Chapter 50
-----------------------------------------------------------------
Translator: MadScientist
Chapter: 50
Chapter Title: Chapter 50
-----------------------------------------------------------------
```html
-----------------------------------------------------------------
Translator: MadScientist
Chapter: 50
Chapter Title: Zhuge Liang in Eastern Wu (5)
-----------------------------------------------------------------
Baselain felt as if he'd been possessed by a ghost.
"This... why is this fun...?"
There was no formula for writing a hit novel.
But there sure as hell was one for tanking a story.
For example.
Stuffing a single scene with a bunch of characters.
And not just any characters—filling it entirely with brand-new extras who had never appeared before.
Regular readers weren't kind to novels like that. They hadn't had enough time to immerse themselves in the characters.
So they'd go, "What the hell is this?" and toss it aside.
Another one.
Filling an entire chapter with nothing but dialogue, without even a single scene transition.
That might fly if it was the final boss Demon King showing up and engaging in philosophical discourse right before the ending.
But pull that crap in the early or mid-game, and readers would immediately cry "padding" and chuck it.
However.
This author had calmly committed both sins.
It was an atrocity that shouldn't exist—one that would've had the editors at the Imperial Daily charging out to slap the manuscript across the writer's face.
If it had been him, he'd have taken the hit, teared up, and revised it.
But what was now before his eyes...
Countless discourses with extras from the Wu kingdom he'd never seen before.
And they were packed to the brim with argumentative content that was pure catnip.
Had this Ulysses guy completely lost his touch?
...It would've been better if that were the case.
Zhuge Liang, ever since you joined Liu Bei, he's been on a losing streak without a single win. Doesn't that make you the jinx of defeat?
In this day and age, does wiping out 100,000 with just 1,000 at Baling still count as a loss? You couldn't pull that off, could you?
But you still lost, right?
You selfish prick—fine if all the people die? Protecting the people while retreating is what makes a true hero!
In the debate over what makes a hero.
Zhuge Liang crushed the opposition.
Cao Cao's army numbers over a million—can you even handle that?
If we say Cao Cao's forces are a million strong... how many are actually fit for battle? How did he even get this far? Knocking out Yuan Shao's army, Liu Biao's army, and leaving just a handful behind.
Why's the great Zhuge Liang running his mouth like this? Didn't you come here asking for help?
Don't gamble unless you're certain. Didn't you learn that? Surrendering to a phantom Cao Cao army out of fear?
In the debate over how to fend off the million-strong army.
Zhuge Liang crushed the opposition again.
And more besides.
Feels like Cao Cao has heaven's mandate on his side?
Bet you could betray your lord and brag about having heaven's mandate too?
Other than those big ears, no elven blood left in you? Weren't you originally just a mat maker?
The Emperor stamped the family seal himself? Heretic.
All you're doing is talking nonsense— what's your education like? Ever read a book?
Plan to read books until the kingdom falls? Life is about real combat. And how's your name Yan Jun?
It was a true one-man tongue army, stabbing each sharp tongue of Wu's top trash-talkers one by one—an unparalleled dance of verbal slaughter.
In the end.
No more of this pathetic trash talk! It's banned outright!
Huang Gai himself stepped in, unable to watch the Wu tigers getting verbally demolished, and ended up praising Zhuge Liang.
In a place devoid of even one friendly face, where everyone waited with knives in their tongues like a hellish arena.
Zhuge Liang swept them all with his three-inch tongue, emerging as the final victor.
"...Ha."
In that process, he contrasted the weak nobles pretending to fear foreign threats and pushing for surrender.
With the staunch generals ready for a last stand—subtly hinting that even as a strategist, he possessed the bearing of a general.
Baselain had no choice but to admit it.
It was a damn well-crafted episode.
"But after laying out a story like this, can he keep the momentum going? Must've been tough to write... This is probably it."
Still, Baselain remained skeptical.
He'd seen too many writers who tossed out "this'll be fun" novels haphazardly, then abandoned them without tying up the loose ends.
Ulysses would do the same...!
However, Kim Yul half-betrayed Baselain's expectations.
But it was more than enough to bring satisfied smiles to the lips of most readers.
It even succeeded in proving the protagonist's munchkin status to those who'd tilted their heads during the Three Visits arc, wondering "Is this really Zhuge Liang?"
But it didn't end there.
The foreign lord himself.
Despite the risk where one slip of the tongue could get his head chopped off and quick-delivered to Cao Cao.
