Last Will and a Bolt from the Blue

"I'm telling you, the kid fainted."

The doctor launched into a heated argument with whoever was on the other end of the line.

He'd requested a police officer, but it seemed personnel were stretched thin after the large-scale terrorist attack not long ago.

"Just come take a look! The kid's forehead is bright red right now, okay? You think I'd waste your manpower calling for nothing? Just send someone over once to check."

"No, that female officer, right? There's also a suspected sexual harassment situation here. He said her fair soft flesh was warm and beautiful. Yes, yes."

"Ha. A women's and youth affairs officer getting pulled into a terrorist investigation… What a world we're living in."

The doctor hung up and let out a long sigh.

I asked,

"Are the police coming?"

The doctor nodded.

"Just wait here a bit."

"Why?"

"…Why, you ask?"

He blinked for a moment, then put on an awkward smile.

"Well… I'm worried about how well Pecia is adjusting to her foster home. Don't be too nervous. They'll just ask a few questions and leave."

"Ahh, okay."

"Here, have some of these while we wait."

I must have looked pretty pitiful. The doctor kept offering me all kinds of snacks and drinks — not the tea and traditional crackers old men eat, but stuff that actually hit a kid's sweet tooth dead-on.

It had been a while since anyone treated me to anything, so I accepted them obediently and ate. At some point, my eyes met the doctor's as he bustled about pouring chocolate milk, and his smile looked so strangely sad that a laugh burst out of me.

"Ahaha!"

"…?"

I hastily wiped the grin off my face and buried my head back in the snack plate. The doctor narrowed his eyes and stared at me, but I deliberately pretended not to notice.

"D-Doctor, the mole on your forehead looks like the Buddha. Sorry."

"Ah—."

Only then did the doctor laugh and touch his forehead. It wasn't even centered, so the excuse was pure nonsense — but then again, fifteen was the age where you laughed at a falling leaf.

He didn't seem to find it particularly strange.

Noticing the empty drink cup, the doctor asked,

"Want me to get you more?"

"No. I'm fine. Got any water?"

"There's a water cooler outside. Help yourself."

"Okay."

The water cooler was outside the exam room…

I'd stuffed myself with snacks and was full, and I was already exhausted from being dragged around without even getting to rest at home. I gauged the situation for a moment, then tried again.

"Water."

"…?"

The doctor showed no sign of budging, so this time I scrunched up my whole face and pounded my chest.

"Water! Water!"

"Ah, right, right."

He dashed out and came back a few seconds later with a cup of water. Then he sat down in the chair across from me, propped both elbows on the desk, and laced his fingers together.

He looked at me quietly and asked,

"Feeling a little better now?"

"Huh? Ah, yes, yes."

"You should eat slowly."

"Got it."

I was full anyway. No intention of eating more.

The doctor checked his watch, hesitated a moment, then said,

"…Looks like we've got a little time left. Mind if I ask a few more questions in the meantime?"

"Uh. Sure, whatever. Urgh—."

"…."

The doctor smacked his lips once, then asked,

"Back when you saw the hospital collapse — you asked me if I was open for business. That wasn't just to mess with me, right?"

"Right."

"Yeah, that's how it looked to me too. But you know — do you have any idea what most people think when they see a scene like that?"

"Dunno. What do they think?"

The doctor smiled faintly.

"They figure of course I can't practice. My workplace just collapsed. And they assume a doctor's mood would 'naturally' be terrible, so most of them offer a word of encouragement and move on."

I nodded along.

"I see."

"So why did you ask it that way? I'm not blaming you ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠— just curious."

"I figured you were running the hospital with a black-market flea-market concept."

"…."

The doctor's smile froze solid.

"…One last thing."

"Yes."

"That comment about fair soft flesh earlier — under what circumstances did that come up? Does Hunter Kang Jiye touch you like that on a regular basis?"

"Fair soft flesh? When did I ever say that?"

At that, the doctor reached for the phone and dialed.

"Please cancel the dispatch to Na Byeonghwa Psychiatric Clinic. My apologies."

His entire demeanor flipped. He pointed firmly at the patient chair and ordered,

"Sit up straight, patient. We're beginning the examination."

I didn't get home until a full two hours later. Even accounting for travel time, that meant I'd been held at the psych clinic for at least an hour and a half.

Were psychiatric appointments always this long? I had no idea. In my previous life, I'd never had anything to do with this field.

The moment I opened the door, Kang Jiye greeted me warmly.

"Oh my, my little cutie~ Did everything go well?"

"Yes. But outside, there's a police car…"

"Aigoo— you don't have to say a word. First time with that kind of treatment, so it was hard, right? This mom's been through it all, so I understand. There's a present for you inside, so hurry on in!"

"A present? What present?"

"Come on— in we go!"

Kang Jiye herded me along, thumping my back. Meanwhile Yena scampered over and shut the front door, and the Party Bears settled near the veranda and started rolling around.

A peaceful everyday scene, no different from usual.

Hehe.

Was this what it felt like to be a kid with normal parents?

