Chapter 73
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Translator: 8uhl
Chapter: 73
Chapter Title: A Hero's Despair
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Weeds grew sparsely across the hill of muddy clumps. But they were so few that the heavy, thick soles of my military boots sank through the mud with every step.
The moon was out. The pitch-black storm clouds that had occupied the sky for the past few months had unleashed all their lightning and scattered, allowing the full moon hidden behind them to illuminate the barracks and the surrounding area.
The air was cool, like just after a rainfall.
The refreshing breeze and my own experience in navigating the slanted hill made the climb feel less arduous.
‘What’s a guy with broken bones like Ad doing climbing a hill this high, anyway?’
I voiced a minor complaint as I felt the cool breeze. It was a leisurely… perhaps even peaceful moment.
I noticed faint flower buds sprouting between the moon-drenched weeds on the hill. The sight naturally made me think that I’d like to bring Rireu up this hill someday. In this disgustingly dreary battlefield, this hill was one of the few places that didn't reek of blood.
“Are you saying you intend to desert?”
But such peaceful thoughts vanished in an instant at the sound of Rex’s words from atop the hill.
‘What?’
Desertion.
The act of a soldier fleeing the military without permission.
Desertion was a serious military crime, so much so that deserters in wartime were, in principle, executed on the spot.
It was also the crime I dreamed of committing, one I would have pulled off in a heartbeat if I had the skills to survive the Overlords’ retaliation.
…Calling it a “dream crime” sounds a bit strange, but it’s true.
“That’s right.”
Ad answered quite calmly, and coolly.
I hadn’t reached the top of the hill yet, so I couldn’t see the expression on his face.
“I am your superior officer. Moreover, your current post is one you obtained through my recommendation. Do you intend to tarnish my name by leaving like this?”
“…Rex, why did you come to the battlefield?”
“Because I’m a warrior.”
What Rex got in response to his chiding was a cryptic question, but he answered Ad’s query without a second’s hesitation.
“…I’m envious.”
Ad spoke in a trembling voice. It was thick with exhaustion. I even began to doubt if this was the same person who had an annoyingly cheerful and bright personality.
“I wanted to be a hero. Since I was a child, everyone called me a future hero, and I myself believed I would become one soon enough.”
Ad’s voice was choked with tears. I didn’t know what he had seen on this mission, but it surely wasn't anything normal.
“…But today, I realized. I can’t be that kind of person.”
Ad, so powerless. What in the world had happened?
“I let people die. I keep telling myself it was for the mission, a sacrifice for the greater good… but the screams of Corporal Danny as he was grabbed by those… huge, filthy hands and dragged away somewhere… they won’t leave my head.”
Ad now mumbled, his voice barely a whisper.
The small voice rode the wind, just barely reaching my ears.
Who the hell was Danny?
…What had he seen?
“Today, I saw Sir Bin adorn the sky. I wanted to be a person like that, too.”
Ad paused to catch his breath, then continued in a tearful voice.
“But I probably… will never reach that level. Only one or two people with that kind of talent are born in a century.”
Just from his voice, I couldn’t tell if Ad was filled with anger or sadness.
“I saw it. I didn’t know what that look in his eyes meant at first… but now I do. Bel Artois. The man considered the most powerful among current mages… he was envious of that child who adorned the sky.”
Perhaps it was both anger and sadness.
“Do you know what this means? It means that even those with talent on par with Bel cannot become heroes.”
“…”
Rex said nothing to Ad, who was swallowing his indignation with a small voice.
He simply seemed to be watching a child writhing in pain.
“Only a handful of a handful ever reach that place… and in this era, it’s probably just the Sword Saint and Bin. I thought I was exceptional. I never doubted that I had talent. I thought I was strong in my own right, though not comparable to a general…!”
It seemed Ad couldn't even muster a hollow laugh at his own past arrogance.
He paused for a breath.
The sound of a palm striking a chest hard followed.
“…What a foolish thought. Look at me. A hero who rides spirits across the battlefield? Bullshit. I’m the guy who can’t even properly protect the life of a single comrade.”
Ad then choked back a sob and caught his breath.
His clumsy, unsteady breathing weighed heavily on my shoulders.
“The people who will become heroes are decided from the moment they’re born.”
With Ad’s despair-laced words, the sound of squelching mud followed.
