That Pig Bastard
As soon as we stepped into the mansion, a man greeted us with a booming voice.
“Come now, young guests! Step right in!”
“I am the master of this city! Vickra Altea.”
It was a name I’d never heard and a face I’d never seen. Wow. He really is a textbook villain noble. This was my first time laying eyes on Vickra, but that didn’t matter. Anyone—even a child—would have had the exact same thought the moment they saw him.
It can’t be easy to look this perfectly stereotypical.
The bloated belly, the gaudy jewelry layered on for no reason, the eyes glistening with naked greed, and that shiny bald head. He was the very image of a corrupt noble drawn straight from a storybook.
Frankly, he even reeks of new money.
There wasn’t the slightest trace of the dignity a man in his position should carry. As the temporary governor of Altea, he had to be a member of the Altea family, yet he somehow managed to look this vulgar. It was almost impressive.
“It’s a pleasure, Lord Vickra. I’m Helio Helisbort.”
“Diana Diabeluna.”
Whatever my personal feelings, he was undeniably the person in charge of the city. We had business regarding the pilgrimage to discuss, so I set my emotions aside and offered the most courteous greeting I could manage. Common sense dictated that a host should respond in kind.
“Hoho, to think the children of a ducal house would visit us. Are you enjoying your stay in our city?”
“Yes, the scenery is beautiful.”
“I’m quite proud of it. After all, such views can only be maintained when those above tend to them properly, wouldn’t you agree?”
“Is that so?”
What the hell is wrong with this guy?
But the bastard wasn’t a man of common sense. Right now, his eyes flickered with blatant lust as they roamed over Diana like a tongue. This pig was completely ignoring me, his focus locked entirely on her.
He’s not just a lecher. This guy is openly looking down on House Helisbort.
Even if a family’s rank was slightly lower, nobles were still nobles. A certain level of respect was expected. That was simply how society worked. Of course, Helisbort was indeed a notch below Altea in status. Still, we were a great noble house in our own right—not the kind of name that could be casually scorned.
Yet here he was, showing open contempt. It was so ridiculous I couldn’t even get angry.
Is this what they mean by “looking the part”?
“By the way, isn’t Lady Diana old enough to enter the academy? I heard enrollment could be delayed, but has something happened to House Diabeluna?”
“If that’s what you’re wondering, it’s because of this.”
Diana took out the Spiral of Good Deeds and showed it to him. Since Vickra managed Altea, that alone should have been explanation enough.
“...? Is it a gift?”
“You’ve got to be kidding me.”
“.........”
Vickra glanced my way after my muttered slip, but quickly lost interest and turned back to Diana.
“...Perhaps it’s some trinket that’s popular among the youth these days?”
“...No, I apologize. There is a reason we’ve postponed our academy enrollment together.”
“I see. Don’t take my words too harshly. In all my years, I’ve learned that studying is—”
The pig must have been irritated that we shared something he didn’t understand, because he suddenly launched into a long-winded lecture. He spoke with fake passion, sneaking glances at me the whole time. His eyes practically screamed, Hey kid, what’s your relationship with Lady Diana?
To think I’d receive such a look from someone who wasn’t even family. It was beyond anything even a pseudo-possessor like me could have imagined.
“.........”
The actual Lady Diana was shooting me a pleading look for help, but what was I supposed to do? Escaping the situation without committing a rudeness of my own...
Actually, I think it’d be fine.
He was the one who started being rude first. And this idiot didn’t even seem to know anything about Pilgrims.
“I’m only saying this because she feels like a daughter to me.”
They probably hadn’t bothered telling someone they planned to throw away.
“I heard the city has been rather noisy lately.”
So I struck.
“What do you mean?”
And sure enough, I got a reaction. The man who had been acting like I didn’t exist finally looked me in the eye.
“Nothing much. I simply heard there was a thief in this very mansion. It had me worried.”
“Haha, what a needless concern. No such thing happened.”
“Is that right? My ears must be failing me then.”
“You little bastaaard...”
A low, animalistic growl rumbled from his throat. Of course an idiot like him wouldn’t actually believe I was expressing genuine worry.
“Please don’t get upset. It wouldn’t look good if people thought you couldn’t even manage a city that bears your family’s name.”
