A Flat Refusal
We had ventured into the Great Forest to save the dark elves and the World Tree, annihilated a barbarian tribe out in the Wasteland, and returned to the Duke's Castle, where we ultimately brought down a Demon King. It was a journey that could be considered long, or perhaps brief, depending on how one looked at it.
That an imperial daughter of such exalted standing—the Third Imperial Princess, who enjoyed exceptionally privileged treatment even within the imperial household—had been permitted to join such an expedition was fundamentally thanks to the Emperor's consent.
The problem lay in the words Arpe had spun to secure that permission.
"So... you told her that I'm the Hero, or an avatar equivalent to one? And that the Holy Church—no, the Goddess herself—personally certified it?"
"...Yes."
...Fine. Making a massive concession, let's say that much was harmless enough.
"And then, on top of that, you told her I'm your husband-to-be?"
"Yes, exactly. I told her you were a man so great and noble that I had to personally display my sincerity and foster intimacy with you."
"...And the Emperor actually believed a baseless tale you pulled out of thin air?"
"What do you mean, 'baseless'? Please don't underestimate the imperial information network—or rather, Her Majesty's omniscience. Even back then, Her Majesty already knew you were the paramount contributor who saved the Duke's Castle, that the Saintess was staying there specifically to be by your side, and that you possessed some suspicious knack for knowing everything without lifting a finger. Even taking all that into account, given how effortlessly her permission was granted, she likely knew a great deal more besides."
"..."
Well, if it was the Emperor, she had probably known long ago that I had clashed with Rubias and that my left arm had suffered demonic mutation. She was someone who wielded that caliber of transcendent authority, after all.
Besides, she hadn't exactly cast the girl out alone. Nazareth Nemeth had been at the Third Imperial Princess's side the entire time. Since dispatching an escort stronger than a Sword Master was practically impossible, calling that the utmost guard was hardly an exaggeration.
I could wrap my head around that part, but understanding was one thing; agreeing that the Emperor was 'omniscient' was something I flatly refused to do.
"Omniscient, my ass... That woman isn't nearly as impressive as you think."
"..."
At my blunt remark, the Third Imperial Princess's eyes narrowed, and her cheeks puffed out into a petulant pout.
"Ha, what's with that look? Siding with her just because she's your mother?"
"Of course I am! Besides, she isn't just anyone, she's the Emperor! And the person you're speaking to is an Imperial Princess! Anyone in their right mind would never utter such words in front of me!"
"Well, well. Now you're calling me a lunatic."
"Wh-when did I ever say that?! I never meant it like—"
"All right, all right, I'm kidding. In any case, because I went and actually killed a Demon King this time around, it basically proved your claims true, didn't it?"
"...Yes."
"Phew..."
The Emperor had her eyes on me... Having no clue what troubles this might invite or what consequences it would breed gave me a throbbing headache.
"...Sigh, forget it."
After brooding over it for a while, I realized agonizing was entirely pointless and let out a long breath. I had a rough guess as to how things might play out, but I couldn't be certain of anything. Well, the Emperor had a habit of flying off the handle, so perhaps I just needed to brace for that. Probably.
"So, Arpe. Did you come all this way just to tell me that?"
"Pardon? Ah, th-that's not all... I wanted us to get our stories straight."
"Get our stories straight? About what?"
"Don't tell me you're feigning ignorance? I literally just told you. Regarding our marriage, of course."
"...You were being serious about that? Wasn't it just an excuse to travel together?"
"Why wouldn't I be serious? In the first place, you belong to me, so marriage is practically nothing more than a trivial formality anyway, isn't it?"
"I don't belong to you, and I have zero intention of marrying you."
"Pardon? Why?"
Her eyes went wide with sheer, uncomprehending shock. The unmistakable whiff of madness radiating off her was downright terrifying. This girl was perfectly normal on ordinary days, but whenever anything touched upon her 'possessions,' she underwent a radical transformation.
"Kids are outside my strike zone. And besides..."
I clamped my mouth shut before the rest could slip out.
Setting everything else aside, if the Third Imperial Princess—a default heroine—ended up tethered to someone other than the protagonist, the plot would become a massive headache. Quietly partying up with the protagonist and slaying the Evil God was, by a mile, the best-case scenario for me.
"And besides? What is it?"
"No, forget it... Anyway, marriage between us is completely off the table, so get that through your head."
"Ugh...! This is humiliating! Humiliating, but... at-at least coordinate your story with mine! My reputation and the dignity of the imperial family are at stake! I took the initiative to seduce you entirely on my own, so if I return with nothing to show for it, do you know how much people will mock me?!"
"Ah, what a pain... Barely anyone even knows about it in the first place. Just let it slide. Besides, lies don't work on that woman anyway."
"By 'that woman,' do you mean Her Majesty...?! Please watch your tongue! You're frightening even me!"
"Yeah, yeah. Understood."
"Haah... honestly... Still, you really do know her well. That's true. Lies don't work on Her Majesty. But returning completely empty-handed is simply unacceptable... So how about we tell her we're engaged instead?"
"As if. I have no intention of doing that either, so if you're done talking, get out."
"...What? Aren't you being far too heartless?"
"I'm saying this because I want to rest."
"You've already rested plenty!"
"Well, you see, the thing is... I haven't rested at all."
Attending to seven women back-to-back was undeniably blissful and delightful, but it was just as grueling. If I hadn't absorbed Kubel's divinity and authority beforehand, my body would have never held out.
"Eeeek...!"
Arpe glared daggers at me, her platinum-gold eyes burning with indignation.
