Why (5)
“…What could she possibly have meant by that…? ‘Take responsibility for you three’?”
Just hearing those words made my blood run cold…
I couldn’t force out a single syllable.
Gong Na-rin and Cha Sang-hwi looked ready to intervene, trying to talk Lee Ga-rang out of it.
Instead they accepted the offer with genuine enthusiasm, eyes shining with joy.
The three of them… all of them…
Wanting me.
She’d gone completely insane.
While Eun Na-rin and her friends were under the mistaken impression that I was having a sincere conversation with my old friends,
I had no choice but to conclude that I had to escape this birthday party right now.
I forced a smile that looked like I’d just heard some ridiculous joke and answered Lee Ga-rang.
“Ga-rang, you don’t need to play these silly games with me anymore, okay? If you want us to take responsibility… how cute.”
“Cute? It’s the truth. I was just about to accept your offer. Your heart. We’re all ready to receive it.”
“I was the one who comforted you back then. It wasn’t me who hurt you with those Terra-grams. How many times do I have to say it?!”
“Wow, what a guy… how did you end up completely falling for this sweet, lying little devil?”
“You told me to get lost when you pushed me away! Why are you doing this today? I’m scared right now…”
Ga-rang looked at me with that clueless, wide-eyed gaze and spoke.
“You still don’t get it? The fact that I pushed you away is exactly why I’m here now, begging to be held, you idiot. Did you really think I hated you? How could someone as pure as you possibly dig up our secrets just to claim them? I… I really want to apologize… but whenever you go off the rails, I just give up on apologizing. Instead… you have to treat the three of us well for the rest of your life. Our beloved Hae-in. Got it?”
I fled.
I immediately told her I had to rush to Eun Na-rin.
I never even heard Eun Na-rin’s cheerful voice saying she’d see me tomorrow.
I ran, leaving Lee Ga-rang, Gong Na-rin, and Cha Sang-hwi standing there watching me, faces full of helplessness.
I ignored their sweet smiles that said they’d never let me go.
I sprinted until I reached the bus stop, then gasped for breath.
How did the kids end up like this?
Clearly, they’d gone far beyond friendship toward me…
I had finally faced them head-on today.
Damn it.
I needed to say something that actually made sense.
Asking one person to love three others at the same time.
What am I to them…
I sat on the bench at the bus stop.
Somehow, memories came rushing back—the innocent words and dreams I had when they were still little.
“Hae-in~ Remember, you belong to me!”
While playing, Ga-rang had said it with sparkling eyes.
“Hae-in, you’re not Ga-rang’s, you’re mine!”
Na-rin had pushed back, bold and playful.
“No, Hae-in is the best in the whole world!”
Even the gentle, shy Sang-hwi who’d said she was the best had smiled that way.
It had always been like this?
It was destiny.
No.
It was just because the cyber bullying had hurt their hearts so much…
that everything had fallen apart.
Their feelings toward me were twisted.
…Time would sort it out. I’d make it happen.
The bus finally arrived, and it was time to send Yoo Min-soo off.
Before going to the funeral home, I’d spent time at someone’s birthday party, sharing a pleasant moment.
It still weighed on me.
Yoo Min-soo had closed his eyes in pain,
but I…
was heading toward the bus, the one who would never open his eyes again.
Because traffic was worse than usual today,
I arrived later than expected.
I closed my eyes for a moment.
The funeral was my first time.
I didn’t know how I would say goodbye to that kid.
* * *
At the funeral home.
Besides Yoo Min-soo and his parents,
there were many others who had left the world forever to sleep in eternal rest.
The mourners were offering incense and condolences with solemn respect.
But for Yoo Min-soo,
only his distant relatives and I had come.
Choi Byung-su hadn’t arrived yet.
“Even if we’re not his parents, at least a friend came. I’m glad it’s you.”
The elderly relative of Min-soo patted my shoulder the way he had before, as if he were still my father.
As for Yoo Min-soo’s parents,
no one had come.
To the White Flame Cult followers,
his parents had not been martyrs.
Choi Byung-su had to go to the academy, so he would arrive later than me.
The time spent guarding the wake felt even longer.
The sun had already set long ago,
and I quietly told the elderly relative of Min-soo.
“Uncle. Min-su’s parents… and the other friends… are they all coming?”
“There’s no way they’ll come… they all turned into cult fanatics and ruined everyone! They’re torturing people… but even if it’s just you coming, it’s good. The road to Min-su is a little less lonely that way…”
“…”
Except for Min-su’s relatives,
I was the only mourner still present.
Guarding the empty wake while they all went to sleep,
Choi Byung-su finally arrived.
I was already nodding off when he spoke.
“You came because I said to come, but you’re sleeping? I barely made it here… manners don’t change.”
“You’re too late. You should at least offer incense to Min-su.”
I pointed at Min-su’s photo and suggested he do at least that, but Choi Byung-su didn’t even bow slightly.
The elderly relatives of Min-su, being elderly, were already asleep and hadn’t noticed his arrival,
so in practice, only the two of us remained guarding the wake.
“Let’s sit first.”
We sat face to face at the nearby table set for sitting meditation.
The sight of his glasses on today only made him look more unpleasant.
The staff had served us meat-and-gut soup, but neither of us touched it.
