young-soo, disembarking from the Pyongyang ship, had no choice but to spot me.
He shouted in surprise.
"Teacher Jang! What are you doing here!"
"Oh, Teacher Jo?"
Jo Young-soo abandoned his yogurt cart and ran to hug me tightly.
Reunion after 6 years. He smelled of thick grass and dry sunlight.
"Good heavens! Teacher Jang, how do you look exactly the same after all these years!"
"Haha. Your voice is still booming as ever, Teacher."
"A man of the Republic must have spirit, spirit! What are you doing here anyway!"
"Enjoying some fishing. My Seoul hideout's nearby."
"Whoa! Fishing in times like these…"
Admiration and affinity deepened in Jo Young-soo's eyes as he looked at me.
He'd aged far more than before. To some, he might look late 80s.
He'd traveled the country on a frail non-awakened body. Even with generous donations, it couldn't have been easy.
"And what brings you to the Han River, Teacher Jo?"
"Ah! Thanks to your support, Teacher Jang, I finally finished the survey!"
Thud thud. Jo Young-soo patted the cart.
Instead of yogurt, it was piled high with waste paper.
"Now I'll take this guy to his final resting place!"
"Final resting place…?"
"Yes! Where all the bastards who turned the country into this mess are gathered!"
Jo Young-soo pointed ahead.
That direction was Yeouido, and on Yeouido stood a dome building no Republic of Korea native could forget.
The National Assembly Building.
"Uh…"
I quickly patched my stunned silence.
"Teacher Jo. It may look like the National Assembly on the outside, but it's actually a Void. When the White Night Void hit Seoul, it got wiped like other buildings into ruins, then one day it just reappeared on its own. There's even a real robot underground beneath that dome."
"Huh? I don't know about that stuff! Anyway, I have to go there!"
Thinking about it, this guy in the last cycle went on a solo nationwide trip bare-handed and ended up free-diving in the Hwangsan River.
A sensible warning like 'it's a Void, dangerous' wouldn't get through.
I'd basically performed forced CPR to revive someone who was supposed to die.
"Then I'll go with you."
"Oh dear! I'm so sorry to trouble you…"
"It's fine, really. I was just killing time fishing anyway."
"Whew! From one to ten, thank you so much, Teacher! To end up indebted to you at the beginning and the end like this!"
From the pier to the National Assembly wasn't far. Even at the cart's slow pace, maybe 30 minutes.
During those 30 minutes, we chatted idly. Which town had it toughest in the surveys. Any near-death experiences…
The talk gradually delved into the past.
In the days when civilization was intact, he'd been an editor at a small local media outlet.
"My clan is Pungyang Jo!"
The timeline jumped straight to Jo Young-soo's childhood.
"As you know, Teacher Jang, our ancestors back then with their seodozhengchi and all really ruined Joseon! Though some historians argue it wasn't entirely that way!"
I nodded.
Pungyang Jo was famous. Along with Andong Kim, they were the top two 'clans that make history class unbearable.'
Mere mortals compared to Yeheung Min, but anyway, Jo Young-soo continued.
"Man! When I read the textbooks as a kid, it shocked me big time!"
"I see."
"Yes! So in my young heart, I vowed. How can they be called the culprits who ruined the country! Why is my family the clan of national ruin!"
Jo Young-soo clenched his fist in the air.
"Just you wait! When I grow up, unlike my ancestors, I'll be a loyal scholar like Choi Ik-hyeon, properly serving the country! The elders said nothing, but this thunderbolt kid made a fuss alone."
Heh heh heh. Laughter burst from Jo Young-soo's aged lips.
"So really, the root of my feelings for the country is childhood shame and inferiority. Not something to boast about proudly to others."
8
Entering the Yeouido National Assembly, as expected, anomalies swarmed.
No major boss-level ones, but village-tier anomalies aplenty.
If I hadn't accompanied him, Jo Young-soo's life would've ended here.
'Just how many dog deaths does this guy dodge?'
Bitterly amused inwardly, I somehow escorted him safely to the main National Assembly building.
"Ah!"
Jo Young-soo looked around.
"Same as before! Well, back then half the seats were filled with assemblymen."
"Hmm."
"Country's all ruined, but this place is intact. Heh heh! Probably no different from back then."
I didn't chime in. It wasn't directed at me—more like soliloquy.
Jo Young-soo strolled the main chamber with hands behind his back.
Peering at assemblyman nameplates on desks, muttering "Ah!" "Right, there was this guy!"
A place where no one remained.
Once, the aspirations, cheers, longings, hopes, contempt, anger, mockery, and enmity of the Korean Peninsula's people had condensed here.
Thud. Thud.
Jo Young-soo placed one sheet of paper on each desk.
I enhanced my vision and glanced at the content.
[Republic of Korea 91st Public Opinion Survey]
[Question: Do you think the
Republic of Korea
nation has
fallen?]
[Yes - 99.99%]
[No – 0.01%]
After distributing the tattered papers to all seats, Jo Young-soo walked to the speaker's chair.
His gaze fixed somewhere in the void, as if looking not at the present but the past.
"Please take your seats."
