Not a Legend, But Legend Grade
“Halt!”
The moment we emerged from the dungeon, knights' swords and soldiers' arrows trained on us. The adventurers gulped amid the tense, murderous atmosphere. A powder keg ready to blow at any second. Only the Hero and the leader kept straight faces through it all.
“What's the meaning of this?”
“We've received an anonymous tip that the Dark Cult's base is here.”
An anonymous tip? They mobilized the knights in the dead of night on some nobody's word? Stinks to high heaven. I eyed the lead knight. Silver sword emblem. That marked the Silver Sword Knights, guardians of Tefer, the neighboring territory to Hire.
“Who are you to wander these mountains at night? No monsters worth an adventurer's time lurk here.”
“May I explain?”
The Hero nodded casually, and the leader approached the knight with a ingratiating smile, pulling him aside for a quiet word. Not quiet enough for us to miss, though. He recounted everything from the dungeon: the monster, the Dark Cult leader, the brutal fight.
“That one's the Hero? Hah. Ridiculous...”
“And take a look at this.”
The knight started skeptical, but when the leader pulled something from his pocket, his demeanor flipped in an instant. Palm-sized, whatever it was. Our senses are sharp, but no X-ray vision—we couldn't make it out. Hypnosis app or what?
“Heh heh, if honest adventurers say so, it must be true.”
What sorcery flipped this stickler on a dime? I itched to yank it from the leader's pocket, but the Hero had other priorities. While the leader chatted up the knight, she sidled over to the ranger and tapped his shoulder.
“Eek! W-what is it?”
Caught off-guard, the ranger yelped like he'd seen the grim reaper, then lowered his voice under glares from the soldiers and his crew. The Hero held out her pale palm.
“Hand it over.”
“Pardon? Hand over what?”
“Scroll.”
She meant the appraisal scroll from the dungeon. Peeking at the world's records required special clearance—even the almighty Hero couldn't wield it freely. Hell, casually peeking at status windows like me was cheat-level nonsense to begin with. Talk about a sweet deal from my isekai drop-in.
“Th-that's expensive...”
“More than, your life?”
“Here you go.”
[Hero...]
As the Hero straight-up extorted him and the holy sword sighed, the ranger reluctantly offered the scroll bundle, face twisted in agony. She plucked one out.
“This'll, do.”
“Thank you!”
Robbing him blind and getting thanks? Hero's negotiation game was next-level—even I'd applaud.
But what for? She shook out the crumpled scroll, then held it right up to me.
[Huh?]
“Legend, item. Curious.”
I am a legend item. Wait—no. I vibrated furiously in protest.
[Don't! Don't! Don't!]
“Why not?”
[Feels gross! Creepy!]
Appraisal my ass—it's identity theft. Doesn't work on living beings, but tough luck: I'm an item now, so it does.
[Use it on the holy sword instead!]
[Ah, sorry. Other Heroes tried too, but it never works on me.]
The holy sword chimed in with annoyingly chipper cheer. Bull. I see your status window crystal clear.
I was about to retort when—
[Falsenesssss!]
The Hero smothered further argument by slapping the scroll over me, rubbing it up and down. Even from her, it was disgustingly creepy! Like being tossed naked into a pervert parade, leered at by a thousand eyes licking my form.
[Defiled...]
I muttered in a daze as she unfolded the scroll and read the densely packed text aloud.
Cursed Sword: Carbalt
Grade: Legend
Deeper than night, darker than pitch-black—a blade reborn to its primordial form when a soul inhabited the god-flesh metal known as Solium. History's deadliest demonic sword, harvesting lives without regard for weak or strong alike. Sealed long in the Vatican Secret Vault for its peril, only to be unleashed by some fool's hand.
Functions: Consume stamina to maximize physical prowess • Manipulate flesh for advanced swordsmanship • Summon phantoms of the slain • Nullify instant-death evasion • ???
“Eek.”
For the first time, the Hero faltered at my naked stats.
“No, usable, abilities...”
