Mine, By Me, For Me § Yoo-na
"……."
She lay on the bed with her eyes closed, sifting through old memories. It had been so long that she could barely recall why she had gone to the library that day. All she remembered was meeting Do-yun for the first time.
"Heh."
He had been so innocent back then. She could still picture him sitting in the library, flipping through a book with those tiny hands. Curious about a kid their age actually reading, she had struck up a conversation. That was the beginning. They became friends.
Whenever she had a question, she would head to the library, and Do-yun was always there in his usual spot. When she ran for class president in elementary school. When she fought with a friend in middle school. When studying felt impossible in high school. When she decided to run for department representative in college. When she worried about finding a job. When she fretted over her younger siblings. Even the smallest concerns—there were countless ones—Do-yun always had the right answer, the perfect solution.
His advice was always correct. The only times things went wrong were when she ignored it.
"Looking back, I really was immature……."
She had dumped every single worry onto him. Even when she chose not to listen, it happened more often than she cared to admit. The endings were rarely happy. But things were different now. She was twenty-seven, an adult. She understood how sharp, how intelligent, how wise Do-yun truly was.
She wanted to help him the way he helped her, but she couldn't. Because he never seemed to need it. The weight of that debt pressed heavier on her chest. She could ignore it and keep living as the one who only received help. But that went against her nature. It was too…… heavy.
So what could she do? Her mind raced. She wasn't clever enough to offer him advice. "There are definitely things he can't do alone." If she could handle those for him instead……
Only one thought filled her head, as if nothing else existed.
The next day at work, in the car on the way to an outside assignment, she spoke to Do-yun.
"So, Do-yun."
"……No."
"Why not~. I said I'd be your personal secretary. You can use me however you want~."
"I said no."
No! Why not~!
"I told you it's fine to use me to your heart's content, so why are you saying no~."
She shot him a sulky glare. Do-yun stared back, looking utterly exasperated.
"Does that even make sense? Between friends."
"Then there's nothing I can do to help you~."
He scratched his head, looking troubled.
"Do-yun, just listen for a second?"
"……What now."
"No, just listen first~!"
Smack! Annoyed, she slapped his arm hard enough to make a sharp sound while he was driving.
"Ow……"
"I hit you on purpose so it would hurt."
Anyway!
"Okay~. Do-yun, you…… um……"
Now that she was actually saying it, everything she could think of was something he could already do himself. Well, any normal person could.
"I could clean for you instead!"
"It's annoying, but I can do it."
"Grocery shopping? Dishes? Laundry?"
"Same thing."
Damn it. She stuck out her lower lip.
"Aah~. I said I'd be your personal secretary~. You can order me around and use me however you like~."
"……Why are you like this? We're friends."
She narrowed her eyes.
"You always help me. Let me help you too~!"
"……No."
It was always like this. That was why the debt kept piling up.
The next day. And the day after. She clung to him for three whole days—before work, after work, through texts and calls.
[I'll be Do-yun's personal secretary]
[Do-yun's exclusive secretary]
[Just let me~]
Messages marked as read, but no replies. This guy……
More days passed. She considered other ideas, but her brain stubbornly supplied only images of being his personal secretary—following him around in a suit like some drama character. Too cliché. In real life, she'd only ever seen personal secretaries in dramas or movies.
"Are you serious……?"
"Of course!"
She had been whining about it as usual when his reaction changed. He scratched the back of his head, looking awkward.
"Haah. Hey, what if I ask you to do something weird?"
"Huh? As long as it's not illegal, it's fine~."
"……What if I say I want to have sex with you."
"Huh? Of course……! Uh……? Hic……"
She hiccuped in surprise.
"I'm asking what you'd do if I actually told you to do that."
"……Th-that's…… obviously…… fine, right?"
Her eyes drifted away.
"Hey. Look me in the eye. Can you do whatever I tell you to?"
She was flustered, but quickly steadied herself.
"As long as I can be helpful in some way."
