First Kiss
"R-Really... i-is it okay...?"
"Y-Yes... p-please do it..."
I turned my body again and slowly walked toward Ha-eun.
Ah... I'm gonna lose my mind...
These few steps toward her felt endlessly long.
In truth, I'd only agonized over how to bring it up—I hadn't given a single thought to the actual process of kissing.
But I couldn't exactly say something insane like, 'On second thought, we're not even dating, so maybe a kiss is going too far?'
If I hesitate here, it'll just make Ha-eun even more awkward.
I steeled myself. Then I strode toward her like a man.
And declared it confidently.
"S-So... c-can we... s-start...?"
A nod.
Even with her head bowed, I could tell she nodded. After that utterly manly line dripping with effort,
I lifted my head. Very, very slowly.
And for the first time, her lips came into view.
Her lips are so small... insanely cute...
Seeing those small, pursed lips made my heart start pounding like mad.
Thump thump thump thump.
It was similar to the erratic beats from anxiety or shock, but somehow different. Unlike back then, when my eyes welled up with tears and all I wanted was to run away.
What the hell is this feeling...?
But I had no time for idle thoughts.
I closed my eyes and slowly moved my head forward. And finally.
Our lips touched.
"Eep..."
I felt Ha-eun flinch through her lips.
So soft... so this is what a girl's lips feel like...
There was no deeper connection beyond the simple press of lips. Of course not—we weren't embracing. Not even the light touch friends might share.
Just leaning in and touching lips.
Yet for some reason, this moment felt utterly blissful.
The soft texture of Ha-eun's lips, the quiet rhythm of her breathing.
And then.
Really, can't do a damn thing with this dumbass...
Phew... is it over...?
My heart felt like it was going to explode—it was brutal.
It should be complete now... huh?
But I'd forgotten. The gacha system always pulled some shit outside my expectations.
Is that a kiss? That's a freaking peck!!
Hurry up and shove your tongue in there!!!
This crazy bastard, what the fuck. Seriously!!
But I'd come this far—I couldn't back down now. I stopped hesitating.
I gently placed one hand on the back of her neck. And then.
"Ah-mmph...?"
I slipped my tongue between Ha-eun's small lips. Very carefully. Very softly.
This is... Ha-eun's... I'm really kissing her...
The tip of my tongue touched something moist and jelly-like—her tongue. The moment they met, it slid away, then our tongues softly intertwined.
Unlike her trembling lips tense with nerves, the warmth wrapping around mine was scorching hot and impossibly soft. This clumsy, sweet sensation I'd never felt before made my whole body melt.
Her sweet breath, once hesitant and flinching, now filled my mouth completely. Our pounding heartbeats transmitted perfectly through our touching lips.
And then.
Mana Amplification applied to Park Ha-eun.
Finally done...
I slowly pulled my lips away. A transparent thread connected our mouths.
I lowered my head again and spoke to Ha-eun.
"I-It's... d-done... I think..."
"Y-Yes, y-yes...!"
Ha-eun fell silent for a long while. So did I—we had nothing to say.
And it was Ha-eun who finally broke the silence.
"S-Sunbae...?"
"Yeah...?"
"I-I... r-right now... h-here... here..."
What? What's wrong?
"W-What's up?"
"M-My lower belly... w-what's it called... oh, right! U-Uterus! My uterus is hot!"
"N-No... m-maybe it's your dantian...?"
"Y-Yes! That's it! It feels like mana is settling in!!"
Thank god. It worked properly. Just like when my stamina increased and warmth spread through my veins, it seemed mana growth heated up the dantian.
"Then... try meditating right now and control the mana properly."
"Y-Yes!!"
Ha-eun quickly pulled out a chair, sat down, and began meditating. With this massive mana boost for the first time, she'd need mana breathing to adapt. It probably wouldn't take long.
Sigh... I'll just head out first...
I left her focused on meditation and slipped out of the classroom alone. Honestly, after the kiss, things felt awkward and uncomfortable...
On my way home alone.
Suddenly, a system alert rang out.
"Fuck..."
I know. I fucking know! But I already did it—what do you want me to do now!
This thing is seriously pissing me off...
But the gacha system had this tsundere side, teasing me like that but always slipping me good rewards through achievements. Despite the bullshit, I tapped details with some expectation.
"You fucking bitch!!!!"
There were limits to screwing with people. I was already a mess.
"Ha... seriously..."
Did I fuck up?
