Who the Hell Did This?
“Wh-why...?!”
I despaired. When I asked her blankly in response to Selena's answer, she replied with a beaming smile.
“Hmm... how about we settle one thing first before I go?”
“What... what is it?”
Something felt ominous. The heroine of this world, grinning right in front of me, somehow looked like the Grim Reaper to my eyes.
“I'm the top dog. And you're the underdog.”
“......Huh? Yes?”
What the—sudden power trip declaration...? Could a romance fantasy heroine really say something like that?
No matter how little I knew about the original story, this was hitting me with some serious cognitive dissonance.
“Come on, repeat after me. 'Ian is the underdog, and Selena is the top dog.'”
“......”
“If Ian doesn't repeat it, I might just go tell Sylvia right now~”
“Ian is the underdog, and Selena is the top dog!”
“Perfect!”
Looking at Selena's face as her smile blossomed, I felt myself sinking deeper into some bottomless abyss.
But cowardly as it was, she knew my weak spot all too well. Once exposed, there was no choice but to bow my head obediently.
“So? What does the top dog want?”
That didn't mean I'd lost my composure, though. She knew I'd messed up the confession, and she already knew who it was supposed to be for in the first place.
So it wasn't hard to infer she had some ulterior motive for dragging out this absurd relationship.
Selena wiped the goofy grin from her face at my question and looked at me seriously.
“Can I be honest with you?”
“Of course.”
If anything, her not being honest would make me more uneasy.
“I need a strong windbreaker to fend off all the guys around me.”
Of course, after hearing Selena's follow-up, all I could do was clutch my head.
What the hell was this? Who the hell jacked up the romance fantasy heroine's intelligence like this?
Who the hell is it?
@ Headache... my headache's getting worse... I need some games and Tylenol.
I squeezed my eyes shut and opened them again, cursing the author of this romance fantasy novel in my head before speaking up.
“So, I can assume you already have a decent grasp of how people are looking at you?”
“Hmm... of course? Unless someone's completely oblivious, it'd be weirder if they didn't notice.”
You're supposed to be that oblivious heroine, though?
At this point, I was seriously starting to doubt if Selena was really the original story's protagonist. How the hell was a romance fantasy supposed to work with a heroine this smart and perceptive?
“Truth is...”
“......”
“It's a little overwhelming. They're all so much higher up in society than me, too.”
“Yeah, fair enough.”
Just looking at the lineup around Selena made her point crystal clear. The empire's prince, a Swordmaster's disciple, a rising star from the magic tower, even a prince from another country. Even without her, any normal person would feel suffocated by that roster.
I nodded lightly at her words, and for the first time, she gave an awkward smile as she continued.
“And it might sound spoiled...”
“Huh...?”
“...but I don't really like the ones who fall for me just because of my looks.”
“Oh......”
Was that her admitting she knew she was pretty?
I let out a small exclamation and nodded, and Selena's face flushed bright red.
“I-I get embarrassed too, you know?!”
“And you know that, yet you say it anyway.”
“A-anyway!”
Of course, it was only natural for Selena to be confident in her looks. Even after entering the Academy, countless people had hit on her because of her stunning beauty.
......But, naturally, my type was Sylvia over Selena. If I had to pick one—even if she was out of my league—I'd choose Sylvia without hesitation.
“You just thought something super rude right in front of the person involved, didn't you?”
“......Just a misunderstanding.”
In an instant, Selena's expression turned icy. Realizing my mistake—I'd been treating the girl in front of me like a typical romance fantasy heroine—I hurriedly denied it.
This was why quick-witted rom-fan heroines were the worst.
“......I'll believe you.”
“Thanks?”
“Whatever the case, it's not easy shaking those guys off.”
Fair enough. Thinking about it, she had a point. Some might call it a luxury problem, but from her perspective, it'd feel suffocating.
“Then why not just reject them yourself?”
She didn't want to play the villainess, but she wanted them gone. Wasn't that the vibe?
I asked with that implication, and Selena blinked her big eyes slowly before countering.
“How am I supposed to reject them when they haven't even confessed yet?”
“......Oh, right.”
Got it. If she'd accepted a confession first, sure—but her taking the initiative to reject them would...
“...turn her into the axe murderer.”
“......No idea what that means, but I get the gist, yeah?”
“Pretty much.”
But even with all these questions answered, the fundamental one remained.
“Why me, though?”
“Because you've got Sylvia.”
Of course, the answer to that was simple too.
“Having Sylvia around means I'm not too worried.”
“......And what about me?”
What about me, then?
To inevitably become Selena's windbreaker, I'd have to be seen hanging around her publicly. Not just as friends, but something closer, more intimate.
And if that happened, what about my relationship with Sylvia?
I posed that question to Selena, and she flashed a fresh, bright smile.
“You'll figure it out.”
“Cool, guess I'll pass then.”
From the start. If Sylvia found out about this relationship, it was game over for both of us.
She couldn't push her top-dog act past the limit.
I rejected her flatly with that in mind, and Selena panicked, grabbing my arm as she rushed to continue.
“J-just kidding!”
“Hmph.”
I sat back down. She'd called it top dog and underdog, but Sylvia was the type to believe me over floating rumors.
Right now, I felt guilty for messing up with Selena unintentionally, so I was willing to help. But the second it threatened my relationship with Sylvia, I'd cut ties without mercy.
No room for misplaced priorities.
“I'll talk to Sylvia properly.”
“......How?”
“If I explain my situation, it'll be fine.”
“Hmm.”
I couldn't fully trust her just because she said so. But she sounded so confident—maybe she had a plan.
I didn't want to take the heat myself, so I nodded, and Selena grinned widely again.
“Plus, not telling Sylvia would be kinda cowardly.”
“......What would be?”
What was cowardly about that?
“Nothing! If I say the confession was meant for her originally, she'll understand!”
“......Please, anything but that.”
“Kidding!”
If she did that, my sanity wouldn't hold.
I let out a hollow laugh at Selena sticking her tongue out playfully with that beaming smile, shaking my head.
A romance fantasy heroine who teased me way too well—it was suspicious.
Troublesome. All I wanted was to live happily with Sylvia, protagonist or not.
Somehow, I'd gotten tangled up way too deep.
Of course, it was karma from my own screw-up, so I wasn't in a position to complain.
“I'll go talk to her first!”
“......Please make it good.”
“Don't worry!”
I couldn't trust a rom-fan heroine with that, but one this capable? Maybe.
Thinking that, I watched her bounce away energetically, then let out a small sigh.
......My life was already feeling exhausting.
@
“You're late.”
Slipping sheepishly into the classroom while gauging the mood, I came face-to-face with Sylvia, who looked more serene than I'd expected.
Weird. No matter how well Selena had explained, you'd think she'd show some discomfort.
......Or maybe she was calm because she didn't care about me.
Either way, it was unnervingly anxiety-inducing.
With her arms on the desk and chin propped up, she turned to look at me with a faint smile.
“Hmmm......”
“Wh-what's with that?”
I flinched at Sylvia's hum, and she giggled softly.
“Not bad—snagging the Academy's it-girl.”
“You know it's not like that......”
I mumbled, shrinking back, and she nodded with an amused chuckle.
She didn't look mad—just... enjoying it somehow.
I glanced at Selena, who waved with a bright smile, not even bothering to hide it. Yet Sylvia stayed perfectly calm.
“......”
What the hell did she say?
This was making me more anxious......