Chapter 158
Translator: RaidenTL
Chapter 158
For me, the act of writing was a kind of compulsion.
The reason… what else could it be? It’s just how I was born.
I was obsessed with a stolen story, yet I couldn’t bring myself to hate the mother who had stolen it. Eun-ah created me for that very reason, so I could never stop writing.
It was my duty to continue the story Eun-ah had loved, the story that had been stolen from her. For me, writing was a compulsion.
I had to vent my anger.
It was not my own anger, but it welled up inside me all the same, and I had to release it.
I had to hate.
It was not my own hatred, but my emotions commanded it, so I had to hate my mother.
The story could not end.
If it did, the story would no longer be Eun-ah’s. Every last piece of the tale she had desperately clung to would be stolen away.
And so, the story could not be allowed to end.
That is why I wrote the final volume of that never-ending story countless times.
I wrote, erased it, and wrote it again. Erased it, and wrote it again. An endless cycle.
Time passed like that.
My mother was no longer there.
But still, the story could not end.
Eun-ah’s heart closed off. I vanished from her.
And still, the story could not end.
A story that had lost its purpose drifted aimlessly, continuing its voyage.
Perhaps that was why I grew so weary.
I was afraid of a future where I had to continue a story that would never end. It felt less like a voyage and more like an endless dive, as if I were falling into a bottomless sea.
Perhaps that was why I was so exhausted.
And so, when I came to know you, I was finally able to find salvation.
In the online community Eun-byeol introduced me to, I saw your posts and was saved.
Do you have any idea? On the day Eun-byeol showed me that community, you were the one who turned me into one of its resident ghosts.
As I was sinking without end, the thing that pulled me up was a simple post you wrote at that very moment.
=
[Deep Sea Honeybee: What’s so wrong with a dropped series, ffs]
Seriously, you fucking assholes, why are you shitting on a series that was dropped because the author died?!!!
└ WuxiaLover: Yeah, right. Spoken like a true abortion-fiend~
└ HornyTank: It was dropped, right? Aborted, right? Never gonna be finished, right?
└ Deep Sea Honeybee: Your parents should’ve aborted you guys, too.
=
There were words I was too ashamed to say myself.
To me, who was continuing a story that would never end, it felt like you were telling me it was okay to stop. That’s what I mean when I say I was saved by those simple words.
And so, to you, who saved me—to you, who didn’t even know me—I wanted to gift you a story made just for you, with all the things you liked. That’s why I started writing a story of my own.
=
[Deep Sea Honeybee: Why isn’t there sex-fu in the Heavenly Demon’s Divine Art?]
This is discrimination against sex-fu!!!!
└ MuzzigiMuzzi: LMAO Heavenly Demon’s Erectionㅋㅋㅋ
=
The story you imagined—I wanted to write it for you.
=
[Deep Sea Honeybee: The Knight Commander is a tank, ffs]
You think full plate armor is a joke?
└ tprtmzld: Gets one-shotted by a magic missile, right?
=
I wanted to give you a story that would make you happy.
=
[Deep Sea Honeybee: At the end, the hero pours out all his strength]
And after beating the final boss, he just turns his back and walks away coolly. Isn’t that the golden rule?
└ MeowMeowHeavenlyDemon: Where’s the mindless breeding press ending with the heroine?
=
And so, I wanted to convey all the gratitude I could never express in words.
I thought that if I did, I could finally end this voyage without a destination. That my own story could finally reach its conclusion. That was why I started writing.
And on that day when I finally met you, I felt like my heart was going to explode.
The thought that I could finally show you my story, that I could finally give you this gift, was completely overwhelming.
At last, this story had found its owner.
It had become a twisted and strange novel somewhere along the way, but I was still so grateful that you read it.
And so, because of you… because I could finish the story I wrote thanks to you… because my story, which had been on an endless voyage, could finally come to an end…
‘Finally…’
I could leave with a sense of relief.
My gaze fell on you—on Deep Sea Honeybee, on Chae Dokyun.
“Oh, I didn’t know there was a place like this in the neighborhood.”
“What d’ya think?”
“It’s incredible.”
For some reason, the sight of Chae Dokyun’s sparkling eyes made me smile.
I’d brought him to a scenic night view spot I’d stumbled upon one day, and seeing him this happy made it all worthwhile.
Still chuckling, I spoke to him.
“It’s my temporary shelter, y’know.”
“You know about places like this?”
“Damn right! I’m the top dog in this neighborhood, ain’t I?”
“Oh, my. How very impressive.”
This punk. He should at least act grateful. Even as I thought that, a smile escaped my lips.
I shifted my gaze from Chae Dokyun and looked out at the neighborhood in the distance.
Beneath the pitch-black night sky, the whole town was lit up in a kaleidoscope of colors, making my chest feel wide open.
For this to be the last thing I see… it’s a pretty amazing ending, isn’t it?
“Hey, dude.”
“Yeah?”
“Thanks.”
Thump.
Chae Dokyun’s body froze.
Pathetic guy. If you’re like this already, what are you going to do later?