“You came, so delete that photo right now.”
“The photo of you drinking and partying at the room salon, right?”
“Don’t talk! Stop shouting… delete it.”
I had no idea how he’d gotten into a nightlife venue,
but Park Jun-woo had been forced to serve him as a servant, and the shame had been enormous.
As a result, he had secretly collected my weaknesses and planned to expose them at a crucial moment.
Unfortunately, I ended up using those weaknesses first.
“Even if you don’t know how you got it or who took the photo… you’ll regret it if you spread it.”
“If you tell me the White Flame Cult information you have, it will never see the light of day.”
“White Flame Cult…? What kind of cult nonsense is that…”
“I already know everything. You’re a follower, so don’t run away. Tell me even a little about the Shepherd Teacher and I’ll delete it. Deal?”
Choi Byung-su’s face showed he was seconds from throwing a punch.
But because of the weakness I held over him, he let out a long sigh and spoke.
“The Shepherd Teacher… the one who helped revive the White Flame Cult… even though the Leader was said to have reincarnated… but he’s not really back. Just remember that the Shepherd Teacher is our imperfect new Leader. I can’t say more.”
“Too vague. First, is Yang Su-hyung related to the Shepherd Teacher by blood, or is it just the Yang surname? That too.”
“Yang Su-hyung? He’s related to the Shepherd Teacher… but you won’t give me the exact relationship—son or grandson—so I don’t know either. Ask my family if you want. They’ll probably say they don’t know either. Now you’ve told me everything, so delete it already!”
“Byung-su. I want to meet the Shepherd Teacher directly… so you arrange it. I heard you have a close friend in your family who knows him.”
Choi Byung-su furrowed his brows and avoided my eyes, then looked back and answered.
“I can’t arrange it. He’s the kind of person who wants to ruin you.”
“Then… I’ll have to contact your father, Assemblyman Choi Byung-jin.”
At my words, Choi Byung-su…
—Bang!
The elderly relatives of Min-su woke up and looked at us.
They also glared at the new mourner, me.
“Joking around? Delete that ugly photo right now!”
“If you promise to arrange it.”
I didn’t back down and held his gaze.
In the end,
Choi Byung-su was the one who retreated a step.
“Haa… you think I’d really meet you if I say so? I can mock you, but like this? Fine. I’ll say it. Fuck.”
I had extracted a promise from Choi Byung-su.
I gave him a kind smile and spoke.
“Thank you. First, the photo will be deleted regardless of whether the meeting with the Shepherd Teacher is arranged, but only after you come back and report the result to me. Don’t worry. I won’t spread it before that. Understood?”
“You… you filthy…!”
With obvious disgust, Choi Byung-su glared and left the funeral home without even greeting Min-su’s relatives.
The possibility of meeting the Shepherd Teacher and me would probably be extremely low,
but even if it didn’t happen, it would become an important key to further entering the true nature of the White Flame Cult.
The task I had given Choi Byung-su was to gradually step away from the seat.
I was more exhausted than I thought,
and the meat-and-gut soup had already gone cold.
After bowing to the elderly relatives of Min-su,
I stared at the memorial photo for a long time and then left.
After offering my final farewell.
* * *
On my way home, I called my mother.
“Are you doing well? Is Father okay?”
“Hae-in. Your father is still only sleeping. Still… he seems a little brighter with me here.”
I had expected her to be gloomy, but her voice was oddly bright.
“Bright? That’s good. When Father wakes up, let’s go on a trip together. Mom.”
“Let’s do that. Hae-in… hui…”
She was about to cry again.
“Why are you crying this time? Because the promise to go on a trip together makes you happy?”
“The kids… they came. Hae-in. While handing me drinks and sweets, they held my hand and told me to cheer up…”
Ah.
Those girls.
Even if I hated them… they still cared for me that much.
“Hae-in…. Even if it takes time… be sincere with those kids… okay?”
“Yes, we have to make up… I’ll go see them… you rest.”
After ending the call with my mother, I opened the front door of my house.
It was late, so I should go see the Bipa fish first…
But three pairs of unknown shoes were neatly lined up on the floor of the shoe cabinet.
I quietly opened the front storage cabinet… took out the three-section baton I kept for self-defense and held it tight…
Come to think of it, the light was on…
While hiding my unease, I headed to the living room.
Step by step.
Step by step.
Step by step.
I raised the baton high and swung it at the unknown intruders—
then stopped.
“Oh Hae-in! Holding something dangerous like that… too much, don’t you think?”
Lee Ga-rang, Gong Na-rin, and Cha Sang-hwi were waiting for me in the living room.
The three-section baton slipped from my hand and clattered to the floor,
—Duk.
It firmly reminded me that I hadn’t just seen a hallucination because I was tired.
“You three… how did you get here?”
“We heard from Mom. She said you’d be living alone from now on.”
Ga-rang approached and held both my hands, eyes full of worry.
But why was she smiling while worried?
“Now we’ll take care of you, just like before. Are you happy that your dream is coming true?”
Ga-rang asked with a bright smile.
Gong Na-rin was also smiling at me, but she seemed not quite normal…
Cha Sang-hwi’s smile was gentle, like the angel she used to be…
“…Why?”
The only word that came out was that.
---