It seemed Ad was finally on his way.
“Unpleasant.”
At last, Rex spoke in a low voice.
“…”
The sound of shoes mixing with mud paused for a moment.
“It doesn’t matter how you were born. What matters is how you die. It seems you didn’t want to be a hero, but a clown.”
Ad gave no reply to Rex’s words.
Soon, the squelching of mud resumed.
The sound grew fainter and fainter until it disappeared completely.
For a while, only silence lingered at the top of the hill.
I couldn’t find the right moment to step onto the peak I had nearly reached.
…Should I just go back down?
“You may come up now.”
Ah.
Right. Now would be a good time.
At Rex’s call, I slowly climbed onto the hilltop. There, only the large-bodied orc and the still-vivid footprints remained.
“Uh…”
Rex’s back, turned as if he were looking in the direction Ad had left, looked incredibly bitter.
“I apologize. You trusted me with personnel authority, and this has happened.”
“No, I have no intention of blaming you, Rex. It’s just… unfortunate, is all.”
Honestly, I wasn’t as disappointed about Ad’s absence as I let on. We’d only known each other for a few days, and my first impression of him hadn’t been great.
“He was always going on about being a hero, like a child. His conduct… was somehow far removed from reality. So, I’m not that surprised.”
He’s gone now, so I can speak my mind.
I candidly shared my true feelings about Ad with Rex.
“That’s because he is, in fact, a child.”
“…But I’m younger than he is.”
“You have experienced many things, General. You’ve met an Overlord, and you’ve been in and out of dungeons dangerous enough for artifacts to be discovered since you were young.”
The part about going in and out of dangerous dungeons since I was young was a lie.
I never thought that lie I’d casually spun would come in so handy.
“Compared to you, that boy Ad is a child. Despite his talent and skill, he has only ever faced weak Mazoku or Mutants. Thanks to that, he’s never experienced a crushing failure or defeat in his life.”
Rex said this as he quietly descended the hill.
“…Twenty is a suitable age to become an adult. At least, that’s what I think.”
Looking at Rex, I wanted to ask, ‘By the way, the number of my guards has decreased. What are you going to do about it?’
Ad leaving was one thing, but we had to prepare for what came next.
Rex seemed bitter about Ad’s departure since they had known each other before, but I felt no such emotion about his absence.
Whether Ad becomes an adult or lives his whole life as a brat, what do I care? He’s no longer my guard, just a mere deserter.
* * *
The lights in the generals’ barracks were always on until late at night.
Grisha had to record the total number of injuries and deaths for the day, and Bel had to grasp the current war situation and formulate future plans.
But tonight was different; only a small lantern illuminated the inside of the barracks. The two, who would normally be buried in paperwork late into the night, had less work than usual today.
The reason Grisha’s workload was lighter than usual was thanks to none other than alcohol and tobacco.
Usually, soldiers at the peak of their stress would cause trouble or self-harm, becoming casualties. There were also occasional absurd mistakes, like their concentration dropping and hitting an ally with magic. But today, thanks to the alcohol and tobacco, the soldiers’ stress levels had dropped, and such accidents were significantly reduced.
The sobered soldiers proved they were the continent’s finest elite, fending off the swarms of Mutants and Mazoku with little damage. The number of wounded today was a mere eleven, and aside from those who went on the mission with Bel, there were no fatalities.
Bel, too, who would normally be wrestling with reports and maps until dawn, was able to close his eyes early tonight.
The operation to infiltrate enemy lines and plant the parchment was a success. On top of that, the boy had drawn attention even more spectacularly than expected.
The Mazoku Overlords would not stand by and watch this situation unfold. They would launch an aggressive offensive to eliminate the being known as Bin, and the continental army just had to counter it.
The trap had been set.
Now, it was time to wait for the crayfish and fish to be caught.
“General Bel, are you asleep?”
A small voice, carried by the faint lantern light, came from the entrance of the barracks.
“What is it?”
Bel, who had been lying on his cot with his eyes closed, asked without moving. Grisha and the boy were already deep in sleep, despite the early hour.
“A letter has arrived.”
As if what he had been waiting for had finally come, Bel opened his eyes and got out of bed.
“…Who is the sender?”
Bel asked as he slowly walked toward the entrance.
“The Grand General.”