The Last Card
"Dream Stage Season 2 — the trainee who will claim that glorious first-place seat is...!"
The cameras found Do Won-woo and Han I-jae standing side by side on the stage.
"Which trainee will take first place?!"
Before the announcement, the host dragged the moment out, repeating the same line dozens of times. The live chat, as a result, had already lost its mind.
Everyone had seen it coming, but from a viewer's seat it was impossible not to realize: this was no way to treat a human being.
"All right! First place goes to...!"
Do Won-woo and Han I-jae stood together on the dais. Where Han I-jae looked almost indifferent, Do Won-woo's face had gone darkly, seriously grim. Maybe that was why his already pale skin looked even more deathly white. The audience had no idea why he seemed to be suffering that much. They just went feral over his looks.
It was the finale, so the chat was drowning in every kind of bait and provocation, and the host was bleeding the entire country dry in real time. In the middle of that chaos, the MC finally opened his mouth.
"The glorious winner of first place is!"
"..."
"We'll reveal it in sixty seconds!"
There was no way not to swear.
It was a pattern everyone had seen a hundred times, and yet it was the kind of moment that made you realize, all over again, that this was no way to treat a person.
Onscreen, Do Won-woo dropped his head. The broadcast cut to commercial, and a bright, cheerful jingle spilled out of the speakers.
The perfect ice water purifier — to elevate your quality of life...
While the ad ran, the chat filled with nothing but guesses about who would take first.
The commercial ended, and Do Won-woo and Han I-jae's faces filled a split screen once more.
"All right. We'll announce it now."
He said that, and then stalled all over again. Before the reveal, the cameras swept the audience, the spectators, the invited guests, and the trainees in turn. Won Ji-an appeared onscreen. He looked ready to collapse at any second.
"This time, we really will announce it."
Do Won-woo's head was still bowed, and his jaw was trembling, faintly. Even Han I-jae, who had been watching with that same blank calm, started to look annoyed, his brow knitting — then he glanced sideways, as if he were worried about the boy standing next to him.
"The long-awaited winner of first place is!"
Of course he didn't announce it immediately. The host let the silence hang a little longer. In that brief stretch of time, it felt as if the world itself had stopped.
And then the name, at last.
Han I-jae, who had been standing on the dais as if none of it touched him, dragged in a huge breath. Only then did a smile find his face. But he lingered on the stage a moment longer, as if Do Won-woo were still caught in his mind.
"Congratulations, hyung."
"Yeah. Thanks."
Do Won-woo offered his congratulations. His eyes, though, were almost out of focus. He was barely holding his expression together, so a lot of people didn't notice — but right now, Do Won-woo was one step from coming apart.
I didn't take first.
So what was left?
...Ah.
The cruel little hope I'd been carrying all the way to the end shattered into pieces.
No. They haven't announced ninth yet. Ji-an's name could still be called.
Han I-jae was giving his first-place speech right in front of me, and I didn't hear a single word. Every sound had turned to noise. Far off, I could see Won Ji-an looking at me.
I'm sorry.
When the first-place remarks ended, the microphone was passed to me.
"..."
"..."
Nothing came out. I didn't even know what I was supposed to say.
"Um... First, I'd like to thank everyone who's supported me up to this point."
I recited the remarks I'd prepared, like a machine. I had to manage my face. The fact that I was still managing it, even now, made me want to laugh until I lost my mind.
There was only one thought in my head.
What if Ji-an doesn't make ninth?
I bit down on my lip.
"I..."
I don't know what I was thinking. By the time I came back to myself, I was saying something that wasn't the speech I'd prepared at all.
"I think someone as inadequate as me has received far more love from all of you than I deserve."
I had no desire to play at humility. That much, though, was true. I'd fallen into this world one ordinary day, been handed the goal of becoming an idol, and thrown myself into singing and dancing for the first time in my life. My skill had been lacking, nowhere close to perfect, and I'd still been loved this much. Even second place, not first, was more than I deserved.
"To the trainees who helped this clumsy version of me so much after I came here. For reaching out first, and guiding me... I want to say thank you."
My voice wouldn't come out properly.
"Especially to Ji-an, who helped make sure I wouldn't be unhappy... I want to tell him I'm truly grateful. And that I won't forget. Yeah. I don't think I could ever forget."
Far away, Won Ji-an stood with his head bowed, listening. I adjusted my grip on the microphone, trying to still the tremor in my hands.