“Thanks to you, my novel that was stuck in the Deep Sea finally rose up, y’know. I’m really grateful, dude.”
“…Byeol.”
Chae Dokyun’s expression crumpled. Look at him, getting ready to cry again.
“You cryin’?”
“I’m not crying.”
“Then why’s your face like that?”
“…I’m sleepy.”
He could at least put some effort into his excuses. With a face that looked like it was about to burst into tears, Chae Dokyun was desperately scrunching up his features to hold them back.
Man, would it be too selfish of me to feel grateful for seeing him like this? Still, a small sense of gratitude welled up that he was sad for me.
Feeling a bit awkward at the emotions rising within me, I spoke again.
“Honeybee-dude, you’re a real pro when it comes to squeezing out tears.”
“That damn way of talking of yours…!”
It’s so you won’t be as sad, you know. Everyone but Eun-ah knows you’re a crybaby, so why bother trying to hide it…
‘…No.’
Eun-ah will find out now, too. Because I’m leaving. Because I’m going to leave this memory behind in my place.
‘Hmm, that should be interesting to see.’
I wonder what kind of face Eun-ah will make when she finds out this guy, who always acted so cool in front of her, was actually the world’s biggest sap.
It was a little disappointing that I wouldn’t get to see it. But hey, if I get hung up on things like that, I’ll never be able to leave, will I?
I shook off the lingering regret and turned my head toward Chae Dokyun.
“Don’t cry, dude. Anyone would think you’re about to die.”
“…I told you, I’m not crying.”
“Putting on a brave face.”
Ah, I couldn’t stop laughing. Isn’t this all just a side-splitting comedy?
Chae Dokyun crying like that, and my own situation, finally leaving.
“Hey, dude.”
“…What.”
“You can have all my boys. I can’t even ride them anymore, can I?”
“You’re riding one right now.”
“Hey, I mean I’m giving you spiritual ownership, ain’t I?”
My gaze scanned Chae Dokyun again. He was already back to looking at the night view, sniffling.
There was something I was a little, no, very curious about. To be honest, I was halfway sure of the answer, but I still wanted to ask him directly and hear it for myself.
“Hey, dude.”
“What now.”
“My novel. What’d you think of it?”
The novel I wrote because of you. The novel I wrote because I was so grateful to you.
Was it okay? Did it make you happy? Did that novel, the story I wrote, mean something to you, too?
That lingering curiosity made me ask the question.
At my question, Chae Dokyun started sniffling again before finally forcing out the words.
“It’s fucking weird.”
“Heh, knew it, huh?”
“But it’s fun.”
“Huh?”
“It’s fucking weird, but it’s fun. It’s like… the smell of balls.”
Saying that, Chae Dokyun looked at me, a creaky smile on his lips, and continued.
“I don’t review just any novel. You don’t know me?”
The answer came. I blinked blankly for a moment, then burst out laughing as I replied.
“Damn right! You’re Deep Sea Honeybee, the A-list user of the novel community!”
“That’s right, punk.”
Ah, I’d asked the question just wanting to hear something nice, even if it was an empty compliment, but I got a pretty decent answer back.
I cackled again, unable to contain the rising cheerfulness, and held out my fist toward Chae Dokyun.
“Who are we?”
Ah, maybe not.
He always freaked out when I did this, so I thought maybe I’d gone too far this time and was about to lower my fist.
“…The Jokester.”
Tuk.
Our fists met.
My eyes widened as I stared at him, and Chae Dokyun forced a smile as he spoke.
“I’m only doing it ‘cause it’s the last time, you punk.”
At his reply, I couldn’t help but let out a dry laugh.
“Thaaanks!”
The little bastard. He knows a thing or two about sentiment, doesn’t he?
With a face full of cheer, I pushed myself off the railing I’d been leaning on, turned to face Chae Dokyun squarely, and wove my farewell into words.
‘Hmm…’
I want to make a really cool exit.
How should I say this? I mulled it over for a moment, smacking my lips, until the right words came to mind. I continued with a smile.
“Thanks to you, I had a great time!”
Start with that.
“The third-rate author, Go Eun-sam, is going to end things right here.”
Add a line like that.
“So from now on, you just give the first-rate author, Go Eun-ah, your exclusive attention!”
Yeah, an ending just like that would be perfect.
After saying my piece, I looked at Chae Dokyun.
His face was filled with surprise at my words. Well, it must be awkward since I’m not using my usual internet slang.
It was completely understandable. Even I felt awkward saying it.
I chuckled at the thought and threw the words Chae Dokyun had just said to me right back at him.
“I’m only doing it ‘cause it’s the last time, you punk!”
He begged me to speak normally, so what’s the harm in doing it for him at the very end?
As I cackled and said that, Chae Dokyun, with a face that was somewhere between crying and laughing, shot back his reply.
“Thaaanks!”
He was returning the exact same answer I had given him.
In response, I put on the brightest smile I could manage.
My thoughts continued. My long, long story flashed through my mind.
Hmm, how should I define it?
‘Ah.’
This is good.
‘That was fucking awesome.’
It was the absolute best.