"I'm not leaving! Not until you grant my request! Or apologize!"
"...I told you, I want to rest."
"I don't care! Rest however you please! I won't listen to someone who lacks even the barest shred of courtesy toward royalty!"
"...Fine, do whatever you want."
Ordering Muriel to drag her out felt a bit heavy-handed, so I slumped back onto the couch with a defeated sigh and uncorked a bottle of liquor.
"..."
Standing at attention behind Arpe, Nemeth looked deeply conflicted. But when I flashed a cheeky grin and waved my hand, she gave in with a helpless sigh.
"Ah, let me pour you a drink~"
"Then I'll handle the snacks! Hehe~"
Just then, Rebecca and Pashtra, having keenly read the room, slunk forward to claim the spots on either side of me. Flouting decorum like this right before an imperial princess was an unforgivable breach of etiquette, but Arpe didn't seem to care in the slightest.
"...Hmph!"
Arpe let out a conspicuously loud snort, demanding my attention as she shot an icy glare my way. But when I paid her no mind and simply knocked back my cup, her scowl grew progressively darker.
"Pffft... Arpe. Glaring at me like that won't get you what you want. Sure, I can offer an apology for being rude... but give up on that engagement and marriage nonsense."
"..."
I gave a light shrug at her silent protest, chewed on the fruit snack Pashtra fed me, and stared blankly at the ceiling.
BAM!
Just then, someone kicked open the door without bothering to knock.
"Ah! Arpe! There you are!"
Bursting in with a loud cry was Cecilia, flanked closely by her escort, Wendy. The moment she spotted Arpe, she trotted over and plopped down right beside her. Despite appearances, she was a Saintess who must have received strict schooling in aristocratic manners, yet here she was acting so casual... I suppose it was proof of how close the two had grown.
"How could you leave me all alone? I was bored out of my mind! ...Huh? Arpe, what's with that face? Did something happen?"
Noticing Arpe's sullen look, Cecilia turned her gaze toward me with blatant suspicion, before barking in absolute certainty:
"Sir Hangil! You bullied Arpe again, didn't you?!"
"Who's bullying whom? Strictly speaking, I'm the victim here."
Considering she was practically trying to strong-arm me into an engagement and marriage, it was nothing but the honest truth.
"And don't say it like that—you make it sound like I bully people around the clock. When have I ever done that?"
"You do it every day! Whenever you're bored, you tease! You pull pranks! You tell lies! Have you already forgotten your own behavior?!"
"...Did I?"
At my question, Rebecca and Pashtra beside me, along with Muriel behind the sofa, offered wry smiles and nodded.
"Well... um... you kind of did...?"
"You rarely do it after changing bodies~ but before the swap, you were always like that, maybe because of the alcohol~"
"I was under the impression it was Master Hangil's hobby. Was it not?"
"..."
With my own retinue backing her up, I didn't have a leg to stand on.
"...Fine, fine. I bullied people. So what? You got a problem with that?"
"Wh-what?! How can you say that so shamelessly?! You're not even human!"
"Oh... that might actually be true."
The divinity and authority of the Beast God Kubel, the status of the World Tree, not to mention the Demon King's blessing from Rubias and a demonized left arm. From an objective standpoint, calling me human was indeed a bit of a stretch.
"Honestly...! Apologize to Arpe right this instant!"
"I'm sooorry~"
"Eeeek!"
Just as Cecilia's face flushed red and she opened her mouth to yell, the door swung open once again. Naturally, without a knock.
"Dear Brother! Oh? Arpe and Cecilia are here too? What are you all up to?"
The one who strode into the room was a sweat-drenched Vivian, trailed closely by Cacciola and Latipi.
"You're back earlier than expected. Training's already over?"
"Yes! Honestly, I wanted to keep going, but Big Sister Cacciola and Big Sister Latipi told me not to overdo it, so we wrapped it up for the day!"
"Is that so..."
Ever since the battle with the Demon King, Vivian's hunger for strength had grown even more intense—to the point where she came knocking early every morning, begging for personal instruction. In my weakened state, I couldn't help her train anyway, and it was a royal hassle to boot, so I had dumped the chore onto Cacciola and Latipi. It seemed they were finally done.
"Good work, you two. You went through a lot."
At my words, Cacciola glared at me playfully.
"Hmph. Having fun slacking off all by yourself, Master-ya?"
"Yep. Having a blast."
"Ugh, you really are disgustingly obnoxious...!"
Ignoring her as she pinched my cheek, I patted Latipi, whose eyes were practically sparkling with devotion.
"Ehehe... Receiving praise from Lord Hangil brings me boundless joy!"
"Right, right... But you guys smell like sweat. Go get washed up."
"Ah! Yes! Right away!"
"Sigh..."
"I'll be right back after a quick bath, Dear Brother!"
Watching Vivian march straight into my bathroom, I tilted my head.
Why are you heading into my bathroom, Vivian? You have one in your own room. The maids attending to you are over there, too.
"...Well, whatever."
Since it didn't really matter, I resumed sipping my drink, only to receive twin death glares from Arpe and Cecilia.
"Haah, fine, fine. I was in the wrong. What do I have to do to appease you two?"
"Why, obviously—!"
"If Sir Hangil gets engaged to me."
"...Eeeeeek?!"
Cecilia, who was mid-shout at me, whipped her head toward Arpe with terrifying speed.
Is her neck going to be okay?
Her jaw hit the floor and her eyes threatened to pop out of her skull in absolute shock, making for quite the spectacle.