I knew. I knew I'd get torn apart for saying it. Won Ji-an wasn't the only one in the running for ninth.
But...
I meant it. Wanting to debut together. I didn't want to let him go like this. If I didn't say it now, I didn't think I'd ever be able to.
"Do Won-woo. You worked hard."
I finished my remarks and turned, and Han I-jae, standing beside me, pulled me into a hug. He was the type who normally hated that kind of thing — but today, something in him must have shifted, because he held on tight.
"You really did. You worked so hard."
"...You too, hyung."
I climbed the stairs, and the trainees already seated stood one by one and pulled me into their arms. They were smiling. It wasn't a smile.
When I turned around, the last remaining seat was waiting. A chair with a nine written on it.
Can Ji-an sit there?
I sat down, and the host prepared to announce the final ninth-place ranking.
"Dream Stage Season 2. Only one seat remains in the debut lineup. Who will take that last place?"
Lee Hyo-seop, the other ninth-place candidate, wore a face I couldn't read. He glanced at Won Ji-an, as if my speech had snagged on something in him, then looked straight ahead again.
Won Ji-an just stood there, vacant, his face drained of all color. It was as if he had no tears left to give.
"The long-awaited ninth place is..."
The stalling started again. A groan of disgust rolled out of the audience.
"..."
"..."
And I had to decide. Whether to play the last card I had left, or leave everything to fate.
In that instant, as if it had been waiting, the world drained to black and white, and time stopped. A glowing cube drifted in front of me.
The System had appeared again.
"You didn't take first place, I see?"
If I could have, I would have screamed right then and there. Instead, with the last of the reason I'd managed to hold onto, I looked the System in the eye.
"Yeah. I didn't."
I made myself sound calm. Inside, I was already wrecked, rotting, one breath from falling apart.
"'Yeah, I didn't' — that's not quite it, though, is it? If Won Ji-an fails to make the debut lineup, you won't be able to save him."
The System said it with a smile.
"Which means you'll have to play that last card of yours, doesn't it?"
I knew. I knew I had to use that.
The last card I'd kept as a final resort, for the possibility that I wouldn't take first and Ji-an wouldn't debut either. I hadn't been able to tell Ji-an I had it. Because he would have opposed using it — that much was certain. He would have stopped me by any means necessary.
"It can only be used until the final ranking announcement is over. Which means you don't have much time left."
My clenched fist twisted.
"Yeah. I know."
A system window opened in front of my eyes, and I saw the last card I held. I hesitated. I knew what would happen if I used it. That was why I was afraid.
"I'm curious, you know. Which choice you'll make."
The System, which had been laughing at me, vanished on those last words.
"Think it through carefully."
Color bled back into the black-and-white world, and the time that had stopped began to move again.
Won Ji-an was looking up at me. There was something uneasy in his face. He must have watched me talking to the System.
...Ji-an.
Then the host opened his mouth again.
"The trainee who will take that last remaining seat — the glorious ninth place — is...!"
Dying sighs rose from every direction. Trainees pressed their hands together as if in prayer. I just looked at Won Ji-an. It was the only thing I could do.
"Ninth place is!"
Time was moving, and yet it felt, somehow, as if it had stopped.
...Ah.
There was no reversal.
The instant the name was called, Lee Hyo-seop lifted his head and let out a long breath. Beside him stood Won Ji-an, his face like something with the power switched off.
...So this is how it ends.
Surrounded by the other trainees' congratulations, Lee Hyo-seop started toward the stage. He looked so happy. Of course he did. He couldn't not be. If it had been me, I would have worn that same expression.
But the moment that bright smile entered my eyes, it hurt as if a thorn had been driven into them.
If it goes like this, Ji-an will...
Disappear from this world. Carrying every last piece of my misfortune with him.
He said he regretted it.
Won Ji-an had said he regretted taking my misfortune in my place. And that he wanted to live. This life, at least.
I had to choose. The last card, usable only before the ninth-place announcement was over. Using it would end everything — but I would still be able to save him.
In that case...
There's no other way, is there.
I reached slowly toward the system window floating in front of me, and pressed the button.
This should be all right. With this.
Do you wish to use this item?
The last card I had.
Designate the target.
I took in the view in front of me, holding it in my eyes, and slowly spoke the name.
Won Ji-an.