The Bug and the Shepherd Girl

The door burst open.

"Emergency!"

I was ripped from a deep, long-overdue sleep and dragged back into reality in an instant. The hand clamped around the nape of my neck belonged, of course, to the Demon King.

"W-wh... what's going on..."

If you'd been my junior in the army, you'd be dead.

The Demon King's idea of a wake-up call was kindness itself. It stood in perfect contrast to Private Park, who used to rouse people as if he were gently stroking the fine hairs of a sleeping lion.

"It's a disaster... a disaster."

The Demon King had gone ashen, flapping about in a panic.

...It's ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠probably nothing anyway. It's not like this is my first day living with her.

She'd lost the mayonnaise lid again, or the Paper Crane wasn't eating. Some ridiculous reason like that.

I wrapped the blanket tighter around myself, and she snatched it away with a yank. The cold that had been lurking in every corner of the room coiled around my body in an instant.

"Ughghgh... brr."

This bitch! A Demon King with neither blood nor tears, presently in progress! There are things you do to a person and things you don't! May she spend her twilight years dying in agony from arthritis and toothache!

"I said it's a disaster. This is important to you too, since you swore you'd live here with me forever."

Don't sneak in some bullshit promise I never even made.

"What's going on... did you lose the mayonnaise lid again?"

"It's as big a deal as that!"

So it's nothing, then.

"There's a cockroach!"

I shot upright from my huddle.

"Holy shit! That IS a huge deal!"

Anyone who has ever lived through the terror of a cockroach will understand. That slick, glossy, lightning-fast, cunning little beast of pitch-black—the knowledge that it is sharing the same air, the same oxygen, in the same space as you. The certainty that the moment you so much as hold your breath, those quicksilver legs will be scuttling through every corner of the room.

And worse than anything....

The possibility that it isn't just the one.

"...I can't do this."

Magic circles unfurled at the Demon King's feet once more. Orange light, violet light, black light—circles of every color and pattern wrapped themselves around her.

"Oh. Don't tell me you've got a spell for hunting down and wiping out cockroaches?"

"No. I'm putting a bug-repellent buff on myself. Nothing's getting within ten meters of me."

"Can you use that on me too?"

"It's for one person."

...You cheapskate! ...You cheapskate!

All that talk about being partners, and the second a cockroach appeared, camaraderie went straight out the window.

A memory from elementary school flickered through my mind. Hyungseop, from the class next door.

Heh... that little bastard.

Either way, I had no choice but to adopt Hyungseop's method. Namely, dragging the Demon King down into this hell with me.

"Cockroaches love girls' rooms."

"...Doesn't matter. I'll just keep the buff—"

"You're not going to be sitting in your room twenty-four seven with that buff on. When you're gone, the cockroach'll crawl through every corner of your room. And it'll lay eggs in the corners, along the walls, under the bed."

"....E-eggs??"

"Yeah. Once a cockroach starts laying eggs..."

"...Starts?"

I arranged my face into a look of genuine suffering, bit down hard on my lower lip, and spoke.

"Hundreds—no, thousands of babies will be hiding in every corner of your room. And they'll be watching, waiting for you to leave. With those pitch-black, glittering little eyes."

"Eek!"

Even I thought the description was skin-crawling. She clutched her pale, goosebumped arms to her chest and recoiled in horror.

"...Th-this is bad. What do we do?"

"Let's go to the first place you saw it."

"O-okay..."

"Here?"

The Demon King pointed at the kitchen sink. She cleaned often enough, but cockroaches, it seemed, appeared anyway.

Persistent little bastards...

The devotion it took to come all the way above the clouds was no joke.

"The m-moment our eyes met... it hid behind that box over there."

"Right. So what do you keep doing?"

She had a grip on my shoulder and was shoving me steadily toward the box, her face a portrait of utter irresponsibility as she pushed without a shred of mercy.

"Time for you to earn your keep. That's an order from the landlord. Catch it."

".....And if I can't?"

"Then ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠I'll be too scared of cockroaches to ever set foot in the kitchen again. And since you can't leave this place, you'll starve to death. Then you'll have to find a cockroach and eat it, you know?"

...

She was a demon. The kind who steals a sleeping person's blanket and threatens them with food. A demon of one hundred percent purity. I repent. For not killing her the other day.

Was she just going to use me however she liked, like a crooked adoptive parent who pockets the subsidy and gives the kid right back?

She was the one who locked me up in the first place, for fuck's sake.

"Come on, hurry!"

My eyes drifted to the far side of the box. In that shadow, countless cockroaches might already be waiting, their legs trembling with anticipation.

...

.....I really can't do this.

I suffer from an illness of unknown cause that even modern medicine cannot identify, whereby I foam at the mouth and faint the moment my eyes meet a cockroach's. Kicking the Demon King in the ass might actually have been the safer option.

...There was no other way now.

Will this even work?

I had only recently confirmed that she had a heart. A half-measure of a human heart, or whatever it was. It was worth a shot.

"....Hhck..."

"....Huh?"

I crouched down and buried my face between my knees.

"...Hic... hhck... hh-hhck..."

"Oh my god, what's wrong with you?!"

