Chapter 136
Chapter 136
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Translator: penny
Chapter: 136
Chapter Title: The Pretender I
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Shin Noah
1
If you’ve followed my story this far, you might have vaguely caught on.
My tale is missing an essential element of genre fiction.
This element is so crucial that without it, you’d get scolded with, “What’s the point of being the protagonist?”
It’s “monopoly on fortuitous encounters.”
Take O Dok-seo from the 555th cycle, for example. The moment she realized she’d entered the novel’s world, didn’t she think this?
[O Dok-seo: Whatever. In the Busan Station arc, the key is securing the elixir hidden in Haeundae as early as possible. That’s all that matters.]
Ah, fortuitous encounters! Such a sweet ring to it.
Elixirs that boost your realm in one go. Secret manuals buried midway up a cliff for some reason. Gaslighting the world’s strongest being—who’d otherwise shatter your psyche—into depending on you through early education. Farming items whose value no one yet recognizes.
Snagging those lightly.
And coolly murmuring,
‘Lucky me.’
That’s the dignity granted to protagonists in genre literature.
No use hiding it.
Back in my youth, I, the Undertaker, was pretty lucky too.
I was practically a “fortune hunter” actively seeking them out.
If I entered a Void, it meant there was a rare item exclusive to that place to farm.
The same went for anomalies. I’d kept it secret from you all until now, but the “Ten Tribes’ Heart” was actually an incredible rare item. Eating it raw sashimi-style builds a year’s worth of internal energy effortlessly (tastes close to tuna belly).
But that was then. These days, I no longer cling to such items.
I actively avoid them.
Unless they’re absolutely essential, I pass. If they’re too good to pass up, I hand them to someone else.
“What... Why on earth?”
O Dok-seo once frowned upon hearing my policy.
At the time, she was taking a break from writing down my tale. She seemed a bit drained, so I specially filleted a Ten Tribes’ Heart and made Ten Tribes sushi for her.
O Dok-seo munched away, murmuring, “This really tastes like genuine tuna sashimi...” before continuing.
“Are you some hipster uncle? Do you think monopolizing fortuitous encounters as the protagonist is too predictable or something?”
“No way. If possible, I’d love to monopolize them too. With my [Continue] ability, the more I snag, the better.”
“Then why... Ah! Is it because your allies benefiting more from them is more efficient than you consuming them?”
“Hmm. That’s part of it... but showing you is faster.”
I enjoyed educating O Dok-seo on “anomaly intel” like this. It’d help her later.
I opened my subspace trunk bag and pulled out a notebook along with one item, thunking it onto the table.
O Dok-seo’s eyes went wide.
As expected of an otaku, she recognized the familiar shape.
“...What’s this? Isn’t it the [Monkey’s Paw]?”
“Oh. You spotted it right away.”
Monkey’s Paw.
Just as the name suggests, this anomaly resembles a monkey’s paw and grants three wishes.
But true to its anomalous nature, it doesn’t fulfill them in any normal way.
Daring to cheat life brings “misfortune” in some form.
Wish for “immortality!” and it won’t grant eternal youth, leaving you to savor an eternal silver life of endless aging.
Wish for “immortality and eternal youth!” and after Earth’s end, you’re left unscathed, drifting infinitely through space alone.
Wish for “immortality and eternal youth, but let me end my life anytime!” and it’ll unleash horrifically tragic events around you nonstop—figure you still won’t die anyway.
Forced loss?
Yeah. That’s exactly it.
That forced loss is the essence of the [Monkey’s Paw] anomaly.
Wishing without side effects is impossible from the start. It’s like the dark evolution, alter version of a genie’s magic lamp.
“Strictly speaking, this is a monkey’s paw and a human hand at the same time.”
“Huh? What do you mean?”
“When I found it, someone had already made all three wishes.”
“Eek.”
Unfortunately, this apocalyptic world had already fully manifested the Monkey’s Paw’s curse.
