Anyway, It Doesn't Seem to Be My Fault
Anyway, it doesn't look like it's my fault. The Adventurer's Guild is the continent's largest armed organization, and at the same time, a neutral body that doesn't bow to any religion or nation. Someone might ask how the continent's biggest powerhouse can stay neutral. I'd answer like this: it's because it's neutral that it became the continent's largest armed force.
People tied to other factions can join the guild, and free-spirited powerhouses who hate meddling from specific powers don't hesitate to sign up either. The guild just connects clients with solvers—it doesn't impose any duties on its members. That policy let it swell in size easily.
Of course, the guild's approach has its downsides. Plenty of nominal members, but not enough loyal ones who'd risk their necks in a crisis. That's why we're in this mess right now.
“Eek, what the hell is that? Scary...”
“What's that guild guard doing hiding under the table?”
“Shut up! My life matters too!”
The Hero took my advice that adventures always start at the guild and headed to a nearby city's branch like a normal person. But the moment she pushed open the door, the inside looked like it'd been bombed to hell. People panicked at the sight of her and bolted in a mass exodus.
The quick or lucky ones fled upstairs. The rest huddled pathetically in corners, eyes darting to her. That's the scene now.
Why's everyone freaking out? Feels like they've run into a disaster-class monster or something.
...Grind. You really asking 'cause you don't know?
Yeah. No way the Vatican slapped a warrant on the Hero that fast. She just looks like a mysterious beauty from the outside—why's everyone so terrified?
It's all your fault! You damn sword!
“That sword on her hip... that's really it, right...?”
“Yeah, the demonic sword that serves the Demon King as its master! Which means its owner is...”
Looks like while I was half-forced into seclusion, some ridiculous rumors spread. To shut down that nonsense, I spoke up.
Hey, what're you talking about? My master's not the Demon King—she's the Hero.
“Eek! The sword's talking!”
The burly adventurer crammed under the table ditched his buddy, panicked, and bolted straight for the upstairs stairs.
“Keurk!”
Poor guy—the door to the second floor had been locked ages ago. He slammed into it headfirst and collapsed, blood trickling from his forehead.
Dead?
“Johnson's dead!”
“My god. Just talking to it drove a man mad enough to kill himself... What a horrific demonic sword!”
No, we just came to pick up a quest—what the hell is this circus? Only one way to sort this chaos.
Get the manager!
No, heal that guy first...
“My god, and the sword has multiple personalities too!”
I'm gonna lose it for real. Everyone shut up and get the manager!
As I barked at the first-floor adventurers—too annoyed to explain anymore—noise erupted from upstairs. The door splintered, and someone was dragged down.
Not quite on the level of the paladins from the Vatican, but still a powerhouse by human standards. If he weren't trembling thirty times a second, he'd look pretty cool.
“Wh-wh-what's g-g-going on? I-I'm K-Kale, branch manager of the Hire Adventurer's Guild.”
What? We're the ones who wanna know. We just came to register like normal people?
“R-really? Then why the D-Demon K—gasp!”
No, what's this Demon King crap? I keep telling you, she's the Hero.
“Haven't you heard the street rumors? 'If the demonic sword Carbalt escapes the Vatican's secret vault, it will serve the Demon King, and soon an era of war will engulf the world.'”
Rumors that specific? Lucky for me, I had a comeback.
That's wrong! 'Cause my master's not the Demon King—she's the Hero.
“R-really? I can't believe it.”
Hah, what're you gonna do if a nobody like you doesn't believe it? Lose an arm and maybe you'll buy it?
His face drained pale at my threat. Huh, this is kinda fun. Been too long since I came out—petty chaos like this gets my tension rising.
Sigh, hate to agree with him, but it's true this time. She is the Hero.
“That voice—another personality of the demonic sword?”
...It's the Holy Sword. Take a good look at her left hip.
Couldn't stand watching me anymore, so the Holy Sword—silent till now from the shock of failure—butted in. She glowed to prove herself.
“Gasp!”
Hero? There's an injured lamb over there. Could you grace them with your merciful touch?
The Holy Sword, minding her image in front of people. The Hero—who'd just been listening—finally reacted. She nodded lightly and stood before Johnson, passed out and bleeding at the stairs.
As she spread her hand, golden flames bloomed from her fingertips. She brushed his forehead gently, and the wound vanished like it'd been washed away. Divine power—above nature's laws, wielding destruction and creation.