Sex wasn't illegal, after all. So…… yeah. She could do it. Probably……?
"Forget it."
"Huh? Why not~! Hey~."
He stuck an unlit cigarette between his lips and stopped.
"Yoo-na."
He lowered the cigarette.
"Yeah?"
"Want to come over tomorrow and hear what I have to say?"
She nodded vigorously.
"If you listen and still think it's okay, then ask me again."
"Got it! So right now it's still no?"
Do-yun shook his head. The refusal stung a little. No matter what he said, she would agree anyway.
"And Yoo-na."
"Yeah……?"
"Can you look at this for a second? I need to stack five floors."
Five floors? She didn't understand, but nodded anyway.
Fwoosh!
One second. Two seconds. Three seconds.
Ah. She knew this feeling. Like sinking into warm water. She surrendered to the familiar, languid sensation. Knowing what it was only made it harder to resist.
— Do you trust him?
"……Yes……"
She did.
— Do you trust his methods?
"……I do……"
He had never been wrong.
— That's right. His methods are always correct.
"……They are……"
She agreed with the voice echoing directly in her mind. She had already decided to help however she could.
— You must believe in him.
"……What……"
— You must believe his words.
"……Yes…… I'll believe……"
— Especially you. You must believe in him.
"……Especially…… me……"
The voice kept repeating. She had to believe in him. Not just "believe," but believe with every fiber of her being, as if something terrible would happen if she didn't.
— You must believe his words and follow them.
"……Don't worry……"
She would. The whispering voice settled deep in her heart. At first she wondered why it kept insisting she believe. Soon the voice's owner became herself. Even she had to believe. She had to trust and follow his words. Because she was his personal secretary.
Whoosh!
§ Saturday.
The weather was bright and clear. Cold air drifted in when the window was open, but it stayed warm once it was closed.
"……You're not going to show me?"
Despite Yoo-na's question, I kept staring out the window. Once the atmosphere felt right, I slowly turned to face her.
"……"
"……"
An awkward silence. Yoo-na waited calmly. The major buildup was over. Unlike before, this time it wasn't driven by lust.
'My' secretary. A secretary 'by me.' A secretary 'for me alone.' Lee Yoo-na.
I sat in front of her.
"I'll tell you."
She perked up, adopting a serious posture to match my tone. I slowly explained my thoughts—everything that had happened so far, leaving out anything involving her. Han So-jeong. Kim Na-eun.
"Really……?"
"Yeah. I thought about what you said."
The acting mattered. It would help the suggestion take deeper root.
"I wondered if there was anyone I could help. That's why I used the hypnosis app."
I didn't mention how I'd obtained or created the app.
"That's what I plan to keep doing."
I declared to Yoo-na, who was still processing it all.
"Can you still be my personal secretary?"
She couldn't answer. Given her personality, this would trouble her. She had always been quite conservative about anything sexual. Asking her to help with other women…… it wouldn't be easy.
"……"
She thought for a long time. I wasn't impatient. There was only one answer she could give.
"……I'll do it. I'll be your secretary."
Her wavering pupils steadied. They shone with the same sharp, bright clarity I'd seen the first time I met her at the center. A light directed at the values, memories, and beliefs I had reshaped.
"That's the right answer, isn't it?"
She smiled brightly instead.
"You know, I won't waver anymore. When I didn't listen to you……"
Something seemed to surface in her mind.
"I know exactly what problems I ran into. So I'll believe you."
Her steady, unwavering gaze made my heart race.
"Do you know what a secretary does?"
"……What do I have to do?"
Ah. She had these airheaded moments sometimes. Well, it was fine. That clumsiness was part of her charm too.
"All sorts of things."
I explained her duties. Designing hypnosis setups together. Keeping me in peak condition. And finally—
"Sex practice."
"……Hwet. Ah! Mm. I'll help."
Same as ever.
"Just like people have different personalities, they have different sexual preferences too, right?"
"Mm. Right, right."
