Caught Off Guard, Part 2
Someone was there. I lifted my head on reflex, and when I craned my neck, a figure swam into view—upside down. The reason they looked inverted was, quite obviously, because I was lying upside down myself.
Even so, was it really acceptable to just sprawl out in someone else's house?
Let me correct that. To be precise, I had been sitting in a chair with my body half-reclined, staring at the ceiling. Then, catching the presence of a stranger, I slipped and tumbled over with a crash. All of this had happened because I'd let my guard down talking with the goddess Astasia just moments before.
That's right. Astasia. That utterly infuriating goddess.
She sold me out?
What was the last thing she'd said? Something like, Instead of all that, why don't you just meet in person and talk it over? And then she'd erased the writing without a trace. She'd probably already known I'd run into this situation mere seconds later.
"…………."
"…………."
Had I gotten the time wrong? There was still plenty of time before the orphanage children's temple tour would wrap up. Lucia had told me she'd introduce us properly when the moment came, and that in the meantime I should give some serious thought to how I wanted to greet her. So I had been lost in deep contemplation. Well—if I was being honest, I'd spent most of that time complaining to the goddess who'd created this mess in the first place. But what good would any of that do now?
Unlike my reunion with Lucia, who'd made a grand entrance sweeping in to save me from Baron Zeke, a reunion that started with me tumbled over backwards, squinting up at an angle that looked for all the world like I was trying to peek under a skirt, was not exactly what I'd had in mind.
Wide, startled eyes. A bewildered expression. A body frozen stiff.
It was, coincidentally, the first time I could properly look at Elysia's face. I'd known her appearance well enough ten years ago, and I'd seen countless beauties while traveling the world since then, but none of that compared to the shock of facing her again.
...Wouldn't be surprising if this had an impact on the holy water sales records.
"...Hi?"
I broke the silence first, shaking off the daze.
"………."
Rather than answering, the first thing she did was pull her priestess robes tight around herself. The vestments of the Astasia Church made no distinction between men and women, but female priests typically wore a long skirt underneath. In this day and age, a hem that reached the ankles tended to leave a rather old-fashioned impression—though the very intent of covering up had a way of stirring a peculiar sense of transgression. From the angle I'd fallen, only her ankles were even visible. She couldn't tolerate even that, apparently, and gathered her skirt closed.
I thought she might be embarrassed. Then I watched her dazed expression cloud over with disgust, and I had no choice but to revise that theory.
"You..."
At first, her face was a blank. A cold tone, close to emotionless, and a voice like frost.
"Could it be... that face. Don't tell me you..."
But that only lasted a moment. Unable to keep her emotions in check, the mask crumbled almost at once.
"Why on earth... going this far... to frame me as—no. To brand me as a witch?"
Going this far? A witch? What is she talking about?
"Who the hell are you...? Someone Baron Zeke sent, right? Or did he come in person? ...I never thought you'd show up wearing his face."
Elysia bit down hard on her lip. She was so badly shaken that even her speech had started to slip, her tone shifting under the weight of it.
"Unforgivable... I'll never forgive this... Not only sneaking into the house, but trying to test me like this."
"Wait a second..."
"...And of all people... that face. Our Gray's face—how did you even know? Unforgivable. Never... I'll never forgive this."
"I think there's been a misunderstanding... And our Gray...?"
"Playing dumb now? You knew I'd lose my composure if you disguised yourself as Gray, didn't you? Stop pretending and just tell me. On whose orders is Baron Zeke looking for 'the witch Elysia'? How did you even find out about Gray? There weren't many people who knew about him back then...! No—even if they knew, how could they... using Gray to threaten me... this is just... too much..."
Elysia, who had been snapping at me without a pause, suddenly started welling up with tears.
"That's not it... Look, I am Gray..."
"...Congratulations. Your plan worked. After going this far, I suppose you have no intention of backing out now. That's right. I'm the witch from ten years ago. Elysia. Satisfied? Having fun?"
"Elysia. That's not—I am Gray."
"Oh, of course you are. You're identical enough to give me chills. But I know better. A dream like the real Gray coming to find me would never happen to someone like me."
"...I'm right here, though? Look at me. Do I look like someone else?"
"No... Even though I haven't seen him in ten years, I've been watching Gray through photographs for the past decade. That beautiful appearance blessed by the gods. That voice that makes my heart race just hearing it. That kind nature and warmth that takes other people's pain into his own hands... He's like a prince out of a fairy tale. You've disguised yourself well enough that I could almost be fooled. ...Which makes it even more infuriating."