I looked at Kang Jiye and said,

"Um, I don't need a present."

Kang Jiye's smile deepened.

"What kind of talk is that? You don't need a present?"

"For me, a mother's love is the present."

"Giving a gift to a good child like that is a parent's joy. And you're mistaken about something — this isn't ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠optional."

"…."

Before I knew it, we'd arrived at my door. It was my bedroom, but today it looked strangely bleak.

"What kind of present is it, exactly…"

"Go in."

"Ah, I, I need to use the bathroom first! Then after that."

"The bathroom?"

"Yes."

"Alright."

Present, my ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠ass. Soundproofing magic was layered thick over the entire bedroom. Walking in like this was just death.

I'd escape through a Gate first, then wait until "Mom's" anger cooled off.

"Then your pretty little daughter is just going to pee— WAAK! WAAAAK! Why are you following me in—!"

Thud!

The bathroom door slammed shut, and immediately a chaotic racket of two people wrestling erupted. Then came a string of sounds like porcelain shattering. Pecia screamed.

Thwack! Thwack! Thwack!

"Ack! Ack! The crown of my head! Spare me! Ack! I'm sorry!"

"Hold still! Huh? You're pinching your own mother?"

"Huuuung—!!!"

A wail rang out, thick with the bitterness of a plan exposed and the injustice of getting beaten without a chance to run.

Kang Jiye shouted,

"I told you to go behave yourself, and instead you sweet-talked the doctor? Word's already spread all over my workplace! I got reported for child abuse! Do you know how hard the Director laughed? I can't live like this, I really can't!"

In the end, I was locked in my bedroom until I reflected properly.

I had to leave the Gate open in Yena's room, and Kang Jiye was guarding the bedroom entrance, so there was no way out.

But Eldrisa apparently had some business with me, because she slipped in quietly behind Kang Jiye's back. She picked up the A4 sheet lying next to me and asked,

"Is this the material the humans used to examine Your Majesty's psychology?"

"…Yeah."

"Let's see…"

"…Impressive."

I'd already read it once, but the guy had basically written a whole thesis. Rather than feeling bad about it, though, a strange sense of satisfaction welled up. Anyone could tell the diagnosis was loaded with emotion.

In other words — I'd dominated the feelings of that oh-so-great psychiatrist.

Eldrisa looked down at me with interest.

"…It's a bit ambiguous to call them disorders, but they did pin down Your Majesty's characteristics rather well. I think I understand how Royalty appears in human eyes."

"What do you think?"

"About what?"

"Aren't I amazing? I achieved a hextuple crown that no one has ever managed before."

Eldrisa let out a hollow laugh, and Kang Jiye shouted from outside the door.

"Are you going to reflect properly or not? Eldrisa, out. I told you not to go in."

"Fine, fine. …Take care, Your Majesty."

I stuck right behind Eldrisa as she opened the door.

Grab—! I looked up at Kang Jiye with a pitiful expression as she seized the back of my neck.

"Ah, I ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠reflected a lot… And I'm past the age for this kind of treatment, you know."

Kang Jiye said,

"Then will you apologize?"

"To who?"

"To the police officers. Do you know how many of them wasted a trip because of you in the middle of this busy crisis?"

"But thanks to me, a lot of people lived. I prevented things from getting even busier, didn't I? That more than makes up for it."

Kang Jiye clicked her tongue and crossed her arms.

"Refusing to admit your mistakes is also a kind of mental illness. You're a perfectly fine kid — why are you so stubborn?"

"…I'm a magical beast, though?"

"No. You're human. You're my daughter."

"…."

"Yes or no."

Well, that left me with nothing to say.

I already knew that after Kim Seojun's visit, the way she addressed me had expanded. The fact made me happy, but it was also a burden. I could feel Kang Jiye's determination to educate me into a perfect human and make me adapt from now on.

Kang Jiye asked again.

"What's it going to be? Back in the room, or apologize to the police."

"…I'll apologize."

Only then did Kang Jiye smile and nod.

"Good. What a good girl. That's my daughter."

And so, a short while later.

"I said I'm sorry! I said I'm sorry, so why do you keep scolding me!"

"I'm not scolding you. It's just that hearing something nice come out of your mouth in this situation is what's weird."

"Anyway, you can't just treat people that cold and curt. Did everyone here have their period and a wet dream today?"

"What? Hey, what did you just say!"

…Yeah. I never thought this would be easy.

Kang Jiye watched quietly as Pecia bickered with the officers. That was just how prideful Pecia was.

Now that her cheap excuses had been cut off, she'd try somehow to resolve her own wrongdoing.

Kang Jiye was curious how she'd go about it.

At that moment, an angry male officer snapped in a fit of temper,

"Then go catch the terrorists yourself! Barging in out of nowhere like this."

Pecia's eyes went wide as she asked,

"So if I catch them, we're good? Then it means I didn't do anything wrong?"

"Yeah, sure, go catch them! Catch even one and I'll change my last name!"

"What if I catch several?"

By this point the officer was so floored he laughed.

"Then you can cut open my belly."