Chapter 19
Translator: RaidenTL
Chapter 19
My toes curled in on themselves without me even realizing it. It was a reaction to the temptation pressed against my body. I have to endure it. I have to hide it. Dokyun repeated these two thoughts over and over, forcing his tightly clenched toes to relax as he began to read the manuscript.
“Hanna’s life could be called a life of solitude.”
“Everyone, with the exception of Hanna, had no desire to know what they truly were.”
“Hanna was a human, alone in a world of monkeys.”
Reading the manuscript aloud was embarrassing, but the need to hide the state of his lower body, where blood was pooling, was a far more powerful motivator, forcing Dokyun’s mouth to move.
“Do they truly wish for salvation?”
“Was I the one who was wrong? Was this all just my own self-righteousness and arrogance?”
Should he call it a relief? Even in this situation, the woman’s novel had the power to draw a person in. As he continued to read, his thoughts focused to a single point, erasing the rising shame and filling its place with admiration.
“Without me, this world is complete, a single, unified order.”
“I was the foreign object in this world.”
His lips continued to move. When he came to his senses, he found he was completely immersed in the story, the sensation of her arms wrapped around him and the flesh-colored images in his mind all scattered and gone.
After that, he continued reading until the manuscript finally began to approach its end.
“Nevertheless, because she was human, because she held love in her heart, she did not know how to stop.”
He turned the last page, and behind the manuscript, he saw his own thigh, which had been supporting it. Dokyun turned his head to the side and spoke to Eun-ah, who was sitting dazedly, leaning against his arm.
“It’s good. The immersion, especially in the descriptions of her inner thoughts, was excellent.”
His words reached her, setting her pale face ablaze. Her cheeks flushed crimson as she let out a giddy, unrestrained laugh.
“Hehe… Th-That’s a relief…”
So saying, Eun-ah lifted her head to meet Dokyun’s eyes and spoke again.
“And…? What else… what else d-did you like…?”
“The way you depicted the character relationships, and the foreshadowing you sprinkled in the middle, makes me curious about what happens next.”
He said it without faltering. As long as he didn't think about the fact that she had written it, the story itself was genuinely good.
“Hehe… And…?”
“The…”
Dokyun’s mouth paused. Her eyes, staring up at him, were filled with expectation. If he stopped talking now, that face would transform in an instant. He had to think of an answer. His mind spun rapidly, weaving together the next words.
“The… the fight scenes were good. I liked how the scenes played out in my head as I read.”
“Hehe… Th-Thank you…”
Her face was so red it looked like it would burst if he touched it. Eun-ah began to rub her cheek against his bicep, whining.
“Q-Quickly…”
“Pardon?”
A bewildered sound escaped his lips. Quickly what? The subject was missing, making it difficult to understand her meaning. Her wheedling voice stabbed into his ears once more.
“Th-That… Do that for me…”
“Ah… That, that…”
What the hell is ‘that,’ you freak!
Cold sweat began to trickle down his back. What could it be? What was she talking about? Dokyun’s mind raced, analyzing her words, but he couldn’t deduce a proper answer.
Just then, as silence fell between them, Eun-ah’s brow furrowed slightly as she rubbed her cheek, freezing the atmosphere. Then, words revealing her displeasure shot from her lips.
“Y-You have to… pat my head…”
“Your… head?”
What was she talking about? As Dokyun reeled from the out-of-context word, Eun-ah lifted her head, met his eyes, and offered an additional explanation.
“I-It’s only natural to pat someone’s head when you praise them…!”
For fuck’s sake, we’ve gone from kidnapping to rewriting the laws of common sense!
The absurdity of it was almost admirable. He didn’t have the faintest clue what was so “natural” about it, but contrary to his thoughts, his body moved honestly and began to stroke her hair.
“Ah, haha…! I’m sorry, I keep forgetting.”
“Hehe…”
The hair that wound through his fingers was surprisingly soft. A laugh filled with satisfaction escaped her lips, and just as he was thinking it was finally over, a wave of relief washing over him…
“And…? What else… what else d-did you like…?”
Shit…
Did she have some kind of critique fetish? That damned “and…?” had come out again. He had to think. What hadn't he said yet? What could he say that would please her? His thoughts raced, and a sentence tumbled from his lips.
“The, the prose is really good. It’s my favorite style of writing.”
“L-Li…”
Hearing Dokyun’s hastily added words, Eun-ah ducked her head low, muttering his praise as if savoring it. A moment later, she lifted her head again, her eyes moist as she looked at him. Her lips parted.
“I… I l-l-l-like you, too…”
A chill ran down his spine.
Not you, your writing style!
Dokyun felt a shiver of horror as he watched her twist his words to mean whatever she wanted. Even though he had just showered, he felt the clammy sensation of cold sweat soaking his back.
There’s no room to let my guard down!
The moment he relaxed, she would strike at the opening. He couldn’t afford to lower his guard. Forcing the twitching corners of his mouth into a smile, Dokyun spoke to Eun-ah.
“But shouldn’t you be writing the next chapter now? Your readers must be waiting…”
“Mmm… I-It’s fine… I’ve already taken care of it all…”
Taken care of what? The manuscript? Or the readers?
A blood-red image flashed through his mind, but Dokyun quickly erased it and replied with a smile.
“That’s great. Your preparedness is very… yes, it’s excellent.”
Her preparedness was excellent in many ways. The manuscript, and the confinement. As Dokyun was thinking this, stroking her hair, Eun-ah, who had been savoring the moment with her eyes closed, suddenly shot up as if remembering something.