“O Dok-seo. If someone who thinks they’re clever but doesn’t yet grasp what anomalies are found the [Monkey’s Paw], what wishes would they make?”
“...It has a total of three wish slots. First, they’d wish, ‘Eliminate any side effects from my wishes.’”
I smiled faintly.
“Good. Next?”
“Uh... ‘Remove the limit on the number of wishes’? Three feels too few. Sure, modern settings often skip granting that, but you’ve gotta try.”
“Wow. How exactly alike.”
“Huh?”
“I’ll explain later. Anyway, so what’s the final wish?”
“Hmm...”
O Dok-seo popped another piece of Ten Tribes sushi into her mouth before speaking.
“It’s tempting, but I’d wish, ‘Grant me luck.’”
“......”
“The Monkey’s Paw brings misfortune to the user. Counter that. Max out my luck from the start, and the misfortune itself gets suppressed.”
I couldn’t hold back a wry smile.
O Dok-seo’s answer was textbook. Cheon Yo-hwa, Lee Ha-yul, and Seo-gyu gave similar responses.
Details varied, but the goal was the same: “Overcome the Monkey’s Paw’s limits and side effects.”
“You’re right. Whoever found it would wish roughly the same things.”
“Ah, yeah.”
I took a sip of my café au lait.
Then I glanced at the notebook sitting beside the Monkey’s Paw on the table.
“That’s why I can no longer monopolize fortuitous encounters.”
2
The first place I found the Monkey’s Paw was Jeju Island.
I was exploring the Tutorial Dungeon that had appeared at Seongsan Ilchulbong.
That dungeon was a Void themed [School Trip], and chronologically, it emerged among the earliest Tutorial Dungeons alongside Baekhwa Girls’ High School.
Inside the Tutorial Dungeon, Seongsan Ilchulbong’s elevation had grown to Everest heights, or so they said.
By the time I arrived, the tutorial had long ended, and the peak had returned to normal size.
In the long-cleared exam hall of the tutorial, I poked around for any salvageable items.
‘Plenty of corpses.’
No standout items caught my eye. But as a former Tutorial Dungeon site, the trail entrance was littered with bones and bodies.
‘Anyone I know?’
Checking IDs and cards on the corpses near the entrance, most were Japanese.
Roughly 16 bodies.
Not unusual. My Busan Station Tutorial Dungeon had a few Japanese like Uehara Shino too.
Jeju, closer to Japan than Busan, must have summoned even more.
“Hm?”
That’s when I spotted a “peculiar corpse” near the summit.
It was covered in thick fur first off.
Beyond thick—practically slathered in hair growth serum. At a glance, you’d mistake it for an animal carcass or a bush, not human.
Even its position was suspiciously perfect.
On a slope far from the tourist path. Hidden at just the angle out of sight.
‘A tutorial casualty too?’
The corpse clutched a thick notebook in both hands.
Thinking it a last testament, I picked up the notebook.
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《Day 1》
Just in case, I’m writing this diary to prepare for the worst.
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The testament was in Japanese, not Korean.
Flip. Without much thought, I turned to the front page.
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The world’s gone weird.
It was already weird, but now even more so. People are dying ridiculously easily.
But I’m lucky! When dragged to this mysterious place, a “Monkey’s Paw” was right in front of me.
Thanks to watching the Monogatari series back then, I recognized it instantly.
Who knew my ex-girlfriend’s otaku hobby would help.
Thanks, Sena. I’ll even forgive you for cheating with other girls.
The Koreans around didn’t seem to know what it was. Scared someone might catch on, I quickly stuffed it in my backpack.
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Monkey’s Paw?
I looked back at the corpse. Fur so thick even the face was unrecognizable.
‘Hm. Now that you mention it, definitely monkey-like fur...?’
Had this person wished on the Monkey’s Paw and ended up possessed by the anomaly?
Flip. I kept turning pages.