Hey. What was with that face that said she didn't get it but was agreeing anyway?
Anyway.
"So we should practice in advance, don't you think?"
"……Mm-mm."
Her expression and mouth seemed to be operating separately.
"Since it's the weekend, we can practice for two whole days, right?"
"Right now?"
"Why not? When else would I hypnotize you?"
Yoo-na's face flushed crimson in an instant.
"Ah, okay. What do I do?"
"I already found something."
I pulled out my phone and opened the folder of photos Kim Na-eun had sent me.
"Hup……"
Yoo-na held her breath the moment she saw them. She was so fun to tease. Her reactions were incredibly satisfying.
"Na-eun had an exhibitionism kink."
"Ah…… Mm……"
"But like I said earlier, it's embarrassing to tell her boyfriend. She can't show it to just anyone either."
Yoo-na nodded. Her easy acceptance was partly thanks to the memory alteration. Since my methods were always correct, she was certain others would feel the same.
- Haaht! Aahng! Are you watching? Huuung!
Yoo-na looked completely lost at the heated moans coming from the video, yet her eyes stayed glued to the screen.
- Drip, drip! Na-eun trembled on the toilet, squirting, and Yoo-na gasped in shock.
"Ah…… Wow…… Wow……!"
What kind of reaction was that? Cute.
When Na-eun spread herself open for the camera, Yoo-na blinked rapidly.
"Ugh…… Do I…… have to do that too?"
"Yeah. Obviously."
"Hwaat."
She looked embarrassed. After watching a bit longer, something else caught her attention.
"Her chest……"
She glanced back and forth between Na-eun's chest and her own.
"Yours is pretty enough."
"……You've never seen it."
Whoops.
"Still, thanks for the compliment~."
She shrugged at my answer.
- Slap! Slap! -Haaang! Huung! Are you really going to get me pregnant……? Huuung!
Especially during the first-person POV shots where I spanked her while thrusting, Yoo-na's mouth fell open.
"You filmed that yourself?"
"Yeah."
"Ah. Ah. I-I see……?"
She fanned herself and looked away.
"Y-you did it?"
"I told you I did."
"R-right. B-but hearing about it and seeing it are different."
She stammered while watching her friend's sex video.
"That's all. This is everything. It was hard doing it alone."
"Mm……"
She kept fanning herself, as if the room had grown hot.
"Hot? Want me to open the window?"
"N-no. I'm f-fine."
When I set the phone down, silence returned. She really had no resistance to this kind of thing.
"Will you still be my secretary after seeing that? You can back out now if you want."
Yoo-na, who had been avoiding my gaze, looked straight at me. Her face was red, but her eyes shone.
"I'll do it. This is how I can help."
"Yeah. I'm going to have sex with other women."
"……"
Yoo-na raised her index finger and spoke firmly.
"No. You're helping solve their problems. If you say it like that, people will misunderstand."
Hmm. I just wanted to have sex in various roleplay scenarios. And get them pregnant if possible. I was a man, after all. But since she was making excuses for me, I might as well be grateful.
"Got it."
"So, have you decided on the next one?"
She asked seriously. I shook my head. Not really. It hadn't been long since I got the app, and I had no foundation yet. If I went around hypnotizing random people, things could go very wrong. So I had to be extremely selective.
"Then……"
Perhaps because she had already made up her mind, she approached it seriously. After thinking, she met my eyes. My face was reflected in her clear, transparent pupils.
"Choosing the counseling targets is your job, right? Since you're my employer."
"Yeah."
She was interpreting it as counseling.
"Until you pick someone…… we practice, right?"
Oh? I nodded.
"What do I do? I'll help."
Damn. Her common sense was already twisted, combined with her usual sense of responsibility and diligence.
"First, we need to match our physical compatibility."
"Physical…… compatibility……"
Her face flushed, but she didn't look flustered anymore.
"Okay. Order me around as much as you want. That's why I became your personal secretary."
Yoo-na looked at me and smiled brightly.