The Gumiho Comb That Reads as an Adult Toy

"Gumiho Comb" written on it, but it reads as adult toy. Alright, calm down first. Calm down and assess the situation. Yeah, they say even if you enter a tiger's den, you ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠can come back alive if you keep your wits about you.

I took a moment for some deep breaths, then sorted out my current predicament.

First off, the most important question: Can I turn back into a guy? ...No. Not a chance. Cold hard truth—zero possibility. Just like the elixir's description said, there's only one bottle in the entire world... Unless a miracle happens, going back to being male is impossible. Hell, the alchemist who made it isn't even in this world anymore, so no hoping for a remake. And it's S+ grade to boot. No way something that insanely rare ends up in my hands again.

"...Life's a real bitch, fuck."

So the conclusion is, I've ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠gotta live the rest of my life in this inconvenient, trashy body? No matter how I spin it, that's it. Damn, I'm only this clear-headed when shit hits the fan. Guess I'll have to give up on turning back male. They say letting go makes it easier, but why do I still feel so damn uncomfortable?

Especially the weight of these massive tits. How the hell am I supposed to live like this!

"...Alright, think positive. Better than croaking from elixir side effects, right?"

My brilliant life plan went down the drain, but I can just make a new one. I headed to the bathroom, splashed cold water on my face to clear my head. That's when I caught sight of my reflection in the mirror.

...This face is seriously hard to get used to.

Okay, so I suddenly turned into a woman out of nowhere—total chaos, sure. But it's about time I figured out my abilities. Time to learn what that portal is and why items keep popping out of it.

But first things first: check my physical changes. Anyone with mana has way superior physical stats compared to normies, right?

Hmm, simplest way to test at home? Grip strength test, obviously. Some folks can crush rebar one-handed, so I couldn't help getting excited.

I've spent a solid 24 years trying every damn trick to awaken mana. That primal human craving for power! Sure, I turned into a girl, but now I've got mana—no reason to be all negative.

Hell, if I punched the wall full force right now, I'd probably walk away without a scratch. Worry more about punching a hole through it.

I rummaged through the room for something to smash. My gig? Reviewing random junk on stream. So my room's littered with all sorts of crap and items, naturally.

"Hmm, this'll do, but... kinda wasteful."

I picked up an E-grade shield—decent for newbie hunters. ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠Not top performance, but famous for durability, cheap price, and popular as a starter item.

...Cheap my ass, it's nearly a million won. Items start at that baseline, even E-grade. Which makes chugging an S+ elixir the kind of move only the world's biggest idiot would pull.

Anyway, I set the shield on the floor and hesitated.

...Still feels wasteful no matter how I look at it. Screw it—a measly million-won shield ain't shit. Figuring out my stats is priority.

Decision made, I raised my fist sky-high.

"Hoo, hoo... Alright, crush it in one go."

I held my breath—hng—and slammed my fist down with everything I had.

Then—crack!—the shield shattered in... Huh? Why the hell does hitting a metal shield make a crack? Should be a clang or tang, right?

Looking down, the shield was pristine, not a scratch. My hand, though...

"Kyaaahhh! Ow, it hurts...! Hiss, hnggg!"

Ah. Shattered my ass—the crack was my hand.

* * *

A few days later, I'd gotten a pretty good grasp on my abilities.

In summary: Once a day, I can open a portal and pull out a random item. Weird as fuck ability, yeah? Not combat, not support—just plain bizarre.

Physical stats at rock bottom, useless in fights, so hunter life's off the table.

First few days, I despaired over turning female and being unviable as a hunter. But I decided to stay positive.

...At least I can sell the portal loot and live like a baller? My bank account's a joke right now, but soon it'll be stacked with zeros.

"No brainer—sell this shit now!"

I lined up the items I'd pulled the past few days, then frowned.

"...Sigh. Why are they all such ambiguous trash no one wants?"

'Nameless Soldier's Shield', 'Orc Warrior's Sturdy Club'—all cheap crap for newbie hunters.

...Plus some with unknown uses.

Gumiho Comb? Even after years reviewing items on stream, first time seeing this type. What the fuck do you even do with it?

The description didn't help either.

"Where the hell did this crap even come ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠from...?"

Is this even an item? It's just... everyday grooming tool for the gumiho species, right?

That first elixir was insane luck. Or rather, misfortune.

If I keep pulling ambiguous junk like this, I'm screwed... Still, gotta test it, yeah?

Most items need mana to activate. Back when I had none, I couldn't use shit despite streaming reviews. But now...

Fine, worth a shot. I channeled mana into my hand and started combing my hair.

Swish. Swish. Swish. Swish.

Oh? Feels pretty good actually? Gumiho exclusive, but works fine on humans.

Hmm, but something's off. The more I comb...

An unfamiliar feeling wells up—itchy chest, hot head, just feels so damn good.

I kept combing, entranced.

"Hng, ung, heung... Haah, feels so good..."

...Huh? Wh-what was that sound from my mouth? Sounded like some super lewd moan...?

Snapping out of it, I realized my hand had wandered to my massive tits without me noticing.

...My hand was moving on its own, against my will.

D-danger. This thing's straight from the devil.

I barely clung to reason and yanked the comb away. The euphoria melted away like snow.

A twinge of regret, but if I'd kept going... I'd probably off myself from shame.

"Why the hell did I do that...? Oh, new effect unlocked!"

I quickly appraised it again. Sure enough, a new line appeared.

"Holy fucking shit!"

I couldn't help but freak out at the effect.

So this is... basically a sex toy for humans? Might be everyday for gumihos, but for us, pure adult product.

Using something that insane and enjoying it... Feels so taboo.

...Gonna stash this one at home. Too embarrassing to sell, and... y'know, might need it someday.