Chapter 169
Chapter 169
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Translator: penny
Chapter: 169
Chapter Title: Noah's Ark Project
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Breaking news.
Lee Ha-yul was sulking.
“…….”
The reason was simple.
Because I had left her behind on the Uyuni Salt Flats trip, which was registered as the top wish on Lee Ha-yul’s bucket list (length: 9 A4 pages).
Lee Ha-yul was furious.
And the way this little kid expressed her anger was utterly childish.
In other words, she had activated “From today onward, I resolve not only to be unable to speak but also unable to hear.”
“Ha-yul.”
“…….”
She turned her head to the left.
“Ha-yul. I said I’m sorry?”
“…….”
She turned her head to the right.
Even when I tried to meet her eyes, she kept turning her head.
Her head-turning was so perfectly timed that our gazes always drew parallel lines, like the legs of a synchronized swimming Olympian.
‘Ah.’
I knew this would happen.
That’s why, when we left for Uyuni, to Ha-yul’s question “Oppa, so where are we going?” I had vaguely replied, “Huh? Uh? Well, just somewhere nice, I guess.”
I thought we’d be back in a week at the latest.
Ha-yul’s soul was basically the Choi Young type, who views concern for others like a stone. She wouldn’t have worried about a week-long disappearance.
Or so I thought.
As revealed in the previous episode, I had properly fallen victim to an airline reservation scam.
The trip schedule had been massively extended from one week to three months.
Even the trip’s content had changed. We only enjoyed the Uyuni Salt Flats for two days. The remaining 87 days were a field trip called “How did Homo sapiens cross the Pacific to reach Hawaii? Isn’t it amazing? Let’s find out ourselves!”
There was no one to complain to.
Just like with humans, the concepts of “refund,” “fair compensation,” and “well-written apology letter” were extremely rare among the anomalies. The one who always bore the full loss was an innocent customer like me.
-Go die, you bastard….
-Oppa. So where did you go?
After going through hell and barely making it back to the Korean Peninsula, all that greeted me was No Do-ha’s choking grip and Ha-yul’s cold gaze.
An explanation was inevitable.
And that led to the current situation.
The world wasn’t some visual novel where affinity maxed out once and stayed that way forever. Once Ha-yul realized I had gone to the Uyuni Salt Flats without her, she started readjusting her affinity downward.
“Ha-yul? Won’t you talk to oppa?”
Lee Ha-yul pretended not to hear.
“Something’s off. I keep smelling old man from somewhere.”
My delicate middle-aged heart took a massive hit. I nearly flatlined.
‘Is this the father’s heart confronting his child’s rebellious phase!’
I had thought, as a regressor, I’d never experience such emotions in my lifetime, but to think it would happen like this.
I barely managed to open my mouth.
“…Let’s go to the Uyuni Salt Flats together later.”
She turned her head.
It was the first eye contact in three whole days. The jaw joint of the maid doll Ha-yul always carried suddenly became flexible.
“Later? When?”
“After summer ends. This fall.”
“Really?”
“Really. While we’re at it, let’s swing by Machu Picchu, climb up to Tenochtitlan, and do an America special trip.”
“Oppa, I love you!”
The sensation of false love enveloped my shoulders. I shuddered. How humiliating.
“…But in return, you really have to help out perfectly with the monsoon prep this time. No complaints, follow the guild master’s orders, okay?”
“Okay!”
My body now convulsed at the mere word “travel,” but there was no choice.
To safely get through the periodic disaster event that hit every year, Ha-yul’s assistance was absolutely necessary.
The event’s name was “Monsoon.”
Yes.
The catastrophe that instinctively filled every Korean with dread and fear. Summer’s big event was approaching.
2
Some of you might find it odd that, while spinning my tales so far, I’ve rarely brought up the “weather.”
A sharp observation indeed.
In fact, even without anomalies descending, Earth was experiencing apocalypse in real time.
Because of the weather.
The polar bears drifting down from the Arctic Ocean every year, sobbing in their ice chunk boats, were proof.
Climate apocalypse.
Literally, the hypothesis that the world might end due to climate change.
It was already considered a serious hypothesis, but the anomalies took it one step further.
-The Daegu weather is insane. Even for summer, how is the temperature 42 degrees? Is this a desert or a city?
-Wasn’t it actually a desert to begin with?
-What?
Daegu had become a desert.
Without any exaggeration—just straight-up desertification had occurred.
And it wasn’t just Daegu. North Korea’s Kaema Plateau had turned into a paradise for polar bears that migrated from Siberia. For the Baekdu Mountain Range tigers, who had dramatically signaled their revival as the anomaly called “Mountain Lord,” this was a tough new rival.
At least the Korean Peninsula had it easy.
Right next door, the Japanese archipelago was visited relentlessly by “earthquakes” every season.
