Chapter 110
Translator: RaidenTL
Chapter 110
What she said next was something Dokyun was hearing for the first time.
“When people see something beyond their comprehension, they react in one of two ways. With awe, or with fear.”
Eun-seol swirled the glass in her hand. She watched the small vortex form inside it, her thoughts seeming to follow its motion before she spoke again.
“Seo Han-gyeong’s reaction was fear. Her pride wouldn’t allow her to feel awe for the daughter who came from her own womb.”
A smirk escaped her lips.
Dokyun was certain it was a sneer. It had to be, because even as she smirked, Eun-seol’s expression remained as hard as stone.
“Well, even if that wasn’t the case, her reaction was understandable. How many people wouldn’t be terrified if a five- or six-year-old kid walked up to them with blood streaming down her arm?”
Dokyun flinched.
Her words made another sentence from the diary flash through his mind, and a shiver ran down his spine.
-Today, I was sick in Mother’s place again.
His fists clenched. The thought that a little girl, barely five or six years old, had resorted to such a method just to be loved was so sad, so infuriating. That was why his fists clenched so tightly.
“After that day she confronted Go Eun-chae, Seo Han-gyeong’s madness grew worse than ever. The moments she was lucid became rare. Back then, Go Eun-chae had even less of a sense of boundaries than she does now.”
With a distant look in her vacant eyes, Eun-seol continued, as if recalling a past even more remote than the one she had just described.
“Seo Han-gyeong had a fit every time Go Eun-chae appeared. She’d throw things, she’d shriek and scream. Then one day, she locked Go Eun-ah inside this house.”
Dokyun’s eyes widened.
“The reason this house is built like this…”
“It’s because of Go Eun-chae. We added a few things to hold you, but this was the basic structure.”
It was a reason he had never imagined. He had been so sure they had designed this structure to imprison him. The house within a house. The door locks installed in reverse. The windows sealed with electrical tape.
“What in the world…!”
As Dokyun’s boiling anger erupted, Eun-seol watched him and let out a small smirk.
“It’s in the past. Just know that. So, back to what I was saying… it was effective, in a way. The more outrageously Go Eun-chae acted, the more ground Go Eun-ah gained. Seo Han-gyeong started to cherish Go Eun-ah more.”
His face contorted at her words.
Even he could see what a terrible method it was.
“It was the worst. From Seo Han-gyeong’s perspective, she was clinging to Go Eun-ah out of fear of Go Eun-chae, but from Go Eun-ah’s perspective, that wasn’t it at all. The more Go Eun-chae rampaged, the more she was loved. In the end, everything Go Eun-chae did became a ‘good deed’ she had to perform to be loved.”
It was twisted. Twisted and tangled beyond belief. There was no other way to describe the situation.
“The irony is, those were the happiest moments of Go Eun-ah’s life. It was the period when she was loved the most. Because her entire world, Seo Han-gyeong, would hold her tight whenever Go Eun-chae acted out.”
Eun-seol let out a deep sigh and downed the entire glass of liquor she had filled to the brim.
“That setting notebook is from that time. The moment Go Eun-ah was loved the most, she created it, hoping Seo Han-gyeong would see it and praise her.”
Dokyun’s gaze followed her chin to the notebook.
[The Rusty Sword and the Hummingbird’s Tomb]
His first love, if he dared call it that.
“It was a time when Seo Han-gyeong was racking her brain to write a new book. Even as her madness worsened, she had to produce some kind of result.”
“A result… you say?”
“Yes, a result. I don’t know if you’ve pieced it together, but Seo Han-gyeong was the family’s disowned child. Go Eun-ah’s grandfather hated flawed people.”
Flawed. To abandon your own child for such a reason. It was something Dokyun couldn’t possibly comprehend, and his confusion showed plainly on his face.
Eun-seol glanced at him, then let out a small breath and added an explanation.
“From the grandfather’s perspective, Seo Han-gyeong was a nuisance. A woman whose return on investment converged to zero. She did nothing to help the company. She insisted on being an artist and writing, but she had no representative work to speak of. To top it all off, she came home pregnant with some unknown man’s child. Do you think he would have looked upon her kindly?”
Only then did it start to make sense. It was true that before publishing The Rusty Sword and the Hummingbird’s Tomb, all of Seo Han-gyeong’s works had failed.
“Well, to Seo Han-gyeong, this house was no different from a place of exile. She was living a life others couldn’t even imagine, but she was still less satisfied than when she lived in her father’s house. That’s why she was so desperate to produce a work, any work, to gain his approval.”
Hearing this, Dokyun felt a hollow laugh escape him.
“And the best she could do was steal her own child’s story?”
“If it meant getting that approval, there was nothing she wouldn’t do. Go Eun-ah’s feelings were never important to Seo Han-gyeong.”
Dokyun picked up his own glass and drained it. His throat felt parched, as if it were burning away.
“Of course her eyes would light up. Who would have thought a five-year-old kid could write something of that quality? From Seo Han-gyeong’s perspective, it was an unexpected windfall.”
“A windfall…”
“It would have been a windfall if Go Eun-ah had been just a little dumber. It would have been a happy ending for everyone. Seo Han-gyeong gets her success, and Go Eun-ah gets her love.”
At her words, Dokyun’s gaze fixed on Eun-seol. With deeply sunken eyes, she refilled their two empty glasses.
“But as I said, Go Eun-ah was a kid whose ability to think was beyond human levels. She knew Seo Han-gyeong was stealing her story. And Seo Han-gyeong was stupid enough to proudly place the published version of the stolen work on her own bookshelf.”