She sounded as alarmed as if she'd just watched a pet dog swallow a chicken bone.

"...Hhk.. it's nothing. Go away. Leave me alone."

"Why, why are you like this? Hey? Hey?"

"I'm fine... if I just stay like this for a bit I'll be fine... hhck..."

"What's wrong? Hey? Why are you like this? Hey? Hey?"

The Demon King circled my crouched form, whining like a puppy that needed to pee. Good. It was working. This hopelessly naive girl.

"...W-what is it? Is it because I told you to catch the cockroach?"

Game over.

"...Hic... the truth is..."

I fed her a reasonably convincing load of nonsense. I'd had a brother, I told her. When we were little, he'd died protecting me from a monstrous cockroach. That was why I had such a vicious trauma about them. Something along those lines.

"...Oh, heavens. I had no idea."

She clapped a hand over her mouth and patted my back.

"Hhck... no. Cockroaches are... I... I... cough!urk!"

I trembled and dry-heaved, sprawled across the floor, and she held me back.

"What! What are you saying! I'll handle things here somehow. You go rest."

".....Could I ask that of you?"

"O-of course."

Alright. You're the exterminator now.

With trembling hands, she took hold of the wooden box. Then she started to pull.

Ugh.

I didn't even want to look. I watched from a generous distance, terrified that a cockroach might suddenly burst out and land on me.

"Nngh.... hup!"

The Demon King, who could probably jump rope with a brachiosaurus's neck, yanked the box clean off the floor.

...

I turned my averted gaze back toward it.

....What. There's nothing there?

The Demon King's eyes and mine met, both gone round. Relief and the terror of not knowing where the cockroach had gone lived side by side in that look.

"...It's gone."

"Yeah."

"...Hey."

The Demon King gestured at me.

"Since I already lifted it, you clean here. It's been a while."

...That much I could do.

"...Alright. But what's the plan for the cockroach?"

"It's hiding somewhere... we'll have to check everything one by one. Can't just live with it."

I agreed. Leaving a cockroach you'd already laid ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠eyes on was no different from living with a fishbone stuck in your throat.

"...Let's clean first, then check the other places."

Hmm?

"Hnnngh."

That made seven. Underneath the piece of furniture the Demon King had just lifted, there was once again no cockroach.

"Where on earth did it go."

She pondered, brow furrowed.

The truth was, I had already put the cockroach on the back burner. I was too busy locked in a silent battle of wits with her.

...No way... wait. Yes. That's it. Because.

"Clean here first, then let's lift that one next."

The fragments of the deduction were starting to fit. I, who had observed her more than anyone and watched her from right beside her, could tell.

She was satisfied right now.

Think about it. It was strange.

You, who used to dodge Yuria's Divine Archer shots, missed a cockroach? A woman who takes down flying flies with Chain Lightning?

...

That was it. There had never been a cockroach to begin with.

The reason she woke me. The reason for all that over-the-top panicking and acting.

It was to move the furniture and make me clean every inch of the place.

I got played.

She had predicted that I would use my wits to wriggle out of cockroach-catching duty. Which meant that by taking on the (nonexistent) job of catching the cockroach herself, she gained a perfectly legitimate reason to dump her "minor request"—the cleaning—on me.

How far—just how far ahead had she seen?

With a heave, the Demon King lifted another piece of furniture.

"None here either."

That look of pristine, know-nothing innocence on her face, and right behind it a viper's tongue flickering. Once I realized I had been dancing on her palm ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠from the very start, the cockroach wasn't what scared me.

"Do this one too. Clean."

"...Will do."

This girl was definitely not stupid. She was the strategist type.

Sure, she was strong on a whole other level, but you don't sit at the apex of demonkind on power alone. I had underestimated the monarch of an entire race.

"Let's stop here and eat."

...Shameless. What happened to being too scared of cockroaches to ever set foot in the kitchen...

"The cockroach?"

"Hmm. Who knows... wonder where it flew off to. If I see it I'll catch it myself. Kihihit! Hihit!"

She grinned like a little rascal. It was, unmistakably, a victor's smile. Vicious girl.

"Thanks for the meal. I'm going to bed."

"Kay. See you tomorrow."

Today, as always, I had been subjected to her games from morning till night before finally being granted permission to clock out.

Thump, thump went my feet. The door creaked.

I came back to my room and threw myself onto the bed at once.

I worked so hard today, I'll fall asleep in no—

The door burst open.

"I-it's a disaster!!!"

"....What now?"

"A cockroach... there's a cockroach in my room!"

...

Who did she think was going to fall for that? Besides, there was what she'd said with her own mouth earlier.

"S-save me..."

"You."

"...."

"You said earlier if it showed up again, you'd catch it yourself. You did."

I said that and pulled the blanket over my head. The Demon King, who couldn't tell a lie and kept her own word to the letter, had no idea what to do.

"...H-hey, could I stay in this room tonight too..."

"It's for one person."

In the end, the shepherd girl who reaped what she sowed couldn't set foot in her own room for the rest of the night.

And all night long she wandered the dark Demon King's Castle with a scritch-scratch, scritch-scratch—just like a cockroach.