Not ordinary ones, but all continent-scale anomalies called “Tokai Great Earthquake.” All sorts of earthquake-related anomalies mixed together and appeared.
That’s why I respect the archipelago’s magical girls.
Given the circumstances, humanity’s habitable zones were extremely limited.
In a sense, the “climate anomalies” were the greatest threat to Homo sapiens’ survival.
So, what climate specialty did Busan—the new capital of the Korean Peninsula, the sole hope, the last utopia—have?
“The monsoon will hit soon.”
“…….”
“…….”
Tension filled the conference room.
The gathering here, the heart of the National Highway Management Corps, was a tiny group.
But judging by faces alone, it was no exaggeration to call this place the heart of Busan—no, the entire Korean Peninsula.
National Highway Management Corps Leader No Do-ha. Operations Control Room Chief Yoo Ji-won. Guild Alliance Leader Dang Seo-rin. SG Net Operator Seo-gyu. Eastern Divine Holy Kingdom Saintess Sim A-ryeon, and so on.
“This monsoon is on a historic scale. If we don’t prepare thoroughly, the Korean Peninsula might evaporate during the rainy season.”
“You scare us with ‘historic scale’ every time. I don’t see what’s specifically different this time….”
“I witnessed it myself crossing the Pacific. Super-massive typhoons are forming in the western North Pacific.”
Dang Seo-rin flinched. Her complexion darkened rapidly, and her hands trembled.
This trip had left trauma for both her and me in many ways.
“Look at this.”
I pulled up the PPT.
It was a photo I had taken with the spirit camera even while relying on a wooden raft to cross the Pacific.
The current monsoon status.jpeg captured the “typhoon’s” appearance. No Do-ha’s brow furrowed upon seeing the evidence photo.
“What the hell is that…?”
“A typhoon.”
“Fuck, that’s not wind—it’s the ocean water rising up like a tornado. You’re saying that’s a typhoon…?”
“Don’t expect common sense from anomalies.”
Yes. This summer’s typhoon was a whopping 1,200 km in diameter.
And it was entirely made of “water.”
I don’t know who praised water as the mother of life, but seeing that typhoon would change their mind. Water kills people.
“Other regions can prepare as they do every year without major issues, but Busan is different. If it takes a direct hit, the whole city will turn into Atlantis. We need to devise countermeasures quickly.”
“Let’s dip….”
Shocking declaration! The National Highway Management Corps Leader suggests abandoning the capital!
No Do-ha had been infected by the anomaly that no Korean Peninsula ruler could avoid: “Capitals exist to be abandoned.”
I shook my head at No Do-ha, who looked ready to inherit the Joseon royal family’s specialty.
“We can’t run. Corps Leader.”
“Then we endure that? How? With what? I’d rather take a tsunami—that thing will push the coastline to Daegu the moment it makes landfall…? Best to evacuate all Busan citizens to Inunaki Tunnel and bolt to Seoul as a whole….”
I gave her a pitiful look.
“Corps Leader. We can’t avoid the monsoon typhoon. The moment Busan escapes unscathed, it will definitely hit another city.”
“Huh? What’s that supposed to…?”
“This isn’t a natural phenomenon—it’s an anomaly. The Korean Peninsula can’t get through the monsoon without damage. The anomaly will keep coming until there’s destruction, and the summer rainy season will continue. Someone has to take that 1,200 km water bomb.”
“…….”
“Is there a city as well-prepared as Busan? A region with power as concentrated? In the end, it’s most efficient if we block it. Otherwise, half the cities on the peninsula will be wiped out.”
“Shit….”
No Do-ha trembled at the anomaly’s brutality.
As the top leader’s mood soured, the conference room atmosphere naturally plummeted.
Among them, Sim A-ryeon—who thought side-eye was served in dog bowls—timidly raised her hand.
“Um, excuse me. Guild Master?”
“Speak.”
“Well, it doesn’t seem like the typhoon will reach Pyongyang Holy City. It’s not really related to my area. Can I head back now…?”
“For reference, a monsoon of this level will knock out SG Net too.”
“Huh? How long?”
“Well, at least half a month at minimum? Anomalies that destabilize internet comms during heavy rain always tag along.”
“The Eastern Divine Holy Kingdom will mobilize all its power to aid our brother comrades in Busan!”
Squeeze. Sim A-ryeon covered my hand with both of hers.
More serious and poignant than any gaze I’d seen from her—even more so than when she said, “I really love the café mocha the Guild Master treats me to.”
“Haa….”
No Do-ha scratched the back of her head furiously.
“Corps Leader. Sigh like that and disaster strikes.”
“Bullshit. Spare me the old man nagging. So how do we block that monstrous water bomb? You called this meeting because you have countermeasures, right…?”
“Of course. Everyone, pay attention here.”
I confidently advanced the PPT to the next slide.
It featured a trendy new-gen font stating the following.