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《Day 2》
What wishes would you make if you got a “Monkey’s Paw”?
Sena and I chatted about it once.
Thought it was just idle talk, but to think such fortune would really come my way.
Feels like fate.
Even with its side effects, abandoning the Monkey’s Paw would be idiotic. People are dropping dead left and right. I have to survive somehow.
If I don’t think that way, I can’t endure watching them die. I want gyudon and pineapple.
――――――――――
Borrowing an anomaly’s power.
“Hm.”
That was the mindset of someone not yet accustomed to the apocalypse.
Even I, with hundreds of cycles, could barely utilize Tutorial Fairies or Inunaki Tunnel. And those came with heavy restrictions.
A path beginners shouldn’t tread lightly.
But I could understand the gamble in a survival threat.
Flip. Kept reading.
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《Day 3》
The summoned Japanese banded together into a party. This girl You was strong.
But she insisted opening everyone’s backpacks to share resources. Crazy? It’s private property.
Want to join another group, but most are Korean and communication’s tough. I asked for one night to think.
You stared blankly and said do whatever.
What a disagreeable girl. Fine, I will.
Planning to use the “Monkey’s Paw” tonight.
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Flip.
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《Day 4》
I’d meticulously planned my Monkey’s Paw wishes for days.
In order:
1. No matter what I wish for, don’t create any side effects.
2. Remove the limit on wish count. If impossible, disregard this wish.
3. Grant me luck. Make me avoid all “accidental misfortunes” like dying to a falling rock.
The core of these wishes is the third: “luck.”
Considered other cheat powers but rejected them all. No matter how strong, if the Monkey’s Paw brings “misfortune,” I’d be helpless.
Luck. Before overwhelming luck, any power or misfortune pales.
Maybe the Monkey’s Paw pulls tricks while I wish sequentially.
It’s a demon at heart, after all.
So I’ll write the three wishes on paper and shove them all at once.
Honestly, no clue how it’ll go. Feels prepared, but just in case, leaving this diary like a will.
If I fail, may whoever finds it use it wiser.
Here I go.
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“......”
Before I knew it, I was engrossed in this nameless Awakener’s diary.
Judging by the corpse, they’d failed. But failure teaches as much as success.
This Awakener followed the basics against anomalies and Voids: “Leave records for others.”
So this corpse and I were comrades navigating the apocalypse together.
Flip. My touch on the testament grew gentler.
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《Day 5》
I did it!
On night watch, centaur monsters raided the dungeon. But somehow, they completely ignored me, going only for others.
Half the group died, but I wasn’t scratched. Even our strongest, You, got wounded.
Amazingly, wishes 1 and 2 worked perfectly! Unlimited wishes unlocked! Hooray!
With certainty I’d never die stupidly, I relaxed. Even You’s face doesn’t annoy me now.
Incredible. It’s real.
Wished the Monkey’s Paw for “gyudon.” Killed a monster, and gyudon dropped. So casual I laughed.
Got 6 bowls, shared with group. You’s blank face went wide.
Yeah. That’s your role. Mere extra.
Half the numbers, but gyudon power boosted morale. Rediscovered food’s value.
Thanks, Sena! It’s all you! Even forgive your four-timing while dating me!
――――――――――
Trembling uncontrollably in the handwriting conveyed itself.
In my mind, I pictured someone betting their life on all-in, finally succeeding, cheering in triumph. A victory declaration.
But unlike the diary’s owner, I stayed cautious.
‘If they’d truly won, they wouldn’t be a corpse now.’
Joy continued through Days 6, 7, 8, 9, 10. Entries grew sporadic after Day 11.
Farther in, the diary resumed. The handwriting shook from a different angle.
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《Day 6??》
Something’s wrong. Really wrong.
Woke up to centaurs raiding. Felt familiar—exact same as Day 5.
Half the group died. You wounded in the same spot. All events repeated identically.
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