Coldly speaking, I took a massive L. I handed over a desperately needed ability, and all I got was one kiss. Plus, I bawled like an idiot in front of Ha-eun...
Though for 'just' a kiss, it felt fucking amazing...
Even factoring that in, the cost-benefit was way off. Sure, life wasn't all calculations, but...
Regret it? Ha... honestly, I don't know.
I trudged onward, and then another system alert.
Hmm. This thing had a real talent for getting under my skin.
I tapped details without much thought—and my eyes went wide.
Park Ha-eun thought, once she got home.
My mana really increased a ton... Sunbae wasn't lying after all...
No matter how hard she tried, her mana never grew.
Truth be told, she'd half-given up. She figured the hunter path just wasn't for her. She couldn't drop out, so she just kept attending.
But Ji-min solved that worry so effortlessly.
With this... I can do well in the first-year rank battles too...
It was a miracle. She never imagined an ability to boost someone else's mana existed.
But then, belatedly, she realized.
This mana-boosting power had to be insanely valuable. And what he'd said to her.
'Mana is something I desperately need too. But I hate seeing you struggle more.'
'If I don't give it to you, I'll have to use it myself.'
Now Park Ha-eun fully understood those words.
Boosting mana was a one-time-only chance. And Ji-min had simply given her that precious opportunity he'd planned to use himself.
Sunbae gave something that valuable to me...
Ji-min was enduring hellish academy life. Ha-eun knew that well, which was why she'd wanted to look after him out of pity.
Yet he'd handed her this incredible chance. She couldn't imagine how much he'd agonized over it.
Ah... no...
And in the midst of it, she'd doubted his intentions. Wondered if he was just using her to satisfy his lust... She'd even said that crap out loud.
Forcing him to voice his painful situation and the rumors himself.
Instead of thanking her senior for such a gracious decision, she'd ripped open his wounds and suspected him.
"S-Sorry... Sunbae..."
Ha-eun buried her face in her knees and began sobbing. She wanted to take back her words and expressions from before, but it was impossible.
She regretted it so much. She felt like dying of guilt.
And she'd even missed the chance to say thanks. By the time her meditation ended, Ji-min was gone.
Another thought filling her mind.
Did... Sunbae not want to kiss me...?
Thinking back to that moment made her face flush red. Her tension at the first lip touch. The flinch when his tongue suddenly entered.
It was my first kiss...
After her first kiss, her feelings toward Ji-min shifted a bit. She couldn't quite put it into words yet.
Anyway, her first kiss wasn't as bad as she'd feared.
Yeah. Actually felt pretty good.
The next day.
The same old routine.
The cadets' snickers as I opened the classroom door in the morning. Me pretending not to hear a thing.
Just another identical day. And lunchtime, as always.
I entered the cafeteria about 20 minutes late, as usual. Sat alone in my corner spot and started my lonely meal.
No alert yet, so probably not tomorrow...
Rank battle schedules and opponents came a day before. No notice yet meant Thursday or Friday, likely.
As I began eating.
Someone sat across from me.
Clack—
The sound of a tray hitting the table. Then a voice reaching my bowed head.
"S-Sunbae..."
It was Ha-eun.
"S-Sorry... f-for doubting you... really..."
"It's fine. Totally understandable. Mana settling in okay?"
"Y-Yes... I'm really... sorry... y-you did so much for me..."
"No need to apologize. Honestly, I loved it... no, I mean, I'm thrilled your mana increased. That's what I meant."
Ah. The kiss was great. Fucking amazing.
"Sunbae."
"Yeah?"
Suddenly, Ha-eun without a stutter.
"L-Look... at me."
"What?"
What did she mean?
"Look into my eyes."
"......"
Why? Because she wasn't stuttering?
I did something I'd never do normally.
I slowly raised my head.
Ha-eun's tray came into view. Her small hands and slender arms. Her long brown hair cascading to her chest. Her delicate neckline. Her lips... the ones I'd kissed.
And finally, our eyes met.
"Sunbae. Thank you so much. I'll repay this favor, I swear."
Ha-eun's eyes, glistening with tears at the corners. But her smile was bright.
The moment I truly took in her pretty face.
"Ah......"
It was like a pure light emanated from her.
An unbelievably warm light. One that made people happy.
And somehow.
That light seemed to warmly illuminate my tattered heart, scarred by too many wounds. It felt like the holes inside me were filling, even if just a little.
Regret giving her the mana amplification?
Not a single bit.