Drawing Quiz (2)

There are artists like that — the kind who withdraw from the world, stacking work in solitude, only to one day dump the whole pile on the public at once. Most of what they produce turns out to be a disaster. They've never gone through the process of honing a piece through exchange with other people, and art built facing a wall has every chance of growing in entirely the wrong direction.

The Demon King was like that.

What I'd taken for a bastard sword turned out to be a seagull. What I'd taken for a ladle turned out to be the Grim Reaper's scythe. What I'd taken for a direwolf turned out to be a can of beans.

"...You son of a...!"

She was furious. The artistic path she'd walked alone in this tower was being smashed to pieces in real time. I hadn't gotten a single one of the three drawings she'd been working on since the crack of dawn.

Urgh... what the hell am I supposed to do? Fuck!

They were god-awful. Unbelievably, unforgivably bad. If I sat my kindergarten-age cousin down in front of these, even she'd go, "How dare you show me this goddamn garbage!" and tear them to shreds.

This wasn't even about guessing my drawings anymore. Every last one of her painstakingly crafted masterpieces was about to become a scrap of toilet paper. I'd thought we might skate through this round without incident, but...

"Half left."

The Demon King tapped the hourglass, tick, tick, hounding me. If I missed this one too, she might transform into something that wasn't even a woman anymore. Worry took the lead.

Focus.

I tried to interpret the drawing she held up with both hands. A white box, and on top of it a pitch-black cylinder. From the cylinder, several black towers jutted upward.

...!!

I got it. I totally got it.

"The Black Demon's Land. Typhon."

I had a memory of going there with Nine during a boss raid.

That bitch...

Nine was the kind of woman who made my blood boil just thinking about her, context be damned. The reason she'd dragged me along even though she could've one-shot the thing herself: she needed someone to peel her peaches.

Still, this time you saved my ass.

Even if the memory was stained with complete bullshit, thanks to Nine I could guess this drawing...

"Wrong."

A thunderbolt slammed down on the crown of my head.

"...Wh-what? Then what is it?"

"It's a chocolate cake."

The Demon King's tone was so cold it could freeze over. This damn woman. What kind of cakes had she been stuffing her face with all this time?

She let out a long sigh, wearing the face of someone who had shouldered every last one of the world's sorrows by herself, and set the monstrosity she'd been insisting was a chocolate cake down on the floor.

I'm fucked. Anyone could see that was Typhon. What the hell.

Four misses in a row already. If this kept going...

Bang!

No!

I had to get this one. No matter what. But judging by the disasters so far, the odds of recognizing the next one were slim to none.

A little life returned to the Demon King's face as she looked at the next drawing she'd set on the floor.

"Oh, this is the second-best one I drew. You should be able to get this."

....

It sounded like a warning that if I missed this one too, she'd snap me like a biscuit.

What do I do? I can't find a way.

I had to narrow down a ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠reasonable answer from within her deranged artistic worldview.

...

Impossible.

A terrible hypothetical, but even if I lived with her for another ten years, I wouldn't recognize so much as a fragment of those grotesque drawings.

I can't find a method by looking at the pictures. Is there a gap somewhere else?

The Demon King was about to show me the fifth drawing. Once it started, it was over. I needed a method, fast...!

...

Ah.

Let's try it. Just fucking go for it.

"Hey."

The Demon King's hands, which had been lifting what she'd called a masterpiece, stopped dead.

"Hm?"

"That Paper Crane."

The origami crane hanging around her neck like a necklace.

"...What about it? Even if you ask, I'm not giving it back."

And with that, she stuffed it down into her dress, shooting me a wary look. I wouldn't take it even if you gave it to me. Keep it.

"That's not it. That thing — you've been putting buffs on it properly, right?"

"...What kind of nonsense is that."

"Didn't I tell you? That's a living object, so if you keep applying buffs periodically, the one year until it turns into a game cartridge gets a little shorter."

!!!

The anger faded a little from her expression. Curiosity took its place.

"...Really?"

"Have you ever seen me lie?"

I do it all the time.

Ahem, ahem. I cleared my throat and continued the bullshit with a perfectly serious face.

"When was the last time you buffed it?"

"Uuum... yesterday, right after I got it from you, so about twelve hours?"

"What? That long? This is... the flow of essence inside the Paper Crane might already be warped..."

"What?! Th-then what happens?"

I don't fucking know. I don't even know what I'm saying. This innocent Demon King asked back with the face of an elementary schooler holding a dying chick, even at this complete nonsense.

"Calm down. It's still fine. Hmm... first you should put Protection of Athena on it and then keep chaining buffs. That's the academic consensus for mana resonance."

This was also complete bullshit, of course. I didn't know. Not a thing about it. Protection of Athena — a buff that made the target gleam as though you'd dumped aluminum on it for a set period, and grotesquely inflated its defense and magic resistance.

"...But we're in the middle of a game... what do I do?"

"Of course the game is important too. Let's ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠do this. You pose the questions and apply the buffs at the same time. All remaining six questions. All at once. You can't apply buffs while you're the one guessing, right?"

"What? Then what about your turn?"

"We'll do mine after you've finished all ten of yours. The important thing is the Paper Crane. Right?"

"Yeah. That's true."

The Demon King hesitated. She swallowed.