Just surrender already? But you know Cao Cao's a married woman killer, right? Heard he wants a threesome set with your sister-in-law and Lady Zhou Yu—itcha itcha.
By igniting the flames of NTR in the hearts of men, he properly scratched Sun Quan—who hadn't yet awakened to his Scythian bloodline and devolved into a Jerry—and sealed the alliance.
"Hyah... romance and passion even here! Gotta ask for a Daqiao-Xiaoqiao side story later...!"
Roselin hit the like button on the bold attempt to go all-in for battle to protect his beloved woman, despite the overwhelmingly disadvantageous situation.
Against Zhou Yu's wariness, envy, and jealousy—sadly destined to scream "The heavens!" in this creation too.
100,000 arrows in three days flat. That's the creative economy.
He even pulled off the genius move of loading boats with straw bales to aggro massively, dodging while farming arrows.
If it had appeared in any other novel even once, fine.
But turning the enemy's forces into your own harvest? That outlandish idea was a world-first novelty here.
And so.
Victory in the debates.
Successfully convinced Sun Quan.
Triumphed over Zhou Yu in strategy too.
Far from dropping off, Ulysses' "The Greatest Genius Doesn't Hide His Loyalty" was trending ever upward.
"Squeeze a bit harder."
"Hmph, time to show you the true touch of an elf?"
Naturally, Novelpia's subscribers skyrocketed too.
As punishment for voicing the impudent question "This isn't brainrot, right?", Clio evolved into a massage shuttle.
But Kim Yul wasn't quite that happy.
The strategy...
Was wrong.
Getting scratched by that bastard back then and overcommitting to the Zhuge Liang arc wasn't bad.
The reactions were great, and card pack sales were surging daily as a spillover benefit.
Just release the Battle of Red Cliffs expansion pack and it'd be perfect...
The problem.
Was the Sima Yi arc.
Using a two-track writing method to enjoy halo effects wasn't bad, and it had some success.
"Kuhk..."
The status window doesn't lie.
Of all things...
Sima Yi's popularity was a pitiful handful, not even a third of Zhuge Liang's.
And Zhuge Liang's metrics were trending up.
Sima Yi's were trending down.
The gap could widen to four, five, even six times.
At this rate, it was a complete reversal of priorities.
Maybe early-wrap Sima Yi and pivot to another historical era.
That might be better. Writing two Three Kingdoms stories was already making his head hurt.
"But we're making a ton of money, aren't we?"
"Money can't buy soul, you tin can...!"
"But it can buy tasty stuff. Hehe."
"You piggish tin— Agh!"
Historie's counter-hit from the Historie stance slammed into his forearm.
This hurts a lot...!
"Chocolate provides immediate effects in stimulating brain activity, so I consume it to output better thinking. Refrain from such rude remarks."
Wipe that chocolate mess off your mouth first...
But if he sniped back here, their newly-learned "sulky" tin can would pout and bundle up in her clothes again.
So in his grand magnanimity, Kim Yul decided to endure.
"I just felt some unpleasant sensation."
"Must be your imagination."
Seems the cutting-edge AI even dabbled in mind-reading...
"Uh...?"
"Eh...?"
Historie and I let out dumb noises in unison.
Something was off with the lab door.
Normally, modern scenery that shouldn't exist would occasionally peek through the glass to stir nostalgia.
But now, it was like...
A gacha animation had exploded in golden flash.
And then.
Rumble rumble.
Rumble rumble...!
"Hooeh...! K-Kim Yul...? What's...?"
The tin can clung to my forearm, making the weirdest voice I'd ever heard from her.
I dunno either.
What the hell was happening?
Some super-fun hidden cam prank?
Like, tada! Doctoral degree completion surprise event! And out pops the advisor? Was I the cliché protagonist?
Even as my thoughts spun wildly, the soft pouch clinging to my arm helped keep my sanity intact.
Once more.
Rumble rumble, rumble rumble...!
The door shook violently.
Right after.
A pair of horns appeared.
Followed by a golden blond crown bursting through the glass.
Extremely round and...
The symbol of rebellion, and a head I knew all too well.
Forehead jutting out.
Vertical slit lizard pupils blinking.
Fangs growling, kiddo lips pouting.
"Ugh, what barrier is tougher than the spirit realm...!"
Esthea's eyes, growling in frustration.
Captured us plastered together, trembling wide-eyed.
And then.
Esthea shouted.
"Eek! Stop fooling around and link up, link up!"
"......"
"......"
The crazy brat had invaded the lab.
```