“The Demon King couldn't wield divine power, and if that's really the Holy Sword, then you...”
“Yeah.” For the first time without borrowing her sword's mouth, the Hero opened her own lips and declared calmly.
“I'm the Hero.”
“My god! Such rudeness from us!”
Better than Demon King, but Heroes get treated like walking disasters too. Kale bowed again, face ashen.
“Wait, then... what about that... demonic sword?”
Good question. Come to think of it, why'd she really bring me? But as the Hero went silent again, I had to speak up.
That's...
Hahaha. It's so vicious and horrific that the Hero took it into her own hands to manage! It's trash that should be destroyed immediately, but she nobly volunteered for the sacrifice.
Before I could even finish, the Holy Sword machine-gunned words to block me. That explanation reeks of malice.
We'll settle this later.
Ha! Think I'm scared of the likes of you?
As the Holy Sword and I bickered, Kale wiped his dripping sweat. Sensing the mood ease, the hiding adventurers crept out.
“Ha, haha. We understand perfectly.”
Doesn't look like it.
“So, as you mentioned earlier, Hero, you're here to register with the guild?”
“Yeah.”
“We've been too rude to such a precious guest. We'll handle it right away. This way.”
We headed to the branch manager's office on the second floor, leaving the chaos behind. Kale shot death glares at the adventurers who'd dragged him out, but I'll pretend I didn't see.
The panic hadn't reached the office—it was neat and smelled of books. He tossed his sweat rag and pulled up a chair.
“Haha, we'd love to give special treatment, but as you know, registration has procedures...”
“Yeah, I'm fine.”
“Thank you for understanding. Then, please grasp this orb.”
He pulled out something familiar to me: the ability measurement orb. As expected, it displays the holder's abilities. Kinda like my Status Window in a way. Though the gap between them is vast.
The Hero placed her hand on it, and it hummed, spitting out info.
Average Ability:S+
Representative Trait:Trinity (???)
“An... astonishing result...”
I didn't say it, but I agreed inwardly. Way too many monsters in this world. I got stronger as a sword than as a human, but still can't match real deal freaks head-on. Especially stuck as a sword that can't move alone.
“Normally it'd take a week, but I'll rush it. Please wait a moment.”
Kale approached a brass turtle-shaped artifact in the corner. Before operating it, he turned to the Hero.
“By the way, may I have your name?”
“Cream.”
Her name's not Hero?!
Don't be stupid. Who names someone Hero?
Can't argue! But it showed up like that in the Status Window. As I pondered, Kale finished and pulled a round disc from the turtle's mouth. The Hero took the fresh-off-the-press badge—proof of her guild membership from this moment.
Name: Cream
Rank:Bronze (0/50)
Average Ability: S+
Representative Trait:Trinity (S+)
The badge looked ordinary, but linked to the orb artifact—nicknamed the 'Turtle Egg'—it couldn't be faked or damaged. Of course, it just qualified her for guild quests; no good as ID in cities or castles.
“The trait glitched, so I assigned a provisional rank. And we know your skill, Hero, but policy is policy—please forgive the Bronze rank.”
The guild bases rank on achievements, not raw power. They value trust over strength. Power proves itself surviving missions anyway. The Hero accepted the bronze badge without complaint.
Whew, eventful, but the guild drama wrapped up decently. One thing still bugged me, though.
Hold up.
“Yes? Any other business...?”
Think about it—I've been sealed decades. How'd you recognize me right away?
Valid question. Even in wuxia tales, extras yelling “Wait, that's the Heaven-Slaying Sword Art lost three hundred years ago!” turn out to be secret baddies. Gotta figure out where these absurd rumors come from.
But Kale looked baffled instead.
“How could we not know? What other sword wails with restless spirits and oozes such ominous aura that just touching it'd curse you—besides Lord Carbalt?”
Ah. Got lost in thought and forgot to turn off my effects. With so many souls packed in, they leak if I'm not careful.
So... if that sword had just managed itself better, none of this would've happened?
Is that how it is?
That damn sword for real!
Haha, sorry sorry. Everyone slips up sometimes, right?
Whatever, deal with it.
Gods of Sun, Moon, and Star, please smite that sword with heavenly punishment.
With the Holy Sword's lament, we left the office. Adventure time starts now! As I hummed excitedly, her prayer turned to a scream.
Please!