Awkward Family Gathering (2)
Our family had always been one for frequent gatherings with the relatives. Dad had two younger brothers, and the three of them got along so well that they saw each other often and spent a lot of time together. Thanks to that, my relationships with my cousins—including myself—were as close as real siblings.
You could tell just how tight we were from the fact that, even after hearing the news about me turning into a girl, they immediately added me to the group chat and kept messaging me steadily.
Even just checking the messages, I could feel the lively chaos.
What do I do now...?
They weren't strangers, and they knew I used to be a guy, so my feelings were all jumbled up. Yeonseo unnie was the same as me—a sufferer of the gender transformation disease—and also my attending doctor treating me. So there wasn't anything burdensome or awkward about her. My family, except for my brother, treated me the same regardless of my gender. Thanks to that, I could open up relatively easily and share my honest thoughts.
So... I just had to act like I normally did around family, right? Logically, it shouldn't be that hard...
But the mounting tension made my hand tremble as I gripped my smartphone.
I can do this... My social phobia's been getting better little by little, right?
My messed-up sex hormone balance was returning to normal, and a few times a week, I was handling things... on my own pretty well. So I wasn't as psychologically or physically unstable as before. On the contrary, I was getting used to life as a girl, and my current routine felt as natural as if it'd always been this way.
Ugh... still so nervous!
Ding-dong!
"Eek!"
I'd been taking deep breaths to calm down when the doorbell rang from afar, making me gasp in surprise. They must've arrived way earlier than expected, because soon the front door opened, and footsteps echoed inside.
I hurriedly slipped out of my room and hid against the wall by the second-floor stairs, peeking out just enough to scout the entryway.
"Hello! Big Aunt, we're here!"
"I heard you're acting again these days? Something about a movie role?"
"Brother-in-law, how've you been?"
Familiar faces I hadn't seen in ages were greeting my parents energetically at the door, creating an overall bright vibe.
Watching from hiding, I couldn't time my entrance, squinting and counting numbers inwardly.
"Huh? Is that Sua over there?"
That's when it happened. My eyes met Jin Yu hyung's as he was unloading stuff.
"Eek?!"
Startled, I let out a feeble scream and flinched.
"Wha?! Huh?! Ugh! Ack!!"
Too flustered, I missed a step on the stairs, lost my balance, and went sliding right on my butt into view in front of everyone.
Luckily, it was a low step, so I didn't get hurt much, but suddenly all the relatives' eyes were on me.
"......Gasp?!"
Lying sprawled in the entryway, I blankly stared at the ceiling. Relatives' gazes poured down on me.
I'm screwed...
"A-Are you okay?"
"Ahhh...."
Mom rushed over and helped me up. Standing there in front of everyone, I could barely lift my head from embarrassment. Especially Chang Kyu hyung and Jin Yu hyung's blatant stares bugged me.
It felt unreal that these were the same guys who'd chatted so casually in the group—they stood with mouths shut tight, eyes glued to me.
If I just stood there dazed, it'd get awkwardly weird later when we were alone, so I hurriedly waved at them with the biggest smile I could muster.
"Hehe...."
"Oh, h-hi... Sua... yeah, it's you...."
"We... been watching... your streams... lately...."
Their reactions were worlds apart from the chat, giving off a strange disconnect. The air felt so awkward it made me doubt we'd really talked games and dirty jokes just before.
Ah... this is uncomfortable...
We hadn't been this awkward before, and the unease made me avert my eyes too, unable to meet theirs properly.
"Sua, long time no see. Must've been rough on your body—have you been okay?"
As the awkwardness hung between us brothers, Second Uncle spoke to me first. His gentle smile and outstretched hand, free of any awkwardness, carried the relaxed poise of an elder.
My hand shook a bit from nerves, but his familiar warmth eased me somewhat.
"H-H... hi... hel... looo...."
"Hahaha, still hard to talk, huh? Not too uncomfortable?"
"Ahhh......"