By casting Protection of Athena on the Paper Crane, she signaled that she'd accepted what I said. A low hum of magic filled the air.

Yes!

Defense and magic resistance didn't matter in the slightest. The point was to make the Paper Crane shiny.

"Here, next drawing."

She showed me the picture. As expected, it was a monstrosity unrecognizable to the human eye.

The Demon King posed the quiz while simultaneously buffing the origami crane playing at being a necklace, and light coiled around it all over again.

...Let's see.

I tilted my head this way and that, observing the back of the drawing reflected in the gleaming Paper Crane.

...Cush...ion?

I thought it was Kriemhild's Shield...

With bright light wrapping around the glossy Paper Crane, it had naturally become a mirror. I was really glad I'd folded it from a large sheet of paper. The Demon King had been holding the drawings up to her chest this whole time, and since I was taller than her, looking down from this distance I could see the back of each picture through the crane.

Of ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠course, it wasn't a round mirror, so there was the inconvenience of having to piece the letters together from slightly different angles because of the curves. But I could sneak glances while she was chanting. That much was manageable.

To think it'd go this smoothly.

It was only possible because the Paper Crane meant so much to the Demon King. Her naivety played a part too, of course.

"It's a cushion. Anyone can see that. You really captured the fluffiness."

Getting the first of the drawings she'd been working on since dawn, the Demon King grinned so wide her mouth nearly split.

"Heheh, kihihihi! That's right!"

A laugh I'd normally want to shoot with a Desert Eagle. Right now it was a signal flare that the lie was working, so I was just glad to hear it.

"Alright, next question. Show me."

I got everything right up through the second-to-last question, Jörmungandr. I had no idea what Jörmungandr was, but damn did it look like shit.

"Alright. Now the last question."

"We're done."

...!

The radiance vanished from the Paper Crane. Protection of Athena was gone too, and now it was just paper.

"Al-already?"

"Yep. I put all forty-two on it."

The fact that she could apply forty-two disaster-grade buffs was impressive enough, but the high-speed chanting that let her slap them all on while posing just five quiz questions was astonishing.

The world's strongest Paper Crane...

No lie — even if my party ganged up on it for three days and nights, this thing wouldn't tear.

"Hehe... you're pretty good at this? How were my drawings?"

I didn't even need to look. It was a question with a predetermined answer. I praised her with some vaguely lyrical language, and she smiled as she picked up the last drawing.

...I should just stop at five.

The buffs... no, the radiance had cut off. There was ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠no way to guess the drawings now. Originally I'd planned for six, but at least five should keep me from getting chewed out. More than anything, the Demon King looked very satisfied right now.

"..."

"..."

"You're not going to show me?"

The Demon King, who'd picked up the last drawing, whipped it behind her back.

"I'll just count this one as correct. It's thanks for telling me about buffing the Paper Crane."

"...Alright."

I was a little curious, but it didn't really matter.

Back to my turn. Through desperate hint-giving, I barely managed to get her to guess seven. Six for me versus her — a satisfying match. No, a victory the Demon King seized, and she ended the game smiling more happily than anything.

And then dinnertime.

"Is this real?"

A groan slipped out of me out loud before I knew it.

Pork belly. Sizzling grilled pork belly was putting on a pretty little seduction. The visual put the reptile meat Nine used to brag about to shame — it wasn't even a comparison.

This is so fucking happy.

I think I get why arena gladiators who could die at any moment are always so cheerful. The reward that comes from walking the tightrope between life and death is that sweet.

"C-can I really eat this?"

I asked the Demon King carefully.

"Titan's Head, Protection of Demeter... Yep! Eat."

Still believing my earlier lie, the Demon King was still applying buffs. Like a hen sitting on her eggs, she was pouring every last nerve into the Paper Crane.

I swallowed, stabbed a piece with a fork, and carefully put the pork belly in my mouth. Hot steam scorched the roof of it.

Crunch. Chew, chew...

...

"The earth's vitality, Gaia's Blessing... Huh... huh?"

Confusion crossed the Demon King's face as she busily applied buffs.

"Are you crying?"

Drip, drip. It was so good I teared up. All those bitches who'd toyed with me over food. I'd always lied to myself in the face of their humiliation. I don't need meat. I wouldn't eat it even if you gave it to me.

...

"...Thanks for the meal."

I didn't care about the Demon King's stunned expression and stuffed the meat into my mouth. How many years had it been?

The meat, grilled not over charcoal but over hellfire, was too delicious. I ate so much I wondered if half a pig had gone into my stomach.

"I'm gonna go wash my face."

Saying it was something she'd been saving, the Demon King — who'd barely eaten a few pieces of meat — left the kitchen.

...I feel kinda grateful.

It's a stupid thing for a locked-up bastard to say, but what can you do. Before meat, all things are equal.

Clean up before she comes back and go to sleep.

The flow was good, so cleaning up fast and going to bed was the best move. I stacked the empty dishes.

"Huh? This is..."

The drawings the Demon King had made during the guessing game.

...The last question.

I was curious. The drawing the competitive Demon King had glossed over. What on earth was it? Unable to overcome my curiosity, I broke the unspoken rule of not touching the Demon King's things and flipped the drawing over.

And I found the one she hadn't used as a question.

...What.

A drawing just as grotesque as all the others. But it looked strangely familiar.

...Is it a person?

Curious about the answer, I looked at the back.