By now, there wasn’t a single person in the city who didn’t know about the thefts. In other words, it was a brutal jab that said the entire city thought he was an incompetent fool. And fools are always especially good at recognizing when they’re being insulted.
“Get out.”
The order to leave came immediately.
“My, it seems you don’t have the leisure to entertain guests after all.”
“............”
To harbor such raw hatred over just a few words. Pure malice burned in Vickra’s eyes.
“Then we’ll take our leave. Let’s go.”
“We’ll be on our way. I hope you stay safe.”
Despite Diana’s polite farewell, the pig refused to even look at us.
“What the hell? Is he actually brain-dead?”
The moment we stepped outside, the words slipped out. It couldn’t be helped. No matter how you looked at it, he was the master of one of the empire’s most prominent resort cities. The fact that he was this much of an idiot was genuinely shocking.
“So he really was someone we didn’t know about.”
“No wonder you got hit so many times in Altea...?”
“Unfortunately. The chart is only fully established around the academy area.”
“Even then, that seems off...”
“I think so too.”
It felt like every premise we’d been working from was crumbling. In that overwhelming sense of powerlessness—where both my game knowledge and Diana’s regression knowledge had suddenly become useless—
“Excuse me... Are you Young Master Helio?”
“Ah, yes.”
The person who came looking for me was the branch manager of the HelloHello Trading Company.
“Here is your tea.”
“Ah, thank you.”
“My, please speak comfortably with me. Wasn’t it you, Young Master, who laid the foundation for our company?”
“It’s only because my parents were good at catching my silly ideas.”
“Haha, but without your ideas, we would never have started at all.”
“Well...”
I lifted the teacup to my lips at the branch manager’s words. Unfortunately, I wasn’t thick-skinned enough to casually indulge in self-praise.
“To be honest, I never imagined you would come here yourself.”
“Well, it is around the time for academy enrollment.”
“Exactly. So when we received word from the main house, I was quite surprised, but...”
“Since we already found a place to stay, there was no need to visit the company.”
The branch manager looked slightly disappointed at my answer.
“If you had come, I would have served you with the utmost care.”
“Thank you for the thought. But it’s not the right time, and if someone as important as you came for no reason, it would only dampen the mood in the office, wouldn’t it?”
It was only natural that our trading company had a branch in a major city like Altea. If we hadn’t found any other options, we would have had no choice but to come knocking. But thanks to the special privileges given to Pilgrims, we had easily secured a room.
The empire and the temple are already providing all the necessary support anyway. There’s no need to burden the family on top of that.
“But you knew I was coming? From the main house?”
I was a little flustered by the unexpected remark, but Diana spoke up before I could say more.
“I told them. Everything—from the kidnapping to the pilgrimage.”
“I heard you’d spoken with them before, but you really went into every single detail...”
House Helisbort had gone through plenty of strange situations thanks to Descent, so they seemed to accept it without much trouble.
“Kidnapping... you said?”
And of course, anyone not used to such bizarre circumstances would be stunned.
“There’s no need to worry. It’s all over now.”
“Y-yes...”
The branch manager shortened his words at my reassurance, but his face was still full of suspicion as he looked at Diana.
“Ah.”
Then, as if he had realized something, his face turned deathly pale.
He must have figured out she’s the Mad Dog of Diabeluna.
With her striking appearance and high position, she was actually quite easy to recognize.
“By the way, there’s something I’d like to confirm.”
“Please ask.”
“The man who came as temporary governor of this resort city—Vickra Altea. How exactly did he end up in that position?”
The branch manager looked at me with understanding.
“If you’ve met him in person, then it makes sense. In any case, he is a man of poor character.”
“...Have you met him directly?”
“No. But he did demand money from us.”
“Huh...”
If it had been legitimate taxes or minor bribes to smooth transactions, he probably wouldn’t have mentioned it. In other words, Vickra Altea had extorted a trading company directly operated by a great noble house.
“He really is insane.”
I hadn’t visited precisely to avoid burdening the company, but maybe I should have.
“It’s in the past now. And honestly, it would be hard to say we bore no responsibility at all.”
“What do you mean by that...”
“The circumstances of the incident are as follows.”