"Brother Changseop, Sua might feel overwhelmed, so how about we head in and chat slowly?"
Third Uncle, who'd been watching quietly, suggested. Everyone nodded without complaint, grabbing bags and moving to the living room one by one.
"Sua, if you're uncomfortable, rest in your room and come down later. You guys might feel awkward too, but treat her like normal."
Dad, the eldest here, fixed his unusually serious work-mode gaze on the cousins, who were stiff even at home.
Feeling it, they flinched, shoulders jerking, then nodded in agreement and sidled right up next to me. With our height difference—two heads at least—I naturally looked up at them.
"Ehehe...."
I smiled at them, trying to meet their eyes, signaling please take care of me.
Chang Kyu hyung, gauging the awkward air, finally spoke up decisively.
"G-Games? That fighting game you streamed last time... we've been practicing it too."
"Didn't you drop it after like an hour?"
Jin Yu hyung narrowed his eyes.
"What?! You didn't even start!"
"What does that matter?! At least I'd beat you."
"Says the noob? Hey, Kim Sua! Set it up! Time to show you what fight—oh, sorry...."
They bickered excitedly like always, but Chang Kyu hyung suddenly apologized to me mid-sentence.
Even acting normal at first, the moment our eyes met, the mood turned awkward and overly considerate. It bugged me, so I mustered courage and grabbed their hands first.
"L-Let's... go... up...."
"Huh? To your room?"
"F-For real?!"
"Yeah...."
To their repeated you sure?s, I nodded. Taking their hands, I led them up to my room on the second floor.
They followed limply, like pulled by my grip. Midway, the adults half-jokingly warned them not to try anything funny, but these shy guys froze like statues just from hand-holding, so I figured it'd be fine.
"Huh? Room's the same as ever?"
"Ah, these are the comics I lent you? Been looking for 'em—here they are!"
Once in my room, they relaxed at the familiar sight, glancing around before each finding something to do. Chang Kyu hyung headed straight for my manga shelf; Jin Yu hyung plopped in the computer chair and booted up the PC like it was his.
"Yo, still got those pornos I gave you ages ago?"
"Ah, didn't you share 'em with me too?"
No sooner had the PC started than they dove into my private files with their usual lewd banter.
Ah... just like I remember...
Seeing them giggle and act without restraint like typical guys their age eased my mind a bit. Sure, now that I was a girl, they were hyper-aware at first, and with one girl and two hormonal boys alone... worries came first.
"Ah, sorry... no, damn, keeps coming out as sorry...."
"Screw it, overthinking makes it worse. We shared porn links and all...."
Pausing their porn talk, Chang Kyu hyung and Jin Yu hyung exchanged looks, nodded, and stared straight at me.
"Honestly? Was scared shitless coming into your room."
"Same. Room being the same helped me chill, though."
Just like in the chat, they eased into a comfy vibe.
They both nodded vigorously and yelled like listen up.
"Duh!! Good thing you still look like the old guy, or we'd be freaking out!!!"
"We always teased you for being kinda pretty, but... damn, you're actually pretty now."
Focused on my year-long change into a girl, I'd forgotten. Come to think of it... during the transformation, beyond just long hair, my looks must've shifted a lot outwardly too. Parts that unwittingly screamed girl probably piled up...
Why hadn't my family noticed those changes? The question hit me.
"Face got slimmer, sure, but still got a lot of the old you."
"Yeah, short hair and it'd be back to normal, right?"
Really? As they chatted about my old guy looks, my gaze drifted to the album from a year ago on the bookshelf.
I'd dreaded even looking during the changes... Thinking back, mentally I'd been pushing away and forgetting my past self out of fear.
Truth be told... even now, my tastes in the opposite sex and some parts were still guy-era. But my appearance was getting used to girl-me. I even felt more distant from guy-me.
The album... maybe I can look now?
The thought crossed my mind, and before I knew it, my feet carried me toward the bookshelf.