[Monsoon Flood Damage Prevention Plan]
[STEP.1]
[No Do-ha Renaming Project!]
Silence fell over the conference room.
“…Huh?”
It took a while before No Do-ha reacted.
“Renaming? What the fuck kind of renaming…?”
“No Do-ha Corps Leader. It might be heartbreaking to change the precious name your parents gave you. But when dealing with anomalies, nothing is more important than names. For the safety of Busan’s innocent citizens, please—just for this summer—rename yourself.”
“No. I’m asking how the fuck my three-letter name relates to Busan’s safety…?”
“From now on, your name is no longer No Do-ha.”
I gazed seriously at the Korean Peninsula’s supreme leader.
“You are now ‘Noah.’”
“……?”
“What are you doing? Noah. Aren’t you going to build the ark?”
“You little shit—.”
Noah’s Ark construction project, begin!
3
The “Noah’s Ark” from the Bible boasts insane specs.
But what I’m focusing on isn’t the ark—it’s the man Noah. My guess is he was undoubtedly an ancient archmage.
First off, Noah stored every animal and plant on Earth inside a mere 135-meter-long ship.
That naturally included blue whales and all sorts of fish. Proof that the world’s largest super-aquarium was installed inside the ark.
In other words, Noah’s Ark definitely had an “infinite inventory” spell.
And this infinite subspace was made 100% of pure wood. Because Noah was from the Bronze Age.
Whether modern engineering deems it impossible is irrelevant.
Science advances with time, but magic grows stronger the further back you go.
For the ancient archmage Noah, reinforcing wood to steel levels was just a given.
Unfortunately, the modern Noah (formerly No Do-ha) who reappeared on the Korean Peninsula had zero magical talent.
Instead, there was a separate archmage to serve as Noah’s magic wand.
“Ah—aaah—ah—.”
Dang Seo-rin. The Awakener with historic-level magical talent sang from Geumjeong Mountain, Busan’s highest elevation.
Crunch-crackle-snap-creak-.
Then, the trees—moved by the outdoor concert quality—uprooted themselves and gathered along Geumjeong Mountain’s smooth ridgeline.
Yes. Though I haven’t mentioned it often in my tales, Dang Seo-rin’s Song Enchantment magic shone in support roles like this. She didn’t earn the Giant Potato Castle Robot award in other loops for nothing.
Wearing a helmet labeled “Safety First,” I smiled in satisfaction.
“The ark construction is going smoothly.”
“…….”
“Then, No Do—er, Noah Corps Leader. I leave it to you. Please kneel up front.”
At the Geumjeong Mountain ridgeline worksite, it wasn’t just Dang Seo-rin—me, Noah, Sim A-ryeon, and Ha-yul were gathered.
And one more surprising guest had joined.
The indispensable role in the Noah’s Ark play. The actor taking on the “God” role, as crucial as Noah.
It was Mo Gwang-seo Jesus Christ.
“Ha-yul, ready?”
“Yeah.”
“Good. Then… Noah, what are you doing? Hurry and kneel before Mo Gwang-seo Christ. Oh, prostrating is fine too.”
“…….”
Rarely, No Do-ha’s lips quivered. A nameplate reading “Noah” hung on her chest.
“You really, truly have to do this nonsense? Undertaker Awakener…?”
“We do.”
My answer was firm.
“We’re using the world’s most powerful myth, Genesis. We need the bare minimum setup for ‘Noah’s Ark’ to work.”
“…….”
“Hurry up already?”
No Do-ha knelt with an expression cursing the entire world.
Then Mo Gwang-seo looked down at her.
With the same infinitely compassionate smile as always.
Of course, Mo Gwang-seo had no free will whatsoever. Every movement and line was controlled by his puppeteer, Ha-yul.
Mo Gwang-seo (feat. Ha-yul) opened his mouth.
“The corruption of all living beings has spread widely upon the earth, so the day of their end has come before Me. Now I will destroy all living beings along with the earth.”
“…….”
“Noah. Therefore, build the ark.”
Noah’s lips quivered, her tongue trembled, her teeth ground, and she muttered lowly.
“Yeeesss….”
God commanded, and Noah obeyed.
A perfect reenactment of the Genesis oracle!
The minor glitch that the actor cast as God was also playing God’s son didn’t matter. Anomalies didn’t nitpick historical accuracy that much.
Now, No Do-ha was truly and rightfully Noah.
Every ship she oversaw from now on would serve as an “ark.”
“Fuck, what a shitty world….”
The actor playing Noah cursed a bit much for humanity’s savior, but that didn’t matter either.
“You regressor bastard, you’re getting revenge for me ripping into you about that 3-month disappearance, right…?”
Absurd slander. Where else was a regressor as strict about separating work and personal as me?
I gazed wistfully at the Busan sea.
July. The SSS-grade mega-monsoon was advancing on the Korean Peninsula.
It was summer.