You've got to be kidding me.
Who the hell was she describing?
Just how distorted was the Gray living in Elysia's memory?
"But... Gray has work that Goddess Astasia assigned him, so he can't come see me. And he's so busy he wouldn't have time to spare for someone like me anyway."
She said it calmly, her expression never changing. I had no idea how I was supposed to respond to that.
"Uh... so... those Covenants are all finished now."
"...You're going to keep trying to deceive me until the end? Well, whatever. I don't intend to cause trouble for the family in this house, either. If it got out that they hid a witch, that would be a disaster in its own right."
I won't just let you do as you please, she added quietly. Then she drew a small orb from her robes—something she seemed to carry with her at all times.
"...Lady Astasia. Forgive me. Gray, I'm sorry. I couldn't protect the life you saved... I wanted to see you just one more time before I died..."
And with that, Elysia wound up and hurled the orb like a bomb—
"Stop!"
"Kyaah! ...What do you think you're—doing!"
"Anyone with eyes can see that's a bomb."
"...Pretty sharp for a filthy criminal who came here to kidnap someone. This is a curse orb I made with alchemy. The moment it shatters, it's a special bomb that plunges everyone nearby into death...!"
"Then you'd die too!"
"I'm prepared for that much—"
I grabbed Elysia and yanked her in so she couldn't throw the thing. She was surprisingly strong; I had no choice but to lock my arms around her and haul her back by force. Our bodies tangled together in a clumsy knot. Elysia flinched, then, looking dazed and furiously indignant all at once, bit down hard on her lip and started muttering under her breath.
"Don't get the wrong idea... That's not Gray that'snotGraythat'snotGray... So why is my heart racing over this fake...?"
"No—I really am Gray!"
"Unforgivable...... I'll just blow up this heart that races for a fake!"
The one she couldn't forgive had become herself, not me. Hadn't she gotten this completely backwards?
But the words themselves sounded genuine. She was about to hurl the orb at herself at any second, so I had no choice but to take her down. Both our centers of gravity collapsed at once; we tumbled onto the sofa together, and the way our positions ended up tangled was simply unavoidable.
"...So you plan to violate me before you kidnap me."
"......No."
"I already gave my body and soul to Gray a long time ago. If you try to force yourself on me, I'll bite my tongue and die right here."
"I never received any of that—hey. Hey. What are you doing? Don't actually bite it! You'll hurt yourself!"
Panicked, I shoved my hand into Elysia's mouth on instinct. Chomp. Her canine sank into the back of my hand. She really had been about to do it.
...Is she in her right mind?
Just then, I sensed Lucia and Tina outside the front door. I could have cheered. They were finally here.
"Hic! Huh? Why are there shoes... Oh, right! What's wrong with me! I forgot Gray was here and just sent Ria right in—"
I prayed they would hurry. Lucia, realizing her mistake, clapped her hands together and rushed into the living room. The door creaked open, and Elysia shouted toward the woman who had just walked in on the scene.
"Sister! Tina! Run, now...! This filthy human disguised himself as Gray—mmph mmph—!"
"……… Oh my. Hehe...!"
Lucia just laughed. The hiccups from the side effects were a bonus.
"Mooom~ where should I put the leftover snacks?"
"Tina, hic! Don't come into the living room. Go back to the entrance. Shall Mommy and you go for a little walk? We can eat the leftover snacks while we're at it."
"Really? I can eat more? Wow! Mom, you're the best!"
"But you have to brush your teeth after."
"Okaaay~ *munch munch*..."
"Hic! Tina! You can't take the snacks out already! The crumbs will fall in the entrance—take them outside."
Lucia turned as if she were actually going to walk out.
Wait. Was she seriously leaving? Was this a joke?
I shouted with everything I had.
"Priestess Lucia!!! Where are you going! Help me, hurry!"
"......Hmm? Why~ it's such a nice picture."
I froze, speechless. Lucia chuckled as if she were thoroughly enjoying herself, and only then did she finally decide to help.
"Elysia. You're getting unusually worked up, aren't you? Calm down and take a closer look."
At the next words, Elysia's movements stopped dead.
"The one right there is the real Gray you've been waiting for all this time."
"………?"
"Nobody's in disguise or anything, so don't be so frightened."
And with that, Elysia's expression crumbled.