Chapter 77
Translator: RaidenTL
Chapter 77
The space wasn’t particularly large.
Books and trophies filled one wall. Beside them, in the center of the room, an elderly man with a dignified air sat in a white coat, looking up from a monitor on his desk.
He was Eun-ah’s doctor.
The doctor shifted his gaze from the monitor to Eun-ah and offered a greeting.
“Welcome, Go Eun-ah-ssi. It’s been a month, hasn’t it?”
“Y-Yes…”
As Eun-ah timidly hid behind me, I found myself face-to-face with the doctor. I managed an awkward smile and greeted him.
“Uh… hello?”
“Yes, it’s a pleasure to meet you.”
The doctor replied with a serene smile that matched his dignified appearance. As I wondered how to navigate this awkward situation, he spoke first.
“Please, have a seat over here.”
He gestured to the chair across from his desk. I went over and sat down. The doctor then began speaking to Eun-ah, who had kept her head bowed low the entire time, asking how she was doing.
Had she been well? Had there been any discomfort? Had she been taking her medicine?
It was a conversation that seemed, at a glance, entirely one-sided.
Perhaps this was what it meant to be a doctor. He maintained a gentle smile even as Eun-ah responded to his questions with nothing more than a slight nod. Soon, he finished his conversation with her and nodded with that same smile.
“Your progress is excellent. I think we can reduce your medication a little this time.”
At those words, Eun-ah’s expression brightened for the first time since we had entered the consultation room.
“Okay…” she replied, nodding.
Then, thinking the consultation was over, she stood up and tugged lightly at my sleeve, speaking in a small voice.
“L-Let’s go now…”
“Ah…”
Seeing her spirits lift slightly as she spoke to me, I felt a wave of unease.
Ugh…
If we left now, my chance for a private talk with the doctor would be gone. I had to somehow send her out first so I could get even a brief explanation on how to handle Go Eun-chae.
As I was racking my brain for the right words to persuade her, the doctor spoke to me.
“Ah, would the guardian be able to stay for a moment? There’s something I’d like to discuss with you separately.”
At that, both my head and Eun-ah’s snapped toward the doctor. A calm smile remained on his dignified face as he added:
“I just have a few questions. Go Eun-ah-ssi, would you mind waiting outside for a moment?”
“Eek…!”
When the doctor directed the question to Eun-ah, she flinched and began to tremble, her anxious eyes fixed on me.
Her grip on my sleeve tightened, and she bit her lip so hard the blood drained from it, turning it white.
I stood up and gently stroked Eun-ah’s cheek, speaking to her with a smile.
“Can you wait outside for just a little bit? I’ll be quick. I’m starting to get hungry.”
Finding a breakthrough in this unexpected support, I spoke in a gentle voice. Eun-ah, who had been whimpering softly, clutched my arm tightly before finally nodding.
“H-Hurry… Promise…”
Standing on her tiptoes, she whispered into my ear. I smiled again and nodded. She stared at me for a moment longer before slowly making her way out of the room.
The door to the consultation room closed. As I was watching it, the doctor spoke.
“You two seem to be on very good terms.”
I flinched and turned my head toward him.
Seeing the doctor looking at me with a faint smile, I felt a flush of embarrassment from my recent cringeworthy display.
“Haha…”
As I let out an awkward laugh, the doctor, who had been sitting in his chair, stood up, approached me, and offered a handshake.
“I’ve heard a lot about you from Go Eun-seol-ssi. It’s a pleasure to meet you.”
So they’d already been in contact.
She could have at least told me.
For a moment, I felt a sense of futility, having racked my brain over how to get a private meeting. I took his outstretched hand with my own and replied.
“I’m Chae Dokyun.”
“I’m Pyo Chang-sik. As you can see, I’m Go Eun-ah-ssi’s physician.”
I looked at the doctor, Chang-sik, as he smiled again.
“Honestly, I was quite surprised. I never thought Go Eun-ah-ssi would be able to become so close to anyone.”
Is it time to bad-mouth her? I thought, looking at him. He let out a hearty laugh and added an explanation.
“What I mean to say is that her condition was just that poor.”
I gave a slight nod.
He was right. When I first met her, she was so dangerous that anyone could see she wasn't in her right mind.
“Um, since you said you’ve heard the gist of the situation, can we get straight to the point?”
I asked, looking at the doctor. I was worried about Eun-ah waiting outside. Her expression had been dark ever since we’d arrived at the hospital, and I felt uneasy leaving her alone.
“Ah, of course. We shouldn’t keep Go Eun-ah-ssi waiting.”
He agreed.
I nodded again and asked the question I had prepared.
“I heard you were told about Go Eun-chae. Do you have any idea how she might act?”
The separation was proceeding steadily. If I could just handle the moments when Go Eun-chae emerged, the rest wouldn’t be a problem.
The issue, however, was that I had no idea what that impatient, crazy bitch might do.
With that thought, I posed my question. The doctor walked slowly back to his seat as he answered.
“Well… that’s something I don’t know either. Dissociative Identity Disorder is such a rare condition that there’s no definitive guideline. We only have general protocols based on past cases about how to act.”
That was a very long-winded way of saying he didn’t know.
As I narrowed my eyes, the doctor saw my expression and added with another calm smile.
“So, I think it would be best if I just tell you about the characteristics I’ve observed in her over the years.”
What followed were a few facts the doctor had discovered after observing her for a long time.
“Hmm, first… regarding the trigger that brings Go Eun-chae out…”
He trailed off. I finished his sentence with what I already knew.