Jo Young-soo's voice echoed softly. No mic, so no authority in the tone.
Just the voice of an ordinary man whose face had aged to late 80s from crisscrossing the country.
"Quorum achieved. I hereby open the session."
Thud, thud, thud.
The wooden gavel struck air three times. Amid it, Jo Young-soo coughed.
"With the Speaker absent, I, Jo Young-soo, will reluctantly chair the session. Currently, 33 people across the nation consider themselves Republic of Korea citizens, and I have been delegated authority by all to conduct this assembly."
"……"
"Honorable assembly members. And citizens. As interim Speaker proxy, before tabling the agenda, I will give a progress report."
Rustle.
Jo Young-soo flipped the survey sheet.
"First, Busan. To the question 'Has the Republic of Korea fallen?', about 86% of eligible voters responded. Of 235,695 respondents, 235,693 chose 1: 'It has fallen.'"
Paper turned.
"Next, Changwon. To the question 'Has the Republic of Korea fallen?', about 91% responded. All 54,980 respondents chose 1: 'It has fallen.'"
Sheets turned one by one.
With each rustle of waste paper, the named cities crept from south to north.
"Finally, Sinuiju. To the question 'Has the Republic of Korea fallen?', about 89% responded. All 21,139 respondents chose 1: 'It has fallen.'"
Announcing 6 years of survey results took less than 6 minutes.
Jo Young-soo closed the final sheet.
"The survey targeted citizens aged 5 and above. Considering the issue's gravity, not just those 18+, but 5+ were deemed eligible voters. As it concerned the nation's future."
Cough. Jo Young-soo's coughs grew frequent. He paused each time, then continued deliberately.
"A survey is just a survey. But in the current situation with no elections, this interim chair views it as proxy voting. To support this, I have been delegated rights from the 33 citizens who chose 2: 'Has not fallen.'"
Cough.
"Thus, the interim chair tables the agenda on the Republic of Korea's existence. Related vote results already announced, so we proceed to resolution. Objections?"
Cough.
"All voted? Voting closed. Results: About 88% voter turnout. 1: 'Fallen' at 3,125,678 votes, over 99.99%. 2: 'Not fallen' at 33 votes, under 0.01%."
Cough.
"Thus, the Republic of Korea is hereby declared fallen."
Thud, thud, thud.
Gavel sound.
Then, something bizarre happened.
From the clearly empty assembly seats, applause erupted regardless of party lines.
Applause came from the vacant gallery too. Amid claps, camera flash noises mixed in.
Clap clap clap clap clap clap clap!
Stranger still: Jo Young-soo showed no reaction, as if only I could hear it.
Jo Young-soo simply sat quietly in the speaker's chair, eyes closed.
"……"
Watching his serene face, a thought struck.
Just as individuals need funerals upon death, perhaps nations do too.
This old man, whom I overlooked, had shouldered the funeral rites alone with 6 years of mourning.
Thus, the nation called Republic of Korea had died and been placed in the casket at this very moment.
9
After that day, Jo Young-soo never again protested at Babel Tower Square with 'Dictator No Do-ha, step down!'
He lived as an ordinary old man, shuttling between free meal spots and day labor sites, and soon died.
Already frail with age, plus exhausting all his life's energy on the nationwide trek.
No relatives, so I took charge as chief mourner. Set up a modest funeral hall in his shack.
Few visitors. Just old men who'd pass time playing baduk with him.
Then, on the final night, No Do-ha showed up alone, without attendants.
She glanced around the ramshackle shack, little more than a tent.
"No yukgaejang here…?"
"How could I afford that pricey stuff."
"Aren't you filthy rich…?"
"Hey now. It's not about money—it's heartfelt rites. A lavish funeral now would draw every Tom, Dick, and Harry, against the deceased's wishes, right?"
"Hmm…"
That was our opening chat upon her arrival.
No Do-ha bowed to the portrait (skipping me, the chief mourner) and plopped down beside me.
"Why'd that old coot go from noisy protests every day to suddenly shutting himself away…?"
"After finishing the survey, he went to the Yeouido National Assembly and declared the Republic of Korea fallen."
"Hm? Oh? Ohhh…"
No Do-ha rubbed her chin.
"What about the body…?"
"Last representative of a fallen nation. Anomalies wouldn't eye it otherwise. Planning to cremate and scatter at sea."
And so it was.
Anomalies were as dangerous to the dead as the living. Without proper procedure, high risk of violating 'funeral etiquette: don't suddenly revive and scare mourners!'
Current trend: scatter ashes at sea, erect simple marker. Called ha-myo (sea tomb).
"For the world's Undertaker to oversee the funeral from start to finish. Talk about a lucky funeral…"
No Do-ha, tagging along to the end, snarked.
The long stone of the sea tomb was engraved thus:
Jo Young-soo
趙泳洙
Citizen of the Republic of Korea
大韓民國 國民
No Do-ha shrugged.
"Stayed up all night since yesterday—I'm starving…"
"Yukgaejang?"
"Oh. Yukgaejang sounds good…"
No epilogue.
In a sense, this entire episode was the epilogue for the country called Korea.
-Patriot. End.