“What the…”
The woman was unbelievable. As Dokyun let his thoughts slip out, Eun-seol chuckled softly and continued.
“You know, Go Eun-ah was strange, too. As much as she loved her mother, that was the one thing she couldn’t seem to forgive. She could have just given up the story and been loved, but she couldn’t, and she started to resent her mother.”
An obsession with a story. It reminded him of someone.
“But even then, she was terrified that if she resented her mother, she would no longer be loved. So she read that book, the one her mother stole and published, until the pages were worn thin, and split her own mind.”
Dokyun realized what she was talking about.
“That’s when Eun-sam appeared, wasn’t it?”
“You catch on quick.”
He remembered something from months ago. When he first went into the study and found that book, it alone had been exceptionally worn by countless hands.
If what Eun-seol said was true, it meant Eun-ah had stared at that book all day long in order to fracture her own personality.
As he listened, a sense of dissonance suddenly struck him. He looked up at Eun-seol.
“Then did Go Eun-sam appear before you, Eun-seol?”
Throughout the entire story, Eun-seol hadn’t mentioned herself once. The question arose from that omission. Eun-seol remained silent for a moment before finally answering.
“I was here long before that. I just couldn’t do anything.”
Her voice was a low murmur. When Dokyun tilted his head in confusion, she continued, her tone tinged with a hint of regret.
“Do you remember what I said about her locking the door whenever Go Eun-chae came out?”
“…Yes.”
“That front door wouldn’t open until Go Eun-ah returned. Which means, whenever I was out, I was always trapped in here, unable to do a thing. Seo Han-gyeong never had a clue I existed.”
“Ah…”
As she spoke, a sentence flashed through Dokyun’s mind.
A line from the diary, written in an exceptionally shaky script.
-I’m so cold.
It was about this. She was always alone in there after Go Eun-chae appeared. Meaning, she emerged while bleeding profusely.
Dokyun realized it then. That sentence wasn’t just about feeling cold. It was about the hypothermia that sets in as your body loses blood.
The moment he understood, Dokyun’s expression crumpled. Seeing his face twist, Eun-seol let out a short breath and spoke again.
“Well, that’s not important. What’s important is that after Go Eun-sam was separated, Go Eun-ah’s delusions began to overwrite reality.”
How could she say it wasn’t important? She suffered just as much. No, perhaps she was the one who had suffered the most.
“Once she separated Go Eun-sam, there was no longer a reason to hate Seo Han-gyeong. In Go Eun-ah’s mind, that book became a story she and her mother were creating together. It became a tool for her to be loved.”
As Dokyun stared at her with a grief-stricken face, Eun-seol let out a heavy sigh.
“Don’t make that face. It’s all in the past for me.”
“How can you…”
“If you really feel sorry for me, then make Go Eun-ah happy. That’s all I need.”
She cut him off. Hearing her wish, Dokyun felt his lips press into a tight line.
Because in the future Eun-seol wanted, there was no place for herself.
Dokyun felt his fists clench.
In that moment, he felt something faintly. Something in her words, in her expression.
It was little more than a gut feeling, but it came with a strange certainty.
She was planning to disappear the moment Eun-ah became happy.
“…I refuse.”
Eun-seol’s gaze snapped back to him, her brow furrowed.
“What are you…”
“I can’t accept that reason. If it ends like that, it means you’ll have been unhappy until the very end.”
It was unacceptable.
Dokyun hated tragedies. Every story he knew had to have a happy ending.
“Give me another reason. I can’t accept that one.”
Perhaps it was stubborn, almost irrational. She was telling him what she wanted, and here he was, refusing to accept it, overstepping his bounds.
He knew that, but he still hated it.
“You’re planning to disappear once Go Eun-chae is gone and I’m left, aren’t you?”
“…”
No answer came. But Dokyun could feel that her silence was an affirmation.
Dokyun thought of the other personalities.
Eun-ji wanted to be spoiled to her heart’s content. Eun-sam wanted to finish her story. Eun-byeol… he didn’t know for sure, but she must have had a reason for herself.
Even Go Eun-chae had a wish for herself.
“Just give me something small. A reason, like something you want to do for yourself, Eun-seol.”
“…We keep getting sidetracked.”
“If you don’t tell me, I won’t listen to the rest of it either.”
Dokyun crossed his arms. To him, Eun-seol was just as important as the story behind the notebook.
Seeing this, Eun-seol’s face crumpled into a frown. She let out a deep sigh and began to think.
She didn’t drink. She simply stared blankly at the liquor in her glass, lost in thought.
A long silence stretched on before her answer finally came.
“…I want to drink all day without a single worry.”
The answer sounded trivial at first, but in those words, Dokyun could feel that she had lived a life where she had never once been free of worry.
A wave of sorrow washed over him again. Forcing the corners of his mouth into a smile, Dokyun nodded in satisfaction.
“Sounds good. I’ll be your drinking partner then.”
“Says the bastard who can’t even hold his liquor…”
He winced at her retort.
“…If I drink like I’m planning to die, I’m sure I’ll manage.”
“You’ll wreck your stomach.”
“That’s a problem for tomorrow’s me to worry about.”
“…Fucking idiot.”
Dokyun stole a glance at her as she spoke.
Her words were a rebuke, but her tone was soft. Feeling a sense of relief, Dokyun extended his left fist, leaving only his pinky out.
“It’s a promise.”
It was an offer to link fingers. Eun-seol looked at his hand, let out a deep sigh, and replied.
“Are you a child?”
Another rebuke. But even as she said it, her finger was steadily intertwining with his.