“When something happens that she can’t handle, when a situation she doesn’t want occurs. Is that right?”
Go Eun-chae’s role.
To handle situations that contradicted Eun-ah’s delusions.
Recalling that, I spoke, and the doctor nodded slightly in response.
“Good. Since you know that much, the rest of this will be easier.”
Then, sitting back down in his chair, the doctor looked at me, his expression hardening slightly as he continued his explanation.
“Go Eun-chae is a personality that isn’t completely separate from Go Eun-ah-ssi. To use an analogy… they’re like two sides of the same coin. Because of that, the moment Go Eun-ah-ssi changes into Go Eun-chae is difficult to catch unless you’re observing her closely.”
I already knew that.
I nodded, and the doctor continued.
“The most prominent characteristic when the personalities switch is, first of all, the facial expression. Go Eun-chae has strong sociopathic tendencies. Her capacity for emotional empathy is extremely low, so her ability to cope with emotions according to the situation is nonexistent. That’s why, if you watch carefully, you can feel the moment it happens.”
I thought I knew what he meant.
The moment Go Eun-chae surfaced, all expression vanished from her face.
Her hollow gaze would become prominent, and no matter what expression she tried to make, it was tinged with an awkwardness, as if she were merely imitating something.
“By this point, the switch is already halfway complete. If we consider the stage before that… yes. Go Eun-chae wants to swallow Go Eun-ah-ssi whole. That’s why she sometimes refers to herself as ‘Eun-ah.’ That part becomes more pronounced when a switch is beginning, or when the personalities are fighting for control.”
“Ah.”
“Something comes to mind, doesn’t it?”
It did.
The moment I first woke up in that house.
—I’m not all better yet… so Eun-ah will take care of you…
And on the first day, when I feigned sickness to try and get out of the room.
—Ah, if you’re sick, then Eun-ah is sick, too…
So those were the warning signs.
It was certainly a characteristic that stood out when her emotional fluctuations became uncontrollable.
As I finished my thought and nodded, the doctor continued.
“Go Eun-chae is a very dangerous personality. Even aside from her impulsivity, her motive for wanting to possess the body is far too dangerous.”
Because she couldn’t understand that she had to share the body with other personalities.
“Go Eun-chae considers it perfectly natural that she should be the master of that body. That she, not Go Eun-ah-ssi, is its owner. She genuinely believes that.”
It was something I already knew, but having it confirmed once more…
Squeeze—.
My fist, resting on my knee, clenched tightly.
As I stared at the doctor, filled with tension, he presented a method for separating Go Eun-chae.
“To completely separate Go Eun-chae, you have to make Go Eun-ah-ssi acknowledge Go Eun-chae’s existence.”
The method for separation.
Hearing that, I tilted my head at the perceived contradiction and voiced my doubt.
“How? Isn’t it more dangerous to let Eun-ah-ssi know about her other personalities?”
Go Eun-chae emerges the moment a rift between delusion and reality occurs. In other words, it’s the moment Go Eun-chae becomes necessary.
I asked my question with that in mind, and the doctor nodded in reply.
“That’s right. And that’s why my hopes for you, Dokyun-ssi, are so high.”
“For me?”
I asked, puzzled by his sudden endorsement. The doctor smiled gently and answered.
“The prerequisite for treating Dissociative Identity Disorder is to build a rapport with the patient. I failed to do that.”
Just as he said, Eun-ah didn’t hide her aversion to this hospital and this doctor in the slightest.
“That’s why you’re needed, Dokyun-ssi. Because it seems Go Eun-ah-ssi likes you very much.”
“Um…”
Hearing it from someone else made me feel a little shy, and as I fidgeted, the doctor let out a hearty laugh and continued.
“If she can be happy without needing her delusions, if you can take Go Eun-chae’s place, then it won’t be difficult for her to acknowledge an alter she no longer needs.”
In the end, it was no different from what Eun-seol had first explained to me.
“Please, make Go Eun-ah-ssi happy.”
Make it so she doesn’t have to hurt anymore.
Realizing this, I felt the question I always carried with me surface in my mind once again.
Who was I? What meaning did a single reader hold for her that she would cling to me like this?
Why had I been given such an important role?
As I was lost in that question, I shook off my thoughts and looked back at the doctor, who continued speaking.
“Once you separate her from Go Eun-ah-ssi, her removal is easy.”
“Pardon?”
“Did Go Eun-seol-ssi not tell you? Go Eun-seol-ssi’s control over the other personalities is absolute. Right now, she’s lost a little of it to Go Eun-chae, but the moment she gets it back, it’s over. There’s no way for Go Eun-chae to escape.”
She had told me. That if I could just separate Go Eun-chae, she could handle the rest herself.
But still.
To that extent?
I felt a fresh wave of surprise.
I hadn’t realized her authority was that powerful.
As I stared at the doctor, my mouth agape in astonishment, he let out a small laugh and brought his words to a close.
“You should go now. Go Eun-ah-ssi must be waiting.”
It was a clear dismissal.
There was still so much I wanted to ask, and I was about to voice another question.
“Ah, um…”
I started to say, but the doctor cut me off with a faint smile.
“I can’t carelessly share a patient’s personal information, no matter how close you are. I trust you understand.”
“Ah…”
I nodded. There was nothing more I could ask that the doctor, in his position, could answer.
Having made my decision, I stood from my seat and bowed to the doctor. He returned the gesture and added one last thing.
“I’m counting on you.”
A request.
I nodded in response, then turned and walked out of the consultation room.