“Oh, r-right… You have to eat dinner…!”
“Pardon?”
Already?
Had that much time passed? There wasn’t a single clock in the house, so it was hard to feel the passage of time.
Seeing Dokyun’s confusion, Eun-ah nodded emphatically.
“Yes, yes…! It’s t-time for dinner now…”
With that, she started walking toward the kitchen, calling back to him.
“I’ll have it r-ready in a moment… so please wait…!”
“Haha… Yes, take your time.”
Dokyun watched her head to the kitchen, replying with a smile. Then, seeing her moving about busily, he finally let the tension drain from his body and leaned back against the sofa.
I’m going to die.
The mental stress was no joke. Was it because only two days had passed? He wondered if it would get better once he got used to it.
Wait, am I even sure it’s been two days?
His only way of perceiving the flow of time was through her instructions. He could only vaguely estimate how much time had passed by when he ate, showered, and slept.
What if it hadn’t been two days? What if she was deliberately trying to alter his daily routine? What if not even a full day had passed? Or conversely, what if it had been three days?
Dokyun raised a hand and wiped his face.
I’m going crazy…
His thoughts refused to settle. He began to take stock of his current state.
His mind was being chipped away, little by little. Whenever she was watching him, he felt his reason become paralyzed. The stress of dealing with someone impervious to common sense and logic was hitting him much harder than he’d anticipated.
For what he judged to be two full days, she was the only human he had spoken to, and he felt himself being dragged along by her emotional tides. Thought driven by momentary instinct was beginning to take precedence over long-term, logical reasoning. His emotions, which had always been under his control, were stirring, threatening to break free.
He felt like he was losing his mind. Thinking about how, just a moment ago, his entire focus had been consumed by the soft sensation of her body against his, and how he couldn't even accurately perceive the flow of time now, it was clear his judgment was becoming impaired.
He looked up at the light fixture brightly illuminating the living room. It was much better than being in the dark all day like on the first day, but even so, looking at that light filled his mind with depressing thoughts.
He wondered if that lightbulb was the only light he would ever see for the rest of his life. He wondered if, like that fake lamp mimicking the sun, he would have to live his entire life putting on a false face and feigned emotions for her. And he wondered if, in the end, he would start deceiving himself, wanting to believe the lies were the truth.
Dokyun closed his eyes. He couldn't let his thoughts continue down that path. His reason wasn't functioning properly, swept away by the constant barrage of events since he’d woken up here. He tried to pull himself together, to calm his churning heart.
He closed his eyes and scattered the chaotic thoughts, creating a void in their place. He inhaled, then exhaled, refining his breathing into a steady rhythm. The tension drained from his body, and the thoughts that had been burning hot and expanding wildly finally subsided.
As he meditated, his cooled head instantly began to boil again, but this time it gathered the scattered, wild thoughts and focused them on a single point.
Slowly. One thing at a time.
Don’t rush, and don’t give up. His eyes opened. The scent of cooking food reached his nose.
Grumble—.
Only then did the hunger hit him. Just as she’d said, it seemed a fair amount of time had passed while he was reading the manuscript. He lifted his head and looked toward the kitchen, where dishes were being set on the dining table one by one. It seemed they would be eating at the table.
She’s not locking me in the room like the first day.
The more that happened, the more a certain hypothesis solidified in his mind.
There’s something about that notebook and the picture frame.
The notebook and frame that had been on the shelf behind the bed. There was definitely something there. And more.
In this living room, in that kitchen, and everywhere else.
There had to be clues she hadn't managed to dispose of. He thought with a cold, clear head.
The conclusion is the same. First, I have to do something about this collar.
He had to snatch the key from her pocket. Without her noticing, naturally, in a way that she wouldn't suspect him even if the key went missing.
There will be plenty of opportunities.
She wanted to stick close to him whenever possible. She wanted to be close enough for their skin to touch.
I have to use her impulsiveness.
When she gets flustered, she gets sloppy. It had happened after dinner on the first day, and in the shower room when she’d been distracted by his body.
Something. A way to shake her, to distract her.
He thought back over the past day. He already knew the answer.
My body.
The thing she stared at, drooling. Dokyun’s fist clenched tightly. He gritted his teeth, a testament to his miserable state.
This is no time to be picky.
He had to escape. He was already losing control of his emotions. Even now, they were surging erratically, clouding his mind.
I have to get out. I have to get out to live.
He had to sneak the key away when she lunged for his body. He took a deep breath, once again calming his roiling emotions.
Let’s do this.
As he solidified his resolve, Eun-ah, who had finished preparing dinner, called out to him.
“I-It’s ready…!”
Right after her voice sounded, she approached, one step at a time. Soon, she was right in front of him. She took the key from her pocket and unlocked the collar around his neck.
“Sh-Shall we go now…?”
Dokyun felt his mind waver at the renewed sensation of her flesh as she linked her arm with his, but he quickly steeled himself, forced a smile onto his face, and answered in a soft, gentle tone.
“Yes.”
I am a Knight of Ttaeng-kkeon.
He thought of a novel he’d read long ago, back when he used to rent books from the video store. He pictured its protagonists, who were hosts.
I am the protagonist of a reverse harem novel.
He thought of the protagonists from a genre that had recently become popular in the underbelly of the internet—a genre where pretty boys frolicked like king bees among powerful, older women.
Finally, he thought of the protagonist who had most recently moved his heart.
I am.
The legendary ace of a host bar, who handled countless crazy women.
I am Shinwoo.
He pictured the man whose name was common, but whose way with women was anything but.