Stop fact-checking me! She made me sound useless, but blame the owner. Can't pierce Hero blessings or resistances, so no stamina drain or body control. Phantoms? They'd melt in her holy power. Death evasion null is handy-ish, but against her strength, one dodge just means dying twice.
...Makes me look incompetent, but hey—Legend grade! Only one tier above me exists. Owner's fault, period.
“My, fault?”
[Hahaha, no. Of course not.]
Déjà vu much? She smirked and sheathed me at her hip. I heard the holy sword snicker, but damn it, I was wronged. Demonic swords are forbidden aces for the weak to smite the strong! No pathetic excuses from me, though.
[Piss off, you glowy bald blade that only chops and shines.]
[Retract that insult this instant!]
I didn't forget to smack down the cheeky holy sword either. As we bantered, the leader and knight wrapped up. He approached with an awkward grin.
“Convinced him for now. Hero came as porter, so we'll handle the request cleanup... Oh, and he shared some news.”
[What?]
“Hero's investiture ceremony's coming soon. Temple's searching for you.”
No way the Vatican openly antagonizes a three-god Hero—probably legit. I glanced at her.
[You haven't done the ceremony yet?]
[It's usually after they pick one...]
Ah, made sense per the holy sword. She'd trashed the Vatican post-holy sword grab and bolted—no time for formalities.
The investiture broadcast the new Hero worldwide, granting a title and rights. Normally post-training in combat, faith, etiquette, history—but she ain't the sit-still type, so they skipped it.
[It's important... What'll you do?]
[Of course attend! A sacred rite heralding new hope!]
[Didn't ask you.]
Temple wouldn't strike outright, but tails would follow. Lure her out on ceremony pretext, then shank her off the grid? Possible. Yet her face showed no worry.
“Gotta go.”
Casual as reclaiming her due.
*
“...Why'd you come to me?”
We didn't hit the nearest temple branch—instead, the adventurer guild chief's office. Poor middle-aged Kale, stuck late-night overtime, schooled his face as we barged in. Even as the Hero slammed the door, toppling paper towers, he snatched flying sheets with veteran reflexes—impressive poise.
“Investiture.”
“Pardon? Try the temple.”
Couldn't fully mask his grump—snappier than usual. I roared like a lion.
[Kid's clueless. When Hero speaks, you just say yes!]
“Yes???”
Interrupted mid-work and verbally curb-stomped, Kale gawked in disbelief. Tough luck—knights far, Hero near. Even with knights, no saving him from this disaster. He looked desk-bound, but rivaled top knights in skill.
“Even for the Hero... Never mind.”
Quick fold—nice. As I nodded approvingly, the Hero spoke in her flat monotone.
“And, request, completion.”
“Understood...”
Weakness is sin. Kale nodded soul-crushingly, no pushback against the abuse.
After settling via guild plate and handing it back, she shoved a fat something into his palm.
“Investiture, info, prep. Help.”
“Pardon? Why not the temple—”
“Fee.”
A hefty coin pouch—jingling with gold and plenty silver!
[Where'd you get that cash?]
“Shh.”
She silenced my shock with a menacing gesture, then bantered leisurely with Kale.
“Guild doesn't usually take these, but fine.”
“Don't wanna, see temple.”
“Yes. I'll bridge it.”
Hero's sharper than she lets on; Kale's seen every weirdo as branch chief. Talk zipped: her terse points, his spot-on expansions.
“Handled. But why not temple...”
She tapped my hilt. Green light.
[Jump when told, punk!]
“...Yes.”
My psychic boom fully toppled the paper tower amid snowing sheets. Kale nodded limply in the flurry.
All sorted, we headed back. Kale'd pull an all-nighter thanks to us— not my problem. She reinforced my seal, then slept peacefully. Gazing at her angelic sleeping face, I grumbled wistfully.
[...No more running now.]
Tried loosening the seal en route—nearly got holy-steamed. Not trusted hurts. But I'd briefly nulled it in the dungeon. Tough now, no third chance. Still... hope glimmered faintly.